


Carry On ~ (Completed)

by luna_ren_creations



Category: The Beatles (Band)
Genre: F/M, Fanfiction, Inspired by Music, References to the Beatles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-01-14 18:51:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 53
Words: 140,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18482269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luna_ren_creations/pseuds/luna_ren_creations
Summary: After years of precision and cleverly hiding the truth from their young daughter, the son of John Lennon attempts to put the many secrets of his life and his father's life behind him. When his daughter, Ashley is seventeen though, she discovers the secrets almost by accident. Horribly upset by knowing her parents lied to her for her entire life, she locks herself in her room and cries herself to sleep. But she wakes up in an entirely different year! Late 1963 to be exact. Unsure of how she even got there or why, Ashley quickly ends up befriending the big name stars and gets the chance of a lifetime to get close to a grandfather she would never know. Making a few mistakes and missteps along her path with them, Ashley learns some valuable life lessons. And maybe by being there, she'll get the chance to change the course of time forever. This is Carry On





	1. PROLOGUE

**Author's Note:**

> I had this story sitting in my old Wattpad account. It gained 17k reads and I really worked hard on this, even though I completed it a good 2 years ago, after spending 2 years working on it. So, I'm uploading it here, tweaking it and editing it. I hope it gains just as much love as it did on Wattpad and please enjoy.

**PROLOGUE:**

 

"She's beautiful." He smiled down at his newborn daughter. His wife smiled tiredly back at him as she watched him cradle the newborn.

"Have you decided on a name for your little one, Mr. Lennon?" The doctor asked him. His face darkened at the name. He looked at his wife.

"We should do this now." He said to her, to which she just nodded in agreement.

"Ashley. Her name is Ashley Julia." His wife spoke up, rolling the name for her they'd come up with months prior.

"Ashley Julia Lennon. It has a lovely ring." The doctor smiled.

"No. No her last name is Bunting." The little girl's father said urgently. The doctor looked perplexed.

"Sir...?" He asked.

"Ashley Julia Bunting. She won't ever have that other name. Ever." He said, looking down at his now slumbering daughter. This was the beginning of a new life for them.

 

*************

 

Ashley Bunting she became. Shortly after her birth, her parents had their surname legally changed to match. No one knew why, there were whispers throughout the media and many fights while Ashley was very young, but they all vanished as she slowly grew up. Her father became a world famous songwriter and her mother was a model to begin with, so she stuck with that profession. They lived in London England in a peaceful neighborhood in a large home. Ashley had everything she ever wanted. A spoiled child she was, but she was always humble. She was a sweet girl with a passion for music. From a young age she played guitar and sang for guests her parents had. She was always nice to her parents' friends, but she never had a friend of her own. She was home educated and very sheltered from the outside world. That changed when Ashley turned 14. A new family moved nearby from elsewhere in London. A rather famous family actually, and they had a daughter Ashley's age. That's how she met Sienna McCartney. Her parents balked at the idea at first for their secret reasons, but they could see that their daughter was smitten with this girl. So they allowed the friendship to flourish. But what they didn't know was that their allowing would lead to Ashley discovering the things they tried to keep from her for so long.

 

 

 


	2. ONE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley receives an unexpected surprise through her best friend, Sienna and her parents, upon learning who she was meeting that night, start acting strange.

**ONE:**

 

"Guess who?" A familiar voice poked me in the ribs from behind. I squeaked and turned around to face my best friend grinning happily. It was early December and cold had officially set in for the rest of the year. We'd just gotten a dusting of snow over London the night before. I was at school, Halton Prep School for Girls to be exact. Mum and daddy enrolled me when I was fourteen and oddly enough, my new best friend went to the same school. So you can imagine how school was for me with Sienna around. We were in our last year. After that I didn't know what I was going to do. Sienna said she wanted to go to America but I made her promise to take me. We were joined at the hip I swear.

"Hey." I greeted my friend cheerfully.

"Oh Ash I'm so excited I could burst." She said, her dark eyes dancing with wonderment. I closed my locker door and swung my bag over my shoulder.

"Well, well, do share." I said, walking down the hall with her.

"Grandfather is coming." She said, clapping her hands.

"Oh. Wow! It's been like what, two years since you've seen him?" I said, happy for my friend. I'd never met the man, but hey it was the one and only Paul McCartney we were talking about. If I actually met him I'd probably die. I guess you could say Sienna turned me into quite the Beatles fan when we first met. I mean I'd heard of them before but never really gave the subject much thought. But she really opened my eyes. And now I was a diehard fan.

"Yeah! He called just last night and said he'd be at my place when I get home from school." She said, literally looking like she'd burst from excitement. I laughed lightly.

"That's awesome, Sienna. You're so lucky to have living family." I said wistfully. I just had mother and dad. Neither had any siblings. Mother's father died when she was a teenager so I never even knew him and her mother died before I was born of cancer. My dad on the other hand, all I knew was his parents were long dead. He never spoke of them, I never asked.

"Well then I have one hell of a surprise for you." She said, stopping me.

"You're coming over tonight to meet him. No exceptions." She said, practically dancing with excitement. My jaw almost hit the floor.

"Shut up, no way!" I cried.

"Yes way!! Who's the greatest best friend?" She said. I laughed.

"You, obviously! Oh my God, you're wonderful!" I laughed. Everything seemed perfect that morning. But the day would turn out to be both upsetting and life changing.

 

**********

 

I couldn't keep focused for much of the day. Twice I got scolded by the teacher for daydreaming, to which Sienna just shot me an amused look. I knew she was as excited as I, maybe even more. When the final bell rang, Sienna and I ran like scalded cats from the property to our respective rides. Sienna to her family's limo and me to my family SUV. Drastic comparisons to say the least, but Sienna and I never viewed one another as richer than the other. Whereas Sienna's family definitely had more money, mine was just as well off, mother and dad never felt the need to drop a ton of money on a limo and chauffeur that's all. I was glad mother had picked me up anyway. Usually she was working late at the modelling agency and it was dad who came. Waving to my friend, I got inside the front seat beside mother.

"Hi honey. How was school?" She smiled as we pulled out of the busy lot.

"Alright, but I have something better to tell you. Is it ok if I go to Sienna's tonight? She has a massive surprise for me." I said, making my blue eyes as big and puppy dog like as I possibly could. She laughed.

"I suppose so. What's this big surprise? Or has she not told you?" Mother said.

"Oh she's told me. I get to meet her grandfather! You know, Paul McCartney? I'm so stoked." I said happily. Mother blanched at that and almost hit the person in front of us!

"Wh-what?" She stammered.

"Umm I get to meet her grandfather who's like one of my favourite people." I rephrased, puzzled at her behaviour. She took a deep breath.

"Okay. That must be exciting for you." She said, sounding rather distant suddenly. She was quiet for most of the rest of the ride home.

"What was that all about?" I thought. When I got home, I said a quick hi to dad who was working in the living room before running upstairs to get changed because I so did not want to meet one of my heroes in my tacky black and white school uniform. As I picked out what I was going to wear, I heard my parents raise their voices to one another downstairs!

"What the..." I asked myself as I crept toward my ajar bedroom door to maybe hear.

"It's too risky...don't need this...worked too hard..." Was all I heard dad say, as he kept lowering his voice.

"It'll be ok....know who she is...she'll be fine." Was all I heard mother say. Needless to say I was very confused, but decided to let it go as I picked out a pair of skinny jeans and a red long sleeved shirt. I debated wearing one of my many Beatles shirts, but I didn't want to seem like THAT much of a crazy fangirl. My black hair was a frizzy mess once I tugged the shirt over my head so I put some spray into it to calm it down and brushed it so it laid flat. My makeup was still okay from the morning so I just left it before grabbing my bag and heading downstairs. Mother and dad were sitting in the living room. They looked busy, but I knew better. They were worried. Seemed the norm these days when I went to Sienna's house. I didn't know why though.

"I'm ready. I can have Sienna pick me up or did you wanna drop me?" I said, sliding into my boots I brought down with me. Mother and dad looked at one another.

"I can drop you off." Dad offered, taking off his glasses.

"Okay. I shouldn't be terribly late. Sienna knows we have school tomorrow." I smiled, my excitement bubbling. Mother gave me a small smile as dad acknowledged my comment and went to grab the car keys.

"Have a nice time, dear." She said seemingly calm. But I noticed that her fingernails were clawing at her own arm.

"Oh I intend to." I beamed as dad opened the front door near to where the living room was.

"Don't be horribly late!" She called before I left.

"I won't." I called back. Dad was quiet as we got into the car.

"Did mother tell you?" I said, practically bouncing in my seat as we pulled out into the street.

"She did." He replied.

"Oh I could just die from excitement." I said excitedly. He paused.

"Be careful, Ashley." He advised, which puzzled me.

"Be careful? Why?" I asked.

"Just...be careful." He said but more forcefully.

"Dad, what's going on? I mention something I'm ecstatic about and you and mother act like I just told you I was running away with some guy who tried to sell me drugs or something." I said. Dad sighed.

"It's our job. Don't worry about it, Ashley. Just have a good time." He said, pretty much dodging the question as he pulled into the circle drive of Sienna's massive home.

"Okay. Thanks for the ride, dad. Sienna will probably see me home." I said. By that point I just wanted to get inside. I was almost trembling with excitement. Dad was confusing me and I didn't want to think about it.

"Alright." He said, getting out with me.

"You don't have to walk me to the door." I joked.

"It's okay. It's icy up those steps. I don't want you falling." He said, giving me a strained smile. So I shrugged and let him. We were about to head up when I heard a car come the drive behind us. Just as that happened, my phone went off. It was Sienna texting me and her message read 'he's just arriving now'. I swivelled my head around immediately.

"What is it?" Dad asked as we stood at the base of the steps. The engine shut off and I watched as an older man got out of the drivers seat. I almost had a heart attack. It was him. But I hardly had time to react because the most peculiar thing happened. He saw dad. Dad froze like a lion guarding his young which I thought was weird. They made eye contact and it was eerie.

"I have to go, honey." He then said rather fast.

"Oh. Okay. Bye." I said, unsure how to react to what had just happened. Did they know one another? Seemed ...sort of likely with dad being a big name in the music industry. But the reaction was just weird. Before I thought more about it though, I bounded up the steps, not even caring about Ice and I heard the tires of our car squeal as dad gunned it off the property.

"Alright then." I thought as I opened the big door with a half hearted knock. They considered me family there so I always just walked in.

"It's me." I called. Sienna came barrelling down the steps.

"Oh it's you." She said breathlessly. I pretended to look hurt.

"Geez. Thanks a lot." I pouted.

"Oh get over it you baby." She teased, yanking me down the hall and into the living room.

"He's here though." I mentioned.

"Oh! Why didn't you say so?" She said, dropping my arm like a hot potato. I laughed.

"You're such a goof. I didn't say because the oddest thing just happened. My dad and he saw one another and ...dad just took off like he was running from a crime scene. I think they know one another." I said.

"Hm, maybe through record labels?" She said.

"Yeah that's what I was thinking. I..." I stopped when the doorbell went. Sienna ran like a madwoman to let her grandfather in, I just stood in the living room, suddenly unsure of what to do.

"Oh Ashley. You're here." Sienna's mother said, peeking her head into the room. I waved.

"Hi." I said simply.

"Are you shy?" She asked.

"Hm? Oh no. No I...I'm good." I said. I guess I could have gone to meet him then, but something compelled me to just take a seat. Sienna's mother just chuckled and left me. It wasn't long before they all came into the living room too. Sienna's parents were first, talking up a storm and then Sienna followed by the man who'd scared my father off. My hero.

"I'd like you to meet my best friend. Ashley Bunting. Ashley, meet my grandfather." Sienna said, her eyes dancing. I stood up like I'd been electrocuted.

"Um...hi there. It’s absolutely amazing to meet you...I-I'm sorry.." I said, laughing nervously. I guess I didn't have enough time to rehearse what to say to the man. He smiled pleasantly.

"It's nice to meet you, Ashley." He said calmly, shaking my hand.

"You too." I said dumbly. Mentally face palming, I just sat down. Sienna gave me a look that almost made me laugh out loud. I totally botched that if I did say so myself. I was kind of on cloud nine after that. The adults and Sienna were talking a mile a minute and I just sat there taking it all in.

"So Ashley, what is it your father does?" A question from the man of the hour snapped me out of my daze.

"Oh… you don't know? I-I just figured you knew one another. Umm he's the CEO of Zavitz/Bunting Records." I said, clasping my hands in my lap. He nodded slowly.

"I do know your father. Or at least I knew him many years ago." He said.

"Oh? How?" I asked, feeling myself relax. He looked at me funny for a minute.

"No, of course you wouldn't know." He muttered.

"Pardon?" I asked.

"Oh nothing. Just I knew your dad when he was a boy. I...knew his father." He said carefully.

"Dad..." Sienna's mother suddenly said with a warning look. I looked at Sienna, thinking I must have had the stupidest expression on my face. What was going on??

"Well that's interesting. Dad never speaks of his father." I said curiously.

"Well I can't say I'm surprised." He said under his breath. Sienna's dad stood up quickly.

"I'm going to go check on dinner." He said.

"Sienna, would you please take Ashley upstairs for a bit?" Her mother then said.

"Um, sure mum." She said, looking as confused as I felt. I followed her upstairs to her room.

"Why is everyone being so weird?" I wondered. I'd get my answer soon enough.


	3. TWO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley learns the truth about her lineage from an unlikely source and feels like her entire existence is a lie.

**TWO:**

 

Sienna's room was definitely bigger than mine. You could fit like three beds in there. Her large bed was neatly made  and her walls were coated with posters. It was one of my favourite places in the world, but my mind was so distracted I hardly noticed how much I loved her room.

"Okay. You have any idea what that was about?" Sienna asked once the door was closed. I shook my head.

"Not a clue. My parents were the first ones acting super weird and now your family. I'm lost." I said, turning my palms upward.

"It's gotta be connected somehow, I just don't know how." I said, staring at my favourite poster in her room of John Lennon. He'd been long dead, but he was always my favourite.

"Well he doesn't have the answer." Sienna joked, nodding her head at the poster. I smiled.

"Yeah I know." I giggled.

"Let's just forget it. It's probably adult stuff. Might be over by the time dinner is on the table." She said, sitting on the edge of her bed.

"Probably." I agreed.

 

*********

 

Half an hour later, we were called back down. Sienna and I just ended up watching videos on YouTube to kill time and to distract myself. My mind was still on whatever was going on and it bugged me. Dinner smelled wonderful as we came back down.

"Sorry about all that, girls." Sienna's mother apologized as we entered the dining room.

"Oh don't worry about it. We kept busy, didn't we, Ash?" Sienna smiled at me. I sat down next to her and nodded.

"We did." I replied. I fell quiet again through dinner. Sienna was talking about school and stuff. I was included in the conversation of course, but I never had more to say than the occasional yes or no. As the meal finished, I sensed I was being watched. I looked to my left and yes, Sienna's grandfather, Paul McCartney, one of my favourite people was staring at me. I don't think it should've made me feel weird, but it totally did.

"So your dad is a record CEO. And your mother?" He asked me suddenly.

"Um, she's a model." I said dumbly.

"A model. Interesting. And what is it you want to do?" He said.

"Well, not model if that's what you're saying." I said, allowing a small joke as a cheeky smile tugged at my lips. He just looked at me with a mysterious smile.

"I love music. I want to play music one day I think. Whether that's write songs like dad or play them as an artist or maybe write and sing. We'll see. I also like to draw too so...you know who knows right?" I said. I drew a little but I preferred singing and playing." I said. He just nodded.

"Well it sounds like you've got some ideas." He simply said. I looked to Sienna and she gave a half shrug. Such unusual questions from a worldwide legend indeed. I cleared my throat.

"Umm yes. I do." I replied, picking up my plate and bringing it to the kitchen.

"Thanks honey. So how do you like our guest?" Sienna's mother smiled as I put my plate down for her.

"He's nice." I said, starting to help her.

"I'm sensing maybe he scared you a little?" She asked me.

"What? No. Oh no. Nothing like that. It's really amazing to meet him. Just everyone has been acting so weird today." I confided in her. She pursed her lips and nodded.

"I know. I'm sorry for that. There's nothing to be concerned about. He means well." She said. I nodded.

"I'm not worried." I smiled. I left her after that. Sienna wasn't in the dining room anymore, no one was so I followed the sound of her voice back to the living room.

"Hey where'd you disappear to? You're missing concert pictures." Sienna said. I looked over to see a slide show playing on the television connected to a laptop. They were from the last Paul McCartney tour, I could tell. I slowly sat down.

"Who takes all these?" I asked.

"Usually I do." Was his answer. I just nodded.

"Well I'll let you guys enjoy this. I'm going to go help your mother." Sienna's dad said to her mostly. I didn't even hardly notice. Sienna started talking again as the slide show ended.

"So tell me, is touring as a soloist now better than when you were with a band?" I asked him curiously.

"No. Not at all. It was always more fun with band mates. I've got a crew sure, but with band mates you form lasting relationships." He answered, looking at me again with a funny expression.

"I-I bet you had some great times back in the Beatles days then." I said, tucking my hair behind my ear. Sienna looked pleased that I was finally having a good conversation with him.

"Yeah. Too many to count really. Your grandfather always was the backbone of all the havoc." He said with a light laugh. I froze at what he said. Once he realized, he froze too.

"Oh...I wasn't supposed to say that." He said, looking shocked with himself. Sienna's mouth was literally open.

"What did you say?" My voice squeaked.

"Nothing." He tried to wave it off.

"M-My grandparents have been dead for years. I'm sure you have me mixed up with someone else." I said, suddenly feeling stunned like a deer.

"Of course. Because that's what you've been told." He said softly.

"What do you mean? What's going on here?" Sienna asked. He looked uncomfortable like he wasn't supposed to be talking on the subject.

"I shouldn't say anymore. Your mother will have my head." He said to his granddaughter.

"So?" Sienna said.

"Do-are...are you saying that my grandfather was..." I trailed off.

"John. Lennon. Yes." He finally came out with it. It was my turn to have my mouth fall open.

"Wha-how...why was I never told?" I said.

"It's a very long story." He said. I felt like laughing and crying all at the same time. Laughing purely out of shock. This meant only one thing. I'd been lied to for my entire seventeen years on this earth by my own parents!

"I-I have to go home." I said, standing up slowly.

"It's not even totally dark yet." Sienna said, standing up too.

"I-I'm sorry. I have to go." I said, feeling myself shaking.

"I'm sorry, Ashley. This is my fault. I shouldn't have blurted it out." Paul said. I let out a breath.

"No. You did me a favour actually." I said in a strange tone of voice I'd never used before.

"I'll tell mom I'm taking you home then." Sienna said, running off. I felt like I might cry much more about then just standing in the living room.

"If it's any consolation, your parents hid the truth from you to protect you." He broke the silence.

"How did you know? You knew dad when he was little then because of ..." I trailed off. He nodded.

"Yes. I was like a second father to him. But once he met your mother, he changed. He wanted his own life and didn't want to be followed by his family name. I knew he had a child of his own but by then he'd cut all ties and changed your family name. I had no idea it was you until I saw your father earlier today." He explained.

"So the small talk, the questions about what my parents did for a living, you knew already?" I asked.

"I didn't. Your father got his break in the record industry after you were born. Same for your mother." He explained.

"God...why did they think lying to me would be protecting me?" I said, tugging the ends of my hair, something I did when I was stressed.

"That I don't know. You'd have to ask them. I personally think it was wrong but I have no say in the matter." He said as Sienna came back.

"The limo is out front." She said, looking worried.

"Thank you." I said to Paul. He had just changed my life forever. He just nodded as I left with Sienna. Her mother was by the door.

"I'm so sorry Ashley." She said of her father's behaviour.

"Don't be. Thank you for dinner." I said softly before putting on my boots and coat and leaving with Sienna. I was quiet for the entire ride. I didn't know what I was going to say or do when I saw my parents. I was angry and upset so I knew it wouldn't be pleasant.

 

*******

 

I dropped my bag at the door once I got in.

"Ashley. What are you doing back so early?" Dad said, looking up from his work in the living room. I felt emotions raging.

"How dare you." I said in a low voice.

"Excuse me?" He said, irked at my tone.

"You lied to me. You-you and mother lied to me!" I said, my blue eyes welling with tears. Dad then swore strongly. Something he'd never done in my presence.

"What did he tell you?" He demanded, getting up.

"The truth." I said boldly. Mother came down the stairs.

"What's going on down here?" She asked. A tear spilled over.

"You both have been lying to my face since I came into the world. What harm would it have done to know the truth?!" I cried. Mother looked at dad.

"She found out. HE told her. I knew this would be a bad idea." Dad said.

"He only knew who I was because you got out of the car." I cried. Mother tried to go for me.

"We're sorry honey." She said. I backed up.

"How could you do this to me?" I cried.

"We were trying to protect you." Dad said.

"But why? Sienna knows who she is and she's fine! Why should I be any different?" I exclaimed.

"Ashley, there's differences. We didn't want you to be followed around by people just because of your name. We wanted our own life, own path not made for us by predecessors." Dad said.

"That still doesn't justify it. I don't care if I had millions of people following me around. I still should have known! Haven't you always told me that family is the most important?" I cried.

"Yes, but this is different. Your father was angry for many years after his father died. Felt it was his own fault." Mother tried to explain.

"He got shot, point blank by a crazy man. How was that his fault?" I demanded.

"That doesn't matter Ashley. We have our reasons for not telling you. But now you know. Let's just leave it at that." Dad said before walking away and slamming the door of his study closed.

"So basically you guys chose to not tell me the biggest secret of my life because dad had his own daddy issues?" I said in a bitter tone.

"Well..." Mother searched for an answer.

"Well that's selfishness if I ever heard of it." I sniffed.

"Ashley, now that's not..." Mother started.

"Save it. Nothing you can say can make this better. You lied to me for basically nothing. And I'm never going to forget this. Sienna shouldn't have been the one to introduce me to the music and the era you held back from me. I just can't believe you lied." I cried before running up the stairs and slamming my door shut too. I fell against the closed door sobbing my eyes out. Who did you turn to when your own parents went behind your back and lied about who you really were for your entire life? I stared at my one ceiling to floor poster of the Fab Four with blurred vision from my tears. The four of them smiled into the camera looking like they hadn't a care in the world. I looked right at my grandfather.

"Why?" I asked.

"If you were here now would you be happy with what dad did?" I sniffed. He wouldn't answer. Of course not, he was an image on a poster. Still crying, I changed into black yoga pants and a grey plain t shirt and put on my headphones. I hit the shuffle button on my iPod as I curled up in my window seat. The first song that came on was Anytime At All from the A Hard Day's Night album. One of my favourites. Curling up in a ball, I closed my eyes and let the music wash over me.

 

*********

 

I woke up to the should of birds chirping.

"I must've slept straight through the night." I thought, opening my eyes. To my utter surprise, I was outside!

"What the...?" I said aloud. I was in some sort of park laying on a park bench like some homeless person. I sat up immediately.

"How did I get out here?" I thought. I watched as people walked past giving me odd looks. Then I realized something. First off, it was bloody cold outside and secondly, everyone walking past was dressed like they were attending some kind of decades party. The women all in dresses, the men in suits...

"What's going on?" My mind screamed. A man walked past with a newspaper and he tossed it in the trash by the bench. So I pulled a total Marty McFly and reached into the bin for the newspaper. I scanned the heading, my heart pumping. And then I saw the date. December 8, 1963!!!

 


	4. THREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After waking up in the past, completely freaking out, Ashley runs into a familiar face who willingly takes her under his wing.

**THREE:**

 

  1. I was sitting on a park bench in _1963_! How was this even possible?!



"Well that's simple...I must be dreaming." I said to myself. I pinched my arm to try and wake myself up.

"Come on. This is just a crazy dream. Your life is in 2015." I thought. Nothing was happening.

"This is crazy!" I said aloud, to which I got more weird looks. Throwing the newspaper down, I started running. The park was somewhat familiar, but not quite. People kept on looking at me like I was from another planet and it was scary. I might as will have been from another planet. I didn't look like any one else. I was in yoga pants for God's sake!

"What am I going to do? How in the world did I end up fifty years in the past?!" I thought, my heart racing. The last thing I remembered was ....

"Crying myself to sleep..." I remembered. And what had happened. Meeting one of my heroes, finding out the truth about who I really was...

"And now I'm in the past?!" I thought. None of it made sense. People blurred past me as I kept running. Where to, I had no clue. I suddenly came to a stop though when I crashed right into someone!

"Oh my God I'm so sorry." I said, totally flustered.

"Where are you off to in such a hurry?" I heard a strangely familiar voice. My eyes travelled upward to meet friendly brown ones. I was face to face with Paul himself!! Except he was fifty years younger. I'd only ever seen the young him in videos and photographs. This was really trippy to me.

"If it's even real." I thought.

"Oh...I don't know. I'm all backwards." I stammered, feeling dizzy suddenly.

"Well it looks that way. Where did you get clothes like that anyway?" He said, amused at my look. I looked down. I totally stood out like a sore thumb.

"Oh ...you wouldn't even believe me if I told you." I said with a half laugh. He smiled.

"Well at least let me help you find something more suitable." He offered.

"Oh, no please I couldn't. I barely know you." I said which wasn't exactly a lie. I'd only met him ...well older him just a day ago.

"Don't worry. I don't bite. I'm Paul by the way." He introduced with a charming smile. I chuckled.

"I know who you are." I said.

"Oh...fan, right. See I never get to actually introduce myself much anymore." He said with a slight shrug. I smiled at him.

"I'm sorry. Here let's try again." I offered. He looked at me funny, but went with it.

"Hi, I'm Paul." He rephrased.

"Nice to meet you. My name is Ashley." I replied.

"Ashley. That's a lovely name. Can't say I've met an Ashley before." He said.

"Well... it must be a unique name." I said simply. For Ashley was hugely popular in well the future I guess.

"Well come with me, Ashley. We'll get you some better clothes." He said.

"Wait, aren't you going to ask me where my parents are or why they let me out of the house dressed like this? Anything?" I asked curiously. It didn't seem normal for someone to just straight up offer to take me clothes shopping.

"No. I like you. Besides if you had parents here, they'd be close behind you. I'm guessing you aren't from here." He said in a relaxed tone as we began walking together. It was so weird. I felt so at home around him and like I said I'd only just met the future him hours ago. Maybe it was because I'd grown to know him through the music.

"Well aren't you a perceptive one. I am actually London born though. I-I do live here. Just not...here, here." I tried to explain.

"How do you mean?" He asked as we paused before crossing a street.

"Well...." I searched for the right way to tell him.

"No way. He'll never believe you. Ever." I thought.

"I'm from the future." I blurted. I suddenly felt like an idiot. He almost stopped in the middle of the street.

"God, I'm sorry. You probably think I'm a crazy person." I said, covering my face in shame.

"You're from the future?" Paul looked perplexed. I swallowed hard.

"Mhm...I can't believe it myself." I said, quieting my voice.

"From what year?" He asked curiously.

"My goodness you're just rolling with this? I say I'm from the future and you hardly bat an eye at it." I said, casually amused at his laid back demeanour.

"Hey, I keep my mind open. You say you're from the future, you're from the future." He smiled.

"Well alright then. And I'm from 2015 to answer your other question." I said.

"Wow. 2015. That means I'd be...." He trailed off.

"73." I said without missing a beat.

"Wow you're good. Are people better at simple math in 2015?" He joked. I laughed.

"No, I just know. I've been a fan for quite a while." I said.

"Oh! Are we still a band in your future?" He asked curiously. I bit my lip.

"I-I shouldn't say. I should just let you live your own life. Make your own path." I decided. Who knows what I could unleash if I messed with time. If that's indeed what I'd done. But I'd watched all three back to the future movies so I knew what NOT to do.

"Hmm. Fair enough. Tell you what. I'll be the only one who knows you're from fifty some odd years from now. To everyone else you'll just be my friend from out of town. How's that sound?" He offered.

"Everyone else? No, no I have to figure out how get home. I can't stay in a time where I don't even exist." I said. Paul lead me into a nice dress shop near to a bakery that smelled wonderful.

"Well how did you get here?" He asked, sounding disappointed that I didn't plan on staying. I paused.

"I-I don't know. One minute I was...crying… then I woke up here." I said softly.

"Why were you crying?" He asked. I bit my lip again.

"Umm, family issues." I said, beginning to rummage through the selection of dresses the shop had to offer.

"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that. Well, since you don't know how you got here, it wouldn't hurt to stick around for a bit would it? I'm sure the lads would love to meet you." He said. I almost dropped the dress I picked up to try on. The lads. That meant...

"Oh crap." I thought. I'd be meeting my dead grandfather. The one who I just found out I was related to! I didn't know how I'd handle that.

"Umm sure. That sounds okay. I mean if you guys don't mind having a girl around." I said, acting a little shy to hide the fact that my heart was racing. He laughed.

"Oh believe me. They'll be glad to have a girl around." He said. By then, I'd chosen a few pretty dresses to try on. Paul, like the gentleman I always knew he was decided to just wait near the door until I was ready to pay. All three fit nicely. A navy blue one, a white one and a nice purple one. I also chose just a plain grey one to wear out of the store along with a simple pair of black heels so I didn't look like such a fashion failure stuck in 1963. Along with (I must embarrassingly admit) a few undergarments as well I was finally ready. I didn't plan on staying ages, so I thought this would get me by.

"They all look really lovely, Ashley. Even the one you're wearing." He commented as the lady was packaging up the dresses. (Thank GOD he didn't see the underwear, I would have died).

"Oh. Thank you." I said, hiding a blush. As we headed outside, Paul hailed for a cab.

"Come on then. Let's go introduce you to the rest of the crew." He offered as the cab pulled over for us.

"Alright." I agreed simply. Emotions raced through my head, half of which I didn't even know what to call them. I was going to meet the very person my parents tried to hide from me. Would I like him? I hoped so. I liked him enough already. But that was just as a fan. Not a descendant. It would be freaky meeting George too who also had been dead a long time. And Ringo of course. I sat back and chewed on my lip, something I did when I was uncomfortable or nervous. In that instance I was mostly nervous. I didn't really know what to expect.

 

*******

 

"Well, here we are. Our home away from home." Paul said, unlocking the door to a massive flat in central London. I whistled lowly as he swung the door open. It was totally 60s decor, but it was very lovely.

"You're telling me four men live here?" I teased. The place was so spotless!

"Only when we record or are playing shows. And we have a staff of maids who you know, keep this place clean. Come on in. Make yourself at home." He waved to me. So I stepped onto the place, bags in hand.

"It's really lovely. Is no one else here?" I said, looking around.

"Oh probably not. But don't worry, they'll all be back." He assured me. I took a quick look around the place. The living room had lovely couches and two chairs, an oak coffee table and one snazzy baby grand piano. He noticed me looking at it.

"Do you play?" He asked.

"Only a little. I'm better at guitar." I admitted.

"Well here, how about a little lesson. But first let's get you settled." He said. I couldn't argue with him as he led me down the hall past three bedrooms.

"Those yours?" I asked dumbly.

"Yeah. George and Ringo share but I don't think they mind much. Gives them time to gossip about John and me." He joked. A smile tugged at my lips in such a way that made Paul stop.

"That smile...reminds me of somebody." He said.

"I-I can't imagine who. It's just me." I said. I didn't know who he would possibly mean anyway.

"Anyway, yeah. Here's your room." He said, opening the door to reveal a quaint spare bedroom.

"Oh. Well thank you kindly." I said, stepping inside.

"My pleasure, Ashley. Make yourself comfortable. Then meet me at the piano." He smiled before leaving me. Once he did and closed the door, I pressed my fingers against my temples and let out a deep breath.

"Okay Ash. Get a grip, you're clearly just losing your mind." I said to myself. This wasn't happening. This could not possibly be happening.

"But it is." I whispered, looking at my reflection in the mirror. My black hair hung down around my shoulders and it looked foreign next to my decades old outfit. I didn't even know how I would go about fixing it up. I had an elastic band on my wrist from God knows when so I took it and tied my hair back in a high pony tail that made my face appear thinner. It seemed to suit the dress so I left it like that. Smoothing my skirt and taking another breath for courage, quickly organized my new wardrobe before I walked out of the bedroom and back towards the living room where I heard a lovely melody being played. I entered to see Paul at the piano, playing a nice tune.

"Hey. What's that you're playing?" I asked him. He looked up.

"Oh, it's just a tune I came up with. Tunes tend to rattle around my head sometimes and I need to just get them on to the keys. You look nice by the way. With your hair like that." He said, without missing a beat. Trust him to always be the charmer.

"Oh. Thanks, I didn't know whether it would look right or not." I said, reaching up to touch it.

"No it suits the look. And you. Why don't you come here and show me what you can do on the piano." He said.

"Okay." I agreed. I really only knew a few songs. Nothing spectacular. I sat down on the bench beside him and my fingers hovered above the keys.

"Don't make fun of me." I teasingly warned.

"Hey, scouts honour." He said with a twinkle in his eye. I took a breath and played the first chord of a tune. He wouldn't know it, the only piano songs I could play were ones I wrote myself. I focused on each key as I played the familiar tune. I didn't sing though. I wasn't going to sing for him.

"Yeah, I'm not that great." I said, stopping.

"What? No you're really good, Ashley. What's that song called?" He said.

"Oh i-it's a song that I wrote." I told him, a little sheepish.

"Well it's lovely." He told me.

"Thank you. It's called Breaking Free." I shared with him.

"Sounds wonderful. Do words go with it?" He asked.

"Um yeah, but you know it's still in the works." I said, getting up.

"So, you're a songwriter in the future? I musician?" He asked.

"Budding I guess you could say." I nodded. It was odd because I'd just had a similar conversation with him back home the night before. Talk about déjà vu on like a whole other level! I was about to say how many songs I'd written when the door to the flat swung open and I heard three overlapping voices. The others were home. Paul got up from the piano and stood by me.

"Hey, there's a girl in here." Ringo remarked, coming into the room first.

"Oh, come off it, stop playing games." I heard a teasing voice that almost made me fall over. John followed into the living room with George behind him.

"I told you." Ringo said.

"Paul how many girls are you gonna bring here?" John joked, looked me over.

"No, it's not like that. This is Ashley..." He stopped because I hadn't given him my full name! Remembering our promise/plan, I jumped in.

"Bunting. Ashley Bunting. I'm Paul's friend from out of town." I said.

"Ashley. What an interesting name. John remarked. I felt my heart racing. I knew this would be one hell of an adventure.

 

 


	5. FOUR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley gets used to life in the early sixties, not to mention life with the Beatles. She gets along very well with most of them, though John still seems to be somewhat abrasive towards her.

**FOUR:**

Those guys stayed up real late. They may have had unlimited amounts of energy, but I was tired pretty quickly. It had been one interesting day to say the least. Paul tried to make me as comfortable as he could, but I have to say I was rather star struck. This was all just insanity to me, and I couldn't still figure out how I was here. George and Ringo were nice and polite to me which was sweet, but John seemed to almost purposely avoid eye contact or speaking with me past the casual greeting he gave me upon meeting me. It made me a little uncomfortable, being his granddaughter and all...which I'd just you know, found out! But anyway, I turned in pretty quick and once I closed the door, I realized I had no pajamas. It was one thing I didn't pick up. Luckily though, I still had my pants and t shirt from home, so I just put those back on before crawling into bed.

"This is so weird." I whispered to myself as my eyes started to close. To be honest, I mostly expected to wake up back at home.

 

*******

 

The sun spilled in through my window the next morning, rousing me instantly. The first thing I realized was that I was not back home. Actually, when I first opened my eyes, I was scared before I remembered what had happened.

"Right. I'm the time traveler." I muttered to myself as I rubbed my eyes. As I woke up more, I heard faint piano music coming from the living room and couldn't help but smile. Quickly getting up, I changed into the navy dress I got and tried to fix my hair to the best of my abilities. To my surprise it didn't even look half bad. Usually it was an utter mess in the morning!

"Maybe things are different here." I shrugged before exiting the room. My feet took me directly to the living room where I indeed found Paul plunking put another tune on the piano. He saw me in the doorway and stopped playing.

"Ashley! I didn't wake you, did I?" He asked.

"Oh no. The sun did." I smiled.

"Oh yes, the first light always hits that room first. I could have you moved if you'd rather..." He started.

"No, it's okay. I'm an early riser anyway." I assured him.

"Okay. Are you hungry? Breakfast is sort of every man for himself around here but I'm sure I could fix something for you." He offered, getting up. He really was cute.

"Alright." I agreed with a chuckle. If I didn't let him do something for me, I feared he would combust. So, I followed him into the kitchen just as the other members of the house started rousing. I heard a shower start in the washroom as I curiously looked around again.

"We're going to be at the studio today. I was hoping you'd come along." Paul snapped me back to attention as we walked past what I'd been introduced to as John's room. The door was closed. I felt a lump in my throat. Everything in my mind was still fresh from well...two days ago now I suppose. Not to mention his abrasive behaviour so far. I thought that he'd probably be a tough nut to crack but I desperately wanted to know him...like on a more personal level, I guess. Because I knew I'd never get another chance.

"I wonder if that's why I'm in the past?" I thought. Sure, it made no sense but still... But then I thought,

"Oh my gosh! Won't mother and dad notice I'm missing? It's been like two days!" I was still mad at them, but it still worried me a little. I didn't know the rules of traveling back in time. For all I knew I'd be missing back home, and Sienna would be frantic as well as my parents, Sienna's parents and probably even Paul. Like you know, future him.

"Are you okay, Ashley?" Past Paul spoke again as we reached the kitchen.

"Hm? Yeah, I'm okay. I'm just… thinking about home." I said, lowering my voice. He nodded.

"You miss your family?" He asked.

"Well...I guess. I'm just wondering if they'd find me missing." I said.

"You told me things weren't great with your family. Are you feeling bad about that too?" He asked curiously. I shook my head.

"It was their fault. They… um lied to me." I said hesitantly as no one other than John himself came into the kitchen.

"Good morning." I forced myself to say. He turned to me.

"Hi." He said bluntly. I let a breath out.

"She isn't comin with us, is she?" He directed the question at Paul.

"I don't see why not. I am supposed to look after her." Paul said, going back to our cover story. John didn't look too pleased at that.

"I just wish we'd known she was coming." He said like I wasn't even in the room which I found kind of rude.

"She won't be a problem. Right, Ashley?" Paul said.

"Uh no. No, I'll behave." I said, cracking a small smile. John just huffed and left the room.

"What's his deal?" I asked Paul once he was out of earshot.

"Oh, who knows. He may be all bristly on the outside but once you get him to open up, he's really a good guy." He told me.

"Hm... challenge accepted." I thought to myself. If he was the reason, I was here then I wanted to get through to him as fast as possible so I could get home.

 

********

 

I sat quietly for the whole car ride to the studio and just watched as the four guys chattered up a storm. It was sort of like watching one of their videos except I was living it and it wasn't in black and white. As we drove down the streets, I just took in the different atmosphere more intently than the first time.

"You look as if you've never seen London before." A voice interrupted my thoughts. I looked to see it was George who had spoken.

"Oh...well I haven't. I'm from out of town." I lied somewhat smoothly.

"How far out of town?" He asked.

"Umm...couple hours past London." I said, searching for a believable answer.

"And just how long do you plan to stay?" John finally asked me a direct question. I was almost thrown completely off guard.

"Oh… well until my parents come for me, I suppose." I said. Okay that sounded really dumb.

"Her family is going through a bit of a crisis, that's why she's here." Paul valiantly stepped in.

"Oh. I'm sorry to hear that." Ringo spoke up.

"Um thanks." I said, looking down. Crisis wasn't exactly the word, but I wasn't gonna argue. I sort of sideways looked at John. That got me thinking of mother and dad again.... My dad wasn't even thought of yet!

"Wouldn't that make me here utterly impossible??" I thought. It was making my head hurt like anything, so I had to stop thinking about it.

"You are Ashley Bunting. You're a friend of Paul's from out of town whose family is going through hard times. That's what you're going to be." I told myself firmly. That's the only way I'd get through being here and achieve whatever I was here for. When we arrived at the studio, I walked beside Paul into the building. I was really quite distracted by everything surrounding me as the boys did what they had to do to get themselves ready. I couldn't believe I was actually in the famous studio. I'd been there before with Sienna, but this was different. I was here with THEM.

"Want to see where the music happens?" Paul asked with a sweet smile.

"Uh huh." I said eagerly. So, I followed him and half listened to George, Ringo and John chatter on about something probably not important as we entered the sound studio. I saw all their famous instruments in there.

"Woah." I breathed, almost not believing what I was seeing. Paul’s bass, John's pretty acoustic, George's amazing hollow body and Ringo's drum set. I have to admit I was in a great state of wonder as I just watched the boys go to work like it was natural to them. I didn't mind one bit just sitting outside their sound booth listening to them record some of the greatest songs in music history. The one thought that was racing through my mind was

"Sienna would flip if she was here." But of course, she wasn't here, it was only me. Alone stuck in 1963.

"Don't think about it, Ash." I reminded myself

_If I give my heart to you_

_I must be sure from the very start_

_That you would love me more than her..._

 

I tapped my feet along to the familiar beat of the song I'd heard only 10,000 times. Paul saw me looking through the glass and smiled right at me. It made me feel giddy of course, I mean he was so freaking adorable with his dark hair constantly falling in his eyes, those mesmerizing doe eyes, not to mention his adorable smile. He was a sure-fire lady killer, that one. They all were for that matter. They all had their own charm to them. George was always deemed the quietest Beatle and yet he had so much personality just bursting behind those dark eyes of his. Ringo was usually the one most picked on and yet he had charisma that I noticed right off. Him and George seemed pretty tight which I already knew but Ringo and John seemed to have a bond as well. And that seemed odd to me because besides Paul I didn't see John really cozying up to anyone else. Yes, John. The mystery man. My granddad. He was a curious case; I'd always known him from a fan standpoint as the smart ass guy with a heart of pure gold. I mean, everything he lived for right up until his tragic death was beautiful. But in 63, he was just a surly young man with a huge chip on his shoulder. I knew his past had been rough, his mum... actually as I thought of it, I realized this now was my entire family history. Woah. But anyway, his mum died when he was young. Julia was her name. I sat there wondering if that's why my middle name was Julia. It seemed unlikely but I guessed I'd never know. He'd always been a bit of a rebel; my question was why was he so blunt with me so far? Did he have something against me? I didn't know.

_That when I tell you that I love you, oh_

_You're gonna say you love me too...oh_

_And when I ask you to be mine..._

_You're gonna say you love me too..._

 

John's melodic voice interrupted my thoughts. He had such an amazing talent. After that song, I guess they were done whatever they needed to do because they came out of the sound booth for a smoke. All four of them lit up at once and the smell was absolutely nauseating.

"Want one, Ashley?" George offered. I shook my head politely.

"No thank you, I don't smoke." I said.

"So, Ashley what do you think of our music?" Ringo suddenly asked out of curiosity.

"Oh, I love it. I've loved your music for a few years now." I smiled.

"Ah so she's a fan, Paul. You failed to tell us that." John said with a raised eyebrow. Paul shrugged.

"Didn't think it was a topic that needed discussing. She's a friend of mine, you'd think she would be a fan." He said with a charming wink in my direction. I smiled at him. He was such a sweetie.

"There's another question. I've never heard you mention this Ashley Bunting before. Why all of a sudden has she come into your life?" John asked, looking at me with narrow eyes. I suddenly felt put on the spot. Paul just blew out a thick cloud of smoke almost right in my face.

"I don't share the lives and relationships with every friend I've come in contact with. She's just falling on hard times. The least we can all be his hospitable and kind to her." He said, his voice turning slightly sterner toward his older friend. John was just silent as his glance moved from me.

"That's an idea. How about we go grave a bite to eat?" George suggested. The other lads seemed pretty alright with that idea. Bless George. So, with that we all headed out of the studio.

"Don't let him get to you." Paul murmured to me as we left. I knew he was talking about John. How could I not let him get to me? He was everything to me right at that time and all I wanted was to get through his shell.


	6. FIVE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley still struggles to get through to John and wonders why he's such a jerk. Her emotions reach a head and she knows she has to find a different tactic, because she does not want to give up on him.

**FIVE:**

 

The boys and I went uptown to this cute little deli to grab a bite of lunch. While I ate, I was bombarded still with questions. Not just from judgemental John Lennon but George and Ringo too. They were all most curious about me. Paul I could tell had to curb his tongue because he was supposed to know me! Questions came at me like 'How old are you?' Seventeen. 'What's your favourite colour?' Purple. 'Do you have any siblings?' Nope. 'Do you have a sweetheart?' No. 'Do you fancy anybody?' No one in particular. 'What's your favourite kind of man?' I'm not picky. I was beginning to think I was some big star being interviewed. After lunch, to my surprise, we had to go back to the studio.

"Just for a little bit. We have to wrap up some tracks." Paul informed me. He asked me if I'd be bored waiting for them to run through one more song and of course I said no. It was an absolute honour and once in a lifetime privilege to watch them jam together.

"This has to be real I'm obviously not dreaming from what I can tell." I thought to myself. I only wished I had my phone to take pictures of what I was actually experiencing. Of course, that would mess with history, me having a smartphone in the early sixties! As we walked back into the studio, my eyes met those of another man who I'd seen and read about. Brian Epstein. He looked at me funny like I didn't belong there which I guess I didn't.

"Who's this?" He addressed the lads as we passed.

"Oh, this is Ashley." John said absentmindedly as he lit up another cigarette.

"Well who is she?" He asked more specifically. My goodness they certainly didn't think talking like a person wasn't standing five feet in front of them was rude as anything did, they?

"She belongs to Paul." George said which reminded me of their first film when asked about the 'little old man' in the train car with them.

"She's a friend of mine from out of town. Her family is going through rough times so she's staying with me for a spell. She won't cause trouble, right?" He said, using our cover once again.

"Right. It's a pleasure to meet you, sir. My name is Ashley Bunting." I said as politely as I could to make a good first impression on the band's manager.

"And I you. Perhaps you could keep these four in check for me when I'm not around." He smiled at me.

"Oh, I'll try." I giggled, to which John just snorted. It took everything I had to not backhand him for being a snot. It was my first day in a whole other timeline and the man who would one day be a grandfather dead before my time was being a complete ass to me.

"Don't let him get to you." Paul's words earlier that morning echoed in my head. So, I just rolled my eyes visibly at him and walked off with Paul tagging along after me.

"Ashley?" He called. I stopped.

"I'm sorry about his behaviour, I really am." He said sympathetically. I just decided to brush it off.

"Oh, don't worry about it." I shrugged.

"Hey, you said you knew some guitar, right?" He suddenly asked. I nodded my head.

"Maybe he'd soften up if you played some music for us." He suggested. I looked back at John talking with George and Ringo as they headed in our direction.

"Hm, maybe." I said. It wasn't a bad idea.

"Well come on then." He smiled eagerly as he led me by the hand. That's right. I was holding hands with Paul McCartney. Back in that day that was quite the statement in public! But hey we were friends. And we weren't in public. As we entered the sound booth, the other three caught up with us.

"Well don't you move fast, Ashley." John jeered at me noticing that I was still holding Paul's hand. I just bit my tongue and let go of his hand.

"It's not like that. He wanted me to sing and play for you guys." I said calmly. John gave me a disbelieving look.

"You can sing, Ashley?" George asked.

"Yeah I sing. Music is everything to me." I told him. I noticed Paul has gone over to grab an acoustic guitar that just happened to be John's.

"Here. Play this one." He said, handing it to me.

"Hey that's mine you know." He interjected as I thought he might.

"Don't get your knickers in a twist, I'm not gonna hurt it." Those words spilled out of my mouth in a sarcastic tone before I could stop them. Normally I never spoke that way to anybody. But that man was seriously getting on my every last nerve. He looked at me with an incredulous stare but kept his mouth shut when Paul shot him a warning glance. The guitar felt rather familiar in my hands and I couldn't figure out why. My guitar back home looked quite similar, maybe it was the same brand.

"Umm what would you like me to play?" I said, suddenly feeling flustered after snapping at John.

"Whatever you like." Paul encouraged. I started strumming a few chords from a well-known song to me.

_There are places I remember_

_All my life though some have changed_

_Some forever not for better_

_Some are gone and some remain._

The lyrics filled my head, but I couldn't sing them! This was one of their songs! One they had yet to write!

"Oops." I thought, stopping.

"Why did you stop? That was quite the little tune." George said.

"Umm that was nothing. I was just warming up." I said. I couldn't divulge the title and lyrics of a nonexistent song.

"Ashley writes her own songs." Paul informed the others.

"Oh, is that right?" Ringo was intrigued by that.

"Yeah I write songs. Here let me just think." I said, thinking of something that they might know. And suddenly the tune just came to me

_I'll never let you see_

_The way my broken heart is hurting me_

_I've got my pride and I know how to hide_

_All my sorrow and pain_

_I'll do my crying in the rain..._

I only maybe heard this song once in passing but it was weird. The lyrics and music came to me like oxygen.

_If I wait for cloudy skies_

_You don't know the rain from the tears in my eyes_

_You'll never know that I still love you so_

_Though the heartaches remain_

_I'll do my crying in the rain_

_Rain drops fallen from heaven_

_Could never take away my misery_

_But since we're not together_

_I look for stormy weather_

_To hide these tears, I hope you'll never see._

I looked up at the lads briefly to see Paul tapping his foot to the beat, Ringo nodding his head along, George with an adorable smile on his face and John...didn't even seem interested.

_Some day when my crying' done_

_I'm gonna wear a smile and walk in the sun_

_I may be a fool but till then, darling_

_You'll never see me complain_

_I'll do my crying in the rain_

_I'll do my crying in the rain_

_I'll do my crying in the rain._

I finished to thunderous applause from my critics. Well three of them. John just still looked displeased at me.

"You have a lovely voice, Ashley." Paul complemented.

"Thank you." I blushed with pleasure.

"Yeah you play good too." George said. Another wonderful compliment.

"Watch out John, she could join the band with that talent." Ringo teased. John just got up and yanked the instrument from my hands.

"You're all making it sound like more than it is. She's good but not great." He said. I felt like I'd been hit by a truck. That was a kick to the gut if I ever heard one. An optimist would say at least he said I was good, but I looked at it as an insult. And frustration and anger started bubbling inside of me. I'd been so upset knowing mother and dad lied to me about him being my grandfather and how much I loved him as a person and musician only to travel back in time - which was scary on its own - to find out that your grandfather and favourite person on the planet in the history of music was a complete jerk!

"What is it with you? I've tried to be nothing but nice to you despite my circumstances and you keep on shutting me down! I don't know what I've done to hurt or upset you but please, for the love of God stop being such an ass!" I yelled at him finally losing all patience. I could feel a headache coming on. The room fell dead silent and I suddenly felt like bawling my eyes out. I couldn't meet John's gaze, but I knew his dark coffee eyes were boring into my head.

"Maybe you and I should step out for a moment." Paul finally spoke gently. I felt my blue eyes well full of tears at his soft tone.

"Okay." I whispered before leaving the room without I second glance. I sort of didn't want Paul to follow me as I pushed the door open that led outside to the back of the building. I buried my face in my hands and just started to cry. I suddenly felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me. I was surprised and a little bewildered to see Paul was hugging me. Seemed a little much since we'd just met, but it was somehow comforting.

"I'm sorry. I just lost my cool." I sniffed, stepping back.

"Don't you worry about it. He shouldn't have said what he did. You did a wonderful job." He comforted. I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand and he immediately offered me a handkerchief. What a gentleman. I took it and dried my eyes.

"Thanks. I'm sorry it's just...all this is a little much still." I said, gesturing to the buildings nearby. He nodded slowly.

"It must be. Well, I have to get back inside. You stay out here for as long as you feel you need to." He said softly. I just nodded and stared at the floor. With that, he went inside. I leaned against the stone wall and rested the back of my head against it.

"Just calm down." I thought to myself. I could hear mother's soothing voice in my ear. She said the same thing whenever I was upset. 'Think a happy thought. Something to make you smile and before you know it, your problem will get better.' I sniffed and finished drying my eyes.

"Pull yourself together. Everything will work out..." I thought.

"I hope." I was going to head back inside when suddenly the door opened again. Thinking it was Paul, I said

"I'm okay. I was just going to come back in." But it wasn't Paul. It was John. Backing up a little, I felt a little apprehensive. He looked at me and noticed I'd been crying.

"Ashley...its Come to my attention that I've been rather unkind to you." He said, a little distantly. I twisted the handkerchief Paul gave me in my hands.

"Did Paul tell you to say that?" I asked, looking at the ground.

"No. He's not my mother, Ashley. I upset you with what I said and I'm sorry. I should be more understanding due to your situation. You're right." He said, the sharpness coming out of his voice. Was this the same John who'd been nothing but mean to me since I'd arrived?

"Umm it's okay. I'm...sorry for what I said too. I'm normally not that curt." I said softly.

"Hey, I'm a big boy. I can take it. I guess I was just a little put off by you. I-I'm not used to girls being around all the time unless I'm ...you know, with them." He said sheepishly. I reddened at that. _**TMI** _

"Um, well I can assure you that's not happening." I said stupidly. He just chuckled lightly.

"Anyway, maybe we could start over? I promise to be less of an... how did you say it? An ass to you in the future." He said with a quirky little smile. I smiled too.

"Sure." I agreed, sticking my hand out for him to shake. He looked puzzled a moment but then shook my hand.

"Well alright then. Now how about you come on back inside?" He said, opening the door for me.

"Will do." I said, feeling much better. Maybe I was getting through his shell after all.

 

 

 


	7. SIX

**SIX:**

Well after that the rest of the day was pretty uneventful. The lads went back to the flat with me in tow then went out for the evening. I was invited to come along, but I knew they would be clubbing and probably getting drunk and such so I opted to stay in. Paul tried to make sure I'd be occupied but I assured him I was fine. After they left and the place was quiet, I paced around the flat, figuring now was a perfect time to explore. I wasn't the prying type at all, but I couldn't resist just a quick peek into their separate rooms. George and Ringo's room was pretty simple just two beds on either side of the room and dressers. Paul's room was the most articulate living space I'd ever seen in my entire life. Everything in its place and all that. Then was John's room. I almost didn't go in just because I wasn't sure what I'd find. I don't think anyone knew the real John Lennon and well, a lot could be told from the upkeep of one’s bedroom. Like for instance mine would tell you immediately that I was a busy student with a passion for a band who's been broken up forty some odd years. Deciding to risk it all, I pushed open his door, but it was much the same to Paul's. Very neat and very meticulously organized, though he did have a guitar casually laying on the bed. My fingers suddenly ached to touch the guitar, as if it had been literal eons since I'd played.

"He'd kill you though." I thought. If John came home from his evening out to see me in his room playing his instrument, I'm sure the slight step forward in our friendship thus far would be eradicated. So, I just decided to give up on my snooping expedition and sit down at the piano instead. My fingers danced over the keys on hesitation as I racked my brain as to what I should play. I knew more guitar than piano, but Sienna had taught me a few things. Mostly Beatles songs or just solo John Lennon and Paul McCartney songs.

"Well I can't play those here..." I began to think. But then again.... they weren't here. I could play whatever I wanted! My fingers struck up the first chord of one of my favourite songs Let it Be.

_When I find myself in times of trouble?_

_Mother Mary comes to me_

_Speaking words of wisdom_

_Let it be_

My voice rang out clearly over the piano chords.

_And in my hour of darkness_

_She is standing right in front of me_

_Speaking words of wisdom_

_Let it be_

 

_Let it be, let it be_

_Let it be, let it be_

_Whisper words of wisdom, let it be_

 

Singing this song made me think of my mum and how far away from me she was then. She wasn't even born! And I got thinking of the argument again and what had happened.

 

_And when the broken-hearted people_

_Living in the world agree_

_There will be an answer, let it be_

_For though they may be parted_

_There still is a chance that they will see_

_There will be an answer, let it be._

 

Should I have let things be with the truth of my heritage? To me it still felt like my parents' fault. They wanted to protect me from a life I should have had for reasons not grounded. I'd understand if John had been like a wanted criminal or had beaten dad at a very young age before passing away, but I knew that wasn't the case. Sure, he had his share of mistakes in his life but didn't everyone?

 

_Let it be, let it be_

_Let it be, let it be_

_Yeah there will be an answer, let it be_

_Let it be, let it be_

_Let it be, let it be_

_Whisper words of wisdom let it be._

 

My fingers flew over the ivory keys and I could feel the music flowing through my veins. I couldn't think about my parents anymore. It would only bring me farther down.

"Just let it go. There's not a thing you can do about it right now." I thought.

 

_Let it be, let it be_

_Ah Let it be, yeah let it be_

_Whisper words of wisdom_

_Let it be_

 

_And when the night is cloudy_

_There is still a light that shines on me_

_Shine until tomorrow_

_Let it be_

_I wake up to the sound of music_

_Mother Mary comes to me_

_Speaking words of wisdom_

_Let it be_

 

_Let it be, let it be_

_Let it be, let it be_

_Oh, there will be an answer_

_Let it be_

_Let it be, let it be_

_Let it be, yeah let it be_

_Whisper words of wisdom_

_Let it be..._

 

I finished the familiar song. The quietness of the empty house surrounded me once again, so I struck up another tune. One preaching an entirely new message.

 

_Imagine there's no heaven_

_It's easy if you try_

_No hell below us_

_Above us only sky_

_Imagine all the people_

_Living for today..._

I wondered if he was alive in my own future if he'd still believe in what he did all those years...from now...or ago…

 

_Imagine there's no countries_

_It isn't hard to do_

_Nothing to kill or die for_

_And no religion too_

_Imagine all the people_

_Living life in peace..._

_You may say I'm a dreamer_

_But I'm not the only one_

_I hope someday you'll join us_

_And the world will be as one._

It really was a beautiful song. But the world had fallen much more to pieces than it had when he penned this tune. Mass murder of innocent lives, the twin towers, the wars in the Middle East...his timeless song seemed almost like a fading echo in the waves of time. But to me it still spoke volumes.

 

_Imagine no possessions_

_I wonder if you can_

_No need for greed or hunger_

_A brotherhood of man_

_Imagine all the people_

_Sharing all the world..._

_You may say I'm a dreamer_

_But I'm not the only one_

_I hope someday you'll join us_

_And the world will live as one_

 

It was hard for me to see then how this snarky, boat full of attitude young John Lennon would turn into such a philosophical and poetic man with a family he adored. But history had a way of making itself happen in the blink of an eye. I only hoped I wasn't interfering with me being here. But then it dawned on me as I got up from the piano. It was almost 1964! I knew the Beatle history like the back of my hand! Their new album, A Hard Days Night would be released soon, the boys would head to America for the first time and then Paris... John should have been married to Cynthia already and Paul should have been with someone too.

"Uh oh." I whispered. I didn't know if that was my doing, I wasn't sure I wanted to find out. I tried not to think about it much, or I'd stress myself right out.

"Nothing is my fault; I didn't ask to be sent back in time." I said to myself as I walked to the kitchen for a bite to eat. Of course, all the foods I normally would eat and know what packaging to look for were completely different. I eventually found a package of what looked like a pasta dish of some kind and it came with instructions, so I ended up cooking that and eating it while reading a recent newspaper nearby. I normally never did such a thing but the magical little thing known as Wi-Fi hadn't been invented yet, so it was my only key to not being bored silly. After I finished my meal and cleaned up my mess, I decided to switch on the television set for just some noise and ended up tidying the place up out of just nothing else to do. I'd envy my solitude shortly. About half an hour later, the lads came in chattering over one another and they'd clearly had some to drink, as is predicted. Now I had no experience in the area of drunken men, but I guess now was my time to find out.

"There she is! The girl of the hour." Paul said in a slightly giddy tone of voice.

"Hi guys. Enjoy your evening?" I asked, putting on a smile.

"Oh, Ashley you really should've been there, there was a live band and girls and music and girls..." George slurred. Oh, dear god.

"Well I'm glad you had fun. Now I suggest you get some sleep or you're all going to have one hell of a hangover come the morning." I said, beginning to use a tone of voice that sounded a lot like mother. John suddenly just scoffed at me as he lit up a cigarette.

"Listen to you, little miss housewife. May be news to you, love but we don't need a mummy to tell us what to do and when to sleep." He said with all the sarcasm money could buy. I just rolled my eyes. Well there went the good feelings I was beginning to feel towards him.

"Whatever. I'm turning in, you guys can take care of yourselves then." I said, mostly just unsure of what to do next.

"Awe c’mon Ashley stay up with us! The nights still young." Paul said, taking off his jacket and throwing it on the couch. Now I knew this could be a very bad idea.

"No, I think I should turn in." I said in a former tone of voice.

"Listen to no fun Nelly. Poor girl she'll never find a guy willing to put up with her." John said half to himself.

"Better watch your tongue, John. You'll spit flames soon." I said in a biting tone. I had no patience for rude remarks. He just looked at me like I'd spoken out of place. Maybe I had, it was a different time, but did I care? He needed to learn I could be just as stubborn and abrasive as he. I kid you not, we glared at each other for two minutes straight. My mind tried to replay the sweet apology he'd given me earlier but that didn't matter to me anymore. My grandfather or not, whether he'd tried to make amends to me earlier, the man was still a huge pain in the ass and twice as stubborn as any mule would be.

"Go to bed, Ashley." He finally told me.

"Oh. Now whose sounding like my mother?" I retorted. By now, the other three Beatles were just staring at John and me.

"Oh, you've got a mouth on you do ya? Better take care of that." He said, moving closer to me. I tended, wondering if he was going to hit me before Ringo stepped between us.

"John, leave her be." He said in a stern voice. He sounded completely sober actually. John tried to ignore the drummer, but Ringo was persistent. John finally gave up and took a long drag on his cigarette before calling me an obscenity under his breath. I would have throttled him too if not for Ringo's knowing blue eyes.

"She's right, you know. You all should get some rest. Come Ashley, I'll walk you to your room." He said. I thought that was rather silly, but I could still feel adrenaline pumping through my veins, so I said alright and followed him out of the living room without so much as a goodnight.

"I'm sorry for John." Ringo said once we reached my bedroom. I sighed and shrugged.

"It isn't your fault. He's just hard headed is all." I said, lowering my voice so he wouldn't overhear. Ringo nodded.

"Sure, that's part of it. Anyway, don't let him bother you. I'll make sure he stays well enough away from you." He said in a sweet tone of voice. I smiled.

"That's sweet of you. Thank you." I said. He bid me goodnight after promising to make all the others go to bed and I locked myself in the bedroom. Everyone ...well Paul and Ringo so far had both told me not to let John get to me. I guess him being like this would just be something I'd have to get used to.

 

_You may say I'm a dreamer_

_But I'm not the only one_

_I hope someday you'll join us_

_And the world will live as one_

 

Where was that man? Would I ever get to see the real him? Or would my experience of being around him be shrouded in poor behaviour and a twisted spirit? I thought about this dismally as I changed for bed and crawled under the covers.

 

_And when the night is cloudy there is still a light that shines on me_

_Shine until tomorrow_

_Let it be...._

_Just let it be._

 

 

 

 

 

 


	8. SEVEN

**SEVEN:**

Well I was right. The lads except good old Ringo woke up the next morning terribly hung over. I tried to bite back the 'I told you so' remarks but I'm pretty sure they got the message. I'd been up pretty early, still sort of working through everything. What I made sure left my mind during the day played on my mind at night. Where was I to mother and dad? Had they called the police to look for me yet, thinking I'd run off? What division did you contact when your daughter traveled back in time? Did they know that's where I'd gone? All these unanswered questions swirled through my tired head before I heard someone stumble to the bathroom. Prying myself away from the window where I was thinking, I decided to go and make some breakfast up for the hungover boys. It would keep me busy at least. As I left my room my eyes found a tired and sour looking John coming out of his room. I bit back an angry retort at him, still unimpressed with his behaviour and our row the night before. He didn't speak to me, just blew past.

"Well alright then." I thought, straightening my skirt before marching into the kitchen. Ringo was already in there to my surprise, just sipping on coffee and reading the same newspaper I had been perusing the night before.

"Ashley. Good morning." He smiled at me once he saw I'd come into the room.

"Good morning, Ringo." I said nicely back to him.

"Would you like some coffee? I could..." He started to get up.

"No, I can take care of myself. Thank you though. I came to fix something for our drunken fellows." I said, nodding my head out toward the bedrooms. Ringo smiled.

"You've got a good heart, Miss Bunting. Especially after John's behaviour last night." He said in an admiring tone. I smiled and gave a little half shrug, leaving something I planned on doing to Mr. Attitude a little bit later, unsaid.

"Well it's mainly for Paul. He's been so nice to me since I got here." I said innocently as I got down three mugs from the cupboard I found pretty easily and filling them with the strong black liquid. I left George's and Paul's black, to help with their probably pounding heads but with the last one, John's, I made it like I was going to put extra care into it. Ringo wasn't really looking so I swiftly went for the salt shaker at the back of the counter, unscrewed the cap and dumped a generous amount of the stuff into his coffee. Ringo rattled the paper and I stopped quickly but he hadn't looked up. Smiling evilly to myself, I thought that John would finally see that I was one girl he couldn't mess with. I stirred the salt in to mix it evenly before leaving the cups on the counter, John's marked by the spoon in it while I whipped up some bacon and eggs. I was itching to get my revenge on him as I dished out the food for everyone just as the three others came into the kitchen half alive.

"Ashley, is that you are making that wonderful smell?" Paul asked. I could tell in his voice he hurt.

"Yes, it's me. Now sit down, all of you." I instructed mainly to poor Paul as I helped him to the table. George seemed pretty good on his own and John probably would kill me if I touched him. Which was fine by me, gave me time to execute my prank. I swiveled around to grab the plates of food, even for Ringo and me. They mumbled something of a thank you I suppose before I went back for the coffee. Paul, George...and I took the spoon out before giving John his. And then all I had to do was wait. Leaning back against the counter with my food, I waited until he took his first sip which happened to be massive. His reaction was golden! His face contorted into this weird expression before the liquid went spewing out all over the table. I tried so bloody hard to hide my laughter, but I absolutely could not.

"Alright who the hell did that?!" He roared. The other boys looked almost afraid to laugh, though a grin was threatening on Paul's lips. I on the other hand was cackling so hard I could barely breathe. And suddenly he was towering over me.

"What makes you think that was funny, girl?" He growled at me.

"Oh, get over yourself. You totally had it coming." I said boldly, standing up to my full height. He was still considerably taller than me, but I was not backing down.

"I did, did I? Lemme ask you a question, how the hell old are you?!" He thundered. I snorted.

"Seventeen, yourself?" I said with sarcasm dripping from each letter.

"You better stop while you can, John. She's got you beat." Paul said, laughter in his voice.

"She has not got me beat! This was a childish and mean-spirited prank." He growled at his band mate.

"Oh yes and your reaction now is completely mature." I said, widening my blue eyes to look so innocent. This was perfection for me to watch. That only angered him more.

"You've got attitude, girl. You're lucky you're Paul's guest or I would ..." He leaned in and growled in my ear.

"Or you'll what?" I challenged, squaring my shoulders. He could tell I wasn't going to wilt under his power. I was just as stubborn as he. If not more. He scrambled for an answer and I took it as my out. I turned my palms upward and walked to the center of the kitchen.

"Face it, Lennon. Ashley one, John zero." I said before blowing a sarcastic kiss and leaving the room. I walked briskly to my room and shut and locked the door before a grin crept onto my fave. My heart was pounding out of my chest!

"But you did it. You showed him you're not afraid of him and you won't tolerate him being a jackass." I thought, rather proud of myself. I tidied my living space a little while I just waited to see what the agenda was today. That and I knew if I came within I five feet radius of John all hell would break loose. And I needed some time to come up with more stubborn remarks. I didn't like fighting with him, I was his granddaughter for God's sake! But he was making things impossible. About fifteen minutes after my epic win, there was a brisk knock at my door.

"Who is it?" I asked.

"It's Paul." Was the answer. So, I smiled and opened the door.

"Has the colour returned to his face yet?" I joked, inviting him in. Paul chuckled and shook his head.

"You really gave it to him, Ashley. Wish I had the guts to do what you did." He said. I suppose it was a compliment.

"Is he positively steaming?" I asked.

"Oh, I imagine so. He stormed out of here not long after." He said.

"Oh...well I didn't want that to happen I just wanted to teach him a lesson." I said, suddenly feeling a little bit bad.

"Don't worry about him. He'll be back singing like he hasn't a care in the world soon enough." He assured me.

"Oh. Well alright. How are you feeling?" I said, flipping the subject.

"Better. I think I could use some fresh air. We aren't needed in the studio today. Perhaps you'd like to join me?" He said in his usual gentleman like tone. I smiled.

"Sure, that sounds like a nice idea." I agreed. So, I primped myself a little before grabbing a jacket that Ringo had generously donated to me once he realized I hadn't a coat against the brisk weather. It was grey and simple, but it did the job. I was a little excited I guess, because how often did a girl get to walk around town with Paul McCartney on her arm?

"Ready, love?" Paul asked as he waited for me near the door. George and Ringo were elsewhere in the flat, so I didn't get a chance to say bye to them. I always felt a little red in the face when Paul called me love. I mean I'm sure he did that with every female but to me it sounded special.

"Yeah I'm ready." I smiled at him and so we left the flat side by side.

 

*******

 

London was hopping as it usually was even back in my time zone. I have to admit I felt pretty special walking alongside the famous singer. We did attract some stares, which I had anticipated but I just held my head high as if I was acting a part in a film. My slight worries about John throwing a hissy fit were long behind me.

"You're a natural at this." Paul suddenly remarked.

"A natural at what?" I inquired.

"Usually every other girl I've gone out on the town with has been shy and constantly trying to hide from fans and reporters who might be around. You're braver than they." He said with an admiring smile.

"Oh well, thanks." I said, flattered at the comment. Just as he finished saying that though, from behind us we heard...

"Is that...and... Oh my god!! Paul!!" Quick as a flash, Paul grabbed ahold of my hand.

"Can you run in those things?" He asked, looking at my heels. I felt adrenaline pumping. My first escape from fans.

"Oh yeah." I said, though I wasn't entirely sure.

"Okay then run." He said, launching into a flat out run and basically dragging me behind him. The sidewalk was just a blur as my feet ran alongside him. The screams of the girls chasing Paul dwindled after a few blocks and my lungs were ready to bust. And then it happened. I stepped wrong and my ankle twisted badly.

"Ow!" I cried, screeching to a halt. Paul stopped too.

"What happened? What's wrong?" He asked, immediately concerned. I was hobbling on my ankle by then, leaning against the outside wall of a shop. The pain had set in.

"I went down on my ankle." I winced. Paul immediately knelt down to have a look.

"You don't have to...I'm fine I'm sure." I said a little embarrassed he was gonna look at my ankle.

"Nonsense. Does this hurt?" He asked, moving it a certain way. I inhaled sharply as pain shot through it.

"A little." I said in a tight voice.

"You've definitely sprained it Ashley. I'm gonna go inside here and call George and Ringo to bring the car. You should get it checked out." He said, his dark eyes full of concern. I grimaced.

"Alright." I didn't have the heart to argue. He helped me hobble over to a bench nearby.

"So much for our outing if it's gonna end with me in the emergency room." I dryly joked as I sat down. He chuckled softly.

"It will be an adventure. Don't worry about anything. I'll be right back. Keep weight off it." He said, briefly kissing my forehead which shocked the living hell out of me. I didn't have the chance to mention it though as he had basically run into the store. I just sat there watching traffic go by.

"Blast these shoes. I could've run barefoot. Who would've that hurt?" I thought to myself, trying to keep my mind off my throbbing ankle. And as if my morning couldn't get worse, out of the corner of my eye I saw no other person but John walking down the sidewalk towards me. He must've noticed I only had one shoe on as my ankle was now starting to swell. I didn't expect him to stop to talk to me or anything. But he did.

"What the hell happened to you?" He asked, very little emotion to his voice.

"I uh, twisted my ankle pretty bad. Paul's inside calling for a car." I said, flicking my hair over my shoulder. His response was nothing, but a sarcastic pity smile and he said

"Well, well isn’t that interesting?" Before stalking off. If I hadn't been in pain, I would've jumped him for that remark. He insinuated that my ankle was payback for spiking his coffee with salt earlier that morning.

"Jerk." I thought miserably just as Paul came back out.

"Oh, don't you look miserable, poor thing." He cooed at me. I didn't feel like telling him about John, so I kept my mouth shut.

"Did you get ahold of George?" I asked finally.

"I did. He and Ringo are on the way." He said, reaching in his pocket for a cigarette. I was gonna make him put it away, but I didn't want to complain as he lit up. The smell reminded me of the one corner of the school property where all the 'cool kids' hung out for a smoke. Sienna and I always liked to make fun of them. It made me a little homesick for my timeline. For Sienna for school, for.... mother and dad. I shook my head trying to dispel all the thoughts.

"You alright?" He asked me, snapping me back.

"I guess so." I gave the hint of a smile. My ankle really hurt.

"So, tell me about home." He asked.

"Well...I don't know if I should." I said hesitantly, wondering if something I said would alter time.

"Oh no nothing like that just tell me about you. About your daily life." He said out of genuine curiosity.

"Oh, well I'm in school. Final year with my best friend." I said, feeling a twinge of sadness.

"You've got a best friend? What's her name?" He asked. I paused.

"Sienna." I finally answered.

"That's a really pretty name, Sienna." He smiled.

"Of course, it is, you named her." I thought. It was a little fact she'd told me once. I thought it was sweet.

"Yeah it suits her. She's pretty. Prettier than me..." I trailed off.

"Oh no that's not true. You're a very pretty girl, Ashley." He said. I chuckled.

"Thanks Paul." I said absentmindedly. Truth be told I didn't think I was all that pretty. Mother was a goddess of beauty, but I'd ended up taking after dad's looks and his side of the family which now that I thought about it made me wonder if I shared any traits with John. My grandfather. The jerk. I massaged my temples suddenly feeling stressed.

"Hey it's okay. They'll be here soon." Paul said, thinking I was in pain over my ankle which I was, but my mind was working overtime at the same time.

"Yeah." Was all I could answer. Before I knew it, a sleek black car I didn't even know was in the lads' possession pulled up at the curb.

"That's us. Can you walk?" Paul said, offering his hand to me as he extinguished his cigarette. I slowly got up and hopped.

"I uh, think so." I answered, hobbling towards the car with his help. I saw George get out of the passenger seat and open the back door for me.

"How did you manage to hurt yourself, Ashley?" He said with a twinkle in his eyes.

"It was my fault." Paul said.

"Oh no it wasn't. It was fan-girls." I said with a light laugh as a got into the backseat.

"Fan-girls?" Paul asked.

"It's a term in ...." I trailed off as I realized George and Ringo were present. I couldn't divulge my real identity.

"Family." I finished dumbly. But Paul smiled, knowing what I meant.

"What are hospitals like here?" I asked Paul, suddenly feeling a little apprehensive. This was 50 years before modern medical technology. Paul just took my hand in his and gave it a squeeze.

"Don't worry. I'll make sure you're well taken care of." He promised.

 

 

 


	9. EIGHT

**EIGHT:**

Well the hospital wasn't near as bad as I thought it would be. Paul refused to leave my side though the entire time, bless his dear heart. The doctor took an X-ray and determined that I'd just sprained my ankle but advised me to keep off it for a few days. He wrapped it up right before sending me back home with 3/4ths of the lads. John was still off somewhere I was sure, and I didn't particularly want to see him anyway. The doctor also gave Paul some pain killers to give me to help me sleep and with that we were off. By then it was late afternoon, we'd wasted hours in the hospital waiting room. George and Ringo were talking about going out again that night as I started feeling a little sleepy.

"Will you come with us?" George asked Paul.

"No, I think it's best if I stayed with Ashley tonight." He answered.

"Paul you don't have to, I'm fully capable of looking after myself." I tried to interject.

"Nonsense. You're injured. The least I can do is look after you." He said gently. I couldn't say no to those eyes. When we got home, I had a hell of a time getting up the front steps so much so that Paul just gave up and scooped me into his arms.

"You really don't have to!" I protested with a light laugh. But there was no arguing with him. He set me down though once we got to the door. I was a little bit flustered but mostly grateful. Bed sounded wonderful to me as George opened the door to the flat and he and Ringo went on inside. With Paul's help I limped on inside as well. To my surprise, John was in the living room with a guitar, papers all over the coffee table, a pencil sitting on top of his ear and he had on these wide rimmed glasses I'd only ever seen in really old photographs.

"You finally brought the klutz home, did ya?" He said without looking up. I felt like he'd kicked me in the gut. So much for Paul saying he'd get over it. I opened my mouth to retaliate, but Paul stepped in.

"That was very unkind, even for you." He said boldly.

"Paul don't worry about it." I sighed, not feeling up to fighting with the man again. John turned to look at the four of us.

"So... what happened?" He surprisingly changed demeanor.

"She's just got a sprain but has to keep off of it for a few days." I felt like I'd just gotten mental whiplash. Suddenly he'd turned from cynical and mean to curious and somewhat compassionate. Paul led me over to sit with him as I tried not to hang my mouth open like a fish in shock.

"Does she need anything?" He asked.

"Do you?" Paul asked. I shook my head mutely. Was this happening? It was like the day before at the studio all over again. I sat in a stunned state as the lads began talking about music again. I was dropping off just because of the adrenaline that had gone through me from hurting myself, but I was wide awake due to John's sudden 180 from when he said to me and I quote 'ain't karma a bitch'.

"Are you tired, love?" Paul suddenly spoke to me.

"She would be. It wears you out injuring yourself like that." John spoke up. Another shocker.

"I'm fine." I tried to protest. It wasn't even dinner time yet.

"You really should lay down, Ashley. Even if it's for a little while. We'll make sure to keep quiet." George said with a cute smile.

"Alright. I suppose I could rest for a little bit." I agreed, going to get up. Paul helped me as usual to my room.

"Do you need help like I can get you something more comfortable to wear." He said.

"No that's okay. I can take care of myself." I assured him.

"Alright. You get some rest. We'll be quiet." He smiled at me before he left the room. I painstakingly changed into my pyjama clothes and closed the blinds in my room. I crawled into bed and just laid atop the covers. I didn't even feel that tired, but I was out in no time.

 

_"Ashley. What a beautiful name."  My vision fuzzed as my eyes opened and it was like I was watching a movie. I could see a hospital room and it was dark out so probably late in the day. Mother was in the hospital bed looking tired but happy as anything with daddy by her side. There was another man there holding a newborn baby._

_'Is that me?'  I wondered. I tried to go closer, but it was like a glass panel was blocking me from getting closer._

_'A beautiful name for a beautiful girl.' Dad said. It was me. Who was this man? He started to hum a tune I wasn't familiar with._

_'Is that your new song?' Dad asked the man._

_'Yeah. It's for her.' Was the man's answer._

_'Beautiful girl, ready to take on the whole wide world...' He sang softly._

_'It's lovely, dad.' Dad said. My heart almost fell out of my chest. It was John?! My..._

_'My grandfather. He's meeting me for the first time.' I thought feeling tears spark my eyes. Then suddenly everything went dark and I was then waking up on the main drag near the Dakota in New York City. My heart pounded in my chest as I stood there, knowing in my soul what was happening. The sky was dark, there was a nip in the air._

_'Oh no...' I whispered. I saw John and his wife Yoko (I realized she would be my grandmother) walk past me like I wasn't even there._

_'John!!' I cried his name, running down the sidewalk after him. And then I saw him. The man who would assassinate him._

_'Mr. Lennon.' He said the iconic words._

_'JOHN!!!' I screamed. But I was too late. The gunshots rang out and moments later he fell to the ground unable to stand on his own anymore. His wife was screaming bloody murder and my feet took me over faster than I'd ever ran. Yoko didn't seem to see me as I fell to my knees beside him. He was still breathing. Tears stung my eyes as I brushed the hair from his eyes._

_'John, John look at me.' I demanded._

_'Ashley?' He asked, recognizing me._

_'It's me. I'm here. Just hold on.'  I begged him. Sirens wailed in the distance and I took his hand._

_'Ashley...I'm sorry...' He said softly._

_'Sorry? What are you sorry for?' I cried._

_'For not being a better man. Your dad is going to grow up without a father. I tried to be better for him...I should've...' He stopped talking as he fell still, exhaling his last breath._

_'John? John...?! No!! No come back!!!' I screamed._

 

"Come back!!!" I screamed, sitting bolt upright. I was coated in a thin film of sweat and bordering on hyperventilating. I was back in the spare bedroom at the flat and it was dark out.

"What was that?" I whispered, running my hands through my hair. It was so vivid. So real. I was literally shaking it had scared me so. The beginning was bittersweet, but it had ended so terribly.

"What did he mean? When he said that he should've..." I wondered, swinging my injured ankle over the side of the bed. It preyed on my mind as I put on my dress again and fixed my hair up. The house was quiet which made me wonder if I was alone again.

"Oh, forget it. It was a bloody nightmare." I thought. But it did have a ring of truth to it. John would die in seventeen years. He'd never fully raise his son, he'd never finish recording his album, he'd never tour again and play music like he loved to do...he'd never witness his son marry my mom and he'd never meet me. I felt teary again as I left my room, headed for the piano. No one seemed to be home like I'd thought, so I limped to the piano and sat down. My fingers struck up a familiar tune. One that wouldn't be penned for a number of years by a great musician by the name of Billy Joel.

 

_It's nine o'clock on a Saturday_

_The regular crowd shuffles in_

_There's an old man sitting next to me_

_Making love to his tonic and gin_

_He says, "Son can you play me a memory_

_I'm not really sure how it goes_

_But it's sad and it's sweet_

_And I knew it complete_

_When I wore a younger man's clothes."_

_Sing us a song you're the piano man_

_Sing us a song tonight_

_Well we're all in the mood for a melody_

_And you've got us feeling alright_

 

My dad knew all the golden oldies and used to sing them to me when I had nightmares. Piano Man was one of them. And while he never sang the Beatles or John Lennon to me, Piano Man was always a favourite. My fingers danced across the keys.

 

_Now John at the bar is a friend of mine_

_He gets me my drinks for free_

_And he's quick with a joke or to light up your smoke_

_But there's someplace that he'd rather be_

_He says, "Bill, I believe this is killing me."_

_As a smile ran away from his face_

_"Well, I'm sure that I could be a movie star_

_If I could get out of this place."_

 

My voice rang out clear and I felt a little better

 

_Now Paul is a real estate novelist_

_Who never had time for a wife_

_And he's talking with Davy, who's still in the Navy_

_And probably will be for life_

_And the waitress is practicing politics_

_As the businessmen slowly get stoned_

_Yes, they're sharing a drink they call loneliness_

_But it's better than drinking alone_

_Sing us a song you're the piano man_

_Sing us a song tonight_

_Well we're all in the mood for a melody_

_And you've got us feeling alright._

I remembered when I learned this song on piano. It was tough but I was determined as I always was with anything. I wondered now if it was a family trait

 

_It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday_

_And the manager gives me a smile_

_'Because he knows that it's me they've been coming to see_

_To forget about life for a while_

_And the piano it sounds like a carnival_

_And the microphone smells like a beer_

_And they sit at the bar and put bread in my jar_

_And say, "Man what are you doing here?"_

_Sing us a song you're the piano man_

_Sing us a song tonight_

_Well we're all in the mood for a melody_

_And you've got us feeling alright...._

I played the ending chords feeling my mind and heart were at ease once again.

"I was wrong, miss Ashley. You're really good." A voice nearly scared the crap out of me. I jumped, whirling around to see JOHN IN THE DOORWAY.

"H-How long have you been there?" I asked, suddenly realizing him hearing Billy Joel was not a great idea.

"Since the second chorus. Well, I heard you shout earlier, wanted to come see what the fuss was about, next thing I know you're belting out a dandy of a tune. Where did you pick that up?" He said, casually leaning against the door-frame. Immediately my mind flew back to my dream and I suddenly wanted to grab him and hold him and never let him go. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Umm I... didn’t know anyone was here. I thought I was alone. I uh, had a nightmare. It's nothing major. Came out here and felt like singing." I said softly, still a little nervous of his calm demeanour.

"Paul was gonna stay but I made him go. I've been out all day I didn't mind staying in tonight. Are you okay?" He said.

"I'm okay." I lied. I really wasn't. Just seeing him after my dream sent chills down my spine. We were silent for a few minutes. The piano keys were suddenly the most interesting thing to me.

"Listen uh, Ashley I know I haven't exactly been...pleasant since you've gotten here. I apologized the other day for my behaviour, and I feel like I should again. The coffee trick was actually really...pretty funny." He said, chuckling a little toward the end. I blinked in amazement.

"Umm it's okay...I've got thick skin." I said with a small smile.

"No, I don't think you do. You're human just like the other lads. I'm just a cynical mindless asshole." He said with a frown.

"Oh, don't say that. You're just as human as the rest of us." I said, relaxing a little.

"Oh yeah? Then explain why I'm a constant jerk to you." He said, coming over and joining me on the piano bench.

"You just haven't found who you are and want to be yet." I said without really thinking. He looked at me kinda funny.

"Well that's a little philosophical." He teased. I smiled, looking for a recovery statement.

"It's...something my father used to say when I was little." I said which wasn't a lie.

"Well he sounds like a wise man." He mused.

"You have no idea." I thought to myself.

"Anyway, I'm sorry for today. The problem with me is I'm just gonna go back out and hurt you again." He said with a troubled look in his dark eyes.

"Hey, I'm a pretty forgiving person. As long as I know you'll apologize for anything you say or do, I can live with that." I said supportively. I needed to make a step forward with him again. My dream had made things all to clear. I wanted to and I had to know him. Before I wouldn't ever get the chance.

"Really? You'd do that? I don't want to be so sarcastic and passive aggressive all the time..." He trailed off.

"And you won't be. Trust me. If you want, I could help you." I offered, feeling like this was my big chance.

"Help me? To what behave?" He asked.

"In a way. I know you, John Lennon. You may not think it, but I know more about you than you think. If you'll let me, I can help." I said. He smiled.

"Alright Ashley. Deal." He said, extending his hand to me. I stared at it and then dove at him for a hug. It was an impulse reaction entirely. He was stunned at first but then tentatively hugged me back.

"Lesson one." I said with a light chuckle.

"I know how to hold a girl, Ashley." He chuckled back.

"But this is among friends. Friends starting over for the better." I smiled. Oh, how I hoped so.

 

 


	10. NINE

**NINE:**

I didn't last very long after that. The pain came back in my ankle and John insisted I go back to bed. He was being so nice to me after our little moment together and I was practically bursting inside with happiness. I hoped it lasted. My nightmare was fading in the back of my mind as I got into bed again. I heard the other three lads Come in briefly before I clocked out again. I didn't even need the pain pills. The next morning, I awoke to chattering coming from somewhere in the flat. Curious as to what was going on, I got up but quickly remembered I had hurt myself when I put weight on my bad ankle. I winced and gritted my teeth.

 "Right. That happened. Well I suppose this proves the fact that I'm not dreaming. I painstakingly got into a dress for the day and fixed my hair back into a high ponytail. I touched my cheek and noticed I was rather pale.

 "Well let's just take it easy then." I thought as I hobbled out of my room. I heard the lads chattering in the kitchen and headed in that direction.

 "Hey, there's Ashley." George said with a friendly smile. I waved and smiled weakly.

 "Hey guys." I said.

 "Oh, Ashley you look so uncomfortable." Paul said with outright sympathy in his beautiful eyes. John was sitting quietly just watching me and Ringo was busy reading the paper.

 "Oh, I'll be alright." I told him as I came up to the table. Paul pulled out a chair for me and I sat down gratefully.

 "Tell the truth, how are you feeling?" He prodded.

 "Umm, a little sorer than yesterday, but it's just a sprain. It's nothing." I tried to brush it off because I really didn't want to complain or be a burden. They all had busy lives after all.

 "Why don't you have some coffee? That might make you feel better." John suddenly suggested as he pushed a cup of the steaming liquid toward me. I smiled, feeling a little better even than just knowing he wasn't going to be nasty to me.

 "Yeah that sounds alright." I agreed before taking a drink of it. My face immediately puckered. It was so sweet!!

 "What did you do to this?" I demanded, half amused.

 "Oh, is it too bitter? Not enough sugar?" John joked, going for the sugar bowl again. I wallowed the sickening sweet liquid and rolled my eyes playfully. He'd gotten me.

 "John! That was mean, apologize." Paul said. I burst out laughing and John was relieved to see I wasn't sour at him, I think.

 "Paul don't worry about it. It's just a prank." I said lightheartedly as a gave John a playful punch in the arm. His eyes twinkled with amusement as the other three lads stared in amazement. This was unlike the John they knew, being folksy and friendly with a girl and not even having slept with her. Paul was concerned for me I think for that reason. But I didn't know or care at the time. I was finally friends with John, my grandfather and that made me the happiest.

 

 *********

 

 

Days passed where I was basically just cooped up around the house. Paul pitied me I think for not being able to accompany them places, but John insisted with him that what mattered most was getting me better. I didn't totally mind, I had a piano to myself and countless books...the most of which I discovered were very inappropriate for me to be reading probably and dad would probably ground me if he found me with one of these books, but no one was around, right? They also had a tv in the living room, though I wouldn't even know how to begin to operate it. So, I guess you could say by the time my ankle wrap came off, I was right crazy from cabin fever. The day the doctor said the wrap could come off, a hesitantly put weight on the ankle to find I had no more pain! Oh, how the lads were happy to hear that. Paul had actually gone out and purchased me firstly, a new coat that had lovely fur around the collar and low-heeled shoes to prevent a further 'accident' He was such a sweetie. That day when George asked if I wanted to go down to the studio and listen to them record the few last songs for their album, I nearly leapt out of the door! The air was brisk, and the wind had an ugly bite to it as we all climbed into the waiting car to take us across the city.

 "How does it feel to be un-caged?" John asked me with a sideways smirk.

 "Oh, it feels amazing. I was going completely bonkers in there." I smiled at him.

 "Would you look at that, eh?" I heard George mumble to Ringo.

 "Look at what?" I asked.

 "Oh nothing." George gave me an innocent smile. I had no idea what they meant so I just left it.

 

  **Paul's POV**

 I could see what was going on. Ashley liked John. For whatever crazy reason and even after he'd treated her so badly. She liked him. And now he was being kind to her... Were they in love? I felt just slightly crushed at the thought. I knew Ashley was from another timeline, I was the only one who knew her secret. And I loved her. I didn't care if she was from a world where I was an old man. She was immensely beautiful and had the spirit and fight of a champion. She was as stubborn as they came but that was so attractive to me. And seeing shed seemingly chosen John was heartbreaking.

"I could be so much better with her." I thought sadly.

 

**Ashley's POV**

Back at the studio. It still blew me away that I was actually there. After bantering a little with George and John on the way in, I noticed Paul hanging back looking a little bit like a kicked puppy. Curious, I hung back.

"Hey, what's got you so down?" I asked, touching his shoulder lightly.

"I'm not down." He said looking at me with his dark eyes.

"Well you seem like it." I prodded. I didn't know why I felt so folksy now. Maybe turning over a new leaf with John spurred something. Or maybe it was because I was realizing I wasn't getting home anytime soon.

"I'm fine, Ashley." He said, giving me a smile.

"Alright. Just keep smiling." I said kindly before running back up with George and John.

 

**Paul's POV**

Why did she toy with me? Couldn't she see that I was so in love with her?

 

*********

 

_If I fell in love with you_

_Would you promise to be true?_

_And help me understand_

_Cos I've been in love before_

_And I found that love was more_

_Than just holding hands_

I tapped my fingers along to the beat of the familiar song. It was absolutely exhilarating to see them in their element. And I felt a ton better now I was better. I was beaming from ear to ear as I watched each one of them.

 

_If I give my heart to you_

_I must be sure_

_From the very start_

_That you would love me more than her_

_If I trust in, you oh please_

_Don't run and hide_

_If I love you too oh please_

_Don't hurt my pride like her_

_Cos I couldn't stand the pain_

_And I would be sad if our new love was in vain_

_So, I hope you see that I_

_Would love to love you_

_And that she will cry_

_When she learns we are two?_

_Cos I couldn't stand the pain_

_And I would be sad if our new love was in vain_

I hummed along. They had no idea how big of a hit they were gonna be. Soon they'd be off to America and that would spurn full fledged Beatlemania.

"I wonder if I'll be here for that." I wondered.

 

_So, I hope you see that I_

_Would love to love you_

_And that she will cry_

_When she learns we are two?_

_If I fell in love with you...._

 

I applauded upon them finishing though I knew they couldn't hear me or see me.

"It's the thought that counts." I thought happily as George took mic for the next one. He was an odd character that George Harrison. I never really knew much about him as a fan. I knew the basics any Beatles fan knew, but I didn't really know as much about him as say John or Paul. He was a sweetie though. He was quiet, gentle and kind hearted. Not to mention he could sing great and knew his way around a guitar.

"It's so sad he died the way he did." I thought kind of sadly as he started playing another well-known song to me.

 

_Before this dance is through_

_I think I'll love you too_

_I'm so happy when you dance with me_

_I don't want to kiss or hold your hand_

_If it's funny try and understand_

_There is really nothing else I'd rather do_

_Cos I'm happy just to dance with you_

_I don't need to hug or hold you tight_

_I just want to dance with you all night_

_In this world there's nothing I would rather do_

_Cos I'm happy just to dance with you_

_Just to dance with you_

_It's everything I need_

_Before this dance is through_

_I think I'll love you too_

_I'm so happy when you dance with me_

_If somebody tries to take my place_

_Let's pretend we just can't see his face_

_In this world there's nothing I would rather do_

_Cos I'm happy just to dance with you_

_Just to dance with you_

_It's everything I need_

_Before this dance is through_

_I think I'll love you too_

_I'm so happy when you dance with me_

_If somebody tries to take my place_

_Let's pretend we just can't see his face_

_In this world there's nothing I would rather do_

_I've discovered I'm in love with you_

_Cos I'm happy just to dance with you..._

You could say I was happier than I'd been in a long while just watching them play. It was like watching a video, but it was real life. They played a few more songs to complete their album before coming out singing purposefully off key and laughing among themselves.

"Poor Ashley she's had to sit here and watch us work." George took pity on me.

"Oh no don't be sorry. It's amazing to watch you guys do what you do best." I said, my smile broadening. It was like a high for me I swear.

"Oh, miss Bunting you do flatter me." John said in a teasing high-pitched tone. I snorted.

"Oh, get over yourself _Johnny boy_." I teased back. At the corner of my eye I saw Paul looking like a kicked puppy again.

"What is his deal?" I wondered as I watched him light up a cigarette. I realized I was going to have to get used to the smell. Or stop them from smoking altogether. The first option seemed less of a hassle.

"Great work, lads. That's the final take on those. They'll be cut straight for the album." Mr. Epstein came into the room. The lads muttered something on reply as the remainder of them lit up.

"Well I wanted to tell you and to inform you about the gala tonight. You'll all be in attendance." He went on. The four collectively groaned.

"A gala? That'll just be awfully boring." Paul said.

"I wanted to go out tonight." John protested.

"What about Ashley?" Was George's question.

"Well she can come with us, right?" Ringo said, looking at their manager.

"If she behaves, I don't see why not." He shrugged. John looked at me with big eyes.

"You will behave?" He teased.

"Yes, yes I'll behave. Maybe I'll make it less painful on you whiny boys." I said, wagging my finger at them playfully. Mr. Epstein chuckled.

"Bless you, miss Ashley." He told me. I just smiled.

 

 

 

 

 


	11. TEN

**TEN:**

So, the lads seemed in much better spirits once it was decided that I would attend the gala with them. I didn't know if I'd like it at all, but I figured with them it would end up being fun. As the band finished up, I grew excited. Who wouldn't want to go to a party with them? My only worry was they'd drink the night away as young superstars they were.

"Oh, stop it. It'll be fun." I told myself. I needed to get used to the fact I was staying here for a while, for the unforeseeable future at least and I had to decide whether I was gonna be removed from their lives or help them along. Of course, I wanted to help them. My, the lads were chatty as we took the car back home. Discussing what to wear and what girls to look for and... other things I won't repeat. Maybe they thought I wasn't listening, but I sure was.

"They're young men. What else would they be thinking about?" I thought, hiding a blush.

"Ashley?" Someone's voice brought me out of my slight embarrassment.

"Hm?" I asked.

"You're okay with going right?" It was Paul.

"Yeah it'll be fine. I'm sure I'll keep myself occupied." I said, smoothing out my skirt and trying to not sound as awkward as I felt. I was slightly relieved when the car let us off.

"Now to find something to wear." I thought.

 

*******

 

It didn't take long for me to realize that I still only had the three dresses that Paul and I had got when I first arrived. They were day dresses...totally not acceptable to wear to a fancy party!

"What am I gonna do?" I thought, beginning to worry. I hadn't a cent to my name over there, and I sure as hell wasn't gonna hit Paul up for cash. I wasn't that type of girl.

"Hey, busy?" A knock came at my ajar door. I turned to see a sheepish looking George in the doorway.

"Oh. Hi George. No, I'm not busy." I said, putting a smile on my face.

"What's the matter?" He noticed anyway.

"Oh nothing. Just .I don't have anything nice to wear tonight." I shrugged.

"Well that won't do." He said, looking concerned.

"Don't worry about it. Maybe I'll just have to stay home." I shrugged sadly. I left the room, leaving him standing there. John and Paul were in the living room both reading some type of paper.

"Hey Ashley. What's new?" Paul asked.

"Since ten minutes ago, nothing." I said with a slight smile. Disappointment tugged in my gut, but I tried to not let it show. I hoped they weren't as good at reading emotion as George.

"Why don't you play something for us? We don't have to leave for a few hours." John suggested without looking up. Still, just him addressing me nicely was such an achievement for me.

"Sure." I said in a perky voice as I went to the piano. My fingers danced above the keys as I tried to think of something to play once again.

 

_Wise men say only fools rush in_

_but I can't help falling in love with you..._

 

**George's POV**

I felt bad for Ashley. She didn't have a nice dress to wear so immediately she gave up all hope of going. I couldn't see a girl unhappy, so I knew what I had to do.

"Hey. Come with me up town." I said, going to grab Ringo.

"Why? What's there?" He asked.

"I'm gonna get something lovely for Ashley to wear tonight." I said, feeling a blush creep up my neck. Ringo gave me a look.

"George Harrison, are you sweet on Miss Ashley?" He asked me. I looked away. Maybe I was. She was unlike any girl I'd ever met before. And so yes maybe I liked her.

"I just wanna do something nice for her." I shrugged. But Ringo knew better.

"You like her." He smirked, getting up to go with me. As we passed the living room where lovely piano music was coming from, I heard a lovely female voice.

 

_Shall I stay_

_would it be a sin?_

_If I can't help falling in love with you_

_Like a river flows surely to the sea_

_Darling so it goes_

_some things are meant to be_

_take my hand, take my whole life too_

_for I can't help falling in love with you..._

 

She was so beautiful and talented. I just wanted to make her happy.

 

_Like a river flows surely to the sea_

_Darling so it goes_

_some things are meant to be_

_take my hand, take my whole life too_

_for I can't help falling in love with you_

_for I can't help falling in love with you._

 

Smiling to myself, I left with Ringo to find her the best-looking dress money could buy.

 

**Ashley's POV**

"Again, I have to say, you are extremely talented." Paul complemented as I finished. I felt a little bit better but still sort of down in the dumps. I could go in a day dress and be publicly humiliated, there was that option.

"Have you said that?" I teased, going to join him on the couch.... rather closely. He looked a little surprised.

"Maybe...?" He said, turning a little pink. He was so shy it was adorable.

"Do you two need a moment alone?" John suddenly said in a sarcastic tone of voice. I realized Paul and I were staring at one another. I looked at John and saw his eyes twinkling with amusement.

"No… no we're fine." I said, clearing my throat. I didn't know what had exactly happened there. But somehow, I needed to walk it off.

"Umm I'm gonna go for a walk." I said, getting up.

"Okay, do you want me to come along?" Paul offered.

"Uh no, that's okay. I'll just go around the block. I won't be long." I said hurriedly, grabbing my coat and going out the door before he could answer. I closed the door and leaned my back against it. Something snapped inside of me during those five seconds. I had this funny feeling in the pit of my stomach.

"Just walk it off." I thought, putting on my coat and briskly walking toward the stairs.

 

**Paul's POV**

Ashley was puzzling. One moment she seemed to be throwing herself at John then the next she was staring deep into my soul. Did she have feelings for me? I did for her... Did she know? I tried to focus on what I was reading but my mind kept wandering. I couldn't get her piercing blue eyes out of my head. I hoped maybe to dance with her tonight. Then maybe we'd finally get the attachment I was looking for.

 

**Ashley's POV**

"I can _**not** _be falling in love with him!! He's Sienna's grandfather for God's sake!! .... And John is mine... God this is so messed up.." I thought just pacing around the block having a minor freak out. The pit in my gut I never felt before. Paul couldn't be my first love. How would I ever explain that to my kids one day? 'Who was your first love mommy?' And I'd be like well... An old man...

"Ashley pull yourself together! Just forget about it. It was a moment, it's over just moves on." I told myself, jamming my hands into my pockets. I couldn't be one of those girls who lets herself fall in love with the first guy who shows her any attention. After about an hour and a half of circling the block, not willing myself to go back inside the building, I decided it was time so I squared my shoulders and marched back up with so much confidence to remain strong and not let my heart be taken and screw up the timeline of history. The living room was empty when I got back, and I wondered if Paul and/or John had gone out looking for me. I wanted to call out and say I had returned, but I decided not to. I just removed my coat and quietly walked toward my room. My door was open, and it was usually closed. Someone had been in there. Curious, I stepped inside. Everything seemed in its place, which puzzled me more. Sighing, I pulled open my closet door again, to see if any of my old outfits looked appealing this time. To my utter surprise, there was this lovely red dress with a v neck and short sleeves. The skirt flared like the style and oh it was beautiful! Immediately though, I wondered

"Did Paul pick this up?" It seemed possibly likely after the little thing that happened. I took the dress out of the closet and noticed there was a little note taped to it.

"You'll look beautiful tonight." It read. No signature, and I sure couldn't determine who wrote it, I wasn't good at stuff like that. I knew Paul was left handed though and they wrote differently than right handed people. Mum was left handed so that's how I knew. This looked right handed though.

"So, it's not him..." I thought, puzzled. Would John have done this? He didn't know I didn't have a dress and come to think of it, neither did Paul...the only one who knew was...

"George??" I thought. He'd gotten me this lovely dress? I suddenly heard talking so I stuffed the dress back into the closet until it was time to get ready and left the room.

"Hey there she is. Where've you been?" Ringo saw me.

"Oh nowhere. I just went for a walk." I said as George came up behind him. I felt my heart in my throat. I wanted to thank him, but something told me not to right then.

"Are you gonna get ready? We have to leave soon." George spoke up.

"Umm yeah I was gonna get freshened up. Is anyone in the bathroom?" I asked, feeling slightly nervous. That dress must've cost a fortune. Why would George do something so sweet and kind? And to me, a basic stranger.

"It's free. We're all just getting ready. It's all yours." George smiled. I noticed Ringo was giving his friend little subtle glances that confused me. But I pushed them aside and headed toward the bathroom. A hot shower felt nice on my cold skin and it gave me time to think.

"He probably was just being his sweet self." I reasoned. George was a kind-hearted soul. The baby of the group, and I always admired him as a man and musician. He was just a big sweetie, but I didn't really know if I'd be able to reciprocate any feelings he maybe had towards me. With Paul it sort of came naturally but I had to realize that I absolutely could not do that. I let out a huge sigh.

"Just let things happen." I decided. I couldn't end up with Paul obviously because Sienna might not exist back home if I just so much as kissed him. But that didn't mean George was hands off. I didn't know. As I dried off and wrapped the towel tightly around my body, I just wanted to get into that dress and go with it. This overthinking business was giving me a headache. I looked around as I opened the bathroom door to make sure the coast was clear before I scurried down to my room. I didn't want any boys seeing me just in a towel! I closed my door once inside and made sure it was all the way before I started getting ready. The dress went on easily and it fit me to a tee which was so weird because how would George have known my dress size. Shrugging, I did up the back and gave a twirl in front of my mirror. It was really pretty. On my feet I decided to do the heels again just for that night. They gave me a little more height and I liked it. I then tackled my wet hair, wanting to do something fancy with it but I didn't have any hair products. I opened my empty top drawer though to see it was full of hair products and makeup!

"Oh George..." I thought with a smile. He really had thought of everything, the dear. So, I was able to do what I wanted. I wove my hair into two braids and placed them on my head like a crown. I wished I had a necklace to wear, I came back in time with simple faux diamond studs in my ears that would have to do. But a necklace would've looked amazing. From what I could see I didn't see any had come with the dress, so I just left it. I looked pretty good otherwise. I did my makeup too, painted my eyes up and my lips a crimson colour to match the dress. I barely recognized myself. I looked like I totally belonged in that era. Taking a breath and smoothing my skirt, I exited my room and went to the living room where I heard chatter. It all stopped when I walked in. The boys looked handsome in their nice suits, but all four pairs of eyes were on me.

"Too flashy?" I asked.

"Ashley...where did you get that...you look amazing." Paul said in a stunned daze.

"I'm not sure. It was in my closet when I came back from my walk." I said innocently.

"Well you look incredible." John even complimented, looking genuinely blown away.

"Thanks. I think it'll do." I smiled. Ringo gave George a knowing look and I knew.

"You really do look beautiful, Ashley." George said sheepishly. Beautiful. I was beautiful.

 

 


	12. ELEVEN

**ELEVEN:**

I tell you I was most grateful for my coat against the crisp evening air as the lads and I headed out to our waiting car. They were chatty once again whereas I was still stuck in my daze that George had done so much for me in the span of a few hours, so I'd feel dolled up to come out that night. I felt somehow like I owed him a dance or a kiss or something. But I felt stuck. Paul couldn't stop looking at me, I didn't know what he was thinking...half of me didn't want to know. He was so pretty though for a guy. With his tousled dark hair, soft, almost puppy like hazel eyes and pink lips there was no lie when they said he was the 'cute Beatle.' But in my opinion, they were all 'cute' or attractive in their own way. Paul was definitely the puppy dog cute, where George was more the shy cute, the sweetheart, kind and lovable one. Ringo was generous and sweet and with those blue eyes he was ultimately a lady killer in his own way. Now John...my dear John. To me it felt odd looking at him from a romantic angle...now at least. I used to daydream about him all the time before I knew the truth. He was proud. Proud and confident which most girls maybe in that era would like but back in my time girls might consider him to be a bit of a jackass or a troublemaker/bad boy. But as I'd started to see, he had a soft side. A soft side that was light and fun. Looks wise he was amazingly attractive. I was really kinda disappointed looking at him then that I hadn't inherited his gorgeous dark eyes. I had my mums’ eyes, unfortunately. He had this smirk when he was being jokey that I loved. So, they were all around pretty great looking. And no wonder. They were the biggest hit since Elvis Presley.

"Are you ready to shine?" A voice brought me out of my thoughts. I looked to see it was Paul. I should've guessed. I felt a blush creep up my neck.

"Just let it go. Be nice." I thought.

"I suppose so." I replied with a smile as I slid out of the car. The walkway was icy though, so I lost my footing!!

"If I hurt myself again..." I thought in that split second. But someone caught me as I fell backward. I looked up into warm brown eyes.

"I guess you fell for me." It was George with a sheepish grin. I had to laugh.

"That's your best pickup line?" I teased him. He looked a little hurt though and I thought maybe he took me seriously. I stood and smoothed my skirt.

"I'm kidding, George. Yes, I did fall for you." I said, gently leaning to kiss his cheek as a thank you for not letting my crack my noggin off the pavement. He looked at me with that goofy smile again.

"Ashley! Are you okay?" Paul came rushing once he heard what happened.

"I'm fine. George caught me." I assured the overprotective young man.

"She fell for him." Ringo joked as he'd seen the whole thing. I looked at the guy who'd done so much for me that day in admiration and that feeling was back. But for a different one. Would I allow it?

"Maybe for tonight." I thought as I walked inside.

 

********

 

We actually had dinner there which was nice. The place was full of a bunch of music mucky mucks looking for up and coming stars to sign and whatnot. For the lads it was just a night out though. They already had won first prize in that department.

"Are you performing tonight?" I asked later on just out of curiosity. John laughed.

"Hell no. This place is too posh for people like us." He said with a wink.

"Well alright then. I guess it's too fine and rich for you, is it Mr. Lennon?" I smiled.

"Oh no it's not like that, once I got on stage, they'd kick me out for an indecency of some kind. Y'know most of these folks don't like us. They think we ruin the image of music." He explained quite straightforwardly.

"Well then they're way off because I think your music is wonderful." I said genuinely.

"And that's why we like you, Miss Ashley." He said, patting my shoulder. I felt a thrill go through me. Another point for team friendship. He'd been so great, and I loved it! As he wandered off someplace, and Paul had vanished too, I was left with George and Ringo.

"So, Ashley have you been to a place like this before?" Ringo asked me as I watched all the fine and rich folk wander around with champagne and chiffon gowns. I had in the past, dad had company parties every year mother and I always went to, mind you the fashion was much more modern.

"I have...My father..." I trailed off wondering how I could rework my story.

"Um, he introduced me to a few fancy parties over the years. Special occasions, you know." I said as I noticed George wandering off as well. Had I bored him? I did want to spend the evening with him intentionally. But now I was only left with Ringo. I wasn't complaining, he was good company but still...

"You know, he really likes you." Ringo said out of the blue.

"I'm sorry?" I did a double take.

"George. He's taken a real fancy to you since you got here. He kept wondering if you were somehow Paul's girl." He said. I was stunned. George WAS sweet on me?

"Uh, no I'm not Paul's girlfriend I um… I've just known him for a while." I said. Not actually a lie, not actually the truth either.

"Well he'll be glad to hear that. See me, I thought you had a thing for John once you softened him up." He said openly. I half laughed.

"I... I can assure you that's a vastly different arrangement. We're just friends." I said.

"And what about me?" He asked.

"We can be friends too. Right?" I smiled.

"Of course." He smiled back just as George returned.

"What did I miss?" He asked me mainly.

"Oh nothing. Just chatting. Where did you run off to?" I asked.

"Oh nowhere. Um...listen Ashley...would it be too forward to ask if I could dance with you?" He suggested, going a little bit red. I chuckled.

"Of course not." I smiled. Music had come on and couples were flooding to the dance floor, mostly middle-aged married ones. Ringo looked at us.

"Go on you two. I'll be around." He nodded, with a casual wave.

"Well what are we waiting for?" I wondered.

"Well...I was thinking I'd buy you a drink first."

".... I’m seventeen." I answered, kind of stupidly.

"Is that supposed to mean something?" He was puzzled. Well I guess not; I wasn't far from eighteen after all.

"Um… no sorry just a family rule but sure I can have a drink." I shrugged. I figured one wouldn't kill me. So, he led me over to the open bar.

"Do you know when I saw that dress, I knew it was for you?" George suddenly asked, as we got our drinks. Mine was a red concoction of something. It matched my dress.

"I figured it was you. You were the only one who knew I didn't have a proper dress...thank you."

"Oh, it was nothing. You were unhappy. And I don't like seeing you unhappy." 

"Well aren't you a sweetheart." I smiled as I took a sip of my drink. It was really fruity. We talked a little bit; George really didn't seem to have much to say at the time. I think and know now that he was waiting for something. I was happy just sitting with him. I kept hearing Ringo's words. _'He's taken a real fancy to you since you got here'._ Paul may have had puppy dog love for me but knowing George was sweet on me meant it was probably the real deal. It made me all fluttery inside. Suddenly, the song ended and a new one began. One with a very familiar tune.

"Shall we dance?" George then asked me as he offered his hand. It was the very song I'd played the day before. Had he heard me playing? Speechless, I followed him to the dance floor.

 

_Wise men say only fools rush in_

_but I can't help falling in love with you_

"This song...I played it yesterday." I realized, as I started swaying to the music.

"I know. I heard you." Was his reply, as we danced together.

"Did you request it?" I wondered, just having my thoughts confirmed.

"I did. You have a lovely talent Ashley. And I do love this song." He replied. Gosh he was sweet.

 

_Shall I stay_

_would it be a sin?_

_If I can't help falling in love with you_

_Like a river flows surely to the sea_

_Darling so it goes_

_some things are meant to be_

_take my hand, take my whole life too_

_for I can't help falling in love with you..._

 

George was a lovely dancer. I felt like I was floating on air. As the song ended, I felt on top of the world. And then the most shockingly amazing thing happened. I got my first kiss. Not from Paul but George Harrison.

_For I can't help falling in love with you._

 

**John's POV**

I was extremely bored that night. It wasn't my type of crowd at all. If I hadn't been 'expected' to show my face I wouldn't have gone at all. Sure, there were some girls but most were too good or too high and mighty to look twice at a guy like me. Besides, girls weren't on my agenda as of late. Well one girl was. Ashley. She was so different. So... interestingly beautiful. I never opened up to a girl like I did her unless we'd become...rather close. And I'd never think of doing that to Ashley. I'd never be that way with her. She was a certain kind of special that required a gentle touch and respect. I admired that about her because not many girls I'd come in contact with had as much self worth and appreciation for who she is that I saw radiating off that girl every day.

"But I can never have her. She'll never see me that way. She's got Paul to fawn over after all." The thought played across my mind all night. I kept looking for her though because I did enjoy talking to her now that she'd cracked through my shell. I trusted her like I'd never trusted anyone before in my life. I felt I could tell her my deepest darkest secrets and they'd be safe with her. I finally found her though. Where? On the dance floor kissing George. My heart took a little dip. Of course, she'd never notice me that way. I wasn't sure whether I'd be okay with that. I wasn't sure of much at that moment.

**Ashley's POV**

I felt like a queen. Never in my life had I been kissed and to be kissed by George; who was not only a world-famous musician and 1/4 of the biggest band in history but he was also just a shy young man looking for love. And knowing I could be part of that was somehow rewarding. I knew I'd never feel the same way about Paul. I couldn't interfere with Sienna's existence though deep down I wondered if I already had. I faintly wondered if kissing George would interfere with his son Dhani's existence but most of me didn't really care. George had just kissed me. I was at a fancy party dancing to Elvis Presley in 1963 in a red dress. I was living a dream.

 

 

 


	13. TWELVE

**TWELVE:**

 

 The night was all a blur after that. I felt like I was in seventh heaven as one thought just kept racing through my mind.

 "George kissed me. I kissed George Harrison! I couldn't get over that and it was making me feel super giddy. Or maybe it was the fact that I had two more of those colourful drinks from the bar. Regardless, I was flying high even when we all finally left for the night. I can't remember what the topic of conversation was on the ride home, I was wrapped up in my own little daydream world. When we got home, the other three lads went on ahead where George hung back with me. I remember our conversation.

 "Are you alright, Ashley? You seem quiet." He asked.

 "Oh, I'm fine. Just thinking about how wonderful our night was. Thank you." I smiled. He blushed slightly.

 "Oh, don't worry about it. It was the least I could do for a pretty girl like yourself." He replied. He was so cute when he was trying to be even semi romantic. We climbed the stairs together, me just replaying our dance over and over in my head.

 "It's been a very long time since I felt as special as I felt tonight." I remarked.

 "You've said. I guess things aren't so great for you at home?" He said. Instantly, my happiness and daydreams crashed down to earth again as thoughts of my argument with my parents returned to my mind. And that I was decades before my timeline.

 "Um...yeah. They could be better." My voice got soft.

 "Oh, I've upset you, I'm sorry." George quickly apologized as we reached our floor.

 "Oh no, don't apologize. I'm fine." I assured him, putting a smile on my face. I offered my hand to him to try and make myself feel better. He took my hand in his and I did feel a small sense of relief overtake me.

 "Well, whatever is going on at home, I hope it gets better. No one should have to suffer." George added, sweetly as we approached the door. I felt tears jump to my eyes at that. George was always the peace loving one even from the beginning. I couldn't help thinking how much he'd accomplish in his life. How many lives he would touch, only for his own precious life to be cut short too early. I couldn't help it. I threw my arms around the poor unsuspecting young man and held him tightly.

 "Hey, I upset you again, I'm so sorry. It'll be okay." He tutted, hugging me back. I felt tears spill down the bridge of my nose.

 "It'll be okay." I repeated, trying to dry my eyes. I let him go finally. He gave me a lopsided smile.

"Gonna be alright?" He asked. I nodded.

"Yeah. Yeah, sorry I'm not usually this emotional." I apologized.

"Hey, everyone has their moments." Was his kind hearted answer. We finally went inside the flat and it was quiet. The other lads had probably high tailed it off to bed. Regardless, it was kind of nice to feel like we had the place to ourselves. George very gentlemanly removed my coat for me and hung it on the peg.

"Well I guess I'll call it a night. Morning comes early around here I find." I smiled, tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. He nodded.

"Sure thing. I had a wonderful evening with you." He answered, getting that shy look back on his face.

"And I you. Goodnight George." I smiled. And then I got my second kiss that very moment. There was a little more pressure on my lips than the last one, but I didn't mind.

"Goodnight." He said in parting as with my heart thumping hard against my rib cage I headed off to my room. I closed the door softly and leaned back against it. Brushing my fingers over my lips gently, I couldn't help but smile. I didn't know what was happening, but I knew I liked it.

 

******

 

As I predicted, the next morning did come early as the lads were required down at the studio for a meeting with their manager. I was awoken by the sound of the four of them bustling around the flat and knocking stuff over in their rush followed by some rather choice swear words. I quickly combed my hair back and put on a dress for the day before going out to see for myself what all the fuss was about. The lads were in the kitchen all stuffing their faces in a hurry.

"Where's the fire?" I remarked with a smile.

"We're late. Epstein is gonna have our heads." John filled me in quickly as he got up and shoved a bowl of cereal into my hands.

"How late?" I asked, trying to hurry myself along. I as much as the next person didn't want them to be late for their prior engagements.

"About an hour. Let's go." Paul replied, hurriedly as he grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair.

"An hour!? Why didn't anyone wake me sooner?" I cried, dropping the cereal into the sink and high tailing it after the lads.

"We overslept!" Ringo called over his shoulder. Poor guys. I hoped their manager wouldn't be too hard on them because after all, he had been the one who had wanted them to attend the party the night before. Running down the stairs wasn't a picnic in dress shoes, but I had to keep up with the lads. I found myself limping down the stairs. Suddenly someone took my hand and was leading me down. I looked up to meet familiar dark eyes.

"Thanks George." I felt my heart flutter with admiration for him. There was a car waiting for us like usual, and we dove into it. It took off speeding down the busy streets even before the door was closed. The four lads, finally able to relax a little, leaned back in their seats. I couldn't help but chuckle.

"Guess that's the last time you lads stay out partying so late, eh?" I teased.

"Oh, come off it, it's hardly our fault. We didn't wanna go in the first place." John replied, a little bit of bite to his voice which kind of threw me off.

"I-I was joking with you, John. Too early?" I said, trying to keep my voice light. He just smirked at me.

"I'm thinkin it's too early for you, miss Ashley." He replied and I knew he was just being his smart ass self. I just smiled in return. George, beside me suddenly tapped my shoulder like a small child vying for his mother’s attention.

"Yes, George?" I smiled at him.

"Um...I wanted to ask you something but...it can wait." He said a little bit shyly, his brown eyes darting to the other members of the car who all of a sudden had their eyes on George and me.

"Oh...okay." I answered, wondering what had just happened. I watched as Ringo whispered something into Paul's ear and his cheeks went scarlet. What had he said??

"Hey George, tell me was Ashley everything you hoped last night?" John spoke up with an evil glint in his eyes. I knew he was only kidding around but that was a bit much. George looked like he'd just been told to shut up.

"I-I don't know what you mean..." He muttered.

"Nothing happened last night of that's what you three are implying." I remarked, rather sternly. I wasn't pleased with their implications.

"Whatever time I spent alone with George last night is my business and let's leave it at that." I snapped as I saw them still looking violently amused. John whistled through his teeth.

"Testy aren't we, miss Ashley?" He pushed. I growled under my breath. He was diverting back to the John Lennon he was when I first arrived. I knew now to just take it and he hardly meant anything by it, but I was getting pissed off as the car stopped at the studio finally. Steaming, I threw the door open and stormed out and up the steps inside.

"Miss Ashley! Was wondering when you'd show up with your ducklings." Mr. Epstein teased.

"Please excuse me." I spoke rather harshly, as I blew past him and made a bee line for the restrooms. Once inside the ladies’ room, I leaned against the sink.

"Why are you letting them get to you? They're just guys being stupid because you had the most magical night of your life with George who you never imagined would in a million years be remotely interested in you and... oh my god..." I thought, just feeling frustrated beyond belief. I was happy since I got here, like genuinely and deeply happy and they had to wreck it. I could see John’s devilish smirk in my head and wanted to smack it off his face. Paul's scarlet cheeks...he knew now, obviously. And I couldn't help thinking what he was thinking.

"I don't want this to turn into a mess..." I thought.

"This isn't why you're here." Part of me said. It's true, my purpose being here was most definitely not falling in love with George Harrison, but it was happening regardless. No, I knew in my heart my reason for being here was to know my grandfather, the smart-ass John Lennon before I'd never get to, on account of a horrible man in approximately 20 years time. I let out a deep breath and looked at my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks were pink with adrenaline and my heart was pumping just thinking about everything.

"Ashley? Ashley are you in there?" I heard George's voice on the other side of the restroom door.

"Yeah...give me a minute." I called back after a moment. No doubt he knew I was upset. Willing myself to move, I walked to the door and exited. George was waiting with concern in his dark eyes.

"I'm fine." I assured, raising my hands before he had the chance to ask.

"You don't look fine. Don't let them get to you. They're just like that sometimes." He shrugged.

"Yeah well they shouldn't be. It's not their concern." I huffed. He nodded.

"I know. I'm sorry for their behavior." He apologized. Oh my God, he was too sweet, offering to apologize for the actions of three other people.

"You don't need to apologize. But thank you." I sighed.

"Well, it's unlikely that they will so I saved you the trouble. Anyway, if you're up to it we should go. We're late enough already." He smiled. I let one creep onto my lips as well as I followed him.

 

********

 

The tension was so thick when we reached our destination which was a sort of conference room of sorts. 3/4ths of the band were already smoking and the odor of the room was absolutely choking. As well as the lads, Mr. Epstein was in there as well as another man who I recognized from old footage as George Martin _(and if you don't know who that is from the name then educate yourself)_ and two other men I'd never seen before in my life. To best describe my situation and how I was feeling would be to say I felt like I on display somehow. George gestured for me to sit next to him and I sat without a word to the other Beatles.

"Well, now that George had joined us and... Miss Bunting, I suppose we should get started. We've kept these poor gentlemen waiting long enough. I assume this will not become a pattern." Mr. Epstein said to his clients. John just rolled his eyes and twirled his cigarette between his fingers. I knew what he was thinking. The one man stood.

"The reason I've asked for this meeting today with you is to discuss something very important. It's been decided that at the beginning of the next month, you lads will head for the United States of America." He said. The excitement erupted in those four lads almost immediately. Somehow, I knew deep down that this would happen that morning. History was continuing on its course. That thought made me feel better.

"America. They're going to America for the first time. And I'm here to witness it." I thought.

 

 


	14. THIRTEEN

**THIRTEEN:**

The energy levels were high even as the meeting concluded. Well they would be! The lads were heading to America for the first time in any of their lives and as an increasingly popular band. I seemed to almost forget how cross I was at John, Paul and Ringo as we left all of us, including me in high spirits.

 "America! We're going to America!" Paul hooted excitedly. I had to chuckle at his enthusiasm.

 "Woah, woah wait!" George called, over the other lads hooting and hollering.

 "What about Ashley?" He asked.

 "What about her?" Paul returned, still giddy with excitement. It then dawned on me. I hadn't been formally included in the travel plans.

 "She's staying here with you, is she supposed to go back home or is she coming with us?" George asked, looking a little forlorn. The lads paused.

 "Well she has to come with us. We've gone this far..." Ringo assumed.

 "It's...it's no trouble, really. I wouldn't belong there." I spoke up, trying to make the situation better. I really did want to come along though.

 "No, no you...you're coming with us just hang on. John, come with me." Paul decided, taking matters into his own hands. With John following him back into the building, I was left with George and Ringo.

 "Listen, both of you, I think I owe you an apology for my behavior earlier." Ringo out of the blue spoke.

 "Oh...don't worry about it. We've long forgotten, right Ashley?" George nodded to me.

 "Yeah...yeah it's fine." I smiled.

 "Good. It's not my business or Paul's or John's what you two did last night. You had a nice time and that's all that matters." He answered, sweetly. I smiled wider.

 "Thanks Ringo." Now if only John and Paul didn't have egos the size of the Empire State Building...

 "Let it go." I thought to myself. About ten minutes later, Paul and John came back out. I stood from the bench nearby, anxious to hear what had been decided.

 "So?" I asked, following George and Ringo over.

 "Pack your bags, Miss Ashley." John winked. Seemingly his laid-back demeanor had returned.

 "You're on the flight to America with us." Paul added. I don't know what got into me, but I squealed and jumped up and down with delight. The lads were quite amused.

 

********

 

Things were in an absolute tizzy preparing for our departure on the 6th of February. It really didn't take long for me to pack, but one blustery day, Paul came into my room.

 "Hey what's up?" I smiled at the familiar face.

 "C'mon and get your coat." 

 "I'm sorry?" I inquired. I was still a tad timid about our little 'moment' there a while back.

 "I'm not letting you go to America without having some new things to wear." He explained, with a small smirk. I froze.

 "Paul...you've done so much for me already. I'm fine with what I have." I chuckled. These guys really had to stop buying me clothes!

 "Nonsense, you're going to America! You need to look your finest...not that you don't look you're finest all the time...it's just..." Paul started getting a little bit tongue tied. Deciding to agree to his plans before he burst on me, I laughed and stood up.

 "I'll come then." I agreed, patting his shoulder lightly as I walked past.

 "Hey Ashley, where are you off to?" George wondered, running into me in the hallway.

 "Oh, Paul wants to take me shopping before we head overseas." I answered him.

 "Oh...I was hoping maybe...if you wanted to like go out tonight?" He asked, getting sheepish again.

 "Yeah we could do that. I promise I won't be terribly long." I smiled at those dark eyes.

 "Okay, yeah um, I'll see you then." He nodded, looking mighty pleased. I dropped my eyes and continued to smile at him. I was gonna go out on a date with George Harrison later! This stuff only happened to me in my dreams!

 "And I'm pretty sure this isn't a dream anymore." I thought. I looked around to make sure we were alone in the hallway before kissing him briefly. He looked surprised at first but warmed up to it a split second later.

 "Bye." I murmured softly, before heading towards the door to wait for Paul.

 

 

**Paul's POV**

 I knew that George was sweet on Ashley. The night of the gala, I saw how he doted on her. I was jealous I have to say, but I was rather hoping Ashley didn't feel the same about him. Ringo teased me the day we found out about our trip to America, but I took it just as that, a tease. I never thought in a million years that Ashley would fall for George, the quiet and awkward guitar player. In my room, I made sure I had my wallet as well as my jacket before heading out to the door to meet Ashley. I wanted to take her out to shop, yes but to talk as well. I needed to tell her how I really felt about her. I exited my room and made a beeline for the front door but stopped when I saw George and Ashley ahead. Neither saw me and I ducked into Ashley's room.

 "Okay, yeah, um I'll see you then." I heard George say. I peeked my head out and my heart almost shattered when I saw Ashley kiss him.

 "Bye." She said softly to him before they parted ways. I ducked back inside as George passed, whistling a happy tune.

 "She loves him. She doesn't love you." The thought hit my heart like an axe.

 "Hey Paul, where are you?" I heard Ashley then call through the house. I took a deep breath and tried to pull myself together.

 "Coming." I answered.

 

 

**Ashley's POV**

 I do have to admit that I was slightly gladder than anything else that Paul had offered to take me clothes shopping again. When I went the first time, I was shopping for just a week maybe. But a new month was beginning, and I was still here. While that mostly frightened the hell out of me, not knowing if and when I'd see my family again, the other part of me was thrilled. I mean I had friends in well the biggest band in history, I was in love for God's sake!

 "You're quiet." I said to Paul after a while. We'd hit a strip where there were several girly shops. Paul was the only guy I knew who willingly would go into one. Probably because he was a princess himself, am I right? He looked at me.

 "Huh? What? Sorry, I'm just distracted." He replied, in a sort of blunt tone. That threw me off.

 "Paul...is everything okay?" I inquired, slightly worried. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and he did too. He sighed.

 "Yes. I'm sorry, that was rude of me." There was the Paul I knew.

 "Alright, just making sure. I haven't upset you, have I?" He shook his head.

 "No, not at all. Now, let's get you all set for the trip, shall we?" He smiled. So, I left it as we started.

 

 

********

 

 

Well by the time we were all said and done, I had maybe six different bags. Paul didn't hold anything back in price. Whatever looked nice he said absolutely to. So, I got a few skirt and blouse combos, a few more dresses and much more comfortable shoes that I was wearing out of the store actually because my other shoes were starting to form blisters on my poor feet. After our escapade, Paul suggested we go for something to eat as sort of a late lunch. We found a nice deli and I just had a coffee and sandwich.

"So, tell me more about Sienna." Paul said out of the blue. I almost choked on my coffee.

"Sienna...?" I inquired.

"Yeah. Your friend. The name just stuck in my head." He smiled.

"Umm, well there's not much to tell except we've been friends since she moved into my neighborhood, she introduced me to you guys' music and... we’ve been inseparable ever since." I said, feeling a little homesick.

"Hmm, what's she look like?" He asked.

"Like you." I almost told him. It was true, Sienna took very much after the McCartney side of the family.

"Um, she's got brown eyes, dark brown, kinda curly hair and she's...a little taller than me." I replied instead.

"She takes after her...mom's side of the family." I added kind of awkwardly. He just nodded silently.

"And who do you take after?" My goodness he was curious!

"My...dad's side. Unfortunately, that makes me look kind of masculine in some ways. Dad was an only child, so I take after him and his fath..." I trailed off.

"His father?" Paul finished. I nodded silently, realizing maybe I should shut up.

"So, your grandparents, your father's parents...do you see them?" The questions just kept on coming.

"Um...no, no I don't ....my grandmother I never met and my grandfather died.... a long time ago." I swirled my coffee.

 "Oh, that's a shame." Paul sympathized. I felt tears welling in my eyes. It was incredibly hard to not blurt out _'John is my grandfather and he's gonna die in 17 years!_ ' I could see my father's eyes when I found out that John was my grandfather. That I'd been lied to for my entire life. The anger, the grief in his eyes. He was five years old when John died and to have such a negative outlook of his father from very few memories, enough to hide his child from the truth of her lineage seemed absolutely ridiculous.

 "Excuse me..." I whispered, my emotions reaching a paramount. I stood up and as did Paul.

 "Are you alright, Ashley?" He asked with concern evident in his hazel eyes.

 "I-I'm fine...I'll be back..." I stammered before hurrying to the back to where I saw a sign for a restroom coming into the place. I didn't even look back as I basically ran to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall.

"Pull it together Ashley." I told myself. I hadn't gotten this panicked or upset in quite a while. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to blot out all the horrible thoughts.

"Pull yourself together, Ash!" I heard Sienna's voice in my head.

"I'm sorry...I just can't do this." I cried aloud, in tears. I couldn't be here when back home my entire life as I knew it was falling apart. I still didn't even know if I forgave my parents for lying to me.

"You can do this. Just be Ashley." My dad's voice. Whenever I was in distress those were his words of wisdom. Just be Ashley. Just be yourself. It'll all work out in the end. Oh, how he sounded so much like his own father.

"I miss you, dad." I thought as tears poured from my eyes. But I was stuck here. Stuck with the biggest band in world history, with my own grandfather who didn't and would never know who I really was. The man who would be shot to death in just a few short years.

"What am I supposed to do? Follow him around until that night to prevent him dying?" I thought. Seemed kind of selfish, saving his life for my own benefit. But would I? When he died, millions of fans mourned him other than his wife and son. If I saved his life, I'd be changing the course of history yes, but to save the life of a legend, it seemed worth it.

"But how? Stop talking foolish, Ashley." I told myself. I was in 1963. John was young, naive, just starting to get ragingly popular with his three other mates...He wouldn't face the gunman until many years later, after many accomplishments in his short life. I didn't know what to do but stand there with my back to the stall door.

"Ashley?" I suddenly heard a voice followed by a brisk knock at the bathroom door.

"I'm fine!" I called in a stronger voice than I felt like.

"Alright...just making sure." He replied. He was sweet. I took a few deep breaths.

"Everything's fine. You have a date tonight; you're going to America with the lads for goodness sake. It's going to be okay." I thought. Exiting the stall, I faced the mirror. My face looked terrible. Mascara running down my face, red blotches all over...I had to clean myself up. Wetting paper towel, I dabbed away the smears and tried to make the blotches go away. I really didn't want Paul to know that I had been crying. After about ten minutes, I got a pretty good harness on my emotions and exited the bathroom.

"There you are. What happened?" Paul asked.

"Nothing, I just took a moment. We should probably get home." I suggested, remembering my date again. He nodded.

"Sure. Let's get going then." He agreed as we paid and left the deli, heading back home.

 

 

 

 


	15. FOURTEEN

**FOURTEEN:**

I have to say I was in better spirits as Paul and I returned home. I wondered if he'd noticed. I was already picking out what I was going to wear out with George that night by the time we got to our floor.

"So... plans tonight?" He suddenly asked.

"Um, yeah. George and I are…going somewhere." I responded, pausing slightly. No one really knew for sure that George and I were technically 'dating' if you will, I sort of wanted to keep it that way.

"Ah." Was all he said, and I suddenly wondered

"Is he jealous?" I hoped not, that wouldn't go over well. I'd already had one upset today, I didn't want another, so I just said

"Yeah, we won't be late I'm sure." Before entering the flat. Ringo and John were lounging in the living room, but George was nowhere in sight. It was growing a little bit dark out too.

"Hey guys. Where's George at?" I asked right off the bat, just eager to spend some time alone with him.

"Oh, he went out a few hours ago. Did you need him?" Ringo asked.

"Well um, yeah. He promised to take me somewhere tonight." I decided to share.

"Ooh does Miss Ashley have a date?" John asked with a goofy look. I rolled my eyes playfully as Paul went past me to the couch.

"Not necessarily..." I trailed off as just then George came through the door, drunk as all else with **another girl!**

"Ashley! Meet Joyce." He slurred at me. I felt like I'd been drenched with a bucket of ice-cold water. Everything seemed to move in slow motion after that. Ringo got up to tend to George and the...other girl. I felt sick.

"You stupid girl! Why did you even let yourself open up for him? He's a Beatle for God's sake! Of course, he's gonna mess around!" The thought jolted through my brain. George and the girl were taken by Ringo to the kitchen and once Ringo returned, the three stared at me in my frozen state.

"Ashley? Are you there?" Ringo asked.

"I-I need to go for a walk..." I stammered.

"Oh my God..." Paul realized. I managed to grab my coat again and the door was open before I could even blink. I ran. I don't know what came over me, but I just ran. It wasn't until I exited the building that the tears actually came. And they were big fat ones. My heart had just broken.

 

**Paul's POV**

 I'd been right all along. She loved George in return. And he'd gone and cheated on her. That or he'd been just leading her on. Either way, it was a nasty thing to do.

"What just happened...? Did you know about...her?" I asked, nodding to the kitchen.

"No, I thought he was just going out for a haircut...I had no... I mean he told me he was sweet on Ashley. He really had eyes only for her. This has just got to be a mistake..." Ringo stammered, completely flustered. John rolled his eyes and got up.

"Oh my God, you two! Standing around here discussing theories and no one is going after the poor girl who just obviously had her heart broken!" He said.

"Y-Yeah one of us should probably go after her...or do you think she needs space?" I fretted, weighing two sides of the situation.

"Oh for the love of...." John muttered under his breath, as he grabbed his jacket and hurried out of the door.

"Well I guess he's going." Ringo remarked.

"Poor Ashley." I thought. George had hurt her. And I was angry at him for that.

 

**Ashley's POV**

 There was a nearby park that was still lit up by street lights. The atmosphere seemed to draw me to it like a moth to a flame. I was bloody cold, but the tears streaming down my face in a steady stream kept my face warm to a degree, until the tears started freezing.

"Just get me the hell home." I thought. How he could do that to me, I didn't know but it hurt. I'd never felt like I did just being with him before in my life and that feeling just shattered. I walked the paved walkway just in miserable silence. I didn't know where I was heading, I didn't particularly care. If the dark pathway miraculously lead me back to 2015, I'd accept it though I knew that wasn't likely and I'd just end up hopelessly lost but again, didn't care. After about half an hour of crying and wallowing in self pity, it did dawn on me that I was indeed hopelessly lost. I found a snow covered bench and decided to go sit on it after brushing the snow away from it.

"Ash, what are you doing?" I said aloud. This was perfect. Already having a breakdown earlier and now George fooling around after he'd so clearly declared his love for me...this was shaping up to be a wonderful day. And now I was God knows where in the snow and dark with no means of technology for communication. I heaved a huge sigh and dried my eyes on my sleeve just feeling empty inside. And then out of the darkness I heard

"Ashley! Ashley Bunting!" That last name still struck me like prickles but I recognized the voice anywhere.

"John?!" I called.

"Ashley!" He called back. Through the dim light I saw him.

"There you are! What in God's name are you doing all the way out here? You'll catch your death in this cold." He spoke rather sternly.

"What's it to you? Why did you come for me?" I clipped, closing up at his attitude.

"Well because when a girl runs out clearly upset, it's the right thing to do to go after her. And since neither one of the others had the balls to do it, here I am." He answered, still kind of gruff.

"Oh...well, thanks. I really have no idea where I am.." I chuckled, feeling the tears coming back.

"Lucky I found you then." His tone softened. That made the tears come again. In heaving great sobs. I really hated others seeing me cry, much less a guy who's you know a Beatle and you know my **_grandfather_**.

"Hey, believe me, he's not worth the tears over." He assured, sitting beside me on the bench. I could tell he was a little apprehensive about touching me in any way.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be upset." I cried.

"Well, you clearly had feelings for him and he appeared to share them, so yes, by definition you should be. And that's okay." He pointed out. This was John saying this.

"Thanks John." I sniffed.

"Anytime. I couldn't just let you catch your death out here. Here." He removed his coat.

"Oh no, no you don't have to.. I have a coat." I protested but of course there was no arguing with John Lennon. So I took the coat and just draped it over my shoulders. He was left in just a blazer and I knew he must be frozen but it was very nice of him.

"We should get you back home." He suggested, getting up, clearly eager to get home. I just wordlessly followed him. I was alone with John for the first time since he caught me playing piano. There was a million things I could've asked him or talked to him about but I was drained and said not a word the entire walk back. I felt crushed. Nothing needed to be said. Once I got home, Paul was pacing in front of the door like a caged animal. I didn't realize how late it was until I caught sight of the clock on the mantle. It was well after eleven!! I didn't even realize I'd been gone that long. I didn't even remember what time it was when I left. John was cold and immediately turned up the heat while Paul nearly bulldozed me over.

"Ashley! Where have you been? I was worried sick!" He cried like a mother hen.

"I'm sorry, Paul I must've lost track of time." I sighed, removing the two coats I had on.

"She got lost." John added.

"And there's that, yes." I nodded. I felt anxious just being in the flat. George was here someplace. I didn't know of that Joyce person was still around, most of me didn't care to know.

"She's gone...if you were wondering. Ringo put him to bed." Paul answered, though I hadn't asked.

"Ah." I murmured. I noted John making a 'cut it out' motion with his hands. Paul cleared his throat then, almost wondering how to proceed.

"You should get some sleep, it's late." He suggested. I nodded.

"I was heading there. Goodnight you two. And thanks again John, for you know finding me and all." I said quietly.

"Don't worry about it. Get some rest." He answered in a gentle tone I'd never heard before. I didn't have the heart to react to it though as I just went to my bedroom and closed the door tight. I changed into new pajamas I had gotten that very day and crawled under the covers trying to warm up. Sleep wouldn't come though because every time I closed my eyes I saw George with that other girl.

"Why was I so stupid?" I wondered as tears spilled from my eyes once again.

 

*******

 

Morning came all too soon for me. I'd barely slept, tossed and turned all night with visions of George with the other girl and then how his life does turn out in my timeline. Married twice in his life, one son, a massively successful music career and his life tragically ended by cancer so young. Needless to say I was a mess by the time 8am came around. But still I knew things had to be done so I forced myself out of bed and into the shower, trying to wash away my miseries. Changing into one of my new outfits, a navy skirt and cream colored blouse job, and doing my hair like most ladies did back then with a headband, and teased up I was really starting to fit into the era. I didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. At least I looked alive though I felt far from it. I really didn't want to take the chance of facing George that morning but I knew I didn't exactly have a choice. Putting on my best game face, I exited my bedroom. Of course wouldn't you know it, the first person I saw was him.

"Morning Ashley." He smiled brightly at me. I don't know what came over me but I just came around and socked him one right in the nose!

"Don't you speak to me like that you filthy animal." I spat. He looked utterly stunned as his poor nose started to bleed and then it dawned on me

Oh my God...he had no idea!

"What was that for? Wh-what happened?" He asked, in stunned horror that I'd struck him. I was shaking.

"I-I'm sorry...I-oh God..." I cried, taking off running again. I didn't even bother with my coat that time, I just ran out of the flat and down the stairs.

"Ashley!!" George's voice echoed after me. I ran outside the building and fell against the wall, breathless. My hand hurt from hitting him, I couldn't believe I'd actually hit him.

"Ashley? What in God's name are you doing out here with no coat on?" Ringo startled me by coming up the walkway, cigarette in hand.

"I punched George." I replied, without missing a beat. To my surprise all he said was

"I see, come with me, let's go have a coffee." So I followed him away from the building.

 

 

 

 

 


	16. FIFTEEN

**FIFTEEN:**

Coffee sounded great about then, and Ringo walked into the shop like he owned the place. I figured he must frequent it often.

"Go have a seat. I'll get us something warm." He offered. So I just sat without a word. When he came over with a steaming mug of the black liquid, I thanked him gratefully. He sat across from me, staring at me with concentrated blue eyes.

"What?" I asked softly, glancing down at my drink.

"I'm sorry." He replied.

"Sorry, why are you sorry?" I asked him.

"I'm sorry I didn't keep an eye on George. I knew he had something planned special for you and he was going for a haircut that was all...I guess he must've been more nervous that I thought to go in for a few drinks." He explained. I sighed.

"Just forget about it. It's done. He-he doesn't even remember so I'm just gonna let it go." I decided.

"So you're gonna forgive him?" Was his question. I looked up. Of course that would be the human thing to do, if he had no idea what he was doing, but I couldn't say yes I would forgive him. My heart was broken.

"I don't know..." I said softly.

"Oh. Well I'm sure by now he knows you're mad at him for something." Ringo sounded like he almost was hoping I'd make up with George. I curled my fist that had connected with George's face earlier. I felt bad I'd hit him, I'd never hit anyone before.

 "Yeah." Was my soft answer. I felt like crying again but refused to let the tears come out. I wasn't weak.  We finished our coffee in silence after that and Ringo walked me back to the flat. The other three were in the living room, Paul standing by the door again, John looking disinterested that I'd returned and George...poor George still held a bloody handkerchief to his nose.

 "Ashley? You've really gotta stop running out like that, you're gonna give me a heart attack." Paul sighed with a light chuckle. I think he was trying to lighten the mood.

 "I'm sorry Paul. I won't do it again." I answered quietly, avoiding eye contact with any of them. There was sort of an awkward silence.

 "Well I need to go grab some stuff for the trip..." Ringo suddenly spoke up.

 "I-I'll come with you. I do as well." Paul volunteered. Once the two were gone, John looked from George to me.

 "Something tells me you two should be alone for a bit." He decided, getting up and grabbing his jacket as well.

 "John please...don't leave." I half begged him. George wouldn't speak but John just gave me a sideways glance that said 'talk to him.' and left the flat. I stood still in my coat by the door and an awkward silence filled the room. I wanted to just avoid him altogether so I removed my coat, hung it up and made my way for my bedroom.

 "Ashley..." George finally spoke. I froze and cringed.

 "Yeah?" I forced myself to say.

 "I'm really sorry." He apologized. I finally willed myself to look at him. He took the handkerchief away from his face and his dark eyes were filled with remorse.

 "I...accept your apology." He brightened at that.

 "So you'll go out with me tonight? I swear we'll actually go somewhere." He asked. I sighed.

 "No, George...I think we shouldn't… have anything between us for a while." I lowered my eyes again.

 "Oh...I see." Was his reply.

 "I didn't mean it, Ashley. What happened last night was a mistake. I don't even know who that girl was. I just went for a drink because...I was nervous about taking you out. I do like you. I really do." He tried to get me to forgive him.

 "I know...you were drunk. Still, I was hurt and...I need some time." I spoke clearly. He seemed to accept it, but it clearly upset him as he got up without a word and left the flat as well. I sighed. Well wasn't this just wonderful.

 "George!" I called after him. I hated conflicts I really did, but I wasn't just gonna kiss and makeup. I was starting to believe that I should really just leave them all alone romantically, John for sure because you know RELATED but George needed to know that maybe being an item wasn't gonna work. I didn't wanna hurt him further, but I didn't know what else to do. Throwing my coat on, I ran down after him but he was fast on his feet and long gone by the time I reached the lobby.

 "Great. Now what?" I thought. I could've gone back inside by myself but I was already downstairs. I had no hope of finding George I knew, so I just decided to go on a walk and let my legs take me wherever they desired. I exited the building and headed left. Jamming my hands in my pockets, I just wanted some alone time, but it didn't last very long. Half an hour away I was downtown where the shops were. Then suddenly from behind me, I heard my name being shouted.

 "Ashley!!" I whirled around to see Ringo running toward me with his eyes wide open in shock.

 "Ringo, what is it?" I demanded, a little worried by his expression.

 "It's Paul." He sputtered.

 "What? What's wrong? Where is he?" I demanded.

 "The alley behind the bakery up there...there's these thugs and they...they beat him up and.." He stammered. I blanched.

 "You left him?!" I cried, launching into a fast run toward the bakery.

 "I was hoping maybe John was nearby or something...I don't know what to do, I think he needs a doctor." He ran after me.

 "Damn it Paul, you're such a target." I thought. He really was with his feminine like features. Many I knew from Sienna telling stories thought he was a sissy back in Liverpool. I raced behind the bakery and found Paul laying unconscious on the ground, his face all bruised and bloodied.

 "Oh Paul..." I knelt down next to him and tried to shake him awake. He wasn't coming around though.

 "We need help..." I decided. Of course the only help I could think of was..

 "I'll run home and see if George or John have returned home. If not, I'll call for an ambulance." I said, getting up.

 "Stay with him. If he wakes up, keep him comfortable." I instructed poor Ringo who looked worried beyond belief for his friend. I took off running as fast as my legs would take me down the street heading back for the flat.

 "Please God, let George or John be home." I silently prayed. It was maybe fifteen minutes to run back but, what else was I supposed to do? I suppose in hindsight I could've used a payphone to call for help, but I panicked. When I made it to the building, I bounded up the stairs two at a time and by the time I got to our floor I was absolutely breathless, but I pressed on. Throwing the door open, I called

 "Hello?!" The flat seemed empty to my dismay, but then I noticed John's coat hanging on the peg. He was here!

 "John?!" I called. But no answer. I ran around the flat looking for him and noticed his bedroom door was closed.

 "Is he asleep?" I wondered in my worried state of mind. I didn't care. Paul was hurt. I threw open the door to his bedroom, expecting him to be napping or something but to my utter shock he was indeed in bed but with a girl!! Both without a strip of clothing on!! I gasped way too loud and he finally realized I was in the house when he looked up and saw me standing in the doorway with my jaw on the floor.

 "Ashley! What the bloody hell are you doing?!" He cried, going red to his hair roots. The girl shrieked and went to cover herself. My hands flew to my eyes.

 "I'm so sorry I thought you were sleeping or something!" I said, just as embarrassed.

 "This had better be good." He growled at me. I still kept my eyes shut.

 "It's Paul. He's been beaten badly by some thugs or something." I said. Pause.

 "What?! Where?!" He cried.

 "Behind the bakery uptown, I'm so sorry, I didn't know what else to do. Ringo is with him but he's not waking up." I said. I felt like crying again, after seeing Paul unconscious and bleeding and John....well you know already.

 "Well why the hell didn't you call an ambulance?" He demanded. Someone blew past me that I imagined was the girl he was in bed with from the scent of perfume I got as she blew by.

 "I don't know! I'm not from here!" I felt a tear escape. Suddenly someone touched my shoulder.

 "It's safe to look now." His voice. I took my hands away.

 "I'm sorry you had to see that. Let's go." He said, looking determined. Without a word, I led him out the door and broke into a run toward the bakery with him hot on my heels. I needed therapy after what I'd just seen, but I tried to just focus on Paul. Fifteen minutes later...more like ten, he had really long legs...(I'll shut up now...)  Anyway, we ran behind the bakery once again and Paul was now sitting up but looking like he got run over by a truck.

 "John..." He winced.

 "Oh my God, Paul who did this? Someone call a bloody ambulance!" John said. Ringo took off running like a scalded cat.

 "I-I don't know...I couldn't see." He moaned. I stood with my back to the adjacent wall.

 "Did you try to fight back?" John asked him.

 "I tried but you know I'm no good at that stuff." He answered. Ringo came back.

 "The ambulance is on its way. We should maybe move to the front of the building?" He suggested.

 "Ringo, do you remember anything about the men that attacked Paul?" I asked him.

 "Uh... One was blonde... the other dark haired." He said.

 "Anything else?" John asked, interest piqued.

 "Uh... I think one of them had a blazer on for London University." He said, thinking hard. I stood straight.

 "Uni students? A couple of punks beat up Paul?" I said, my eyes snapping with fire in them.

 "Which one had the blazer?" John asked.

 "The blonde one." He replied. to that, John just nodded curtly.

 "Can you walk, Paul?" He asked his mate. Paul tried to get up and managed too, but he started to collapse again. Ringo ran to support him and together with John they helped him to the front of the building while I ran on ahead. Lucky I did too, because the ambulance arrived just then.

 "The young man who was attacked?" The paramedic asked me. I pointed to the three men coming from the alley. Paul was taken right away and Ringo went along with him.

 "Are you going to the police?" I asked John.

 "No, they take too long to do anything." He said bluntly.

 "So what is it you're gonna do?" I asked him curiously. He just faced me and set his jaw. He had this sharp look in his dark eyes that I knew all too well. Dad got the same look when he was about to do something risky but he was to stubborn to just go to professionals.

 "Just go on back to the flat, Ashley. And don't answer the door for anyone." He told me in a firm tone.

 "John...what are you gonna do?" I asked warily.

 "Just go. I'll be fine." He said, giving me a slight push before walking briskly in the other direction. So I did as he asked, I walked towards home, but I had this uneasy feeling in my gut. Something told me that John was gonna find the college kids who beat up Paul and make them wish they weren't born.

 

 


	17. SIXTEEN

**SIXTEEN:**

**A/n: Who is enjoying this story? Please feel free to like and comment your thoughts.**

 

Well I was home by myself for about an hour when George came in. He didn't want to talk at first, but I sort of just blurted out to him

 "Paul's in the hospital and John may just have a death wish!" After further explanation, George decided to go down to the hospital and asked if I wanted to come. He was being so sweet to me that I felt like a monster for earlier.

 "No, I should wait here for John." I anxiously replied.

 "Alright. I'll ring if I see him." He told me, which was nice. Once he left, I tried to keep myself busy but I didn't trust John's judgement. He had the same burning stubbornness he passed to his son and to me. The stubbornness that made us all act rashly. I could go find him but God knows where he even was! I took to cleaning up the kitchen to keep myself busy, but it didn't exactly work as well as I thought. As the day got later, I decided to make something up for dinner that the lads could eat when and if they came home later. I really knew nothing of how Paul was or how long he'd have to stay in the hospital. Regardless, I made up a chili from what I could find in the cupboards and fridge. It was really starting to smell good by the time six rolled around. With no one coming home by then, I really started to get worried, and wondered if I should call the hospital. But just as I was about to, the door opened and George and Ringo came in with Paul. He still looked awful, but he smiled when he saw me.

 "Ashley...this isn't as bad as it looks, believe me." He tried to sound macho which was kind of adorable.

 "Awe no you look fine. But you should probably lay down. I made up some chili, I'll bring you some." I cooed at him. I felt I should spoil him because he was hurt.

 "Okay...where's John?" He asked. I looked to George and Ringo.

 "Um, he's out. He'll be in soon." I fibbed. I didn't need him worrying. George still eyed me, as Ringo took him to his room.

 " _Do_ you know where John is?" He queried. I shook my head.

 "Not a clue. I'm getting worried, he's been gone for hours." I admitted, wringing my hands.

 "Well...the thing about John is you can't get in his way. Once he gets his mind on something, he's like a dog after a bone." George explained. For some reason, my mind went back to earlier with the girl... I shook my head to shake the images from my head.

 "Yeah and he really cares for Paul, so that would give him added incentive." I nodded, biting my lip.

 "You got it." My chili was a success, I got George and Ringo fed before I took Paul's in to him.

 "So, tell me the damage." I said, handing him his food. He was sitting up in bed looking better than he had.

 "Well, I guess I cracked a couple ribs but either than that, just bumps and bruises. It looked a lot worse I guess." He shrugged, not thinking much of it.

 "Yeah. It didn't look that great. How's your head?" I touched his forehead gingerly. He had a small bandage on it.

 "It's okay." He replied, though I know he winced when I touched the area.

 "You poor boy." I smiled at him. It had been an eventful day to say the least.

 

 *******

 

Hours went by and John still hadn't returned. I tried to go to bed, exhausted after one hell of a day, but I laid awake, wondering where in God's name he was. Paul fell asleep early, the poor lad and George and Ringo called it an early one as well. Around 11, just as I was finally starting to doze, I heard the front door open and close. Half awake, I jumped out of bed and wrapped a new light shawl around me. I opened the door and went toward the entrance.

 "John? Is that you?" I asked, stifling a yawn.

 "What are you doing up?" He answered, in a dismal tone. I flicked on the lamp and almost shrieked. His face was all bruised and bloodied up. He looked worse than Paul!

  ** _"John Winston Lennon!_ **What happened!" I cried. He looked at me funny, obviously not remembering having divulged his middle name to me.

 "You're not my mother, Ashley." Was his response.

 "True, but oh my God, at least let me help you." I begged.

 "Fine." He agreed. I took him into the kitchen and made him sit while I dug out the first aid kit from under the sink.

 "Do you want a tea or something?" I asked him.

 "Sure. Why not." He seemed very closed off. So I put the kettle on before going to him with the first aid kit. I popped it open on the table and took a couple swabs and dabbed them in alcohol. He watched me looking amused.

 "You should be a nurse, Ashley." He teased, lightly.

 "Don't go complimenting me yet. This is gonna sting like a mother fu...." I started, before catching myself. He looked alarmed at me.

 "Language, Miss Ashley!" He teased, warming up finally.

 "Oh like you'd be offended." I rolled my eyes and attacked him with the swabs. He didn't yelp or anything, but he gritted his teeth. Of course he was just trying to be a man.

 "So, do you wanna tell me what happened?" I asked as I cleaned his face up. He was silent for a moment or two.

 "Fine, I went after the Uni kids Ringo described." He said what I figured from the beginning.

 "Ah...how on Earth did you find the exact ones?" 

 "After hours of looking for a blonde guy in a Uni blazer." Was his 'well duh' answer.

 "Did he admit to beating up Paul?" 

 "Oh yeah, after I punched it out of him." He growled.

 "I see. So where did this all come from then?" I gestured to his face.

 "The punk was tougher than I thought...He called me terrible names, Ashley." He muttered, his tone of voice getting all low and vulnerable suddenly.

 "Terrible names? You realize it's just a Uni kid, right? What's the matter to the whole grand scheme of things?" I returned, as I finished. His face looked better than it did, just a little purple. I went to stop the kettle as he sat there staring at the floor.

 "But that's the fan base really. Young people..." He trailed off. I'd never seen John like this before. I didn't really know how to take it.

 "What did he say to you, John?" I out rightly asked, sitting down next to him and plunking his tea in front of him.

 "He said the only reason I avenged Paul was because I was his boyfriend." He revealed and I almost choked on my tea. John and Paul had an inseparable bond, anyone knew that. They were like brothers. But gay? This was the early 60's... That wasn't even near accepted back then, I could understand why John was upset by it. It was deemed an insult to him.

 "Oh...wow...well he had a lot of nerve." I stared wide eyed. John sighed.

 "I-I don't act like that, do I?" He looked at me with worried eyes.

 "John, no. You don't. You sought justice for your friend and that's commendable. Just next time don't go off all half-assed about it. Just, call the police next time, alright?" I said, reaching into the first aid kit for some bandages.

 "Fine, _mother_." He said, perking up again. That tease twinged at my heart. Mother. It's what he called his wife, my grandmother. I swallowed hard and tried to not let my mind go there. Instead I just pressed hard on a bandage to cover one open cut still on his left cheek and then he did yelp.

 "Hey! Easy." He whined.

 "I'm not your mother." I remarked.

 "Fine, would you rather, baby, darling, sweetheart?" He listed them off.

 "Let's just go back to 'Miss Ashley.'" I nodded. He smiled.

 "Do you like that one?"

 "It's growing on me, yeah." I shrugged, bandaging a few other cuts. He winced a little at one.

"Sorry." I apologized.

"It's fine I can take it." He gave me his best smile. I finished in silence, just making sure I got him all cleaned up. I didn't know what Mr. Epstein was gonna say when he saw Paul and John all beat up like they were. And we left for America in just over a week! I was just praying that it cleared up fast. No one was gonna keep quiet when two of the Beatle boys looked like they did. I wondered if this would happen if I hadn't been there. I sort of had made them all go out by my issue with George, so in a way it was all my fault.

 "You're thinking." John spoke after a long while.

 "What gave me away?" I smiled a little as I placed the last bandage into place just over his eyebrow.

 "Your brow is furrowed deep. I do the same thing. What's on your mind?" He asked.

 "Oh, nothing. You guys, America, George...." I listed off.

 "Well that doesn't sound like nothing." He smiled.

 "Hey I've always got something going on in my head. Runs in my family. We're very over imaginative." I shrugged.

 "You should talk about them more, your family." 

 "Yeah, well...there's not much to talk about." I lowered my eyes as I tidied up my mess. Silence again. I didn't see, but I knew he was watching me move about the kitchen.

 "Thanks, Miss Ashley." I smiled at my nickname.

 "For stitching you up?" I asked.

 "And you know, just talking with me." He replied, looking a little sheepishly.

 "No problem. Nothing a good chat can't fix." I was quoting my dad again. He smiled.

 "Hey, I like that." Perfect.

 "So...are you headed off to bed then?" He shrugged.

 "Nah. I'm not tired yet. Fancy a dance?" He gave me a devilish smirk.

 "John Lennon! I'm not dressed, and it's late. Won't we wake the others?" I blushed a little bit, wrapping my shawl tighter around me.

 "Oh they would sleep even if the place was on fire. Come on, you look fine." He insisted, reaching out for my hand. I couldn't pass up this side of John, even if his face was a little bruised.

 "Well, very well. One song." I agreed as he led me to the living room. I couldn't help but smile which was what I totally needed after the day I'd had. By then it was midnight at least. John turned on one of the dim lights, softly illuminating the room.

 "What are we dancing to?" I asked as I watched him go over to the record player and sift through the collection of LP's there.

 "And if you choose your own song, I'll lose all respect for you." I teased.

 "No it's not one of our songs. Just wait." He answered, choosing his LP and putting it on the turntable. A familiar tune filled the room, not too loud but not too soft either.

 

_Are you lonesome tonight,_

_Do you miss me tonight?_

_Are you sorry we drifted apart?_

 "Do you know this song?" John asked, coming over to me.

 "Yeah I know it." I smiled, swaying to the music. He took my hand and placed the other gingerly on my waist. I could've cried. I was dancing with him. I was dancing with my grandfather in 1964, to Elvis. It was both weird and memorable all at once. In the dim light you couldn't even see his wounds. All I saw was just him.

 

_Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day_

_When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?_

_Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare?_

_Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?_

_Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?_

_Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?_

 "Are you excited to be going overseas?" He suddenly asked.

 "Yeah. Are you?" I replied.

 "Oh absolutely." Quiet again. We floated across the living room floor and it was absolute magic.

 

_I wonder if you're lonesome tonight_

_You know someone said that the world's a stage_

_And each must play a part._

_Fate had me playing in love you as my sweet heart._

_Act one was when we met, I loved you at first glance_

_You read your line so cleverly and never missed a cue_

_Then came act two, you seemed to change and you acted strange_

_And why I'll never know._

 "You're one of a kind, Miss Ashley." Another sudden comment. I looked up.

 "In what way?" I wondered.

 I dunno, I just never met anyone like you before." He said. I smirked.

 "Am I better than that girl earlier?" I joked. He laughed.

 "Again, I'm so sorry about that. And yes, I'd have to say so. You're strong. You don't let anyone push you around. You seem like you know what you want from life." I blushed at that.

 "Well I don't know about that." I replied, softly.

 "You are, believe me. I'm an excellent judge of character." He joked. I just smiled, still finding it hard to believe I was here with him right at that moment.

 

_Honey, you lied when you said you loved me_

_And I had no cause to doubt you._

_But I'd rather go on hearing your lies_

_Than go on living without you._

_Now the stage is bare and I'm standing there_

_With emptiness all around_

_And if you won't come back to me_

_Then make them bring the curtain down._

 "You're a wonderful dancer." I complimented him.

 "Every man should be in my opinion. You're very light on your feet as well." He replied.

 "Well you know, I just pick it up." I chuckled. The song finished with it's last verse and John actually sang along.

 "Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?

Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?" We stopped in the middle of the floor as he gave an elaborate bow. I giggled and dropped into a curtsy elegant enough to please the Queen.

 "Thank you for this dance, Miss Ashley." He smiled, taking my hand and planting a gentle kiss upon it.

 "Thank you too." Was my mesmerized answer. As I crawled back into bed shortly after, I was all smiles. If my reason for being here was to get to know John then I'd just made a huge breakthrough. And it was amazing. I never wanted to go back home right about then. I was happier than I'd been after a day of misery.

**_Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?_ **

 

 

 

 

 

 


	18. SEVENTEEN

**SEVENTEEN:**

Morning came quick once again, but even after a late night, I was up at the crack of dawn feeling rather refreshed. I had the Elvis song still playing in my head from the night before and sort of walk danced my way around the flat to the living room. When I got there, I noticed that something had been slid through the mail slot in the door nearby. Curious, I went over and picked it up. It was a newspaper and the front page unfolded.

' **BEATLE SECRETS, JOHN LENNON TELLS ALL'**

The headline read with an extremely tasteless picture of him below! I recognized it, the photo had been taken probably shortly before I needed to have my _eyes bleached_ when I walked in on John with the girl! The girl had been a reporter?!

 "Did he know this?" I wondered. If Mr. Epstein got his hands on this, and odds were he already had, John would be in a ton of trouble!

 "John!" I cried, running back through the house. Deciding to **not** open his door this time, I took to banging on it with my fists.

 "I'm up! I'm up! Where's the fire?" He mumbled, groggily as he finally opened the door from the other side, still in his pajamas. I thrust the paper in his face and he paled.

 "Wh-Where did you find that? What is this?" He demanded, taking the paper.

 "The front door. Someone dropped it off... John did you have any idea that girl you were with was a reporter?" I asked, running a stressed hand through my tangled hair.

 "No....Oh God this is bad, Ashley this is really bad." He legitimately looked scared witless.

 "What are we gonna do? If your manager finds this..." I trailed off as he shoved the paper back into my hands.

 "Get dressed." He ordered.

 "Hey! Wake up!" He then shouted at the top of his voice and banged loud on the two other closed doors. Protesting groans and mumbles were heard as I scurried off to throw on a dress. I worried a little about Paul who should probably stay in bed longer, but I knew John probably needed to go fix his mistake which involved the rest of the lads. Me? Probably support.

 "You _**what**_?!" I heard Paul yell, a few moments later and I knew John had told what happened. By all accounts it wasn't his fault really but...it was a mess. I ran out of my room after dragging a brush through my hair and the others were dressed and racing for the door. Paul still didn't look great, John better than I figured he would.

 "He's gonna kill all of us." I voiced. And the others knew I was right as we headed out the door for Epstein's office.

 

 *********

 

"For once! For once could you manage to stay out of trouble?!" Mr. Epstein yelled at the four lads standing in his office. It wasn't Paul's fault what happened to him. He was a victim of assault." George stated, in a very matter-of-fact tone.

 "And so, why wasn't I informed? Or why did you not go to the police? You're grown men! show some sense!"

 "I went after the offenders myself." John spoke up. Epstein sighed.

 "I can tell. And now you're plastered all over the paper, Lennon! What have you to say for yourself?" He was steaming mad. I stood by the doorway feeling awful for the boys getting chewed out.

 "It...won't happen again?" Oh no. I knew that tone.

 "Give me something more believable." The manager raised his eyebrow.

 "Fine, it probably will happen again." He smirked.

 "You, out of my office. All of you. Except Miss Bunting." He ordered sternly. The boys turned to face me.

 "Sure..." I said, uncertain of what was to come. The four of them filed out of the room in silence while I moved closer.

 "I'm sorry for them, sir. Yesterday was not a good day...I can assure you..." He raised a hand to cut me off.

 "I didn't ask to speak to you so I could scold you. You're not to blame for any of this. John is an instigator and always in trouble. I'm just trying my best to keep things out of the paper that could ruin myself and them. This article luckily is mostly not even true and it's gonna take a week at least to clear it all up, but like I said, John looks for trouble. He almost loves being in it." He explained. I looked down.

 "I beg to differ, when I showed him the article this morning he was rattled." I pointed out.

 "Hm, that may be so, but he's still a troublemaker. Always will be. I know you're here with Paul's recommendation and I know he cares for you a great deal. Not sure if he's warned you but I'm going to warn you now. Stay away from John Lennon. He may look charming and all that, but he _will_ hurt you." I walked out of the office feeling a little railroaded. The entire point of me talking to the boss was for him to tell me to stay far away from John as possible?

A: Was that any of his business?

and

B: Did he know John at all?

I felt a little confused and deflated.

"Hey, Ashley what did he say?" Paul asked as they all saw me coming into view.

 "Um...nothing important." I lied, looking at John and then looking away. I refused to believe he'd hurt me. I recalled our dance the night before. He was so gentle, so genuine...the exact thing I'd been searching for in him since I arrived. It couldn't be a ploy. I'd already been hurt once and it wasn't him. Sure he was a jerk at the beginning but I'd gotten through all that! I knew in my heart he'd never hurt me...I just hoped now that I was right.

 

 ********

 

Days passed and we were all busier than ever getting ready for our departure. The lads were called away to the studio or for interviews many times so I didn't see much of them for a few days. That was okay though because then maybe I figured John wouldn't know I'd been avoiding him. I knew I shouldn't believe what Mr. Epstein told me, but somehow my gut felt uneasy whenever I was around John after that. And it scared me. George and I were sort of reconciling for what happened between us but to be honest, the only two I spent any length of time talking to was Paul and Ringo. As the time drew closer for us taking off for America, I found that I didn't seem overly excited anymore. I was having a war with my mind.

 

**John's POV**

 She was avoiding me. I knew. Since Epstein chewed us out she'd been distant and aloof from me. Had I said something to upset her? Since things with her and George fell through, I thought our relationship was getting stronger. She was an amazing girl, remarkably smart, strong, stubborn... we danced that night and she was happy...I was happy. But now she would barely talk to me! I wanted to confront her, but I didn't want to upset her either. Before I knew it, it was the night before leaving for America. A milestone for us as a band. We'd gone out to celebrate and Ashley came along. She barely talked the entire time and only to Paul. I was jealous, I was hurt and just confused. Ashley had come to mean so much to me. And suddenly everything stopped. I didn't understand. I wondered what I had done wrong.

 

**Ashley's POV**

  _The wind was brisk and cold against my skin, I wondered why I wasn't wearing a coat. I looked down and saw I was wearing jeans and a grey t shirt. 'Where am I?' I wondered, rubbing my arms to try and warm myself up. I looked around and saw traffic whizzing by on the busy street and buildings illuminated , some with Christmas decorations. 'Christmas? Its February.' I thought, confused. 'Wait...Did I go back to my own time already?' I thought. It couldn't be possible.... I tried to distinguish where I was from the buildings. They didn't seem like London. And then I saw it. The Dakota. I was in New York!_

_'Oh no, not again!' I moaned. I knew where I was now, what was about to happen._

_'You're dreaming Ashley. Just wake up. WAKE UP.' I told myself. But to no avail. I caught sight of John with Yoko returning home to be with their son, my **dad**. And I saw the man who would end John's life. _

_'JOHN! LOOK OUT HE HAS A GUN!!!' I screamed at the top of my voice. Both of them turned but again somehow I was too late and the shots rang out again._

_'NO!!!' I screamed, running full tilt to his fallen body. His wife stood by looking horrified. Someone apprehended the shooter, but the deed had already been done.  
_

_'John! John listen to me, wake up! You gotta wake up!' I cried, tears streaming down my face._

_'Ashley...is that you?' He said weakly. I shoved the hair falling into my eyes away._

_'Yeah its me, I'm here. Don't you leave me.' I said, choking back sobs._

_'I won't Miss Ashley...tell your dad...tell him I..I love him...' He begged, weakly._

_'You can tell him yourself, you'll be okay.' I cried. 'Tell him I love him...I love both  of you...' And he was gone._

_'John? John, no please...no! Don't leave! Wake up! Wake up!!_

Ashley, wake up!" My eyes flew open.

 "Don't go!!!" I cried loudly. I was drenched in a cold sweat. Panting heavily, I looked up to see a familiar outline standing above me.

 "You were screaming my name in your sleep. Are you alright?" It was John. I looked around still rattled and just started to cry.

 "I'm so sorry." I sobbed, over and over again. If this was some way of telling me to screw what warning I'd been given and just let him in and to stop avoiding him... it worked. I was reminded of what little time I had with him. Next thing I knew, I was taken into a strong and warm embrace. He'd never done that before.

 "It was just a dream." He assured me, softly, putting two and two together.

 "If only that were true." I thought. I felt like telling him. About coming clean about everything. But something told me that would be incredibly dangerous. So I just let him hold me as I cried my fears and remorse for treating him badly since the morning after our dance.

 "I'm here. I'll always be here." He murmured gently which only made me cry harder.

 

*********

 

Eventually I dropped off to sleep once again, all cried out. What I didn't know was that he was afraid to leave me, in case I had another spell. So he stayed for the rest of the night. When I woke up around seven the next morning, He was fast asleep in the armchair in the corner. I felt a smile tug at my lips. I'd been right all along. Even in my darkest hour, when I was beyond consoling, he was there for me. That somehow gave me solid proof that Mr. Epstein was undeniably wrong about him. As quiet as I could be, I took my blanket and draped it over him.

 "Thank you." I whispered before I dropped a kiss on his forehead and left the room.

 

 

 


	19. EIGHTEEN

**EIGHTEEN:**

It was still pretty early when I left John to sleep, so I decided to have a long hot shower. Our flight left late tonight, so we'd be arriving overseas on the seventh. Right on schedule. In the shower, visions of my nightmare came playing back to me.

_"Tell your dad I love him..."_ That sentence weighed on my mind. I wished I was back home right about then so I could confront my dad. These dreams tormenting my mind at night seemed to be telling me something, like some sort of missing clue as to why dad kept the truth from me. But I was in the Beatles' early days. If I was to get any kind of answers, I'd have to be around when dad was born... I could feel a headache coming on just thinking about it.

 "Maybe I'll never know the answer." I thought sadly, as I got out of the shower.

 "Cheer up, will you? You're going to America, with the Beatles!" I told myself. That was one big thing. The second was that my eighteenth birthday would be coming up in April, if I was there that long. I looked at my reflection in the mirror and put a smile on.

 "Today's a new day." I decided, looking at the positive. And I was going to start with making things right again with John. I really felt like an idiot for believing that he was bad news. I let the warning their manager gave me get inside my head. Realizing I hadn't any fresh clothes with me, I scurried back to the bedroom, hoping that John wasn't there. Luckily he wasn't and I was able to change in the privacy of my own room. I dressed extra nice that day, remembering something about ladies dressing up pretty for air trips. I would have chosen sweatpants and a hoodie back in my time but this was different. I put on my most comfortable skirt with a blue blouse and fixed my hair back, I even put on a little makeup. Our flight didn't leave until much later, but I could still look pretty. Shoving the graphic images my mind kept bringing to the forefront to the deepest recesses of my mind, I exited my room, feeling bright and hopeful. Paul, George and Ringo were all in the kitchen sipping on coffee.

 "Morning Ashley." They all sort of chorused after one another.

 "Morning. Taking it easy for now?" I asked, pouring myself a coffee as well.

 "Yeah...I don't think any of us slept well." Paul yawned.

 "Nerves?" I wondered, sitting down with them.

 "Well, you have to understand this is quite new for us all. We've never left the continent before." He smirked.

 "True. I guess that makes sense. Anyone seen John?" I nodded, sounding casual. If those three got wind that John had been in my room all night I'd never hear the end of it.

 "Think he might still be asleep. No one's rushing, we don't have to be out of here until three." George answered. I felt a pang at my heart. George and I still had not had a proper conversation since the incident. Too much going on and things were still awkward between us. I'd get my chance to though as both Paul and Ringo decided to finish some last minute packing. The silence was unbearable at first, I didn't know exactly what to say to him. Stirring my coffee slowly, I tried to form the right sentence, but he beat me to it.

 "So...you all ready to leave?" He broke the silence.

 "Um.. I think so." I replied softly. He sighed.

 "Ashley, I hate this. We have hardly spoken to one another since..." He trailed off.

 "I know. I'm sorry." I found myself saying.

 "Sorry? Why would you be sorry? I'm the one who messed up." He was astonished I had apologized. And that's when I was reinforced that he was the sweetheart I had known all along. We had just hit a roadblock, but in honesty, I didn't feel a relationship with him would be the best thing. After my lifelike nightmare plaguing my tired mind again the night before, I realized that I couldn't endanger the future, it was screwed up as is. Besides, having a relationship with George would mean probably he'd never meet Pattie, or Olivia. As it was, the timeline was off because as far as I knew, John wasn't married to Cynthia, I prayed I hadn't already mistakenly altered that.

 "I know...I'm just sorry I haven't really spoken to you. Perhaps it's time I started again." I offered a small smile.

 "I'd like that. So...can we agree to be friends?" He asked, with a shy smile. I breathed a small smile of relief that he hadn't asked for a relationship again.

 "Yes George, I think that's a grand idea." I agreed, feeling a weight lift off of my chest. I didn't realize both of us were just smiling stupidly at our coffees until John came into the kitchen.

 "What are you two smiling about?" He wondered. His voice sounded mighty tired. I looked up.

 "Oh, nothing. You sound awful, maybe you should go back to bed." I told him, as George just left the room silently.

 "I'm fine, Miss Ashley." Was his tired reply. He got himself a coffee and joined me at the table. His neck seemed stiff too and I felt bad.

 "You didn't have to stay, you know." I looked into my lap.

 "Well, I didn't know what was up. I needed to make sure you weren't unwell or something." He replied, making it sound like not a big deal.

 "Well...thanks." I replied. There was a pause.

 "Wanna tell me what that all was about though? It's not every night I'm woken from a dead sleep to someone screaming my name." He asked, with a slight smirk. I looked down again.

 "I-I don't wanna talk about it." My voice slightly caught.

 "Well it was obviously about me, unless there's someone else you know with the same name." He observed.

 "I dreamed you died." I blurted, once I did I wished I'd kept my mouth shut.

 "That I died? Well whatever gave you that idea?" He laughed lightly. I swallowed my words.

 "Well, you know dreams. They often don't make a lot of sense." I shrugged.

 "Yeah that's true. Well, however scary, it was just a dream. I'm not going anywhere, I don't plan on dying till I'm well over 100. Y-You know I've got to right? Someone's gotta look after this bunch." He smiled. Tears stung my eyes and I blinked fast to try and keep them at bay. He really had no idea.

 

 

*******

 

I was in a funk all day after my chat with John. I didn't even feel that excited to get on a plane for America. The lads just hung around, playing music mostly all day and laughing, reading and smoking. They tried to get me to play something, but I didn't feel like it. They tried to all get to the bottom of why I was unhappy, but they weren't cheering me up. I just ended up closing myself in my room. I laid on my bed in a pile, just looking at my packed bags by my door.

 "What am I doing here?" I thought miserably. I totally didn't belong here! Mother and dad were probably back home wondering what on earth had happened to me, Sienna was probably a basket case and I had no way of knowing when I'd return to them. Or even what I'd say! I just felt frustrated and fed up and still antsy from that horrid dream. Huffing, I got up off my bed and sat at my vanity just sitting with my face in my hands.

 "Cheer up will ya?" A little voice told me. I sighed and started absentmindedly rummaging through the drawers, just sort of making sure I'd gotten everything I needed when my fingers hit something. Bending down, I realized it was a notebook! There was nothing in it, but that gave me a fabulous idea. Grabbing the pen on my side table, I sat on my bed and began to write:

 

_February 6, 1964_

_I'm Ashley Julia Bunting. Bunting was the name given to me when I was born, but as of recently, I've discovered it's a lie. My real name is Ashley Julia Lennon and I'm somehow stuck back in time 50 years with the biggest band in history, one of which incidentally is my own grandfather I had no idea I was even related to until the truth came out of my parents. I was angry and cried myself to sleep, and woke up in the past. Now, I don't know how, but I feel like I'm here to get to know John before I never will. Regardless, it's all a little confusing and it sometimes keeps me up nights. I don't belong here, but I'm stuck here for however long...._

 I wrote for close to fifteen minutes nonstop of my adventures so far and was starting to feel a lot better, when suddenly there was a knock at my door. Closing the notebook and stuffing it in my bag, I opened the door to face John with a guitar. Come on out won't you, Ashley? It's no fun out here without our little piano player." He coaxed.

 "I thought Paul was your little piano player." I teased.

 "Oh come on he's not as good as you." He winked.

 "I heard that!" Paul's voice echoed. I couldn't help but laugh.

 "I did it! I made her laugh!" John called triumphantly.

 "Why are you trying to cheer me up still?" I kept teasing.

 "Because it's obviously working now. You need to learn to let things loose, Miss Ashley. The world's an awful nasty place, just take things as they are whether some mugger steals your handbag or you have an awful nightmare, just let it slide because tomorrow is always better." He said, lowering his voice so it was just us two hearing what was spoken. I felt a tug at my heartstrings but smiled nonetheless.

 "Thanks, John." I answered, gratefully.

 "Hey, that's what friends do." He winked.

 "Now come on. Let's go make the neighbors absolutely furious, shall we?" He suggested, in a laid back tone of voice I was growing to love. I laughed lightly.

 "They'll be glad we'll be gone for a while." I agreed, as I followed him to the living room.

 "Hey there she is!" Paul announced, giving me the piano bench. I smiled and mock bowed as they jokingly started cheering and whistling at my arrival.

 "You guys are a bunch of goofs, how on earth am I gonna survive you all in America?" I shook my head, pretending to be dismayed.

 "Well you haven't left us yet, so I'm sure you'll do just fine." Ringo winked at me. And in that moment, my excitement returned.

 

 

*********

 

After an afternoon of fun and relaxation, it was finally time to make our departure. and after a **hundred** stops along the way, we made it to the airport pretty late. Regardless of the hour, there were still a great number of fans waiting for the lads outside. It was then I realized that if I was seen with the boys, my face would be in every newspaper by the next day.

 "Hey, guys I can't go out there looking like...well me. I'm gonna need a disguise." I spoke up before we got out of the car.

 "She's right...she'd end up all over the news." Paul agreed, understanding instantly. As did the other three, evidently as they all took off things to add to my disguise. So I walked into the airport wearing my coat, with George's tied around my waist underneath my coat to hide my skirt, John's cap with my hair tucked up inside, Ringo's sunglasses even though it was pitch black out, and Paul's scarf. Luckily for me anyway, no one seemed to notice me as they screamed for the lads' attention. They waved at them and looked pleased as punch, which warmed my heart. I kept on my disguise all the way through the terminal and it wasn't until I got on the plane I realized how ridiculous I looked! Mr. Epstein, who was seeing us on, took one look at me and looked at me like I'd lost my mind.

"Oh, hi, it's just me." I smiled, removing the sunglasses.

 "Yes, I gathered that. That's quite the ...interesting outfit you've got on there, Miss Bunting." He answered, as the lads boarded. They all looked at me too and we all dissolved into laughter.

"What? It's fashion." My tired mind decided to be a goof, as I struck a pose. Ringo took out his camera and started snapping away as I kept posing, completely oblivious as to him taking my picture. Finally, after we'd had our fun, Mr. Epstein went up front to leave us be as the engines started. In that moment, Paul started to fret as I sat beside him.

"What if the plane goes down mid air? What if we run out of fuel? What if I get sick?" He started to babble.

"Paul, stop complaining." John sighed, tiredly.

 "You've never flown before right?" I asked Paul.

 "None of us have." He nervously replied.

 "Have you flown before, Ashley?" George wondered.

 "Once or twice, yes." I nodded, stifling a yawn.

 "Is it frightening?" Paul asked me, with wide eyes.

 "Oh, you'll be fine, you baby." I teased, ruffling his mop top.

 "Heyyy...don't touch the hair. And I'm not a baby." He sulked, half I'm sure all in good humour.

 "He's serious about the hair, I hear it's insured." John teased, leaning over. I snorted. I swear we were all running on fumes.

 "We'll all be fine. Planes are totally safe." I tried to assure the lads. As the plane started moving forward and faster, Paul gripped my hand. As for the others, George had his eyes shut, Ringo was looking out the window and John seemed fine until I noticed he was gripping both the armrests. As we finally lifted off into the air, I got excited because this was it, the start of a whole new adventure.

 


	20. NINETEEN

 

**NINETEEN:**

Once we reached cruising altitude, Paul seemed to settle down.

 "See? I told you it wasn't that bad." I smiled.

 "Don't we have a good mother, George?" John joked with his band mate sitting near him. George just smiled silently.

 "Well, I don't know about you all, but I'm exhausted." Ringo yawned.

 "You can sleep if you like. It's gonna be a long flight." I advised.

 "Aww, that means he'll snore the whole time." Paul whined.

 "Oh don't be mean." I half laughed. After that, Paul and George decided to rest for a while too and soon it was quiet in the cabin, Ringo wasn't snoring near as bad as I thought, it made me wonder if the others just liked to pick on him for a little thing and turning it into a larger thing. Leaving them to rest, I went toward the back of the cabin with my notebook. I figured John was asleep too, so I felt like I could have some alone time.

  _Well, we're en route to America. It's very early in the morning but I was never one to sleep on a plane. These four guys really don't know how big of a hit they'll be overseas. Thousands of fans will be waiting for them at the airport, they'll have sold out shows across the country and I get to witness it all. It's a whole different kind of magic..._

 I wrote for a while just reveling in the quiet when suddenly I heard

 "Writing in your diary?" I jumped at that and snapped the book closed. Looking up, I saw John awake and joining me at the back with a notebook of his own.

 "Um...sort of, I guess. Gives me something to do. Wh-What are you doing up? I thought you'd be asleep like the others." I asked, trying to regain my composure.

 "I tried, but Paul talks in his sleep." He pulled a funny expression. I giggled quietly.

 "That's actually really funny. My friend does to..." I said without really thinking. Suddenly I got real homesick for my best friend.

 "So you know how irritating it is." He related.

 "I guess I do." I replied, going to put my notebook away.

 "Oh, don't stop on my account, I just had the same idea as you." He encouraged, flipping open his own notebook.

 "You have a diary?" I smirked.

 "No, it's just...ideas." He replied, getting a little embarrassed.

 "Well hey, that's alright." I smiled. We both fell quiet, I just started doodling on the back page of my notebook and when I  looked up again I saw him bend over his book, furiously scribbling away with wide rimmed glasses on. It occurred to me that I'd kind of forgotten he wore those glasses. Of course he had all the eyesight and perception of a hawk because he caught me staring at him.

 "What?" He asked, in defense.

 "It's nothing, I just can't recall seeing you in glasses before." He took them off and frowned.

 "I hate them, but I can hardly see without them." He admitted.

 "Do you wear contact lenses?" I asked, acting as if I didn't know every little pointless factoid about him.

 "Sometimes, but they hurt after a while. I figure no one will judge me if I wear these, here." He set them on the tray he was writing on.

 "No one should judge you anyway. You look fine in them." I assured him. Curiously, I took the glasses and put them on. John just laughed.

 "Geez, you are blind!" I giggled as he'd just turned into a hazy blob.

 "You look like a college professor or a mad scientist." He joked. I took them off and gave them back.

 "Well then it's a good thing I don't wear glasses. I guess I got my mom's genetics." I said.

 "Your father wears glasses?" He asked.

 "Yeah, has for...well as long as I can recall." I nodded, realizing I was getting into dangerous waters again. I fell silent again, just mulling things over in my head.

 "So what are you working on?" I suddenly wondered.

 "Just songs. Ideas, words." He replied, absentmindedly, bent over the notebook again.

 "Can I see? “I asked him, moving closer. He looked up at me.

 "I don't normally show my work to outsiders." He remarked with a slight twinkle in his eyes.

 "Hey, I'm no outsider. C'mon, please? You know I'd never judge you." I pleaded.

 "Oh fine." He relented, handing me the notebook. I flipped through the pages, recognizing many scribbles as lyrics to their songs, random poems, it was incredible. The most recent one he was working on was the lyrics to You've Got to Hide Your Love Away.

 "I told you, it's nothing spectacular." He shrugged, as I finished.

 "Oh but it is. It's amazing. It's where songs begin. Thanks for showing me." I replied, gratefully. He just looked mighty pleased that I had liked his mediocre scribbles. But it was so much more than that. It was his livelihood in those pages. Who he was. And it was beautiful.

 

 *********

 

I must've finally dozed off not long after our chat because when I woke up again, the sun was streaming through the plane window and I was back in my original seat. I looked around and saw the others were all asleep. Peeking out the window, all I saw was clouds and water but then a very famous structure came into view.

 "Hey, wake up." I nudged Paul next to me. He muttered something sleepily.

 "Wake up, you gotta look." I said, louder. His eyes then fluttered open.

 "Are we here?" He yawned. I pointed to the window.

 "Look for yourself." He looked and out the window we both saw Lady Liberty rising into the skies. We had arrived!

 It didn't take long at all for the other three to wake up and realize where we were. And then it was a frenzy. Them all getting ready, fixing their hair and clothes like a bunch of primadonnas  before the fasten your seat belts indicator came back on. I just combed my hair out, I wasn't the star attraction. Just before the sign came on, Mr. Epstein came back.

 "There's gonna be thousands of fans waiting for your arrival. Say your hellos then head directly into the waiting car." He instructed.

 "Will you be needing your disguise again, Ashley?" Ringo asked. That probably was a good idea, this was to be a historic moment and I couldn't be in any shots.

 "Maybe just a little bit, but you guys go on ahead, I'll get off once the roar dies down." I decided. And so we got prepared for touchdown. Using only half my disguise, the sunglasses, hat and scarf, I sat in my coat just waiting. The excitement pulsating throughout the cabin was contagious. As the wheels touched the tarmac and we came to a stop, I could already hear the scream of the fans.

 "This is it." John said to the group, looking ecstatic.

 "Go on you guys." I smiled as they all made ready to leave the plane.

 "Don't lag behind too long." Paul called over his shoulder as they left. The screams got louder as they did and a smile crept onto my face. I looked out of every window until I could see them on the steps just waving and having their pictures snapped. I'd only ever seen that in black and white photos. It gave me this exhilarating rush to actually be seeing it. As thy finally made their way to the waiting car, I saw my chance. grabbing my bag and tucking my hair up into the cap, I scurried off the plane with tunnel vision to the car. Once inside, I let out a deep breath.

 "It is you under that hat!" John remarked teasingly. I just shook my head and laughed at him.

 "This is incredible. Look at the turnout." Paul gasped, completely dazed. George was waving out the window to hysterical fans.

 "I didn't know we were this big of a hit here." Ringo said, completely aghast by it all. I grinned.

 "You four are starting an era. Beatlemania." I shared. They all laughed.

 "Beatlemania, I rather like that." Paul smiled. It certainly had begun.

 

 *******

 

When we pulled up to the hotel we'd be staying at in New York, I didn't realize just how massive the hotel was and I'd been to New York before, back home. Apparently I wasn't the only one in complete awe.

"I didn't think it was this big..." George was the first to speak. And the awestruck boys only went from there. The lobby had them absolutely speechless as their poor manager had to speak for them. They were too busy running about and looking at things like small children and it was actually really funny. I just stood there, politely but mostly just really tired. After a bit, I corralled the four excited guys and we headed for the elevator to our rooms.

"Are you staying with us Ashley, like in our room?" George asked curiously.

"Oh no, she has her own suite." Mr. Epstein stepped in.

"Aww!" John whined.

"Oh grow up, I'm sure I'll just be down the hall. Besides you're stuck with me for the rest of the time during the day anyway." I said giving him a light punch in the arm. Once we reached our floor, the boys went absolutely ballistic.

"Lookit that!" Paul announced, once Mr. Epstein opened the door. He had every right to be awed. The lobby was something, but the suite was 15 times better. The four of them started running around like crazy kids again. I guess I knew they'd never seen anything so fancy. Smiling to myself, I decided to leave them to their glory and find my room to freshen up. It had been a long flight after all. So after taking my room key from Mr. Epstein, I took off down the corridor to my own suite. When I opened the door, it was much the same as the other room, maybe a little bit different but it was lovely all the same. It reminded me of staying in Monaco one summer when I was thirteen with mum and dad. The hotel was so fine I was terrified that if I touched anything it would break apart in my hands. The feeling gave me a pang of homesickness but I tried to shove it away. This was an amazing opportunity. I was finally here in America with the most popular band in the universe. This was something many only dreamed about and I was living it. Admiring everything my eyes came across in my massive suite, I headed for the bedroom and almost gasped out loud when I saw the bed. It looked like I could get lost in there for days just hibernating. The bathroom was huge with a great big bathtub and luxury soaps, shampoos and other things.

"I could get used to this." I said aloud. Sure I'd seen fancy things all my life but never anything this fine. This...this was special. I took my time, enjoying some alone time for once just unpacking my things. I didn't want to get too comfy because I knew how fast we'd be moving to another city, but I couldn't help it. It was actually quite odd not to hear the lads wandering around and chattering all the time because I'd become accustomed to that living at the flat back in London with them. I found it odd how quickly I fit into that norm. I grew excited just thinking about seeing their first show in New York. It would be incredible and nothing, not even YouTube videos and old concert tapes would prepare me for the thrilling rush I knew I would feel. After spending about half an hour on my own, I changed into a fresh nice light purple dress, fixed my hair back and touched up my eyes a little bit before I heard the familiar chattering from outside the suite door. There was a brisk knock before they four of them came on in.

"Well isn't this impressive? Bet you've never stayed somewhere so fancy before, have you Ashley?" Paul asked. I walked out to them from my open bedroom with a smile.

"No, I can't say I have." I responded, in a light airy tone.

"Well don't get too comfortable. It's a big country we have to make our way across." John winked. I just shrugged.

"I'll just enjoy what I can. Besides, if this is the standard we're living at while you guys are touring, I hardly think I'll be disappointed." I smiled.

"And that's our Ashley. Always the optimist." Ringo added.

"So c’mon lets go out." George encouraged.

"Go out? Aren't you all tired?" I asked.

"Ashley, have you met us?" Paul lightly laughed.

"Right, right, the never ending train of energy, you four are." I said, wagging my finger at them. I was tired but I figured, hello New York City! So I grabbed my coat and bag before following them out of the room and down to the lobby. The adventure had officially begun!

 

 

 

 


	21. TWENTY

**TWENTY:**

New York City was absolutely bustling with activity as per norm. The lads were still over the moon excited and popping into nearly every shop in sight. I figured with as many people around in New York that they wouldn't be recognized but well, that was a stupid thought. We ended up running more than walking!

 "Bet you miss London right about now, huh?" I laughed breathlessly as we ducked around yet another corner to escape hysterically screaming teenagers.

 "Are you kidding? I live for this." John joked. Paul peeked around the corner.

 "I think they're gone." He remarked. So we stepped out of the alleyway to continue our exploration but came face to face with cameras! Somehow reporters had been following the foursome and they were absolutely blindsided. Flashes went off in our faces, blinding me several times.

 "You can't be in any of these pictures!" My mind shrieked at me. A billion questions were bombarded at the lads, many of them to do with me.

 "Who's the girl? Is she your girlfriend? What's her name?" I was starting to panic, not knowing what I should do. We were trying to escape, but the reporters had formed a wall around us. Just as I was ready to dive through someone's legs to escape, I felt someone grab my hand and swing me around. When I stopped, my lips were touching someone else's and the reporters went crazy! I tried to focus on what was happening as I couldn't really see straight and as I finally was able to step away, I realized who had kissed me. It was Paul. The reporters had seemingly gotten what they wanted and dispersed almost immediately. I was speechless. As it seemed, so were the other three Beatles. I knew he had a huge crush on me and I'd already been down that road with George since I'd been here. I didn't want this. I admired him sure, he was ridiculously adorable but what he did for the reporters was out of line. Not only would his and my face be plastered over every tabloid in the state by the next day, but my face would be out there. The face of a girl from a different time. I could single handedly ruin the future forever.

 "Well...that was definitely something." John was the first to speak. I wasn't looking at any of them because I wasn't sure how to process what had just happened.

 "Ashley? Say something, will you?" Paul asked. I cleared my throat.

 "We should head back." I simply replied, turning to walk away. John and Ringo quickly followed my lead and George after Ringo but Paul hung back. I didn't know what he was thinking, I wasn't sure I cared. I had my own issues right about then. A million conflicting emotions were raging inside of me not to mention panic about my identity being discovered.

 "Are you okay, Ashley?" John asked, ever concerned about me.

 "I'm fine. I just wanna be alone." I answered, perhaps quite harshly. No one spoke to me after that.

 

 *******

 

I locked myself in my suite when we got back, I didn't know if Paul returned but regardless I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't really know why I was mad at him, he was just doing what the people wanted. They wanted some action and answers to the big question of who is the mystery girl. Of course come the next day, I'd now be 'Paul's Mystery Girlfriend.'

 "Perfect." I muttered to myself as I stared out my bedroom window at the still bustling city below. I didn't want to see anybody. Now that my face was out there in a time I didn't even belong in, I felt I ruined everything.

 "I might as well just go in now and announce to the four of them that I'm from the future and a direct descendant of John." I thought, burying my face in my hands. My argument with my parents before I ended up here was still vivid in my head. Before I started crying, I heard a knock at my suite door. Slowly, I got up and walked toward it. Peeping through the small hole in the door, I saw it was Paul and internally groaned.

 "What do you want?" I asked, opening the door a crack.

 "Can...can I talk to you?" He returned, looking like a kid who'd just broken a window. I couldn't resist that look. Sighing, I opened the door all the way.

 "Come in." I said softly. He stepped inside and I closed the door.

 "Listen, Ashley you have every right to be mad at me. I shouldn't have done what I did. I guess I figured if they saw something then they'd leave us all alone." He apologized. I looked down.

 "Yeah, I kinda figured that. But...you know my situation. If I end up all over the papers tomorrow then...my future might not work out so great." I explained.

 "Well you won't. I made sure your hair was covering your face. Because I have a plan." He told me.

 "What? Are you sure?" I asked, suddenly not feeling so doomed.

 "I'm sure. I'd never make you into a spectacle, Ashley. You know me."

 "You're right." I realized.

 "You can still be mad at me, I shouldn't have kissed you like that... we're not...you know." He said, growing nervous.

 "I'm not upset now. Just let's not repeat that, alright? You're my friend, Paul. I couldn't think of you as anything else. I told him truthfully. He almost looked disappointed by my answer which sort of made my heart skip a beat. Was he hoping I'd somehow confess I was madly in love with him?

 "Right. Okay then. So do you want to hear my plan? You'd have to come with me. The others had their input on it too." He added, suddenly.

 "Of course." I smiled, hoping to forget that disappointed look in his dark eyes. We walked down the hall to the lads' suite and everyone was in the sitting area, including

 "Mr. Epstein?" I asked. Of course he'd probably found out what had happened earlier.

 "Don't worry Ashley, I'm not here to give you a tongue lashing." He assured me.

 "Yeah, he already got that over with." George replied, jokingly. I couldn't resist a smile, as I went and took a seat.

 "So, what's this big plan of yours?" I wondered.

 "Well, based on what happened today with the reporters, it's my considered opinion you try to stay out of the limelight. The fans would like nothing less than to track down someone like you, who's close to the lads and tar and feather her." Mr. Epstein started. I nodded slowly.

 "So...what I stay cooped up in a hotel room?" I asked. That didn't sound like a whole lot of fun.

 "Well she has tried, she sort of had a disguise on the flight over here." John pointed out.

 "That's what I was getting to. We think it would be safer for you when you do go out to don a disguise. Actually, I've already done the liberty of picking up a few things for you." He explained, reaching next to him for a large bag.

 "You'll be like a spy or something." Ringo smiled, wiggling his eyebrows.

 "So a disguise? That's the big idea?" I said. It was a little exciting sure, but I was certain I'd still be identified as the mystery girl from the newspaper.

 "Well, partly. The papers only know you as the mystery girl. So we're going to give an inside interview where we'll tell them who you are." Paul explained.

 "Ashley Bunting?" I asked. The surname still sounded weird to me. Like it was reeking of the same lie I kept on thinking about.

 "No, no. Not that obvious. While no one would know that name, we figured you choose an alias and then we say that you're Brian Epstein's Executive Assistant and personal assistant to us." John added. I sat back.

 "That's actually a grand idea." I chuckled. It was foolproof! Mr. Epstein handed me the bag.

 "Well go on then, try all this stuff out." He encouraged. So I took the bag and scurried into the bathroom. Inside was a black skirt and white blouse that looked much more grown up than any of the other dresses I had. The skirt was a little big, but nothing overly uncomfortable. Also in the bag was a very convincing and I'm gathering rather expensive brunette wig that was about my own hair length. So I did my own hair up with the hair ties and barrettes that were in my dress pocket (I usually kept some on hand back home so here was no excuse not to) before I put on the wig. When I looked in the mirror, I almost gasped aloud. Not only did the new hair make me look older and different, but now I looked even more like... _him_. I cleared my throat and focused on finishing up. There was some red lip stick in the bag as well as a pair of wide rimmed sunglasses.

 "Well, so long Ashley." I thought as I exited the bathroom.

 "Prepare yourselves." I announced before I stepped back into the living room. Collective whistles came from the four boys, Mr. Epstein had left.

 "You look so different...it's a good different. I wouldn't recognize you." George was astonished.

 "Yeah you look really great, Ashley." Paul agreed. I took off my sunglasses.

 "I can't be Ashley anymore, remember? What is my new name anyway?" I asked.

 "Why don't you come up with one? You're much more creative." John suggested.

 "Oh yeah sure, me creative. I'm sorry what is it you guys do for a living?" I sarcastically returned. John smirked at me.

 "Alright fine, how about...Jane?" He threw a name out there.

 "No, no she hardly looks like a Jane, what about Mary?" Paul added.

 "Margaret? Elizabeth? Gertrude?" George listed. I snorted.

 "God, please not Gertrude." I laughed. They fell silent for a moment, but then it came to me.

 "What about Molly? Molly Jones?" I said, smiling to myself because only I would get that reference.

 "Molly Jones. I like it." Paul nodded.

 "Yeah it works..." George agreed.

 "Plus it's simple, easy to remember." Ringo added.

 "So I guess Miss Ashley is out, it's Golly Miss Molly from now on." John teased. I just smiled. This was going to work.

 

 

********

 

As per my new job title, I was put to work almost immediately by Mr. Epstein. The lads were a little disappointed as the next day dawned and I wasn't allowed to go out with them. They had a full roster but I'm sure they wanted me as a welcome distraction. But things needed to be different now, and while I was a little disappointed myself, I was alright with keeping my distance from Paul still. What happened when we were ambushed was still on my mind even though he's apologized and such. The look he gave me. He liked me. He was the only one who knew the...most truth about me and he liked me. I absolutely could not return the favour, I'd already done so with George and I didn't even want to think of what I might've already unleashed back in my timeline. Let's just say it was better that I was keeping busy. I set up my own little office in my suite with a huge load of paperwork that I had to sift through. Lot's of numbers involved, it was a good thing I was good at math. There were about a hundred things I had to prepare for mailing and my tongue tasted funny after licking so many envelopes and stamps. It was painstaking work, but like I said, it kept me busy. Around 5:30, just as I was finishing up plowing a road through the mountain of papers, the door to my suite opened and the one and only John Lennon entered with a flourish. I smiled.

 "What brings you here?" I asked my friend.

 "Come on. You've probably been slaving behind that desk all day and we're all dying to get out and do something actually fun." He told me, coming to yank me from my chair.

 "Go out? Aren't you exhausted? It's probably been a big day." I said.

 "Exhaustively bored, if that's what you mean. C'mon, I bet you're starving." He encouraged.

 "Alright fine. But remember, once I leave the building I'm Molly Jones." I reminded, mocking a sophisticated accent. He beamed.

 "Right, because you're undercover now." He winked. I just chuckled as I grabbed my jacket and fitted my brunette wig over my already braided hair. Putting on the sunglasses I kept in the coat pocket, I faced him.

 "Well then, let's go." I said, tossing my fake hair over my shoulder. I had to admit it was exciting to leave and go out as my alias. And John was definitely a welcome face after a long day of paperwork. My only concern was that I wouldn't be too awkward around Paul.

 "Be your alter ego. Remember you're Molly Jones, personal assistant. Act like it." I thought. As we joined the others downstairs, I took on a new persona and hoped I could hide all my feelings behind it. For now.


	22. TWENTY ONE

**TWENTY ONE:**

"Hey I got her away from the work table." John announced to the other three as we reached the lobby. The others turned and brilliant smiles lit up their faces. I still tried to avoid Paul's gaze which I knew was probably making him crazy, but what else could I do?

 "Nice of you to rejoin the world Ash...I mean Molly." George said, correcting himself.

 "Good to see you guys too. I swear, all I'm seeing is numbers swirling through my eyeballs." I chuckled, trying to make myself appear open and friendly.

 "Well, we ought to fix that, shouldn't we?" John proposed, facing his mates.

 "Absolutely, let's hit the town." Ringo grinned. I was game. I let the others go on ahead of me outside to the waiting car but noticed Paul hung back.

 "Hey." He said softly to me which made my heart miss a beat. I was still rattled for obvious reasons, this was dangerous territory if he actually had legit feelings for me.

 "Hi..." I replied, sort of in a reserved way.

 "Are we okay? I feel like there's still something not right between us." He addressed the elephant in the room. I looked away briefly.

 "Can't we just forget about it? We're friends, right?" I decided.

 "Of course we're friends, just I don't know, you seemed to be a little aloof since what happened a couple days ago." He pointed out, as we walked out the door. I gave him a kind smile, starting to relax again.

 "I'm sorry about that. I'm fine, I promise. Let's just you know...forget it happened and move forward. Sound good?" I asked.

 "Absolutely." Was his reply and I softly let out a sigh of relief having dodged that entirely. Now maybe I could have a good time.

 

**********

 

The boys were extra chatty in the car as it cruised through the New York City streets. I was drinking in every single minute of scenery because when else would I get to see the Big Apple several years before they were even born? I was only half listening to what the four were talking about until I heard them mention the Ed Sullivan show.

 "Oh my God, that's right!" I thought. Their appearance on the Ed Sullivan show was the very next day. I felt giddy with excitement and slightly mad at myself for forgetting. I'd been so caught up in everything else since the plane landed in America.

 "You hear that, Ashley? Our first show in America is gonna be on television." Paul said to me, his eyes positively sparkling. I grinned.

 "Yeah I heard! That's incredible!" I expressed my own excitement. Just as I spoke, the car stopped at our destination, a bar. How appropriate.

 "I declare a celebration. We're in America, we've finally got Ashley with us again, so lets party." John beamed as he threw open the car door.

 "I can't go in there..." I tried to say, but it went on deaf ears.

 "Well won't mother be displeased, her seventeen year old daughter frequenting bars." I thought sarcastically. But honestly, would anyone care much in the 60's? I think sometimes the lads forgot I was so young.

 "Will the people even let me in?" I wondered.

 "One way to find out I guess." I thought as I followed the others out of the car. The doorkeeper let the four in right away, they didn't need any identification whatsoever. Before I had a chance to speak and try and sound older than I was, John called to the doorkeeper

 "She's with us." And he let me in, no questions asked.

 "Thanks...I don't know what the rules are here." I said, kind of feeling nervous that I was in a New York bar.

 "Doesn't matter, you're with us. They'd probably let you kill someone if we gave the okay." John replied, somewhat morbidly. I just laughed. He was an odd creature that man. Not long after that, I lost him in the crowd and didn't feel so safe anymore. I looked around at all the people dancing to whatever music was coming out of the big jukebox in the corner. All these people seemed somewhat in a trance with their odd dancing and interesting clothing. I eventually found my way to the bar stools and just sat down. This was somewhat like the gala we'd attended back in England, but totally not as elegant or sophisticated. By then, I'd lost sight of the lads entirely, I kinda figured I would. They were young men who just wanted to party till they dropped and I suppose figured I could take care of myself and not follow them around constantly.

 "What can I get ya?" A voice startled me from behind. I turned to see a large man with tattooed arms behind the bar.

 "Um...a beer I guess." I faltered. I didn't know a thing about the world of alcohol aside from the one drink I had with George back in England. That seemed so long ago. The barkeeper nodded and handed me one.

 "Not from around here, ain't ya?" He spoke to me as I stared at the glass of fizzing liquid.

 "England." I replied, still staring at the glass. He didn't answer me after that and I looked up to see he had gone.

 "Do I even wanna drink this?" I thought. It honestly looked like ginger ale and I'd seen dad drink these tons of times.

 "It can't be that bad." I thought as I took a sip. Well it certainly wasn't ginger ale, it was much more bitter than that. But somehow I enjoyed it. And before I knew it, I'd had three. Well after that I don't remember much, I still couldn't find the boys, so I started wandering around and I believe I was dancing at one point. But after that, nothing. What I didn't know at the time was, I'd gotten myself drunk for the first time.

 

*********

 

**Paul's POV**

 It was really full in that place, so it'd be easy to lose anybody. But we'd all somehow managed to lose Ashley in the thick crowd. At first, none of us really realized until it was three hours later and no one had seen her. I corralled the other three and told them what was going on before we split up to look for her. It was gonna be a little harder because she was in disguise and didn't look like the Ashley we'd all become well acquainted with. I darted through the wall of people, looking for anything that looked like it belonged to her. And then I saw her. She was out on the dance floor, moving to the music but horribly out of time. I approached her and touched her shoulder.

 "Hey! Where've you been?" I called over the loud music. She looked at me and started laughing uncontrollably. She was unsteady on her feet and totally not herself.

 "Oh my God, you're drunk aren't you?" I cried, half to her half to myself.

 "Who me? I'm dancing! Can't you tell?" She howled with delight. I tried to grab her so she wouldn't go completely crazy.

 "Ashley, You're drunk!" I repeated.

 "No I'm not!" Was her slurred reply. I blamed myself. Just then, John, George and Ringo found us.

 "You found her...what's wrong with her?" Ringo asked, looking at Ashley trying to get away from me while almost tripping over her own two feet.

 "Good God, she's blasted!" John thought it was hilarious.

 "How'd this happen? We should get her back to the hotel." George was stunned.

 "I should've been watching her. I don't think this was the best choice of destination for a seventeen year old girl." I lamented. So with George and Ringo's help, we were able to get Ashley out of the place and into the waiting car. John came behind us, still laughing his head off.

 "What's going on? Where are going?" Ashley drunkenly muttered as we shoved her into the car.

 "We're going home." I simply replied to her as we all piled in after her.

 "Okay daddy." She answered. I just sighed as the car took off. No one really said anything after that, though I'm pretty sure John was still laughing under his breath. I failed to see how Ashley being drunk out of her mind was funny, but he always had a twisted sense of humour. Ashley passed out on the way home, so it was no easy task trying to get her to bed. All I knew was that she'd be pretty sick the next morning.

**Ashley's POV**

 I woke up feeling like my head had been jack hammered. Opening my eyes felt like sandpaper and my limbs felt as heavy as cement bricks.

 "What happened?" I muttered, forcing my body to roll over. But I rolled over too far and hit the floor!

 "Ow!" I yelled and I wished I hadn't. It made my brain hurt. I realized why I fell, I was on a couch. And not even in my own hotel room. I didn't and couldn't move from the floor so I just stayed put as I heard footsteps approaching.

 "Hey! It's alive!" A familiar voice rattled my aching senses.

 "Shhh...I think my head is broken." I muttered, trying to sit up but failing. Suddenly, I was being lifted up from under the arms and plunked down on the couch.

 "You'll live, you're just hungover." The voice said, an air of amusement in the tone.

 "Good God, how?" I mumbled, trying to pry my eyes open. I realized I was still in my dress from the night before, my braided hair was now all frizzy and a mess.

 "I'll let you figure that one out." My rescuer laughed. When I realized it was John, My face went totally red.

 "Oh my God... I look like a wreck." I covered my eyes.

 "Hey, I've seen worse. We just kept you here overnight to make sure you slept it off." He smirked. I could tell he was totally enjoying it.

 "Well...thanks." I sighed, still not feeling so hot. I wasn't overly pleased with myself either for obviously getting myself drunk.

 "It's nothing, we've all been there before. You're gonna feel like hell for a few hours but it'll pass." John advised. I was grateful for his advice even if he only was seeing the comedy in the situation, but that was classic for him. I tried to get up again and that time was successful.

 "I guess I should go get straightened up, someone would think I slept in my clothes all night." I joked weakly, heading for the door.

 "Alright. Get yourself together though, tonight is the big night." John reminded me and instantly I felt guilty for being so much trouble.

 "Right, yes, I will be there even if I'm dead on my feet." I promised before walking out the door.

 "That settles it, I'm never touching alcohol again." I vowed to myself.

 

 

 


	23. TWENTY TWO

**TWENTY TWO:**

Okay I felt bad, despite John's efforts to make it seem like not a big deal, I still got myself drunk on the lads' watch. Granted they left me alone, but that was still no excuse for what I allowed myself to do. I felt like I had to make it up to the other three somehow. I didn't even want to know what I was doing while inebriated. The first step was a hot shower to wash the night before away. It felt amazing on my aching muscles and it helped clear up my head better. After that, I chose my nicest dress to wear that day and that night for the big show. Getting excited for that distracted me from my still achy head. This was the Ed Sullivan show! I'd watched YouTube clips of that show only a hundred times but this was totally different. I was going to be living it!

 "I need to apologize for my actions before all the fun though." I decided as I brushed and did my hair up in a single braid so it would be easier to fit my disguise wig over top later on. When I finally got out to the main area of my suite, to my surprise there was a note on the coffee table with a cup of coffee and two aspirin. Curious, I went over to it.

 "I thought you could probably use these this morning... P." The note read. I smiled a little, of course Paul would do something like this. I took the pills with the coffee and started feeling better almost right away.

 "Well I may as well go and face them all." I thought afterwards. So I made sure I looked presentable before leaving my suite and going down the hall. I hesitated before knocking on their door, but when I did, it was opened instantly by George.

 "Hey, Ashley there you are." He smiled.

 "Hey George. Is it okay to come in?" I asked, feeling sheepish and embarrassed right away.

 "Of course. How are you feeling?" George answered, ever the compassionate one.

 "Better. Thank you." I replied as I stepped inside the suite. The lads were all either draped over couches skimming the headlines or tuning their instruments.

 "Morning everyone." I said as cheery as I could.

 "Morning Ashley." The other three sort of collectively greeted me.

 "How are you this morning?" Paul asked me without looking up from his paper. Something told me that he wasn't happy with me because by his tone I felt a pang of guilt hit my gut.

 "Um, I'm fine now." I replied, my voice dropping. Everyone looked up after that, sort of noticing the elephant in the room.

 "I guess we might as well talk about what happened last night." Ringo spoke slowly. I smoothed my skirt as I took a seat, sitting rigid on the couch next to Paul.

 "Look guys, I'm so sorry about what happened. I swear to God I never even thought about what I was doing." I felt so bad.

 "I don't see what the huge deal is, she got drunk sure but haven't we all? She's not hurt or anything, so what's the problem?" John spoke up.

 "Well he has a point, I mean it's not that huge of a deal...right?" George looked at his band mates, agreeing with John. Ringo shrugged seeming not to really care either way, Paul though just looked incredulously at his mates before getting up and storming out of the room! I bit my lip as I watched him go. I knew things had been still awkward between us since the incident with the press and me getting myself drunk off my ass probably didn't help.

 "What's with him?" George asked. John waved a hand dismissively.

 "He's just overreacting; he'll get over it." But I wasn't so sure. Standing, I said

 "I'm gonna go see what's up." before walking toward where he'd gone off to.

 "Paul?" I knocked on the only closed door.

 "What?" Came his voice from the other side.

 "It's Ashley. Can we talk?" I asked, trying to get the weird feeling in my stomach to leave me alone. He didn't say anything but I heard rustling in the room before the door opened. I stepped inside as he went back to the dresser and absentmindedly fixed his hair.

 "I get the feeling you're upset." I just came out with it.

 "I'm fine, Ashley." He bluntly answered.

 "No you're not. I know you, and I know when you're upset. And I even think I know why. Look, I'm awfully sorry for last night. I don't know what else to say but sorry. I'm disappointed in myself and I promise I'll never do it again." I apologized, just pouring emotion into my words. He sighed.

 "I'm not mad at you, Ashley. I'm mad at myself." He finally admitted, looking at me standing near the door.

 "Mad at yourself? Why?" I asked, stepping closer. Paul looked beyond me to the open door so I closed it.

 "You came here out of the blue and I dunno, I feel somewhat responsible for you, whether you're from the future or from out of town like the others believe. I shouldn't have let you get away from me at the bar last night and get into that situation. So that's why I'm mad at myself." He explained. I bit my lip again.

 "Don't blame yourself. It was purely my fault. I ruined you guys' celebration and for that too, I'm sorry." I expressed myself. He gave me a half smile.

 "I guess John was right though, it wasn't that huge of a deal after all. As for the celebration end of things, we didn't end up celebrating as much. Figured we save that for after the show tonight, what do you say?" He smiled.

 "I say let's go for it. And I promise, no alcohol for me." I chuckled, raising my hands in the air as an oath of sorts. He smiled in return and looked like himself again.

 "So are we good? Friends?" I asked, dropping my arms to my sides.

 "Of course." He replied and somehow we ended up hugging.

 "Oh, and thank you for what you dropped off this morning." I added.

 "It's no trouble, you needed all the help you could get." He chuckled.

 "I told ya you can't leave these two alone." I suddenly heard a voice behind me. I stepped back and turned to see John and George smirking in the now open doorway. Paul cleared his throat and looked past us all.

 "We were just talking; what time is it?" 

 "Half past eleven." George chirped, looking at his watch.

 "That late already? Geez..." I thought. I must've really passed out.

 "Well that would explain why I'm so hungry." I shrugged.

 "Yeah well, grab something quick, we'd better get a move on soon." John advised, as we all exited the room.

 "This early? Isn't the Ed Sullivan show like...tonight?" I wondered, confused.

 "Ashley, don't you know us at all? You know there's always a billion and one stops to make before we actually get there." Paul laughed.

 "Oh yeah, that's true. I guess I'll go grab my stuff then and meet you all in the lobby." I said, scurrying away. I raced back to my suite, relieved that little episode was over and done with.

 "They're playing the Ed Sullivan show tonight this is like, amazing!" I thought, surging with excitement as I grabbed my disguise and my bag and coat. Oh yeah I was plenty stoked, and feeling a whole lot better. I raced down to the lobby where the lads were waiting for me while shoving on my wig and glasses.

 "There she is." Paul noted, pointing to me coming down.

 "Sorry, did I keep you?" 

 "Not really, Paul's just nervous." George smirked.

 "Nervous? Oh don't worry, you all will be incredible." I assured them all. We headed out after that, I tried to keep my excitement contained for the lads' sake, this was their moment after all. The day seemed to rush by just like that once we started. As Paul had predicted, we did make about a hundred stops before reaching the television studio. Brief interviews, autographs, you name it, they were busy doing it. I humbly stayed in the background, out of sight but thrilled with watching every moment from afar. Finally, after it seemed we'd never reach our final destination, the car pulled into the studio area and the people standing by the building just waiting for the band to show up was unbelievable. The excitement was contagious among the four as they saw the multitude of fans just waiting for them. I almost cried seeing all of it just because I was so proud and so blessed to be witnessing all this. Police were present almost every five feet and as the car stopped, armed guards were at the ready as the doors were opened. Screams of the fans echoed into the car as one loud noise. The lads were grinning ear to ear and I couldn't help but smile brilliantly too.

 "Hey, don't fall too behind." Paul called over his shoulder to me as they exited to their adoring fans. Right...I had to get in somehow without causing a frenzy. So, adjusting my wig and glasses, I left the car and held my head high as I trailed after the boys, trying to give off an air of importance. No one seemed to notice me at all, they were all too focused on the Fab Four making the grand entrance. Once inside, the noise seemed to dull down, but I knew full well all those screaming fans would be screaming later on once they were onstage.

 "Could you see that crowd out there? That's unbelievable." Paul was so excited.

 "It's a wonder I could hear myself think over all that noise though." John added. I just snickered.

 "They love you guys." I said, catching up with them.

 "I suppose that counts for something." George smirked. The corridors were already full of people coming to and from rooms, other acts for the show and television crew members.

 "Anybody got any idea where we're supposed to be?" Ringo raised a very good question and just as I was searching for an answer, Mr. Epstein appeared seemingly out of nowhere.

 "Ah, I see you all made it in one piece." He said.

 "You wouldn't believe the crowd outside." George said to the tall man.

 "Oh I believe it, you four are bigger than I think you know." He replied, with admiration in his voice. John and Paul shared a look and tried to hide smiles. Of **course** they had to turn everything into a dirty inside joke. I wasn't dumb, I got it and subtly rolled my eyes. Paul noticed and his cheeks suddenly went flush.

 "Perhaps these four should get to their dressing room and freshen up before the rehearsal?" I suggested, putting on my executive voice. Mr. Epstein looked at his watch.

 "I think that's a very good idea, Miss Jones." He answered, without missing a beat which sort of caught me off guard until I remembered that was my alias.

 "Will you listen to her? She thinks she's our _mother_." I heard John say to his mates.

 "That's right, _Johnny_! Now be a good lad and run along." I teased him, making my voice higher pitched. He just made a face at me and marched off after Mr. Epstein with George, Paul and Ringo in tow. I laughed to myself. There was never a dull moment with them. I followed after them all through more corridors and just listened to the lads chatter on about nonsense really. When we reached the dressing room, Mr. Epstein just stood by the door. The lads sort of just flopped anywhere which seemed to be their MO, and I stood near the door as well.

 "I'll leave you lot to it then. They'll be calling you for rehearsal soon. I trust that Miss Jones will keep you four in line." Mr. Epstein said before leaving. I closed the door behind him.

 "Hear that boys? I'm in charge." I smirked at them. John just stared right at me and said

 "Yes _mother_." With all the innocence of a child. What a goofball. That seemed to become his thing lately, as a joke and I didn't really mind most times but it only reminded me of what he'd become one day and where life would take him. To the end of the Beatles, through drug abuse and alcoholism, to Yoko Ono, my grandmother who he fondly called mother as well and eventually to his tragic death. That all hit me at that moment as it had once before and I felt weak in the knees all of a sudden. I didn't reply with any snappy comeback or teasing jab that time. Paul noted that as I'd had my feelings hurt.

 "Oh come on, John be nice to her." He gently chided.

 "I'm bein' nice. Right Ashley?" John looked at me with another goofy expression and I couldn't help but smile.

 "Yes, yes you are. I'm fine Paul I was just lost in thought there." I said, trailing off.

 "Anybody we know?" George lightly teased. That got all four of them chuckling.

 "No, no not like that." I rolled my eyes again.

 "Keep doing that, your eyes are gonna get stuck back there you know." John pointed a finger at me.

 "Oh now who's being who's mother here?" I finally teased him back.

 "Mm, still you. God knows I'm not mature enough to keep these kids in check." He joked.

 "Oh and I am? You're what...seven years older than me?" I laughed.

 "Yeah...but you're a girl. And way better at keeping us all in check, therefore you're our mother." He felt the need to explain. I just laughed.

 "Well don't you worry, John..." I said, walking over to where he was sitting.

 "I'll always be around to keep you all in check."I beamed. Some sort of funny feeling just overtook me that reminded me of where I was and who I was with.

 "Wait, hold it. That's perfect." Ringo suddenly jumped up. Before I knew it, he'd taken a snapshot of me.

 "What's that for?" I inquired.

 "I'm just taking pictures to remember this trip." He shrugged, looking down at his camera.

 "Aww that's adorable." I giggled. He just flashed me a smile.

 "So you'll always be around to keep us in check, eh? What about when you go back home?" George asked with a smirk. I just shrugged and let that one roll off my back. I was still here without any indication of making the jump back through time anytime soon, but all 3/4ths of the band knew was I was from some small town back in England.

 "I don't think I'll be going back anytime soon, besides you all are starting to grow on me." I winked. They smiled collectively at that. Just then, there was a knock at the door and a man with earphones around his neck came in.

 "Beatles?" He asked.

 "Yeah that's us." Paul spoke up.

 "We're ready for you on the set for rehearsal." He informed us all before closing the door again.

 "Well I guess that's you." I smiled as they got up and made their way out of the room.

 "You're coming aren't you?" George asked.

 "I don't have to." I shrugged, it was just a rehearsal after all.

 "Don't be silly, come on." Paul urged.

 "Alright, alright." I agreed, following them out the door. It was the beginning of a historic night.

 


	24. TWENTY THREE

**TWENTY THREE:**

The rehearsal went smoothly, I just sat in the seats and watched them tune up and run through a few brief sequences. To me just watching them there it almost seemed like I was watching them on a television, almost like it wasn't even real. It kind of reminded me of their first film, A Hard Day's Night where they played If I Fell. I must have had this goofy grin plastered on my face just watching them in their element. I loved every second. When they were finished, I tried to catch their attention as they started goofing off again the second they weren't trying to be professional. Finally, George noticed.

 "Hey there she is." He waved me over.

 "You couldn't see me from up there?" I smiled, walking over to them.

 "No, well the lights shine right into your eyes you know. How were we?" Paul asked.

 "Brilliant as usual. Listen, I'm gonna go track down where they keep the coffee in this joint and I'll meet up with you back in the dressing room." I decided as I was rather hungry and thirsty.

 "Sounds good." Ringo nodded before they took off. Smiling to myself, I headed off in search of the canteen. For the first time in a number of days I actually had time to think again. I was having so much fun here with the lads and watching them first hand as they rose to mega stardom. But I wondered

 "Just how long am I going to be here?" I wondered if I'd just end up back at home one morning and not know whether I'd dreamed up the whole crazy thing or not or maybe I'd end up staying here indefinitely.... what would that mean for my future? For John's future? The whole thing still gave me a headache, but it was important.

 "I can't stay here forever, I have a life back in 2015...I have a family, a best friend..." I thought. I was still angry with my parents, but what would they think happened to me? I'd been gone for several weeks now...had they searched for me? Were they still searching? Had they given up? Did they blame themselves for my disappearance? Did Sienna wonder where I was and try to text and call me a hundred times? What if I was stuck here permanently? I could just see it now. By the time the boys would implode and come to the end of the era that was the Beatles, I'd be 23 years old with no place to go. I'd try to keep them from breaking up, but by then their egos and hard hotheadedness would get the better of them and everything would just fall to pieces. I'd end up having to make up the story that I was staying in London indefinitely and then Paul would feel obliged to take care of me, thus interrupting his personal life and perhaps leading him to not ever meet his wife, Linda... the years would drag on and the four would go their separate ways. I'd have to choose what to do with my life after that...would I stay with Paul for good and just become part of his life or would I decide after a while to go with John? Either decision would break the heart of the other. Or would I even still just have to make my own way in this alternate reality and grow old alongside the lads? It was all so scary to think about. I'd be living without my parents, without Sienna... And possibly endangering my own existence all the more so. What would happen to me? If my father was never born, if I somehow became an interference to John meeting Yoko, would I just fade out of existence forever? What would become of John in the end? He would go through rough times in the 70s with drugs and alcohol...what would be my role? Would I have to keep tabs on him until that fateful night where his life would tragically end? Could I even stop it? God knows I tried in my dreams. Though I tried and failed... And what of George? He would pass away in 2001 of cancer...I wouldn't be able to do anything about that. All this grief and sorrow of losing 2/4 of the boys would be tragic indeed if I witnessed it first hand. I didn't know what I'd end up doing to make history either go according to the way it was meant to or if I would change John dying in 1980...but then who's to say he wouldn't die shortly after from some other freak accident. Fate could very well cause him to die either in a car accident or an accidental overdose, or some random health complication... All those thoughts accumulated in my head so much that I suddenly had to stop walking and back up against a wall. I couldn't breathe, my hands felt clammy, my mouth dry as a desert. My heart felt as if it was in someone's fist and they were giving it a good squeeze.

"What's happening?" I panicked, trying to bring my thoughts back to the present. I was scaring myself half to death just thinking all those things that I believe I'd caused myself to have a panic attack! Leaning my head back against the wall, I squeezed my eyes shut tightly and tried to focus on breathing.

"I'm fine, the lads are fine...you're in 1964 and that's all you need to be worried about.

"Hey, are you okay?" A voice interrupted my thoughts. I opened my eyes to see a young woman in a grey dress holding a clipboard, in front of me.

"Me? I'm fine." I smiled weakly.

"You're pale as a ghost, are you sure? What's your name?" The woman asked. I took a deep breath.

"I'm fine, I assure you. I'm...Molly. Molly Jones, I'm here with The Beatles, I'm their executive assistant." I answered, gathering my bearings again. The woman's eyes widened.

"You work for them?" She lowered her voice excitedly.

"Well, yeah..." I replied, not wanting to divulge too much.

"What are they like, you know, behind closed doors. Is their hair really like that?" This woman was obviously a fan.

"Yes their hair is really like that. They're nice boys, they like to cause trouble though, which is why I should be off." I briefly explained, getting a little uncomfortable talking so long with this stranger.

"Oh, of course, I just wanted to make sure you were alright there." She smiled.

"Thank you." I replied politely, and I was off. The thoughts I had before came threatening again, but I shoved them to the far recesses of my mind as I located a sign directing me to the cafeteria.

_"Be happy. Live in the moment._ " Words my father used to say filled my head and suddenly I wanted to cry. How could I be so mad at him and mother but miss them so bad at the same time?

 

**********

 

"Knock, knock." I said, my voice sounding much cheerier as I knocked on the dressing room door armed with coffee and bagels. The door was opened for me instantly followed by a plume of cigarette smoke.

"Oh it's you." John said in a teasing voice. I tried to not cough up a lung with all that smoke in the room as I stepped inside. I really wish they wouldn't smoke but hey, I didn't judge.

"I got food." I announced, setting the stuff down on the table and grabbing a coffee quickly before everything else was devoured in minutes.

"Hey what took you so long? We were thinking maybe you got lost?" Paul asked. I thought back to my little episode and my eyes fell on all four pairs of eyes looking at me for an answer.

"Um, I guess I'm just not familiar with this place. I got a little turned around, but still found it." I smiled innocently.

"Hm, alright. Well the show starts in half an hour, we're opening y'know." George informed me. I nodded.

"I know." I answered, without really thinking. I caught myself though by quickly adding

"I saw the schedule earlier." Paul kept on looking at me though, trying to capture my attention as I lowered my eyes and took a drink of coffee. The others didn't seem to notice and I was trying to pull myself out of the dumps but nothing seemed to be working. After a moment or so, Paul stood and announced he was going for a short walk and suggested I join him.

"I just got back." I reminded him. He just looked at me with his mesmerizing hazel eyes and I understood. That was code for 'we need to talk' apparently.

"Yeah okay." I agreed, setting my drink down and following him into the hallway.

"Tell me what's wrong." He just came out with it.

"Wrong? Nothing's wrong." I fibbed.

"Ashley, level with me. If you're still feeling bad about last night, we've all forgotten about it." He assured. I shook my head.

"I've forgotten about that too...that isn't it." I looked away. I didn't want to bother him with my menial problems. They were going on the Ed Sullivan show in less than 20 minutes.

"Ashley, something is bothering you." He touched my shoulder lightly.

"It's nothing Paul, I'm just getting down on myself for no reason... I guess I'm just wondering how long I'm gonna be here...you know in this year." I admitted, lowering my voice. He looked around to make sure no one was nearby.

"You're worried you'll never return to the year you came from? That you'll be here forever with us?" He asked. I nodded silently. He chuckled lightly.

"Well I think the lads and I would rather like that, but I understand. You miss your family." He said with a nod.

"Well yes and no...it's complicated, just never mind me. I'll be fine." I shrugged.

"Well alright. Just...keep your chin up and smile, that's the best advice I can give." He smiled kindly.

"You always give good advice." I returned the smile, starting to feel a lot better. We went back to the room where we found the other three getting themselves all put together for their big performance.

"Are you alright, Ashley?" Ringo asked me.

"I'm fine, thanks." I assured him with a warm smile.

"Well Paul you better get a move on because we all know it takes you ten minutes just to do your hair up proper." George teased his mate to which John and I instantly both laughed to which Paul just rolled his eyes.

"Hey, you're as bad as she is!" John jokingly accused, pointing at me.

"I resent that, sir!" I laughed. It felt good to laugh. He just made a face at me. I just shook my head and went to finish my coffee as I watched the four lads flit about like little girls. It was rather amusing watching them all, especially Paul, fix their hair and suits. As they were finishing up, the same tech came back and said they were needed backstage in five.

"Well this is it, lads." Paul chirped, excitement evident in his voice.

"Yeah, let's go." I urged them all, already by the door. The five of us followed the tech to where the band had to wait for their cue. I stood with my back against the wall near the door they'd have to go through to get onstage. John, Paul and George stood with their instruments, Ringo with his drumsticks and they all looked absolutely stoked. I was stoked too.

"So, you guys ready?" I asked.

"Ready as we'll ever be...oh we forgot to tell her!" George realized, suddenly turning to his mates.

"Tell me what?" 

"Oh yeah, we arranged for you to have a front row center seat!" Paul revealed. My mouth literally fell open.

"No way! Thank you so much! I-I figured I'd stay back here and just listen." I gasped, completely surprised.

"That's ridiculous, no you have to be front row center, so we can see you." Ringo winked.

"Well...that makes me feel special." I laughed. Just then, the lads were waved on by a stage crew member to get prepared. The screaming crowd beyond the curtain was almost deafening. I watched as the four of them straightened up, ready to go onstage. Paul leaned over to me and I raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, Paul?" A smile tugged at my lips.

"How's about a little kiss for good luck?" He asked, his eyes positively dancing.

"Paul..." I started.

"Purely platonic, I promise." He raised his hands as his voice lowered. I rolled my eyes.

"Oh for God's sake, fine." I relented, giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

"Good luck." I smiled as he moved on. The other three came towards me then, first George.

"What about me?" He smirked. I sighed and pecked his cheek too.

"And me?" Ringo followed. So him too, they were so getting a kick out of this. Last was John.

"I don't suppose you want one too." My voice oozing with sarcasm.

"Do I look like I need luck?" He smirked.

"I dunno, do you? The other three seem to think I'm pretty damn lucky." I teased. He chuckled lightly.

"Ah what the hell, a little luck never hurt anybody." He decided, so I leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"You'll be wonderful." I told him. And for some reason, I ended up hugging him! I don't know exactly why, and he was surprised at first but then hugged me back quick and kind of awkwardly before pulling back.

"Well I think I'm all lucked up. See ya." He winked before running onstage. I remembered then that was only the second time we'd had any physical contact since I arrived and he wasn't really much of a fan I sensed. But I felt enthralled by that brief embrace. It was special in my mind even if it was nothing in his. Just as I got to my seat, I saw the one and only Ed Sullivan walk onto the stage.

"And now, ladies and gentlemen..." He started. I held my breath.

"The Beatles!" And the crowd went insane as the curtain went up.

 

 

 

 

 


	25. TWENTY FOUR

**TWENTY FOUR:**

**A/N: This chapter is a lot of just song lyrics, I apologize in advance if that's not your thing.  
**

" _Close your eyes and I'll kiss you, Tomorrow I'll miss you_

_Remember I'll always be true_

_And then while I'm away, I'll write home every day_

_And I'll send all my loving to you..._ "

The song started exactly as it had in the videos I'd only watched 100 times back home with Sienna. Watching, I felt a little pang of homesickness but it soon went away as I just focused on the lads up there smashing it.

_"I'll pretend that I'm kissing, the lips I am missing_

_And hope that my dreams will come true_

_And then while I'm away, I'll write home every day_

_And I'll send all my loving to you_

_All my loving I will send to you_

_All my loving, darling I'll be true..."_

The crowd was in absolute hysteria it was kind of hard at times to hear the actual song being played, but it was very exciting.

_"Close your eyes and I'll kiss you, Tomorrow I'll miss you_

_Remember I'll always be true_

_And then while I'm away, I'll write home every day_

_And I'll send all my loving to you_

_All my loving I will send to you_

_All my loving, darling I'll be true_

_All my loving, all my loving ooh_

_All my loving I will send to you..."_

They finished the song and the crowd went wild before they struck up their next number. This one was all Paul.

 

_"There were bells on a hill, But I never heard them ringing_

_No, I never heard them at all_

_Till there was you_

_There were birds in the sky, But I never saw them winging_

_No, I never saw them at all_

_Till there was you_

_Then there was music and wonderful roses_

_They tell me in sweet fragrant meadows_

_Of dawn and dew_

_There was love all around, But I never heard it singing_

_No, I never heard it at all_

_Till there was you_

_Then there was music and wonderful roses_

_They tell me in sweet fragrant meadows_

_Of dawn and dew_

_There was love all around, But I never heard it singing_

_No, I never heard it at all_

_Till there was you_

_Till there was you..."_

I found myself mouthing along the words of those familiar songs just new back then. Again the crowd went bananas and I cheered as well just for fun. The lads were so stoked I could see it radiating off of them. They paused for a moment before the drum beat of the next song began. I grinned, recognizing it instantly. I had a history with this song, as it was the very first one I heard of them years ago after first meeting Sienna.

_"So what makes these fellows so wonderful, I mean besides the fact that you're related to one of them." I asked Sienna one summer afternoon. We were in her backyard under an enormous willow tree. I was sitting with my new best friend just watching the breeze blow the leaves around._

_"What doesn't make them wonderful? I mean, the music was amazing, they were all so handsome... I can't really explain it much but here..." She pulled out her smartphone from her pocket along with the earbuds._

_"Just pick a song from any of theirs and let the music do the explaining." Sienna said. I raised an eyebrow as I took the phone and connected the earphones._

_"Alright, but this is me going on your word here." I said with a light laugh. I scrolled through the list of hundreds of songs until I landed on She Loves You. So I shrugged and pressed it._

_"She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah..." I was sold from then on. It only took that one song._

_"You think you lost your love_

_When I saw her yesterday_

_It's you she's thinking of_

_And she told me what to say_

_She says she loves you_

_And you know that can't be bad_

_Yes, she loves you_

_And you know you should be glad..._ "

I was snapped back to where I was and actually felt tears in my eyes. This song was ultra special. I opened my mouth and sang along.

 

" _She said you hurt her so_

_She almost lost her mind_

_And now she says she knows_

_You're not the hurting kind_

_She says she loves you_

_And you know that can't be bad_

_Yes, she loves you_

_And you know you should be glad, ooh_

_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_And with a love like that_

_You know you should be glad_

_You know it's up to you_

_I think it's only fair_

_Pride can hurt you too_

_Apologize to her_

_Because she loves you_

_And you know that can't be bad_

_Yes, she loves you_

_And you know you should be glad, ooh_

_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_

_With a love like that_

_You know you should be glad_

_With a love like that_

_You know you should be glad_

_With a love like that_

_You know you should be glad_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah..._ "

They finished and took a bow. Everyone there was on their feet and I joined them in cheering. They were incredible. I mean sure I'd seen the videos lots of times but this was different. This was REAL. Deciding to meet them backstage, I jumped up from my seat and darted back to greet them. I saw them come off all smiles and excitement surging through them.

"Hey! That was incredible, guys." I smiled. The lads faced me and kind of did a double take.

"Were you back here the whole time?" Paul asked.

"Nope. I'm fast...I just had to see you guys and say how awesome you were." I gushed, clasping my hands in front of me.

"Well thanks, Ashley. This would be so much harder if you weren't a fan." Paul teased.

"She'd have no choice, Paul...you two actually know one another." George pointed out with a smile. Instantly I remembered our made up story but took it in stride.

"Yeah that is a good point. So now what..." I asked, rocking on my heels a little just feeling jittery with excitement of the evening.

"Well I guess we just get ready for our next set later on. Why don't you just go back to your seat, Ashley and enjoy the show in the meantime. I'm sure you don't want to be bored by us." Paul suggested with a kind smile. I was gonna insist I stay with them, but I thought "When am I ever gonna see the Ed Sullivan show live ever again?

"Alright. Just don't forget about me." I winked.

"Of course not. See you in a while." He answered. So I said bye to the others and headed back to my seat. Paul seemed the most talkative out of the four, I think they were all pretty dazed still from playing in front of millions of Americans on television sets spanning the country. But I wondered about John, he seemed quiet on purpose as he was as talkative as Paul in any circumstance. I wondered if it had anything to do with me, but I didn't want to dwell on that and have it ruin my experience of the show. Back home I'd only ever seen the lads' clips from the show. I kind of almost forgot there was a whole other host of acts to fill the half hour! Needless to say I was mighty entertained by the other acts. The magician was hysterical, the cast from a play called Oliver was incredible and the other little acts were funny as well. I almost lost track of time, just sucked up into the world of wonder before Ed Sullivan came back onstage and re introduced the boys. My attention was refocused as the curtain was drawn back again to reveal the four with their set, smiles wide and the crowd cheering and screaming their names. The music began and I grinned once more, chanting along the lyrics I knew only too well.

_"Well, she was just 17, You know what I mean_

_And the way she looked was way beyond compare_

_So how could I dance with another...Ooh!_

_When I saw her standing there_

_Well she looked at me, and I, I could see_

_That before too long I'd fall in love with her_

_She wouldn't dance with another... Whoo!_

_When I saw her standing there_

_Well, my heart went "boom", When I crossed that room_

_And I held her hand in mine..._

_Whoah, we danced through the night, and we held each other tight_

_And before too long I fell in love with her_

_Now I'll never dance with another... Whooh!_

_Since I saw her standing there_

_Well, my heart went "boom", When I crossed that room_

_And I held her hand in mine..._

_Whoah, we danced through the night, and we held each other tight_

_And before too long I fell in love with her_

_Now I'll never dance with another... Whooh!_

_Since I saw her standing there..."_

Immediately after that, they struck up their final song of the night.

 

" _Oh yeah, I'll tell you something, I think you'll understand_

_When I'll say that something_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_Oh please, say to me_

_You'll let me be your man_

_And please, say to me, You'll let me hold your hand_

_I'll let me hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_And when I touch you I feel happy_

_Inside...It's such a feeling that my love_

_I can't hide_

_I can't hide_

_I can't hide_

_Yeah, you've got that something, I think you'll understand_

_When I'll say that something_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_And when I touch you I feel happy_

_Inside...It's such a feeling that my love_

_I can't hide_

_I can't hide_

_I can't hide_

_Yeah, you've got that something, I think you'll understand_

_When I'll feel that something_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand...."_

They finished with a bow and I was on my feet, ecstatic. They had smashed it, just as I knew they would. They went to shake Ed Sullivan's hand and wave one last time to the crowd before they disappeared backstage. Making sure I wouldn't be followed, I ducked backstage again, greeted by four very hyped lads.

"Woo! You guys rocked!" I exclaimed, clapping my hands happily. They just laughed collectively at my enthusiasm.

"We really did it. We played Ed Sullivan." Paul beamed, suddenly grabbing me in a bear hug. I just laughed at him and hugged him back.

"Well I'm very proud of you, all four of you." I grinned, stepping back.

"This definitely calls for celebration. Who's up for partying?" John suddenly piped up. His mates hooted and hollered in agreement so I went along with it. It was definitely a night to remember.

 

 

 


	26. TWENTY FIVE

**TWENTY FIVE:**

I'm not exactly sure how we ended up here, but it turned out to be an interesting night to say the least. I think one of the producers of the show was holding this after party for all the special guests on the show that night so once we all got out to the car, the driver took us straight there which was about a fifteen-minute drive. The home the party was held in was absolutely monstrous, it kind of reminded me of Sienna's family estate in size. Despite the chilly night, people were all over the outside porch either smoking, drinking or both. The lads were eager beavers to get right into the party and I just blindly followed them up the steps and into the very crowded home. I didn't really feel like partying...after the incident the night before, but I figured I could keep my head, just stay away from anything that looked or smelled like alcohol. John and Paul were instantly captivated by the party scene and soon disappeared into the crowd.

"One of you look after Ashley, will you?" Paul called over his shoulder to George and Ringo before disappearing. George looked to Ringo.

"See ya." Was all he said with a casual wave, before he too disappeared.

"Typical." Ringo muttered, half to himself.

"Hey, you don't have to babysit me you know. You can go off and have fun." I offered. I kinda felt like a fifth wheel in the party scene with these four. Paul and John were always gone before you could blink, George sometimes hung around but then he's see someone that caught his eye and he'd be gone too. Ringo I didn't know much about and I think at times he felt obligated to babysit me, but like the night before, most times I ended up alone. I wasn't complaining, that was just how it always played out.

"Well someone has to keep you out of trouble." He winked at me. I then felt bad, though he'd only been kidding.

"I'll be fine, go have fun." I gave him a little push and he finally went too. So I was alone again, just a seventeen-and-a-half-year-old girl wearing a brunette wig standing against the wall and watching people move slowly by me like molasses. At least I was safe there; or so I thought. About half an hour passed and someone turned music on really loud, especially for that time. Some songs I recognized, they were hits of the day and people started dancing just right where they were. I couldn't help as well just to keep a beat, so much so that I caught the attention of a man with greased hair, at least in his late twenties. He approached me and I felt a little apprehensive.

"Hey baby, what's a beautiful gal like yourself doing glued up to the wall?" He dragged out his American accented words like taffy.

"Observing politely, thank you." I responded after a second. I thought I'd send him off with that comment, but his eyes only lit up.

"You're an English girl! Well if that doesn't make you ten times sexier, I don't know what does." He flashed me a toothy grin.

"I...don't know how to reply to that." I stammered, feeling clearly displeased. I knew his type. Just cruising for easy girls who would buckle with even the slightest of compliments. I was not that girl.

"Well...dance with me, your highness." He seemed to falter but recovered, smiling toothily once again. I wasn't swayed, but I knew deep down, the only way I could get this leech to stay away from me was to give him one dance, then disappear.

"Fine. One dance." I decided, taking his arm as he led me over to the throngs of people dancing to the music. The song stopped and someone started a slow song I didn't recognize.

"C'mon baby, sway with me." He drawled, dancing far too close to me I thought. I tried to just focus on the song instead of this guy who could not keep his eyes or hands off of me. I let him hold me like a man normally would in a slow dance with a woman just to not be difficult, but as the song reached its end, the man's hands traveled downward and my face flushed red as he squeezed my ass!

"Hey!" I shouted, tearing his hands off of me. The music stopped and everyone paused and began talking again as they were waiting for the next record to be put on. My admirer merely looked all the more pleased I'd done that.

"Ooh you're a fiery one aren't you? I like a little fire in my women." He purred, leaning forward to caress my cheek. I took a step backward so he caressed the air instead. 

"Excuse me, I believe our dance is over." I spoke, boldly, preparing to take my leave. But he would not let me leave, as he grabbed my arm and hard too, I might add.

"And where do you think you're going? I thought you could stick around, maybe have a few drinks with me? Come back to my place?" He smiled and it made me feel sick.

"I'm seventeen." I choked.

"Well my compliments to your mother for making one fine young woman." Was his reply. Did my age mean nothing to these people?

"Please let me go." I said, in a much firmer tone.

"I don't think I want to. Stay with me, my English princess. Stay with me and I can show you things you never even would think of." He was really starting to freak me out and I wondered if he was drunk.

"I'd really rather not." I said, trying to pull away from him, which only made him tighten his grasp on my arm. I winced, knowing full well there would be a bruise.

"What's the matter honey? I don't bite." He leaned real close to me and suddenly I could smell brandy on his breath. I knew the smell from back home because dad fancied a good brandy now and then. The smell would have made me homesick if I weren't trying to get away from this maniac. The music started up again and it was this fast paced beat. Everyone started dancing again and my crazy dance partner tried to get me moving with him again. I writhed at his grip, trying frantically to get loose but he was much too strong. And then he yanked me right toward his face and locked me in a disgusting kiss!

 

**George's POV**

 This party wasn't fun for me at all, any girls present were either old, married or too drunk to now their own names. I had been looking for Ashley for a while now but couldn't seem to find her or Ringo. My best guess was that they were just laying low someplace, away from all this noise. But I was mistaken when I saw Ringo by himself, smoking in a corner.

 "Hey, where's Ashley?" I asked loudly, over the music. He shrugged.

 "Haven't seen her. She told me to go have fun. Have you checked with John or Paul?" He answered, taking a long drag on his cigarette.

 "Oh it'd be impossible to find them; they're long gone into girl wonderland. Let's split up, she can't be too far." I suggested. He nodded and took off in one direction and I the other. I wove my way in and out of people dancing and then I saw her. Being held in almost a headlock and forcibly kissed by some over greased pompous, overbearing idiot! I really don't know what came over me, I knew what Ashley and I had was long by the wayside but I couldn't let her be harmed by this man and it looked to me like he was holding her there against her will. Something inside me just snapped and I dove into the crowd and pried Ashley off of the man.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing to her?!" I yelled, obviously louder than I intended to. The music stopped and everyone stopped too.

"Hey what's your problem man, I was just showin' the lady a good time." The man babbled, clearly drunk. Still heated, I jabbed my finger right in his face.

"You keep your goddamn slimy mitts off of her." I warned, my eyes snapping furiously. The man's eyes widened.

"Oh man, is she your girl? I...I didn't know." He suddenly looked frightened for his life. I didn't think I could come off that scary. Ashley stood beside me, within my protective grasp looking rather dazed.

 

**Ashley's POV**

 I was grateful George had stepped in but kind of surprised at how empowered he became. He held me with one arm while threatening the man with his other.

 "Oh man, is she your girl? I...I didn't know." My attacker looked afraid and rightly so! George, that sweet smiley boy looked about ready to kill him!

 "Any decent man wouldn't even try to force himself on a young girl like that!" George wasn't finished.

 "George, let it go. I'm alright." I tried to reason with him, stepping out of his grasp. Just then, I saw Paul, John and Ringo coming towards us. Paul broke into a run when he saw what was going on.

 "What's going on here, what happened?" He demanded. His necktie was pulled loose and off centered which said to me he'd been off somewhere getting a little action. I wasn't the least bit surprised. 

"It's nothing Paul, George, let the man be." I tried to gain control of the situation, but John stepped in.

"Did he hurt you?" He asked me directly, his dark eyes snapping at me.

"A little..." I admitted. John's face then grew indignant and I knew instantly what he was gonna do.

"John, no...no it's not bad, just don't worry about it." I tried to say, but it was too late. John wound up and clocked the guy right in the jaw!

"John!" I cried. Paul touched my shoulder.

"We should get you back." He suggested. Ringo and Paul accompanied me home but George and John stayed to deliver whatever justice they thought that man deserved. I was upset then, a perfect night had to be soiled by one bad egg and two hot heads. Paul and Ringo both knew I was unhappy the whole ride back and even when they offered to stay with me, I passed it off and just went to my room. My arm hurt but I didn't really care as I changed into pajamas and got myself ready for bed. Just as I was about to put my feelings to sleep, there was a knock at my door. Thinking it was probably Paul, I covered myself in my bathrobe and went to open the door. It was George!

"Ashley...did I wake you?" He asked, looking very remorseful.

"No, I was just getting ready for bed. What can I do for you?" I answered, not sure how to speak towards him after what I'd seen him become.

"I...uh...I came to apologize to you for my behavior earlier there. I just assumed you were being hurt and I didn't want you to be hurt." He said, looking at me with sad eyes. He was sorry and I knew deep down he was never like that. He wasn't John who I expected that kind of behavior from, even though it displeased me.

"It's alright, George. Thank you for...you know, stepping in and all." I nodded, forgiving the kind hearted soul. He smiled at me, happy to know I wasn't angry at him.

"Anytime. I should let you sleep." 

"Yeah...John come in with you?" I asked, still mostly displeased at him. There was no reason for him to punch that guy. John always got himself worked up over everything.

"Yeah he did... you saw him hit that guy huh?" 

"Yeah. I did." I simply replied.

"You know he only did it 'cause he cares about you. As crazy as that sounds, John actually cares about you." He told me. Somehow deep down I kind of felt that was the reason but I still was no fan of physical violence. I nodded.

"Goodnight George." I gave him a small smile. He nodded back and took his leave.

"Goodnight Ashley."

 

*********

 

The next morning, we were woken early and told to pack up because We'd be leaving on a train for Washington DC. I'd been woken by the phone next to my bed trilling loudly and Ringo on the other end informing me of this. I knew the first show was in DC but somehow it all had slipped my mind how soon we'd be leaving, especially after the night before. Needless to say I was absolutely exhausted by the time I met the lads in the lobby with my bags.

"Well good morning sleepyhead." Paul teased lightly. I gave him a half smile.

"Morning." I replied. George and Ringo both seemed half asleep still which made me smirk a little but it faded once my gaze met John's for however brief a moment. He was absentmindedly picking at a fingernail and seemed to avoid my eyes. I immediately looked away wondering what his deal was. I was not pleased with him after he chose to become violent with that man at the party, whether he deserved it or not. I'd forgiven George because I knew he was never normally like that. But John had an extremely short fuse and everybody knew that. I shouldn't have let it get to me but it did. I wondered if he'd gotten wind somehow from one of the other three that maybe I was displeased with how he behaved. I mean, it wasn't hard to tell from Paul, George or Ringo that I was pretty peeved. I tried to pass off the awkward silence by clearing my throat to which I saw John come to attention out of the corner of my eye.

"So, what are we waiting for?" I asked, absentmindedly.

"Evidently, the car." John answered me with a bite in his tone of voice. To that I just looked away and adjusted the strap from my bag on my shoulder.

"John, was that necessary?" Paul sighed.

"Just let it be." I said to him under my breath. Silence fell over the five of us again and was broken when George remarked

"The car's here." So we all picked up what was ours and headed out to our ride. I silently slid in and George came beside me with Ringo on the other end which left John and Paul sitting across from me. Lucky for me, John was sitting furthest from me as he wasn't my favourite person still. He was like an active volcano, calm some of the time, but when he erupted, he really did. I felt a pang of guilt at myself for feeling cross at him after we'd been getting on so well, but his behavior was just unacceptable. And if this had to be the way for him to learn, then so be it. I had a feeling he wasn't done with me yet, I pretty much surmised by then that he knew I was unhappy with him and part of me hoped that knowing that just ate at him.

"Come on, guys. Let's cheer up." George broke the silence again as the car took off for the train station. 

"I think it's a little early to be cheery." Paul said. I said nothing, but just turned to stare out the window as New York City passed me by. It kind of sunk in then that in less than twenty years, John would be shot to death just mere streets away from the hotel we stayed at. I'm not sure why it hadn't sunk in earlier, but having it on my mind then when the two of us were at odds just made it feel worse inside. I tore my eyes away from the window to look at John and he was busy staring out his window completely oblivious to my thoughts and what I knew. Words were trying to force their way out of my mouth, somewhat of an apology for being cross with him, but something stopped them and I just went back to staring out the window, becoming lost in my thoughts. The ride to the train station took a little more than half an hour and hardly anybody spoke in all that time. Upon arrival, we were hustled in as quickly as possible and Mr. Epstein was waiting for us. In a matter of minutes, we were aboard the train and I sat near a window just by then in a mood I didn't wish to describe. The lads became chatty after that, but I didn't feel like listening to them. I felt really strange and I didn't know if it was my thoughts getting to me or if I was just tired. I just sort of zoned out and took my notebook out of my bag along with a pen I'd picked up at the hotel.

 

_February 10, 1964_

_Well the Ed Sullivan show happened, it was just as amazing as I already knew, but ten times better having seen it live and not as a grainy black and white video on the internet. It still seems surreal to me that I actually am here and living this. After the show, we were all invited to this party thing at someone's house. Totally not the best way to end the night because most men in this era are either way too polite or just absolute vultures. Such was the case with one man at that party, glued himself to me and wouldn't let me go. He was absolutely disgusting and I think he would have had his way with me had George not stepped in. While I admired his heroism, what followed was not the best end to the evening. I've never seen George that angry before. But I suppose it was for good reason, that man could have hurt me after all. But how John chose to deal with the situation was the worst of all. I don't understand. He's such a wonderful person and we're finally connecting. But then he goes and pulls a hot headed stunt like this and I wonder which is the real him? Perhaps I'll never know..._

I looked up after a while and snapped my book closed. Everyone had fallen silent again and for some reason now, it was deafening. I felt I had to say something, but I didn't know what. Ringo was next to me and turned to face me.

 "What's with you this morning? Cat got your tongue?" He tried to get me to smile. I shrugged.

 "Just tired I guess." I replied.

 "Well I would think so; that's quite the night you had there, last night." Paul remarked.

 "Yeah, it was busy. But I'll remember it forever." I tried to put a positive spin on at least the first half of the evening which was, in truth, exceptional.

 "I hope what happened after the show won't scare you away." George spoke up. I just shrugged again.

 "It was fine. It was handled and that's that." I answered, making brief eye contact with John who abruptly stood up and left the car. It fell silent a moment before Paul asked

 "What's with him?" I bit my lip and stood as well.

 "Let me go talk to him." I offered, even though right now, I was pretty sure I was opening myself up to ridicule from him, but the words I'd been trying to formulate to him for the past several hours were finally on the tip of my tongue. The other three didn't say anything as I got up and walked out and down the corridor looking for John. I found him at the end of the hall by a window looking out of it and smoking. I felt slightly nervous as I approached him, wondering how much of a volcano I was in for, but I finally opened my mouth.

 "Hey. I was wondering where you went." I approached him cautiously. He didn't move except for taking a drag on his cigarette.

 "What do you want, Ashley?" His tone was emotionless.

 "I just wanted to see if you were okay. You've hardly spoken a word since last night." I replied. He turned then and looked about ready to shoot me down until his gaze met mine and he sighed.

 "You saw what I did last night." He finally said, turning back to the window. I coughed lightly at the puffs of smoke around him and I, but stepped closer.

 "Yeah, I saw." I answered.

 "I'm not that great with words, Ashley, I just beat myself up inside." He confessed.

 "Oh nonsense, you're wonderful with words. You just deal with problems differently than most and that's okay. And you don't need to beat yourself up for last night. I'm over it." That was the truth. He sighed again and paused for quite a while before he spoke again.

 "It's not just that. Since you've been here with Paul, I've been mostly just an ass to you and all you've seen is the rotten side of me. I thought I was getting better but last night...I guess I thought that guy was gonna hurt you or he already had...and Ashley..." He turned to me while speaking but got flustered halfway through and turned a little pink. He turned away again clearly embarrassed by what he was about to say.

 "Never mind." He muttered. I reached out and touched his shoulder to which he jumped and I took my hand back.

 "Just tell me. It's me." I urged, with a reassuring smile. He still didn't tear his gaze from the window but he said

 "You're really important to me Ashley Bunting and I'd kill myself if anything happened to you, okay?" I was stunned at the remark. The way he delivered it wasn't any surprise; he was known for being brash in his speech but seriously? He'd said such a deep and meaningful thing to me. I was almost brought to tears. This is what I'd longed for. George was right when he said John actually cared about me. I sort of had the notion but this just took it to a whole new level. I honestly felt in that moment that I'd accomplished what I believed I'd been sent here for. Before I realized it, I was hugging John the tightest I'd ever. I knew he wasn't overly comfortable with any of that but I didn't care. He didn't move for a really long time but just as I was about to awkwardly let go; he hugged me back. I felt tears threatening for many reasons and though I was nearly choking from the odor of the cigarette smoke, I didn't want that moment to end.

"Thank you." I was finally able to say. He let go of me then and I took a few step backward suddenly blushing for some unknown reason. I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear nervously.

"Why are you saying thank you?" He asked looking rather unfazed. I think I was just overwhelmed by what had just happened. What I said next had to take some thought. I couldn't just say _'I'm from the future and hey guess what? We're related you and I but you're dead in my future and all I wanted was to feel some sort of strong connection to you in your time and I think that's why I'm here in the first place...so yeah now you've told me that I mean a lot to you and all you want to do is protect me I'll just be going forward 50 some odd years to my own timeline now..._ ' No way. That'd be crazy. I paused for several minutes before I found the words to say.

"I know we've been a little rocky, you and I and I know you've tried to show me you aren't an egotistical menace of a man..." I trailed off and smiled a little to show him I didn't mean the insult.

"And we've had some good moments. I feel like I know the real you now. You're still worried that all I'll ever remember about you would be the bad things. But the truth is, I never will. You say that I'm important to you. That's probably the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me. You think you're no good with words, but you're terrific. And you know what? You're important to me too. And I'd do absolutely everything in my power to protect you too. I think you and I are more alike than you realize." I said. Most of that had deeper meaning for my own part, but I thought it was a good speech. He nodded slowly.

"Alright, lets get away from the sappy stuff now." He said, cracking a smile. But I knew he meant to say something like ' _thanks'_ or ' _you're one of the few people to believe in me'._ But it was okay.

"Very well." I chuckled, standing next to him at the window again, the two of us just silently watching the world go by. After several minutes though, something incredibly strange and kind of scary happened. I started feeling really dizzy and my vision was getting very fuzzy.

"What's going on?" I thought. At first, I thought it was the cigarette smoke but aside from a general dislike of the smell, I never really had a problem with it... I gripped the lip of the window sill to try and ground myself but it did no good. I felt my knees go and heard a thud as my own body hit the floor. Through my terrible fuzzed vision, I saw John over me saying my name over and over but it was inaudible to my ears.

"This has got to be a time travel thing." I thought, as crazy as it sounded. The last words I could get out of my mouth were

"Get Paul." Before I completely blacked out.

 


	27. TWENTY SIX

**TWENTY SIX:**

"Ashley...Ashley?" My name being called sounded incredibly echoed to my ears.

 "What happened?" My mouth felt like it was full of marbles. I forced my eyes open and the fuzzy vision was back. I blinked a few times before I discerned the brown blob in front of me was Paul. I was on the train still but in what seemed to be an infirmary of some sort.

 "Are you alright?" Paul asked me; I'd clearly scared the living hell out of him. I sat up slowly because I was laying on some kind of cot and my head felt as bad as it did when I had that hangover. Maybe a little worse.

 "Um, yeah I'll be okay. What happened?" I asked again.

 "I dunno. You left to have a chat with John and the next thing I know, he's runnin' back to the car with the fear of God in his eyes, saying that you'd passed out and he didn't know why and that you'd asked for me before blacking out. By the time we all got back to where you went down, other people were taking you to this room." He explained. I buried my face in my hands, trying to stop the throbbing in my head.

"I think it has to do with the fact that I'm not supposed to be here. I don't belong here." I sighed.

"I-I don't understand...you're saying that you're trying to get back to 2015?" He wondered. I shrugged.

"I'm not trying anything. I'm new to this whole prospect. I had a great talk with John and we finally were connecting. Everything was fine and then it wasn't..." It didn't make a ton of sense to me. Paul looked deep in thought but he seemed lost.

"I don't know, maybe I'm just overtired. I hate to be a bother." I groaned.

"You're not a bother, Ashley. We're all concerned about you. Are you sure you're alright?" He fretted. I really didn't feel well still but I said

"I feel better now. Let's just hope it was a fluke thing." I nodded, hopping down off the cot and masking a wince.

"Yeah..." Paul didn't look convinced but he let me leave anyway. I walked back to our car where the other three were. They all looked, as Paul and I returned.

"Ashley, are you alright?" George asked immediately. I waved my hand.

"I'm fine guys. Girls faint all the time; you should be used to that by now." I made a little joke out of what seemed in my head like a much bigger situation. Three out of four laughed a little over that one but John was silent again. I recalled what Paul had said, how scared he looked. I mentally face palmed. We'd taken a huge step forward he and I just moments ago and now it seemed we were right back to where we started. But by all accounts, he could brood if he needed to. I suppose I'd be scared silly too if like say Sienna had suddenly just dropped at my feet. Thinking about her suddenly gave me a pang of homesickness. I really wished she was on this adventure with me. I think it would have been a lot more fun. I just fell quiet after that, thinking about home and what exactly had happened to me. My outstanding theory was that connection moment I'd had with my grandfather was the trigger to send me home. But I wasn't ready to go home yet. I had so much more I wanted to see and accomplish with the lads. I missed home terribly and my parents since I left on bad terms with them and I missed my best friend. But this place needed me more right now. I was special to each of the lads now and I couldn't leave them without any explanation. I had to fight these feelings, no matter if they returned or if they got progressively worse. It gave me a little bit of hope thought that I wouldn't be stuck here for all eternity but as much as I appreciated that, I so did not want to leave yet.

 

********

 

The echoes of screams as our train stopped at the station was indication enough of what was to come. I smirked a little to myself just feeling a flow of pride rush through my veins.

"I guess that means we've arrived." Paul said, only half joking. The lads all got up and made ready to make a speedy exit. Mr. Epstein appeared in the doorway giving his clients the same speech he had when we arrived off the airplane in New York. I fixed my wig into place and made sure my disguise was up to snuff before we all exited the train.

"Here." I heard George say as he grabbed my hand. I looked up at him.

"Just in case it's crazy out there." I just nodded as we exited through the open car door. The screams were deafeningly loud; maybe louder than New York. I watched the boys as they were all looking around, laughing and talking over the crowd, even John which I was pleased to see his mood had broken again. I'd still need to talk to him later. I didn't want him thinking I passed out because of him. George still held onto my hand tight and I appreciated that because I was getting bulldozed by girls trying to get to the four lads. A car pulled up, it's tires screeching to a halt and the door was thrown open. All five of us dove in, the door was slammed shut and we all took off away from the station.

"Well!" I exclaimed, fixing my hair.

"Too exciting for you?" Paul smirked.

"Oh no not at all. It's just a little crazy." I chuckled. I noticed then that George was still holding onto my hand. I think the others noticed by then too.

"Hey George?" I said. He looked over.

"Yeah?" He replied. I nodded to our hands.

"I think I'm safe now." I was only teasing, but he reddened and I immediately felt bad.

"Oh-oh yeah, sorry." He stammered, letting go of my hand. Ringo snorted with a small laugh but Paul and John seemed otherwise disinterested. I felt silly, we had sort of a small past and back in this day and age, hand holding was much bigger than it was in the future. I know he meant to just make sure I wasn't separated from the group, but now I'd just gone and made is awkward for him.

"Way to go Ash." I thought, sarcastically.

 

*********

 

We were instantly busy once we reached the hotel. I just took off to unpack, my mind still on my little episode. My room was as fine as the one in New York had been, maybe even finer but my excitement had dwindled. And it shouldn't have, I had a good talk with John we were finally connecting past him just teasing me and stuff. Of course I didn't mind the teasing but I felt I was here for more than just that. My head was going over a lot of things, like the train episode, what John had told me again, the awkward moment with George...and I didn't realize I'd been folding the same sweater over and over about five times until it was just a crumpled mess of a garment.

"Oh snap out of it Ashley." I grumbled to myself. Suddenly, there was a brisk knock on my door. I dropped the sweater onto the bed, pretty much giving up on it and absentmindedly went to open the door.

"J-John...oh, what's up?" I stammered, thrown completely off guard and coming off sounding like a babbling idiot. He smirked at me.

"What's got you so tongue tied?" He asked like he hadn't a care in the world. I dragged a hand through my dark hair.

"Um...nothing, my brain was elsewhere." I answered, trying to regain my composure.

"I can tell. Listen, about what happened on the train..." He started, getting serious all of a sudden.

"Don't worry about it. It was nothing." I jumped in.

"You sure? I know Paul was pretty worried." He pressed which seemed a little unlike him.

"I'm fine...could have been motion sickness for all I know." I shrugged, coming up with something off the top of my head. He nodded.

"Right...anyway we're going out before we have to be confined to a building." He moved on, his eyes now twinkling mischievously.

"Figured you'd wanna come."

"Oh yeah, for sure." I agreed happily, just glad we were back. My scrambled thoughts seemed to vanish once I donned my coat and disguise wig. I was sure fresh air and hanging out would maybe cheer me up.

"Ready when you are." I chirped, in a cheerful voice as I buttoned up my coat. I followed John downstairs to the lobby where everyone else was waiting.

"Ashley, are you feeling alright?" Paul asked. I nodded.

"I'm fine." I seemed to be saying that a lot.

"You were awful quiet after you came back from the infirmary." Ringo piped up.

"She said she was fine, why keep pressing her about it?" John remarked.

The other three didn't know how to respond to that.

"Look guys, I promise what happened on the train won't be happening again. Now let's just go out and see some of the city and just have a good time." I told them all straight up.

"Ah what the hell, listen to the girl. Let's go." Ringo smiled, flashing me a wink. I smiled back. The others complied readily as we headed out the door. As I walked out, someone touched my shoulder. I turned to see it was George.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked him.

"I...wanted to apologize if I made thinks awkward." He came out with it. I stopped with him outside the doorway.

"Oh George, no don't apologize. Listen, we're good. You've become my dear friend and I wouldn't trade you for anything. Now let's go join the others." I smiled. The words just came to me. He smiled back.

"Alright." He agreed.

"Hey, are you two comin' or what?" John called from the edge of the sidewalk.

"Yeah, we're coming!" I called back as George and I headed over to the group.

"What was that all about?" Paul asked, nodding to George and I. I waved my hand.

"Nothing, just got distracted." I replied. He looked a little bit like he was jealous for a second... I couldn't figure out why at the time.

"Well then, let's go." Ringo piped up, keeping us all focused on our little outing. So that's what we did. I have to say, sightseeing was one of my most favourite parts of a vacation; or in this case, a tour. Everybody's mood including mine seemed to pick up as we wandered around the town, popping into random shops and just chatting it up. A few older people pointed and whispered among themselves when they saw the four, but they weren't about to chase after them. We hadn't gotten chased by crazy fans since Paul and I were chased back home, when I injured myself.

"Hey Ashley, how's this look?" Ringo asked me as we were all crowded into some cheap clothing store. He appeared wearing a big old top hat that pushed his bangs over his eyes. I laughed at him.

"You look rather distinguished I would say." I replied. John looked over and laughed as well.

"Is that you under there?" He teased his band mate, flipping his bangs upward to reveal his hidden eyes. We were just completely goofing off and it felt goof to be goofy because my mind had been occupied with much heavier things as of late. Ringo decided against the hat, even though John and I did keep assuring him he'd pull it off if he got a haircut (joking of course) and purchased a more 'sensible' hat I suppose, just to keep warm against the cold air. As we exited that shop though, I noticed Ringo wasn't the only one with a paper bag from that shop. John had one as well.

"What pray tell did you pick up in there?" I wondered. Paul and George who hadn't been witness to the first hat choice obviously didn't really get what happened next. John reached into the bag and pulled out the very same top hat!

"You seemed to like it. Besides, I wanna see what this looks like on you." He grinned like a mischievous idiot. I just started laughing and took the hat, setting it on my head on top of the brunette wig. Ringo and John both started laughing at the sight but I had no idea just how silly I looked because there were no mirrors around.

"I-I don't understand. What's got you three so giggly?" Poor Paul was so confused. We paused for a second and looked at one another before dissolving into laughter once again.

"I think they've lost it." Paul commented to George who just smirked. Oh it was awesome. You know those moments you have with your like best friend or something? Those moments where you just say one thing and you're laughing about it for hours? Sienna and I had those all the time and I would feel confident in saying that's exactly what happened here. We were about to continue on our little escapade when it started.

"Is that?..." I suddenly heard a female voice.

"Uh oh." I thought.

"It's them! It's the Beatles!" Another girl screeched. The lads spun around to see a group of girls, their mouths hung open in shock.

"Uh...run?" I suggested. I didn't have to repeat myself. All five of us took off in the opposite direction and me of course, I was in stupid high heels again!

"Do I never learn?" I thought. The screams of the fan-girls echoed down the street. No one dared look back, but I was stumbling on those damned shoes and trying to take them off while running...with little to no luck... Suddenly, I heard John's voice over the screaming fans.

"Get on my back!" He called. I looked up at him incredulous.

"What?!" He seriously wanted to give me a piggyback?

"For God's sake Ashley, just do it!" He laughed, grabbing my arm. The next thing I knew, I was getting a piggyback from John Lennon! I felt slightly foolish but it was mostly really funny. I held on for dear life as we navigated the streets.

"Over here!" I heard Paul shout and we all ducked into an alleyway. The screaming girls ran right past us. The lads were all breathless and rightfully so!

"Guess you guys get sick of this pretty quick eh?" I asked, still aboard my 'steed.' The other three noticed by then and George and Ringo were both muffling laughs.

"Oh I dunno it's kinda fun." George laughed. Paul looked at John and I quizzically.

"What are you two doing?" He asked.

"She had those heel shoes on, I didn't want her hurting her ankle again." John answered in a kind of 'well duh' voice. He let me down and I realized I still had that silly top hat on, which made the situation that much funnier. Paul tried to look amused, but I could tell something was up with him. I wanted to know what.

 

*********

 

Our free time was cut too short all too soon. Before we knew it, Paul had made us all go back to the hotel to be on time for the car to take us to the stadium. Personally, I wanted to rest a little; I was all laughed out, but in the life of the Beatles, there was little to no time for a rest. We made it back to the hotel just as our car pulled up and we were off. We were all still pretty chatty, which was nice and I was getting excited again to see the boys perform once more. It was funny, I didn't realize I was still wearing that goofy top hat of mine until John, sitting opposite me whisked the hat off my head before opening the car door. I stifled a laugh.

"You'd look kind of silly walking in here with that on." He remarked with a smirk.

"Yeah, because it didn't look silly before." Paul replied. I wasn't sure if he was kidding or not, but I didn't have much time to react before the screams started of all the girls trying to shove past the officers on duty to try and keep the crowd at bay. Walking into the building was mostly a blur, I was trying my hardest not to get trampled or separated. By the time we got inside, my ears were ringing from the screaming crowd.

"Do you think that's a bigger crowd than New York?" George asked.

"Oh definitely. New York was just a television performance; this is the real deal." I grinned in reply. Of course, I had the advantage of actually knowing the numbers from each show, but he didn't have to know that.

"Here." John suddenly came up and plunked the hat back on my head. I started laughing.

"That's gonna be the joke of the day, now isn't it?" I teased, raising the brim to look at him more clearly. He was amused.

"I think it should last longer than a day, what do you think?" He nudged Paul who was silent.

"Sure." He shrugged, seemingly in a funk. What was up with him? I didn't like seeing him sad, or down. I hung back as the other three went ahead, talking away.

"Hey." I said quietly, taking the hat off.

"Hey, Ashley." Was his quiet reply.

"Are you okay? You've been pretty quiet all day." I asked. He looked at me.

"I-I'm fine, don't worry." He gave me a smile that wasn't all too convincing.

"C'mon, we're friends. If something is bothering you, you can tell me." I tried to get him to open up. He just shook his head.

"I can't." Was his reply. I was desperate to get a smile out of him so I took the top hat and placed it on his head. I giggled like a kid, trying to get him to at least crack a smile.

"Come on, it's funny." I urged him. He paused and I wondered if he was just going to leave, but then he tipped the hat like a gentleman and said

"Pleased to make your acquaintance, miss Ashley." In a funny accented voice. I laughed.

"See? Life isn't all that bad." I smiled, taking the hat back and giving him a kiss on the cheek.

"Hey, are you coming?" John called from down the hall. I looked up and smiled.

"Yeah, you bet." I said, taking off at a jog to catch up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	28. TWENTY SEVEN

**TWENTY EIGHT**

I was immediately swept into the excitement of the night and almost completely forgot about Paul and how he didn't seem right. I just went on my merry way, carrying on and having a blast as I helped the band get set up and prepared for their big night. Ringo was snapping away at his camera, John and George were busy tuning up and regaling me with endless stories of playing the Cavern club in Germany, most of which I knew but it was amazing to hear these stories from 'the horse's mouth' so to speak. Paul though was still keeping to himself, in the corner of the room tuning up his bass. I nudged George in the arm.

"Hey, either of you know what's up with Paul?" I asked.

"How do you mean?" George replied.

"Well, I don't know, he just seems sort of like a sad little puppy is all." I didn't know how else to describe it.

"What are we talking about?" Ringo wondered, coming around to us from putting away his camera.

"Ashley's wondering why Paul is upset." John remarked. Ringo gave me a look.

"You mean you don't know?" He asked. I shrugged.

"Ashley, he likes you." He stated. The four of us fell silent.

"O-of course he likes me, we're friends. I like all of you." I stammered, though I knew what Ringo meant.

"I think what our little friend means is that Paul fancies you." John seemed amused by the notion, go figure. My hands went clammy and I could hear my heartbeat in my ears. Oh no, no, no, no this was not good. I'd been down this road with him before and we both agreed to stay friends. What on earth changed? I couldn't return the feelings, I learned that the hard way with George. Plus, this was my best friend's grandfather we were talking about! It was different with George, I had to correlation to him in my future. But with Paul...that would be disastrous. It wasn't like I didn't fancy him...I mean hello, have you seen him? I think every fan fancied Paul but this...this could not happen. All these different things started whipping through my mind and my face felt hot.

"Aw... look at her, she's blushing!" John teased, which snapped me back to reality.

"Hey, Shh!" I felt foolish. I knew I had to talk to Paul, but that might involve breaking his heart! I didn't want to do that! I didn't know just how he felt or if he was actually, you know, in love with me...oh God I hoped not...

"Y'know it makes sense, you and he have known one another longer than say we've known you." Ringo pointed out. That didn't make the situation any easier. Yes, collectively I'd known Paul longer...this version of him maybe an hour or two longer than the others, but to him I was still this strange girl he found wandering aimlessly though London who said she was from fifty years in the future.

"Um, yeah. I guess so." Was all I could get out of my mouth.

"Hey, what are you four on about?" Paul's voice nearly made me jump out of my skin as he came over with his bass. John looked about to spill everything, but I shot him a murderous glare that shut him up. I did not want to start this now.

"Oh nothing, just teasing Ashley." George spoke up.

"Well that's not very nice." He replied, looking at me. I felt my heart skip a beat. What was going on with me?

"I don't mind." I replied, weakly. My gaze met his and I got butterflies.

"Stop it. This is insane, this is absolutely crazy! You can't deal with this; he has to know..." I thought. But what could I say to him so that he'd understand that nothing could happen between us?

_"Hi yeah, listen, I'm your granddaughter's best friend and if we got together, it might endanger her whole existence..._ " Did I want to sound like a mental patient? Even if he did believe me, that would be me divulging things about a future that technically hadn't happened yet! This time travel stuff was so backwards and complicated...

"Where's the Doctor when you need him?" I thought, only half joking. Of course thinking about that, it got me thinking about everything else. Why I was here, John's inevitable murder only a decade and a bit away from now... how I might never get home again and live out my life 50 years before I was even supposed to exist... I started feeling dizzy again.

"Oh great, not this again..." I stood from my spot as steadily as I could.

"Ashley? Are you okay?" George asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just need a walk...you know to stretch my legs." I answered, smiling as normally as I could. I avoided Paul's glance as I turned on my heel and briskly walked from the room. I could feel my heart pounding in my ears again as I just kept moving forward.

"Breathe Ash, you're getting too worked up..." I don't think I'd ever had so many panic attacks before.

"Well to be fair, all of this is basically impossible to begin with..." I muttered to myself. Things were fine, I was on tour with the boys, John and I were making nice, I was having a lot of fun...and suddenly I wasn't.

"He can't like me...seriously, he's supposed to be involved with Jane Asher by now and John is supposed to be married..." I started feeling clammy. I was interfering with how history was supposed to go, and now that Paul apparently liked me, who knows how much worse this was screwing things up?

"Maybe I've already endangered Sienna's history or her existence at all..." I thought worriedly as I found the ladies room and stood facing the mirror. I was still in my brunette disguise wig and I'd done my makeup according to how it was done in the sixties. I barely recognized myself.

"This is crazy." I repeated for the hundredth time. I removed the wig and let my black hair tumble down around my shoulders.

"For God's sake, Ash. Pull yourself together." I mumbled, burying my face in my hands. I had to tell Paul something... something that wouldn't break his heart. That would be rather difficult. I mean, he knew I was from the future, but that was it. Would it be crazy if I just told him everything?

"Yes, you fool...you can't tell him any of that." I thought. But what was the real harm if he knew that I knew him in my future?

"Um...he'd think you were crazy!" My mind yelled. But would he really? I mean, the guy met me wandering around London like I'd been struck with amnesia and believed my tale about being from the year 2015. Who's to say what else he'd believe?

"Besides, it's not like I'm telling him everything. He can know that I know his granddaughter, then maybe he'll be waiting for her when she finally arrives." I thought. I'd wait till after the show to talk to him though, I didn't want to dump all of that on him before he had to go onstage. I nodded to myself in the mirror.

"This'll be okay." I said to myself, taking a deep breath and feeling my nerves calm. I fixed the wig back onto my head and exited the bathroom.

"There you are." A voice startled me and I turned to see none other than Paul himself. I bit my lip, suddenly second guessing my decision.

"Hey, you were looking for me?" I asked, trying to be casual.

"Well you did run off like a scalded cat, I wondered if you were okay." He replied, coming closer.

"Yeah I'm fine, you know me." I chuckled lightly.

"Well, the show is gonna start soon, I figured you wouldn't want to miss it." He smiled. I nodded.

"Oh yeah, absolutely I don't want to miss it." I said, realizing how dumb I sounded. I walked alongside him in awkward silence for a bit, just searching for the right words.

"Um, listen...maybe after the show do you want to pick a time and go have a coffee...just the two of us?" I finally said before I realized how double edged it sounded. He looked at me almost surprised.

"Ashley Bunting, are you asking me out?" He teased. My fake last name still struck a chord with me, but I couldn't dwell on that right then.

"Great, now he thinks it's a date." I thought, scrambling to fix it.

"Just to coffee... you don't have to, I just thought it's been a while since you and I were alone..."

"Seriously, stop talking now." I thought, mentally face-palming. He touched my shoulder.

"Coffee would be great. How about tomorrow morning?" He suggested. I nodded.

"That works." I answered. Now I had to find the proper words to tell him...and just hope it went over well. For now, though, I could put those thoughts away and enjoy the music.

 

***********

 

I enjoyed the concert, I really did. I was front row in among all the screaming hysterical girls but it was fun. My thoughts did dissipate for that time being as I just enjoyed the music that would make history. The crowd was insanely loud and I knew it'd only get. bigger and louder as the years went by. But this was just the beginning, the boys were still living it up and loving every second. Right after the show was over, I barrelled backstage to help them make their getaway before the fans stormed the place looking for them (yes this really would happen according to stories).

"Were we any good?" George asked jokingly, as we packed up and headed out front to the waiting car.

"Of course you were! You guys are always good." I said, genuinely.

"See this is why we keep you around, Ashley. For morale." John teased as we made it into the car. I swatted him.

"Gee, I really feel appreciated." I teased back. He just made a face at me so I returned one back.

"You two, honestly." Paul shook his head, amused at us both. He seemed better than he had been, less sad puppy and more relaxed.

"What?" I asked innocently.

"What Paul means is you two act like an old married couple." Ringo said, clearly joking, but I felt my face go red. No we didn't! John and I had finally found a place where we were friends, pals, and we didn't fight anymore like the old days. We weren't like an old married couple because firstly, okay gross! And secondly, I could never treat him like anything less than an annoying older brother.

"Oh?" I chuckled, nonchalantly while my thoughts were raging.

"Well what do you think, dear? Are we gonna take that kind of talk?" John asked me, in a funny voice. I snorted and decided to play along.

"Don't you talk to my husband like that." I chided jokingly in an old lady sounding voice. As completely and utterly wrong the notion even was, I had to admit it was pretty silly. The other three just laughed at our antics, even Paul which made me wonder if he was over his funk completely.

"Is coffee tomorrow even necessary now?" I thought.

"Just go and deal with it if it comes up." I decided. I pulled my bag onto my lap as the car cruised through the city streets and remembered what I had put in there. Smiling mischievously, I reached in and pulled back out the top hat!

"Hey..." I said to John who was looking out the window. He turned just as I plunked the top hat back on his head.

"You forgot this." I giggled.

 

*********

 

The morning came all too quickly. After getting dropped back at the hotel, surprisingly everybody wanted to call it in early. I knew we were heading back to New York the next day for another show, but not until much later in the day. Still, who was I to argue if they all wanted to turn in early? We all had a full day after all. I was in a pretty good mood as I got ready for bed that night, I donned a pair of pretty satin pajamas I had gotten especially for this trip and turned down the bed covers before crawling in and shutting off the lamp. It had been a really good show as usual, but my mind was wandering far away from that. My thoughts journeyed back to earlier in the day with Paul and I laid awake just mulling over in my head what I wanted to say to him tomorrow

"So listen, I can't help but notice that you seem to have a thing for me..." I said out loud to myself.

"No, that sounds stupid." I muttered.

"We can't be together. Why? Because I'm from the future." Which sounded dumber? To be fair, this wasn't an easy situation.

"Remember earlier, he might be fine now. This all might not even be necessary." I thought. I hoped I was right, but something told me I wasn't

 

 

 

 

 


	29. TWENTY EIGHT

**TWENTY EIGHT:**

Morning came quickly and I woke up to the sunlight tickling my eyelids. I looked at the time and it was just after seven thirty in the morning. I knew I had to get up at some point and face the day, so I dragged myself into the shower and got ready by eight. I was wearing a simple grey dress and flat shoes. I didn't want to overdress for coffee after all. Just as I was fixing my wig onto my head, there was a knock at my door. I knew it was Paul, but I didn't expect him to 'pick me up'. Still though, I forced a smile onto my face and opened the door.

"Morning." I cheerfully chirped.

"Good morning, you look nice." He complimented. Okay, so far this was sounding awful like a date.

"Um, thanks...you too..." I replied awkwardly. I stepped out of the room and closed the door behind me, double checking I had my room key in my coat pocket.

"So...I didn't even check to see if there was a coffee place even around here." I admitted after a moment of silence.

"Don't worry, I did. There's a nice place about a block from here." He spoke up as we went downstairs to the lobby. That made me feel a little nervous.

"This isn't a date." I thought.

"So... are the others awake?" I tried to change the subject.

"George was; the other two were asleep." Paul answered.

"Oh, did George know where you were going?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

"I mentioned I was going out with you." Was the answer. I nearly tripped over my own two feet.

"Okay we gotta resolve this right now." I thought.

"Listen Paul, I think we need to talk." I started as the crisp winter air hit my face.

"Talk? What about?" He asked, turning his hazel gaze toward me. I took a breath, suddenly at a loss for words.

"Geez it's chilly out here." I tried to change the subject, feeling nervous again.

"Oh, do you want my coat?" He offered. Why was he so sweet?

"No, no I'll be alright." I scrambled.

"So what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" He came right back around to the subject I was suddenly sorry I brought up.

"Um... Sienna." I responded, stupidly.

"Sienna? Your friend Sienna?" He clarified. I felt warm all of a sudden even though it was most definitely below zero outside.

"Uh yeah...do you know she wants to write music too?" I searched for something to say.

"Oh really, like you? You two should start a band." He joked.

"We might... We both say we want to come to America when we finish school. I guess I can tell her when I go back home that I beat her to it." I started to relax a little, but Paul fell quiet as we walked.

"What's up?" I asked after a moment.

"I just keep forgetting you're not from this time." He replied, somewhat sadly.

"Oh...yeah sometimes I do too, I'm getting used to living like this." I chuckled.

"So when do you figure you'll go back to where you belong?" He asked, the sad puppy look back again.

"Um, I'm not sure. I don't even know how I'd know. Who knows, maybe I'm stuck here indefinitely." I half joked.

"Well that would be fun, but not so good for you, you have a life of your own back in the future." Paul mused, half to me, half to himself I think.

"Well, what matters is I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." I tried to get him to cheer up again. He nodded silently as we entered the coffee shop. He told me to just got sit and he'd get me something. I wasn't picky so I just told him to surprise me as I found a seat. The shop was pretty empty for a morning, but it was probably better that way, less chance of Paul being noticed. I sat back and silently cursed myself though for chickening out on telling Paul what I wanted to talk to him about.

"No more dodging, just do it." I thought as he came over moments later with two steaming cups. Mine looked interesting, whatever it was, it was buried under layers of whipped cream.

"Wow, look at this thing." I laughed, dipping my finger into the whipped cream.

"It's a little adventurous I know, but it looked fun." Paul replied, a twinkle in his eye. I smiled and took a sip of the drink. It was sweet but definitely coffee.

"Wow, that's interesting." I giggled, setting it down. Paul was trying not to laugh, but I knew he was ultimately failing.

"I've got whipped cream on my nose, don't I?" I asked.

"And your eyelashes." He finally laughed. I laughed too as I took a napkin and cleaned myself up.

"You should do that more." He said.

"What, face plant some whipped cream?" I laughed.

"No, laugh. You have a really nice laugh." He said in all seriousness. My smile went away.

"Well um...given all the crying I did when we first met I suppose a laugh is a nice alternative." I tried to keep the conversion neutral.

"Yeah...hard to believe how far you've come with us in just a few months." He agreed.

"Especially with John, I thought I was not going to get on with him at all but we're doing great now and I really love that." I remarked.

"Right...so when are you gonna tell him?" Paul asked, looking sad again. I was confused.

"Tell him? What do I need to tell him?" I worried that somehow maybe I had subconsciously told Paul who I really was or something.

"Oh come on, Ashley, everybody knows you and John are inseparable these days. You two flirt back and forth all the time, I think George and Ringo have a bet going on who kisses who first." Paul explained. I nearly spit out my drink.

"What?" I was flabbergasted.

"You're saying it's not true?" He asked.

"Oh my God is it ever not true! John and I are friends. I could never think of him as anything more. We're inseparable yes, but because we're so alike. I'm not in love with him though, and I never will be." I assured Paul. I couldn't believe they all thought that... but then I remembered the 'old married couple' joke from the night before. But no, no way was I in love with him...again, _gross_! I was proud of how far we'd come, from the days where John would snap at me and make me feel like dirt to now where he was so protective over me like an older brother would be... I was ever so happy with where we were now, but the others had to know I was most certainly not pursuing him.

"Well, I guess that bet's off." Paul joked, looking relaxed again. Oh why didn't he just come out and say it? Now that Ringo had pointed it out, I could totally see it. Paul was so fawning after me and had been for some time. I wondered even if I broke it to him lightly if he'd be okay.

"I would hope so." I chuckled. We fell silent again for a moment and I decided it was a good a time as any. I set down my cup and cleared my throat.

"So, listen...about my friend Sienna..." I started.

"Yeah?" He asked. The words were like marbles in my mouth.

"Why is this so hard?" I thought. I'd never had to reject a guy before, much less a Beatle!

"Be reasonable, this will never work, besides you tried and failed with George, do you really want to do this again, all things aside?" I thought. If Sienna wasn't in the picture...

"No, no way, stop it right now." I told myself.

"Um..." I could _**not** _find any words.

"Actually, can I tell you something first?" He spoke up.

"Sure...my brain doesn't appear to be working." I agreed, with a nervous laugh.

"Well, it might be a little embarrassing...for me but I've sort of..."

"Had a crush on me? Yeah I know." I blurted. Okay so _now_ my voice was working. He looked at me funny.

"You knew?" He asked. Oh shoot... I didn't want to get Ringo in trouble so I came up with something else.

"Uh, yeah. You aren't exactly subtle." I laughed nervously, swirling my drink.

"Oh... well I never did anything about it because I figured you were smitten with John." He explained.

"Mm, okay. Well I am, but not in that way." This was it. He was confessing his love for me.

"Now maybe I can speak in coherent sentences." I thought.

"And then I was reminded that you're not even from here. One day you'll go back to your time and I'll never see you again." He continued. I opened my mouth to try and counter that, but that would just make it weird.

"But you know what, I don't care if you're from 2015 and in your timeline I'm old enough to be your granddad... this is here and now. And I really like you, Ashley. I don't know why you ended up here or even how you ended up here and for all I know you could be a figment of all of our imaginations but none of that matters to me. All I know is you're a wonderful person and...I think I'm falling in love with you." He finally said it and do you think I could speak by that point? Uh-uh! Half of me was being logical saying _'just tell him it can't work!_ ' But the other half of me was going ballistic because Paul McCartney had just said he loved me.

"I-I'm in love you too..." The words were out of my mouth before I could even begin to cover that one up! Paul looked surprised, to put it lightly.

"Oh my good God, I cannot believe you just said that." I thought. But was it entirely wrong? I mean it was every girl's dream to have Paul freakin' McCartney tell them that he was falling in love with them and I was that lucky girl. The Sienna dilemma aside, he was really such a sweetie and though he went through girls pretty quickly, I don't think I ever heard of one story where he disrespected her. Would it be so bad if I let myself be courted and doted on by him?

"Who knows even if I would screw up Sienna's future?" I thought.

"No! be reasonable!" The logical half countered.

"You...you are?" He asked. I finished off my coffee to avoid talking.

"This is incredibly stupid!!" I thought.

"But it doesn't have to be. Maybe what I need is something stupid..."

"Uh... yeah." I decided, setting my cup down. I may have just made the worst mistake of my life, but maybe it would be worth it? I mean he knew I'd have to go back to where I came from at some point so this wasn't going to be serious and going in, I guess that was reassuring. I think Paul was actually speechless. He clearly wasn't expecting me to return the affection and I wasn't even sure how I truly felt yet, but this was happening by the looks of things.

"Do you wanna get out of here?" Paul then asked.

"Sure. Do you wanna just go back to the hotel?" I replied, getting up. I felt weird, like this weird sort of happy feeling I hadn't felt since George and I went out briefly. I didn't even think about how he felt about all of this. This was insane, but by that point, I didn't care how crazy it was. The irrational half of me was winning. So if Paul loved me, then I'd let him. If I somehow ended up stuck here indefinitely, then I'd end things but we both knew this would never be a permanent thing and that was okay. As we left the coffee shop, I was on cloud nine. This was not the outcome I had expected, I had planned to tell Paul who I really was, who he was in my future and how we could never work, but I ended up giving into his puppy dog stare and his little speech. Was I crazy? Probably. Did I care? Nope. We walked down the main drag, both just silent. I think we were both just replaying in our heads what happened exactly.

"So um...what was it you wanted to tell me about Sienna? I sort of cut you off." Paul suddenly spoke and I remembered.

"Oh that... nothing. Just meaningless conversation." I bluffed. So I was sticking with being mindless and stupid then...alright.

"I'll tell him one day, just not today." I thought with a small smile.

"So what do you want to do?" I asked, feeling super relaxed all of a sudden.

"I-I'm not quite sure. I'm sort of at a loss." He laughed.

"Is this weird? I feel like this is a little weird." I decided to break the ice that had just formed between us.

"It is, a little." He admitted with a shy laugh.

"I mean you're my friend, this is just a whole new world of stuff and I really didn't expect this today..." Wasn't that the truth. He was about to respond when from behind us we heard girls shriek.

"It's Paul!!" They chorused. He and I looked at one another and said the same thing.

"Run!" He grabbed my hand and we took off down the street. I burst out laughing.

"This keeps happening to you." I called.

"Are you going to be okay?" He called back as we kept running. We could hear the girls behind us screaming and trying to catch a Beatle.

"I'm fine, keep going!" I laughed. We ran for what seemed like ever before the girls actually gave up.

"Woah, woah wait, stop, I think they're gone." I said breathlessly, beginning to slow down. Paul, still with a firm grip on my hand, led me around the corner into a narrow alleyway just to be safe.

"Whew, I thought they had you there for a minute." I laughed, trying to fix my fake hair that had gone all askew in the chase. Both of us were out of breath and a mess of giggles.

"Well that was fun to say the least." I remarked, smoothing the wig down so I didn't look like I'd just been in a windstorm.

"I'm just glad you didn't hurt yourself this time." He smiled.

"Yeah, me too. Honestly if it's not me getting hurt, it's you." I pointed out, referencing his little incident a few months back. He nodded.

"Yeah, that wasn't a fun time." He knew what I was talking about.

"Hey, those guys were just a couple of punks. You may not be that great at fighting, but that's a good thing. You're good at so many other things." I found myself assuring him.

"I know. Thanks." He replied with another smile. I ducked around the corner.

"I think we can go now, if you want. Personally, I have no idea where we are." I chuckled, popping my head back toward him. He was looking at me funny.

"This doesn't feel weird now." He said.

"What doesn't feel weird?" I asked, having a little bit of a blank brain moment. Our eyes met and in that moment, I couldn't hear or see anything else. I was maybe stupid, crazy, not thinking straight, or all of the above but all I can credit what happened next to was the spur of the moment.

_**Paul McCartney kissed me.** _

__


	30. TWENTY NINE

**TWENTY NINE:**

 

I was in stunned shock for a split second before my brain clued into what was actually happening. And then I literally did not care, I didn't care how wrong this probably was or that I wasn't even really thinking straight, all I knew was this was happening and I was letting it. After it happened, I was speechless.

"Well there's no going back now." I thought as my face felt flushed suddenly.

"I-I'm sorry... was that too sudden?" Paul was flustered as well. Didn't we make quite the pair?

"Um... no, no it was okay...it was ...nice." I stammered, nervously straightening my jacket. I was never like this when it was George. Oh my God... what was George going to think when he saw Paul and I parading around? He obviously knew that he had a crush on me from when the three of them were sort of ribbing me at the venue. But was he okay with the idea? I mean we did used to date...for however brief a time.

"Are you sure? You look a little lost... I tend to come on a little strong, I'm sorry." Poor Paul had been babbling on the whole time I was buried in my thoughts! I raised my hands to stop him from talking a mile a minute and let out a light laugh.

"Don't worry about it. We've made it clear how we feel, there's no harm in displaying it." I have no idea where the words came from, but they seemed to fit and do the trick to relax Paul.

"Oh okay, good... so do you want to go back to the hotel now?" He changed the subject. He was as awkward as I was with this whole thing.

"It's a mistake I'm telling you." A voice echoed in my head.

"Oh shut up and have fun." I thought in argument. I had to admit, it was nice to have somebody care about you like that. I know I enjoyed it with George, the special treatment and all. Part of me wished that had lasted... but in the end it wouldn't have worked anyway, just how me and Paul were never going to work long term.

"So what the hell am I even doing?" I thought as I agreed simply to return to the hotel and see what the story was over there with the other three.

"Why are you over thinking this? Just let it happen." I countered with myself. I couldn't make up my mind. For now, I was happy... I think.

 

********

 

Not much else happened after that, we were told our train was to leave within the hour and the band had an interview the minute they got off the train pretty much, so I was busy packing up my belongings for the trip. I stayed in my plain grey dress, as no one would be paying much attention to me anyway and I was ready long before the others were.

"Should I just stay here or go see if they need help?" I wondered to myself as I sat down on the chair near the door with my bag. I really didn't want to be around them at the moment because my mind was still processing what had happened with Paul.

"Does this mean we're a couple now? ...What is George going to think? ... Will Paul keep it private? Am I okay with this?" All those things were spinning through my head so bad I was getting a headache. Sighing, I took out my journal and pen and just started writing, maybe hoping I could get my thoughts out clearly.

 

_February 12, 1964_

_The show last night was amazing as usual, it was a full house just like it always was, and I had a really good time. But something happened after that and I'm not overly sure how I feel about it. I dated George briefly when I first arrived here but that ended up not working out. Now, Paul declared his love for me just this morning. I planned on telling him straight out about everything, like Sienna, me, who I really am... everything. But instead, I told him I loved him in return. I don't want to upset him and just go to him now and say it isn't going to work out. I mean, he kissed me for God's sake! I really like Paul, I always have and this is something completely crazy and different...it's even different from when George and I were a couple. This is Paul we're talking about. Sienna's grandfather, my hero, the man who I had just barely met before I was transported back to fifty years ago. I mean, of course this can't ever work long term and I hope he knows that. He must know I'm supposed to go back home at some point...I hope. I don't want to upset him and I really do love him but I'm not sure in the same way he does me..._

I was interrupted by a brisk knock on the door. Snapping back to reality, I closed the notebook and shoved it back into my bag before I went and opened the door.

"Hey George." I smiled, feeling slightly relieved it wasn't Paul.

"Hey Ashley, ready to go? We figured you'd come over once you were ready." George wondered. I cleared my throat, feeling nervous suddenly.

"Um, yeah sorry. I meant to but I got caught up with packing and stuff. But yeah, I'm ready." I think George noticed I was off.

"Are you alright? You seem pretty jumpy." He finally spoke about it as we left the hotel room with my luggage. 

"Me? I'm fine, just excited I guess. Going back to New York and all." I bluffed. What was wrong with me?

"Yeah and we're there for Valentine's Day too which should be fun." George commented. My heart skipped a beat.

"Great." I thought.

"Yeah, you got a date?" I lightly teased 

"Me? Nah, I just like getting the chocolate all half priced." He teased back. I let out a little laugh as we reached the lobby. Valentine's day in New York City... with Paul having confessed his undying love for me...

"Better expect a ton of stuffed bears, roses and candies." I thought sarcastically. But deep down, visualizing that actually made me smirk a little to myself.

"What'd you do, get lost?" John remarked as we joined them in the lobby.

"I lost track of time." I merely replied, not in a joking mood.

"We'd better get going." Paul looked at his watch again. So we did, and before I knew it, we were back in the car. The four guys were chatting as they usually did but I was quiet. Thinking over what I'd written down in my journal, mulling over things I'd been mulling over for most of the day.

"Why did I say I loved him?" I thought, mentally banging my head off a wall. But then the feeling came back. I felt this sort of bubbly electricity rise inside of me. I looked away from the window for a moment and our eyes met. I turned back to the window to hide my smile. My cheeks felt warm too. I was blushing! I recalled the kiss in the alleyway. Maybe it was a little sudden and out of the blue, but aside from it shocking me completely, it was actually really nice and fun.

"What does this mean?" I thought. For hours I'd been trying to tell myself how stupid of a move this was and that I could be destroying the future but suddenly none of that mattered to me anymore. He loved me. I was the strange girl who came seemingly out of nowhere and he loved me.

"And I love him." I decided. If it was happening, then let it happen. I wasn't going to fight it anymore. I'd made my decision. Whatever the consequences in the future, I didn't care anymore. Besides, it wasn't like I was a time travel expert or anything. And this history wasn't exactly all correct for the time I was in. I had no clue how I got here in the first place anyway so who really cared what I did. I had to stop overthinking everything. I missed home, sure and I missed my parents though I found I was still pretty angry with them but I'd come so far while being stuck here. John wasn't my mortal enemy, I'd dated George, Ringo was like one of my best friends, I adored every single one of them and now Paul was in love with me. I had a crazy thought then,

"What if I was meant to be back here? What if this is where I'm supposed to end up?" It was a silly notion, because I knew I had a life back in 2015. But still, it was nice to put some sense to why I was here either than my hypothetical guess of bonding with John before it was too late. I felt a lump in my throat at the sheer thought of that again as my eyes drifted to him casually smoking and talking with Paul.

"Ashley?" A voice brought me back down to earth. I looked and Ringo was staring at me.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"You didn't hear me?" He wondered.

"Oh...God, I'm sorry, no I was lost in thought over here." I said, feeling embarrassed.

"It's okay, I was just asking if you'd been in contact with your family at all since we've been in America?" He asked innocently.

"Um...no I haven't." I answered truthfully. I really didn't know how to answer and I'd kind of forgotten that Paul and I were still playing up that story.

"I give them a call from time to time, let them know she's doing alright." Paul suddenly spoke up. I shot him a grateful look.

"You never talk about them, you know." George pointed out. Now I was in the hot seat.

"Well I do sometimes." I countered, hoping they'd move on.

"Not really, what do they do?" John spoke up. I bit my lip.

"Well, my dad writes songs and my mum is a model." I shared, rather quickly.

"A model? Anybody we know of?" George got way too excited.

"I... don't think so." I stammered.

"Well what about your father then, who is he?" John asked. The lump in my throat was back.

"He's your kid." I thought. I couldn't say that of course! Though at that moment I didn't know why I couldn't. I mean, I'd just given up on trying to keep the timeline in tact, what harm would it have done for me to just spill my guts right then and there?

"They'll think you're a lunatic for one." I thought. Paul might believe me but even still... besides, I think it was a universal law, mostly in fictional movies, but a rule I didn't want to break... that of them not knowing too much about their own futures. Though every single day I wanted to warn John about his inevitable fate. I knew I couldn't but still...

"Oh he's nobody you'd recognize. My parents aren't as famous as they sound. We live a simple life." I chose my words carefully.

"So why are you here then, with Paul?" George inquired.

"My...parents are going through a split." I fibbed.

"Oh...I'm sorry." George was suddenly sorry he asked.

"Yeah, they sent me away so I wouldn't be in the middle of it all and Paul offered to take me for a while." I made up a story.

"Well aren't you a saint?" John teased Paul who merely smiled with pleasure. Thankfully, they moved on after that. I let out a deep breath and took back to the window, but I couldn't stop smiling all of a sudden. What I didn't know was just how much different things were going to get, and soon.

 

*********

 

Before long, we were on the train again and I was getting settled. I wanted to write in my journal some more but I didn't get to. Shortly into the voyage back to New York, John, George and Ringo all decided to explore the train, and maybe find a dining car. Paul and I were invited along of course, but I didn't feel like it and Paul apparently didn't either. I knew better though, I knew he wanted to talk in private and I didn't blame him. I'd been kind of aloof and distant since that morning with him. Still though, I tried to act casual and 'admire the scenery' out the train window.

"Ashley?" Paul finally spoke and touched my shoulder, making me jump a little.

"Relax." I told myself.

"Yeah?" I replied, facing him finally.

"Are we okay?" He asked, genuinely concerned. I instantly felt bad.

"What? Oh gosh, yes we're okay." I assured him.

"Oh, I was just wondering because earlier you seemed..." He trailed off.

"I know, I'm sorry. I've just been thinking." I was honest with him. He looked slightly alarmed at that.

"Thinking? That's never good." He joked. I laughed, relaxing more.

"Don't worry though, we're fine." I told him, truthfully. Well he was mighty relieved to hear that. Silence fell between us for a moment.

"Thank you, for what you did back there in the car." I broke the quietness. He shot me a smile.

"You're welcome, they sort of all just latched onto you." He chuckled.

"Yeah, I hadn't even really remembered our little fake story." I replied.

"I've got your back, don't worry." He assured me and I felt really special. The train ride was uneventful either than the lads' usual witty banter. I felt more in the mood to join in by then so we had a fun time just being us. By the time we got back into New York, the screams were echoing down the street and the queue of fans lined up near the train was unfathomable.

"Woah." I said in awe as I looked. The other three came and looked over my shoulder.

"You should be used to this by now, Miss Ashley, we're famous you know." John teased me and I just made a face.

"I know that but it's still crazy, I mean they just scream so much." I laughed, getting up from my seat and swinging my bag over my shoulder. I made sure my coat was buttoned all the way up and followed the boys to the door. Mr. Epstein was there waiting and I sort of did a double take, not remembering him ever getting on the train to begin with. He gave the lads the usual rundown, head straight for the waiting car, no fraternizing with the fans, to which John made a whining sound... typical. The rush of touring with them was back once the train door slid open and the screams nearly deafened me.

"Let's go!" I heard John holler over the noise. We took off, me with my head down and shoulders in until we made it to the black car waiting for us. I nearly tumbled in and let out a laugh once we were safe inside the car.

"Man that's a rush!" I exclaimed and the others laughed.

"See, you like it." John remarked.

"I guess I do. It's just incredible to see you guys living the dream." I got all sentimental there for a second. I was kind of sleepy after the long day so far, but there was no way a nice hotel room with a poufy bed was anywhere in the near future. I'd been told before we left that the lads had an interview first thing, so that's where we were heading. There were even fans lined up at the building the interview was being held at.

"Ready?" I asked them. My eyes must have just been dancing with excitement. The other four nodded eagerly, so I threw open the door and made a beeline for the building, the others hot on my heels. As we made it through the glass doors, I saw three police officers standing by, making sure the band got in safely. The problem though, was they thought I was a stray fan who had gotten in.

"Hey you! What do you think you're doing?" One demanded and I froze for a split second.

"Hey, she's with us. She's Molly Jones, our assistant." Paul spoke up from behind me. The officer looked at a slip of paper.

"She isn't on the list." He replied.

"Well she's coming with us regardless." John replied boldly.

"I'm sorry, she doesn't have authorization. You four go ahead, they're waiting for you, but Miss Jones will have to wait out here." The officer decided.

"But..." George started. I turned to the four of them. I was bummed I couldn't watch them be interviewed, but I had to do what the officer wanted. If I wasn't on the list, I wasn't on the list. I assumed it was just some mix up.

"Don't worry about it, guys. I'll be right here waiting for you when you're done." I assured them. They all did not look happy that I had to stay behind, but they complied and said bye to me before leaving. I was a little agitated at the officer, this was the first time I'd ever been excluded from something with the four of them. I was their assistant after all, I mean as far as everybody else was concerned. The officer led me over to a hard bench on the other side of the lobby.

"Excuse me, sir? May I see that paper you have there?" I suddenly asked.

"I don't think so." Was the answer.

"Listen, I am the Beatles' executive assistant. I understand you have your orders but that doesn't mean I should be kept in the dark as to why I was not included in this interview." I spoke bolder than I had in a long time. I didn't even know where that had come from! The officer hesitated for a moment, but then handed me the folded up slip of paper.

"It's from their manager, miss. If there's any problem, I suggest you take it up with him." The officer was now giving me a bit of attitude, but I ignored it as I scanned the letter.

"This is to inform you and your staff...Beatles...interview...11th of February..." I mumbled as I read it. It listed all four of their names but made no mention of my name to be admitted into the building.

"Thank you." I handed the paper back to the officer and he walked away.

"Oh relax, they used to go on a lot of interviews, before we left England and I was left at the flat." I tried to put a logical spin on it.

"But I'm their assistant now. Mr. Epstein made me their assistant." I countered.

"It could be a private interview." I mused.

"But come on, nothing about those guys is private anymore." I was stumped. I was also very bored. Minutes ticked by, but they felt like hours. I tried to occupy myself with small games like seeing how many of the same hairstyle on women I could find, small math games with the numbers on the clock on the wall... nothing satisfied my boredom. I tried to think of Paul and how I'd decided to give our new relationship a go but my thoughts were preoccupied with why I wasn't admitted past the lobby. In the short time I'd been with the lads, I'd become sort of like a lucky charm to them, especially since leaving England. They needed me. I was positively bored out of my skull by the time the interview was finally over, it had been an hour and a bit of me just sitting there twiddling my thumbs. There weren't even any magazines I could have read. I smiled though as they came towards me, only they didn't look happy in the least.

"Let's go." John told me, in a tone of voice I was all too familiar with. He wasn't mad at me though. I stood up without a word and left. The crowd of fans was still there, but I didn't even notice. I was hung up on why they were all irritated. Surely they all wouldn't be sour just because I wasn't allowed in with them. Once we were in the car, I asked

"So how was the interview?"

"Fine, the usual." John replied, in the same tone.

"Are...you guys okay? I'm fine, I didn't mind waiting for you guys." That was a total lie.

"Yeah, do you want to know why you were stuck waiting for us?" Paul asked, even he sounded angry which was very unlike him.

"Um, yeah sure." I didn't want to sound too enthusiastic when four out of five of us were clearly pissed.

"We ran into Brian when we got inside. So we asked him, why wasn't Ashley allowed back here with us? He thinks you're becoming too much of a distraction." John explained.

"What? How?" I was surprised indeed. I thought he liked me, that I was a helping hand and all that. I mean it was partly his idea that I become this alter ego known as Molly Jones anyway.

"He thinks that since you came along, we've been in more hot water than ever before." Paul went on.

"Wow... I-I don't know what to say." I was at a loss for words. Sure I guess maybe it was true, since I'd been here Paul had gotten mangled by a couple of college boys who in turn beat John up as well, I'd dated George, I hurt my ankle running from fans, John ended up in the newspaper after sleeping with a reporter, I ended up drunk... Not all of those were my fault, they were just boys being boys.

"But if I hadn't been here would any of this happened?" I thought, suddenly feeling pretty down on myself.

"Well we told him that you're Paul's charge and he has to look after you whether he likes it or not." George spoke.

"Yeah but he knows that already." I replied.

"Point is, Ashley, we're not giving into this. You're our Ashley. We need you." Ringo gave me a small smile. That made me feel a little better, but still... not a great afternoon. I quieted up after that, not feeling like talking. I think the lads knew I was upset and I wasn't going to hide it. Once we got to the hotel, Mr. Epstein was there again waiting. Sometimes I think he teleported from one place to another. George got me my room key and offered to walk me there, to which I agreed. Out of all of them, he seemed the less ticked. He was always the gentle one. I didn't stick around long after that, I grabbed my suitcase that had been brought in from the car and marched away with George. Neither of us said a word the entire elevator ride up and I don't think there was anything to be said. It was clear how their manager viewed me now. The thing was, I didn't know what to do about it. When we reached my room, I jammed the key into the lock and gave it a good sharp turn before marching into the room and tossing my bags haphazardly on or around the couch.

"You're angry." George finally spoke.

"Yeah? What gave me away?" I snapped, taking the brown haired wig off and shoving my natural hair out of my face. I saw the look on his face, one of uncertainty and felt bad for snapping.

"I'm sorry... I just don't know what to do." I confessed, sitting down on the couch.

"Well, if it's any consolation, I think since you've been with us, we've had some of the best times." George was such a sweetie. I gave him a small smile.

"Thanks." I sighed.

"Don't be so upset though, we're gonna fix it. You shoulda seen John when Brian told us. I think he wanted the most to slug him." George laughed a little. That only made me feel worse. John had to really learn he couldn't settle every disagreement with his fists.

"Well... it seems like a lot of trouble to go through for just one person." I shrugged, still feeling low.

"Hey, that's nonsense that is. Ashley, you're really special to all of us, don't you know that?" George came and sat next to me.

"I suppose so." I picked at a loose thread on my dress.

"Whether you believe it or not, I think all of our lives have been better with you in it. You're our ray of sunshine, Ashley Bunting. It's you that keeps us sane." He smiled. I felt tears spark my eyes at the kind words.

"Thank you, George."  He then leaned forward and kissed my forehead just purely platonic but it was nice all the same.

"I should go get unpacked. Will you be okay?" He asked, getting up.

"Me? Yeah, I'll be fine. Thanks for walking me up." I answered, putting a smile on. He said he'd see me in a bit then and left. Once I was alone again, all I wanted to do was curl into a ball on the bed and stay there. I have to say it was one roller coaster of a day that day and I was pretty much done with it.

 

 

 


	31. THIRTY

**THIRTY:**

That evening was pretty much uneventful, I ended up just going to hang out with the boys in their suite and they had ordered room service. The tension was thick though, with the tiredness no doubt everyone was experiencing along with the upsetting thing that had occurred earlier. No one talked about it, but it was the elephant in the room. If their manager didn't approve of me all of a sudden, did that mean I had to leave? Where the hell was I supposed to go? I mean, it was even lucky I had found Paul when I got there. Would I have to own up to who and what I really was? I know I was mulling over all those things which drastically affected my appetite. Around 10, I decided to take my leave and Paul insisted on walking me to my room which was only a few doors away. After a half-hearted goodnight to the others, we left. It was silent between us for most of the way.

"Are you tired?" He finally asked me.

"Sort of. Just had to get out of there, everyone is like so close to snapping tonight." I confessed.

"Yeah well... you know why." He replied.

"I know. And I really appreciate you guys sticking up for me but if I'm going to put a rift between you guys and your manager..." I trailed off. What exactly was I going to suggest? He stopped me and laid his hands on my shoulders.

"Nobody is making you leave if that's what you're getting at. We're all gonna take care of this first thing tomorrow. You're super special to all of us, Ashley. We're not just gonna give in." He stared straight into my eyes and I got a chill. He was the second one to say something like that.

"Well, I have to say I'm feeling pretty special since this happened. I didn't know how much you guys were desperate for me to stay with you." I made a half hearted joke.

"You are special, Ashley. Don't let anyone tell you different." Was his reply to that. My heart just went to mush. Why was he such a sweetie?

"Thanks." I felt a little sheepish.

"I'll let you turn in then, and don't worry about anything, okay?" He said after a moment. I nodded.

"Okay. Goodnight." I said to him, feeling slightly better. He kissed me before he left and I felt slightly giddy. The episode at the interview had overshadowed the fact that I was falling in love with him.

"Goodnight." He said in parting and I went inside, closing and locking the door behind me. But as much as I wanted to go to bed, I found myself taking a long shower and changing not into my pajamas but a plain black dress. I needed to go for a walk, just to sort through some things and maybe make peace with this whole manager thing. I grabbed my coat as I left, not really caring if I had my wig on or not, it was dark out anyway. I didn't take the elevator down, I jut slowly took the stairs, hearing the heels of my shoes click on every one. I really intended on going out the front doors and getting lost somewhere but once I reached the lobby, someone caught my eye off to the side in the hotel bar. I didn't even think it through, I just spun on my heel and walked into the bar. The person I wanted to speak to was sitting at a table near the door with a drink and a newspaper. I plunked myself down across from him and he lowered the paper.

"Miss Bunting? Can I help you?" Mr. Epstein asked.

"Yeah, you can cut the crap and level with me." I sounded firmer than I had intended. My tone surprised him, but I wasn't gonna back down now.

"I-I don't understand..." He fumbled with the paper.

"I'm sorry if I've upset you in some way or done something to make you think I'm not good enough for your precious Beatles, but they would all say otherwise." I said sternly.

"Miss Bunting, this isn't personal, it's strictly business. I'm sure fans and the press don't want to see some strange girl following the boys like an adoring puppy everywhere they go." He tried to explain. I sat back.

"Isn't that why you made me an assistant?" I retorted. He paused.

"Yeah, tell me it isn't personal again. I dare you." I was angry and I hardly ever got angry.

"Miss Bunting, since you've been...with them, I've had to put out more fires dealing with them than ever before." He went a different angle.

"So? They're kids! They're young men supercharged with ego and hormones, of course they're gonna get into trouble. You should be grateful for all I've done with them since I've been here. Did you know it was me that got to Paul as soon as I could when he got hurt? Did you know it was me who stitched John up after he went after the perpetrators? Did you know that it was me who tried to fix the newspaper scandal with John? Did you know it was me who made sure if they were drunk they went straight to bed? I've been such a helping hand with those four than I think you realize and they love me. They can't imagine life without me with them. I've tried to be nothing but a good assistant too. I've worn the getup in public, I've done paperwork for God's sake, I've doted on and cared for those four boys above and beyond probably anybody since they've been on tour. So you can't tell me I'm a disruptive influence." I rhymed off. He was speechless. I was just going to stand to go when he finally spoke.

"I suppose I may have misjudged you, Miss Bunting. I know the lads love you and you do bring a certain charm to their dynamic as a group. I apologize." He said. I felt sort of winded after my little spout off there, but it proved to work.

"Thank you. Have a good night." I replied, fixing my collar before I left the man in peace. A small smile spread its way across my face as it clued in as to what I'd just done. I'd stood up for myself like an adult would have in this situation.

"That's right, I'm not some seventeen-year-old schoolgirl from modern day London anymore." I thought proudly as I passed a mirror.

"I'm a young woman in the 1960's." I was tired after that, and I was satisfied with what I had accomplished. I was heading back up the stairs to my floor when a familiar figure caught my eye at the top of the floor.

"John? What are you doing out here?" I asked, as I reached him. He saw me and looked like he was about to say the same thing.

"I'm not doing anything else until this problem with Brian is fixed." He said pointedly. I was scared for a moment as to what he intended to do, but I quickly regained my composure.

"No need, I handled it." I told him. He looked at me surprised.

"You handled it? What did you do?" He wondered.

"I talked to him." I shrugged.

"Well if it was only that easy earlier..." He made a little joke and he seemed to relax.

"What did you say?" Was his next question. The two of us started walking toward the next staircase.

"Just that I didn't think I was a problem, he needed to see I was an ally and not an enemy... and that you guys love me." I tacked on the last bit sort of as a joke.

" _Jesus_ , you didn't really tell him we love you did you?" I couldn't discern if he was joking or not.

"Well some variation of that, yeah. I figured it was a winner to say to him otherwise. Why else would I be with you all for so long?" I dangled the bait, seeing if he was indeed kidding around. He cracked a smile finally.

"Well, don't ever say this in public, Miss Ashley, but I do love you. We all love you. When you first showed up, I thought you were just a snobby friend of Paul's who was gonna stick her nose into our lives and get in the way." He said. I didn't take offense to any of that, I knew.

"But you proved you were far from that right off the bat. You've got spunk, Ashley Bunting and you've become not just Paul's friend but George's, Ringo's and even one of my closest friends. I don't think I've ever met anyone, let alone a girl, that got me as much as you do. There's no way we could ever give you up. Especially me." I tried not to tear up at his speech. I loved the moments where his true self shone through.

"Thank you. That means a lot." I told him truthfully as we reached our floor. He smirked at me.

"You're welcome. Now don't go blabbing it to everybody. Got it?" He half teased. I smiled and playfully punched him lightly in the arm.

"Got it. Goodnight." I said.

"Goodnight, Miss Ashley." He replied, before we parted. His words echoed through my mind as I walked back to my room and tossed my coat on the couch.

_"You've got spunk, Ashley Bunting...I don't think I've ever met anyone, let alone a girl, that got me as much as you do...There's no way we could ever give you up. Especially me."_ I guess I was one of the few people who really understood him. Whether that was from general knowledge in the future or some kind of bloodline link, I didn't know. But I saw so many similarities between him and dad, between him and me... My heart ached thinking again about what was to come all too soon.

"Don't dwell on that. You had a good talk, that's a point for team friendship once again." I smiled to myself as I made my way back to the bedroom. So the evening had worked out okay after all. Paul had walked me 'home' in essence and kissed me goodnight which was sweet, I'd solved my own problems with Mr. Epstein and I hoped John would relay that news to the other three, and John and I had another heart to heart. I was definitely ready for bed by then, just full of good vibes and emotions. I changed into a blue night dress, braided my dark hair into a French braid and climbed under the covers. Sleep came almost instantly.

********

_I heard a crash in the middle of the night that woke me up instantly._

_"What the hell was that?" I thought, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. I quickly realized I wasn't in the hotel room... where was I? I was in a king sized bed with overly floral bed sheets. Still sort of in a fog, I switched on the lamp and dim light filled the room. I was in a bedroom, but I wasn't even back home... no this was an entirely different bedroom. The walls were painted an ugly yellow and the furniture wasn't modern at all._

_"Where am I?" I thought, throwing back the covers and standing up. I was still in the blue nightdress but I quickly realized that I wasn't seventeen anymore. I was facing a mirror near the bed and I almost screamed! It was still me, I had my dad's eyes still and his nose, but I wasn't a teenager, I was somewhere in my mid twenties!_

_"How did this happen? Did I jump through time?" I thought, panicking. I pulled my hands through my much longer hair and something caught my scalp. Pulling my hand away, I saw a wedding ring on my left finger. My heart froze. What had happened?! I didn't remember anything. Hearing another crash, I grabbed a shawl from the nearby chair and wrapped it around my shoulders as I ran out of the room and down the hall. I was in a proper house!_

_"Who am I married to? Where did the years go?" I thought. And more importantly, what year was this? I saw the front door and threw it open. It was the middle of the night but all I saw was grass and the sky. Still panicking, I stepped outside and cool air bit at my cheeks. I looked around to see a car in the driveway that was old, but it didn't look 60's old, it looked later than that. I didn't know how I knew that. On the porch was a porch swing and a small garden below. I was shaking by then, either from shock or cold, I didn't know. I went back inside and closed the door, unsure of what to do next when I heard a sound again from another room. I followed my ears, my heart nearly beating through my rib cage until I got to a living room. Books from the shelf on the wall had been knocked onto the floor and a vase of flowers sat precariously on the edge of a side table. I moved the vase to safety, and that's when I saw him. It was Paul, approximately ten years older passed out on the ugly pink couch with a bottle of what looked like scotch in his hand, threatening to fall. I gasped, my hand flying to my mouth as I started piecing things together. I was his wife, we had a house in the middle of seemingly nowhere and he was drunk off his ass. I still couldn't remember any of the life I was supposed to have here, but I quietly tried to take the bottle from him. He obviously wasn't completely passed out because he murmured my name._

_"It's me, just go to sleep." I spoke finally._

_"What happened?" He replied, his speech clearly affected from the alcohol. He sat up and I blinked back tears. What had happened to him? He had a beard, his hair was all messed up, his clothes were disheveled and his eyes looks so tired and sad. But I knew he meant what had happened to him within the last few hours._

_"You must've gone out drinking." I sighed gently, sitting next to him._

_"Oh." Was his answer as he laid his head back. I looked at the wedding band on my hand and wondered how long we'd been married. I didn't even remember my wedding day._

_"You should get some sleep. You're gonna feel pretty awful come the morning." I advised._

_"What did I ever do to deserve you? Most women would be yelling at me to get my goddamn life together." He muttered, turning to face me. I smiled gently and touched the side of his face._

_"I'm not most women." I answered, still pretty perplexed. He just smiled back and turned away again. I watched him and his hazel eyes started welling with tears._

_"Paul?" I asked. He punched the cushion next to him, clearly angry now. I jumped a little, trying frantically to remember if he was violent when drunk at all._

_"I can't believe it." He cried angrily._

_"Can't believe what? What's the matter?" I reached out to him._

_"It's over, Ashley. It's just over...and he's so horrible to me..." I took his hand and gave it a squeeze, trying to figure out what in the hell he was talking about. My eyes skimmed over a newspaper laying on the coffee table and noted the date. It was April 1970. The band had **just** broken up. I knew that though Paul chose to leave in the end, it really broke him and he and John weren't on the best of terms during those days. I caught my breath just thinking about him briefly. Where was he? Did he know I married Paul? Did he approve?_

_"Hey listen, it's a rough time for all of us right now. But it will get better. I promise. And as for John, don't you worry about him. I'll deal with him if I have to." I finally opened my mouth. He faced me again, tears still in his eyes._

_"You don't think I'm a failure, do you?" He asked me. My eyes softened at his sadness._

_"Of course I don't. You're a wonderful man. You're a wonderful musician, songwriter and person. Don't you dare let anyone else tell you different." I told him. I knew he probably wouldn't remember any of this come the morning, but it was worth a shot. He accepted that and let me put him to bed after that. I let him have the bed, feeling really weird about sharing one even though it seemed we were married. I went back to the living room and picked up the books before I laid down on the couch. I was going to close my eyes and go back to sleep when suddenly it all came to me. How I'd been stuck in the past since 1963, I toured with the lads, I dated Paul come winter of 1964 and we dated right up until 1968 when he asked me to marry him. We'd been married for three years, I'd watched the band go through Beatlemania, to the decline of the band, the drugs, the fighting, everything. I remembered I hadn't spoken to John since '69. They had all been in attendance at the wedding though, a small garden affair. And I was still here. Living life married to Paul in the wake of the breakup of the best band in history. I loved him, I really did but I did wonder about my old life sometimes and if I'd just faded out of existence. Somehow, even though I remembered all that and should have been losing my mind, I still went to sleep._

_**_

_I felt my heart pounding in my ears and heard short gasping breaths. I was running, but from what? I opened my eyes and my legs were running down a street in the middle of Manhattan._

_"Not again!" I panicked. I was still not seventeen, it was the night John died and I had aged. I was now in my thirties. Where Paul was, I didn't know. I tried to stop running, but I couldn't. I looked around frantically for him through a sea of faceless faces until I caught sight of him._

_"John! Run!" I cried. He looked at me perplexed._

_"Ashley?" He asked in disbelief. I approached him and he was alone, his wife wasn't with him._

_"That's not right..." I thought._

_"No, no don't stand there, run!" I pleaded, noticing we were in front of the Dakota. He reached out to me._

_"It must be... ten years since I last saw you." He was getting sentimental!_

_"Okay, that's great, I'm sorry I haven't been in touch but we really have got to go." I urged him._

_"Why? What's the rush? I've missed you. Why don't you come inside? Meet the wife and my boy." He smiled._

_"John, listen to me...there's a man around here with a gun and he wants to kill you." I said, in all seriousness._

_"Ashley, have you lost it? No one's going to hurt me." He chuckled. Just then, I hard Paul's voice._

_"There you are. You just took off; I didn't know where you went." He came up to me._

_"Sorry..." I was still looking around, panicking._

_"John... good to see you." Paul realized who was with me._

_"You as well. Treating Ashley good, are you?" He asked. Paul smiled at me._

_"Oh I think so."_

_"Listen guys, this is a nice reunion and all but please we have to go!" I cried._

_"She's convinced someone's out here to kill me." John laughed. Just then, the popping sound of gunfire echoed down the street. It all happened so fast. The gunman ducked out from around the corner and started firing his sidearm like a madman. I screamed bloody murder as I realized it was me in the path of fire. John dove in front of me to save my life and I landed face down on the pavement. I scrambled to my feet, feeling blood drip from my forehead and started screaming. John lay dead in front of me having saved my life but Paul lay next to him, his dark eyes wide open but seeing nothing._

_"No...No!" I screamed._

I sat right up, my heart racing a mile a minute.

"Well, that's new." I thought. Adrenaline was coursing through every fiber of my body over what my mind had just cooked up. I was shaking like a leaf as I threw back the covers and staggered to the bathroom. I turned on the light and faced the mirror.

"Why?" I asked myself. The dream had even started out weird. Slightly panicking, I checked my hands just to make sure there was indeed no wedding ring. There wasn't, I was still seventeen, I was still in New York in 1964.

"Geez, if this one doesn't take the cake..." I said to myself. I was scared. The dreams of me watching John die had been scary enough but coupled with me growing older as time went on with me stuck in the past was scarier. As was being married to Paul and the fact that this time both him and John had been shot dead... because of me.

"Oh stop overthinking this. It was a bloody nightmare." I thought, trying to get my mind off it. Suddenly, I just wanted someone to hold me close and tell me it was just a dream and everything would be okay. Usually that was my dad. But he wasn't here.

"And I'm not bugging one of the lads over a bad dream." I thought, trying to get myself to laugh. I got myself a drink of water before my nerves calmed down enough to go back to bed.

"Relax. It's not the seventies, you're not married to Paul, he and John haven't died saving your life. You're okay." I told myself. But the cold reality was, John was still going to die. It was written in time and yet again in my dreams I failed to save him.

"Is this some kind of foreshadowing? Because I don't like it." I said aloud. Somehow, I managed to fall back asleep.

 


	32. THIRTY ONE

**THIRTY ONE:**

**A/N: Hope you are enjoying this! Things are about to get _hella_ complicated. Hold on to your hats.**

The dream seemed to be the furthest thing from my mind when I woke up the next morning. It was almost like it had never happened. I was in a great mood that morning which the reason for was beyond me, but I wasn't going to argue with it. I had a shower and while I was in there, it dawned on me that the lads were supposed to have had a concert last night. But instead they'd had an interview and the mishap with Mr. Epstein had happened. My good mood halted as I wondered for a moment if I had caused that change. I quickly got out of the shower then and dressed in an evergreen colored dress. It was still on my mind as I left the bedroom and headed for the doorway of my room. I grabbed my jacket absentmindedly and swung the door open to reveal Paul standing there about to knock with two coffees precariously balanced on top of one another in his other hand. The dream I'd had then came flooding back to my mind and I just wanted to throw my arms around him.

"Need help?" I offered, taking one of the coffees off his hands.

"Yeah thanks, that wasn't easy." He chuckled.

"And it could have ended in disaster." I noted, smiling as I invited him inside.

"How are you this morning?" He casually asked as I closed the door.

"Fine, can't complain. I suppose John told you about last night?" I replied, sitting across from him in an armchair. He nodded as he took a sip of coffee.

"Yeah he told us. I have to say I'm glad it's resolved." He admitted.

"Me too. And there was no real problem after all." I shrugged.

"I guess not. Now why don't you tell me what's wrong?" He asked. I froze.

"Wrong? Nothing's wrong." I fibbed, drinking my coffee.

"Ashley, I know when something's not right with you. You fidget uncontrollably." He noted. Did I really do that?

"Oh...do I?" I tried to stop.

"You and John both do it, that's how I know." He added.

"Go figure." I thought. I sighed.

"It's nothing really, just I had a rough night." I looked down, as images of him in seven years flickered through my head.

"Are you coming down with something?" He looked concerned.

"Oh no, it's nothing like that. Just sometimes I have nightmares is all." I confessed.

"Nightmares? John once mentioned you had bad dreams sometimes. I didn't know it was a regular thing." He frowned.

"Well, it's not usually. Normally I'm fine. But don't worry, I was probably just overtired." I shrugged.

"Maybe. Do you want to talk about it?" He inquired. I bit my lip.

"Um... I'm not sure." I said softly.

"Well it can't be any good to have it still rattling around your brain." He urged. I took a breath and chose my words properly.

"I dreamed that you died... y-you and John. There was a guy with a gun and he was aiming at me and...y-you both sort of saved my life." I stuttered, choosing to leave out the first half of the dream. It was too weird. Paul's expression softened and he came over to me.

"Why didn't you come find somebody to talk to when you woke up?" He asked, crouching in front of me.

"Because...I'm not seven." I remarked, with a small laugh, though tears were burning behind my eyes.

"Still... I would've woken up for you." He smiled.

"Look, I'm basically a grown up, I had a bad dream, it's over now. I'm okay, really." I assured him.

"Alright, if you think so. But listen, nothing is ever going to happen like that. I'm not gonna die, neither is John. We'll always be around." He winked. My heart ached again because sweet Paul had no idea. I smiled though, fake as it was.

"Yeah, I know. Hey, before I forget, weren't you supposed to have a concert last night?" I hoped to change the subject. He got up.

"I don't think so. We have one tonight, but that's hours away. I actually came to grab you. We're going exploring." He was all bubbly and carefree again. I didn't put much thought into the wrong tour date and decided to just go with it and add it to the list of things that didn't seem historically accurate. I was just glad we dropped the dream talk. The less I thought about all that, the better.

"What, you didn't come just to see me?" I pretended to pout. He offered his hand and I took it and stood up.

"Of course I did, this was just an added thing." He replied. I grabbed my coat and laughed.

"Nice save." I teased. He smiled and planted a kiss on my lips which kind of surprised me right off, but once my brain woke up, I liked it.

"Why thank you." He replied as I did up my jacket and fitted my hair back into my wig.

"Hey, I suppose you're my boyfriend now, eh?" I realized.

"If you wanna put technicalities to it, sure." He chuckled, opening the door.

"Well we are dating, are we not?" I asked.

"Hmm... not sure. I guess we haven't even gone on a proper date yet have we?" He realized. I let out a laugh as we headed for the elevator.

"Now you realize that?" I teased lightly.

"Well this only just happened within the last couple days." He thought I was genuinely upset about it.

"Relax, I'm kidding." I assured him.

"Oh... well still, I'll arrange something." He laughed.

"You don't have to..." I tried to say, but who was I kidding? A date with Paul probably was on every woman's bucket list. We fell quiet again, just both soaking in the awkwardness between us.

"Is this going to ruin our friendship?" I thought for a brief moment. I hadn't really ever thought that through and I wasn't about to start. As we stood in the elevator, I found my voice again.

"So, when do you want to tell them?" I asked. He paused for a moment before his eyes lit up.

"Well how about tomorrow? Seems like the perfect day to do it, don't you?" He asked.

"What's tomorrow?" It didn't really click at first.

"Valentine's day, silly." He chuckled.

"Oh, right! Of course, well sure. Let's do that then." I agreed, feeling dumb for not remembering. Especially when I did technically already start expecting Paul to put on a big show. He seemed pleased with my agreement, but as we joined the others downstairs, I got to thinking again how they'd react. Mostly George as I figured the poor dear would take it personal.

"There you are. Did you tell her?" Ringo was the first to see us as we made the lobby. I looked around at all of them.

"Tell me what?" I asked.

"I just told her we were going out." Paul responded.

"Will somebody fill me in?" I asked with a light laugh.

"Well I guess we have Ashley to thank for this anyway." George spoke up. I was still confused.

"Brian gave us the day to do whatever we wanted, if we're back here by 4:00. So, Paul in his infinite wisdom of what is and what isn't fun decided on dragging us all to a bloody museum." John piped up, sarcasm dripping from his voice. I had to laugh at him.

"So why am I getting thanked?" I wondered.

"Because it was you that got him off your own back yesterday." Ringo explained. So, I guess they all had heard about it by then.

"So today he's being super nice to all of us, hence the free day." Paul explained.

"I see. Well what are we waiting for?" I asked, personally excited to see a museum. I was sort of into stuff like that. John wasn't overly amused though, rolling his eyes at my enthusiasm.

"Figures you'd like walking around an old dusty building looking at stuff no one cares about." He grumbled as we headed out. I smiled and sidled up next to him as George went to hail a cab.

"But you like art, don't you?" I asked him.

"Art? Yeah. What's that gotta do with a museum?" He asked.

"New York City is full of wonderful museums filled with amazing art pieces from all over the world. I think you'll enjoy yourself more than you think." I informed him. He gave me a bewildered look as a cab pulled up for us all.

"For someone so young, you certainly have a wide scope of the world." He remarked. 

"I just listen a lot." I shrugged as I slid into the car.

"Well, I'll believe you, for now. But if this turns out to be really boring, I'm coming after you." He said, mostly joking. I just punched his arm lightly as the car took off. Paul was watching me with slight amusement but so were George and Ringo for a completely different reason. I noticed them whispering back and forth and giggling like little girls. I remembered what Paul had told me some days ago about how they had a bet going about John and I. Suddenly I wondered if George would be phased at all when I told him about Paul and I being together. I also knew I needed to correct them. Not now, but sometime soon. I didn't ask which museum Paul had decided on because I wanted to be surprised, but when we pulled up in front of the New York Met, I wasn't exactly surprised. It was the biggest museum with millions of exhibits.

"You chose the Met. This place is incredible." I grinned as I got out of the car.

"Have you ever been here?" Paul asked me as we broke away from the other three walking up to the grand doors. I shook my head no.

"But I've read a lot about it. I don't think anybody can do this place in a day, let alone a few hours." I replied.

"Well we only do have a few hours; I know George and Ringo want to check out Central Park too." Paul added. I felt a slight pang of anxiety in my heart, hearing that name. I turned to see where a section of park was near the museum and did a quick map calculation in my head. We were approximately 20 minutes from where John would be killed in 17 years.

"Oh alright." I responded though with not a care in my tone. My nightmares briefly flashed before my eyes, that street, the Dakota, the gunshot echo... I let out a deep breath I didn't know I was holding.

"Are you alright?" Paul noticed.

"Oh yeah, just taking in the Met, it's massive." I fibbed, putting on a smile. It didn't take long for us to get in, most everyone that saw the guys knew exactly who they were and let us all into the museum no questions asked.

"Certainly is big." George marveled as we all grouped together as a pack. It was definitely a busy spot and the lads were noticed right away. For a moment, I thought we'd not be able to enjoy ourselves and have to flee the premises on account of hormonal fan-girls. But surprisingly while they were recognized, nobody bothered them. I was glad for that, I didn't feel like running from any more crazy teenagers. The museum was amazing as I figured it would be and as I had predicted, John was pleased with all the artwork available to look at. I spread my time evenly with the four of them as we walked through the grand halls of the place and it was really nice for once to just be out doing something with them that was completely and totally ordinary. By about 1:30, the boys had enough of the museum. I could have stayed for a week, personally but I knew them. While this had been fun, they were looking for adventure. For me mostly, it was neat to see the Met in the 60's when the view on the world was so different from what it was back in my timeline. As we left, I caught up with John as the other three had gone on ahead.

"So that wasn't so bad, now was it?" I asked with a friendly smile.

"It was alright. Still boring." He replied with a cheeky smile that told me he was kidding around.

"You liked it, admit it. You were going on about every painting you laid your eyes on." I smiled. He nodded.

"It was pretty neat. And here I thought I'd be ready to gouge my eyes out after half an hour." He joked. I just snorted.

"Told ya." I teased as we approached Central Park.

"So what's so great about this place?" I called ahead to Paul, George and Ringo who were a few paces ahead. It was February in New York City. If anything, Central Park was both bare naked of any leaves and covered in snow.

"It's Central Park, Ashley. It's a landmark." Ringo replied, snapping his camera around like crazy; what at, I had no clue. Truthfully, I just didn't want to walk through the place and I especially didn't want to cut across to where it would one day be called Strawberry Fields after the very man I was walking alongside.

"Alright, it's pretty big though, do you wanna walk the whole thing?" I asked.

"Well that might take all day, let's just cut across and back." Paul suggested. The very thing I did  _not_ want to do.

"What's on the other side of here?" George asked, examining a map he picked up from the museum.

"The Dakota." I blurted without thinking.

"What's that?" John asked.

"It's a building where lots of famous people live." I answered simply, sorry I opened my mouth. Of course everyone was eager upon hearing that.

"Well let's go then, maybe we'll see someone famous." Paul said delightedly.

"Have you forgotten that you fall into that category?" I laughed as we took off, trying to not completely lose my mind.

"But that's why we want to find other famous people because they'll talk to us now instead of ignoring us completely." John explained with a goofy expression on his face. I just rolled my eyes at him.

"You guys are weird." I chuckled.

"And yet you still hang around with us." John winked. I turned my palms upward.

"I got no choice." I replied with a teasing grin. I tried to keep up my jovial mask as we made our way across the park. George and Ringo were plenty occupied taking pictures like a couple of tourists, I just walked with Paul and John who talked about the museum as well as the show later on that night. I contributed a little to the conversation but I was also kind of quiet. Central Park was pretty this time of year after all, the snow kind of made it seem like we were in some kind of fairyland forest. I'd never been before or even thought to visit my grandfather's memorial because well, I had no idea. I'd seen it on TV and online hundreds of times though and I knew as we approached the other side of the park that the mosaic was obviously not even there yet. And then there it was just like out of a dream, or in my case a recurring nightmare. The Dakota in all its architectural glory stood before us rising into the sky. I caught my breath in the back of my throat just seeing it across the street.

"Wow, it's beautiful." I said after a moment. What else was I going to say? ' _Hey look this is where John is shot to death within the next decade and a half._ ' Suddenly I was really angry. I don't know why anger was the first emotion, but something deep inside me wished with all my heart that I was from this time line and actually a long time friend of Paul's who had come to stay with him. I wished I was just a young woman from the 1960's who didn't know what was going to happen in the next few years or even several years. I wished I didn't know the boys were going to break up, that John and George were both going to die.

"Let's go across and check it out." George suggested. Ringo and Paul agreed, but John opted to stay where he was, and I didn't want to go any further either. Promising they'd be back shortly, the three of them took off leaving John and I standing on the pathway. Neither of us spoke for a while, I couldn't tell you what John was thinking but my mind was going all over. I watched Paul, George and Ringo go across and explore but my mind was still angry.

"Are you cold?" John's voice interrupted my thoughts after a few moments and I noticed I was shaking.

"No." I replied simply, not taking my eyes off the building in front of me. That's where my dad lived when he was very young. That's where he lived when he found out that his father was gone and never coming back. And somehow in that small span of time he had lived there, it later sunk in with him that he would hide who he really was and vowed to keep his daughter in the dark about her true lineage for 17 years of her life.

"What happened?" I whispered to myself.

"What's that?" John asked, thinking I was talking to him.

"Oh, it's nothing. Just thinking out loud." I answered, with a wave of my hand.

"That'll get you into trouble." He joked, noting I wasn't in an overly relaxed mood.

"Thinking?" I asked with a smile tugging at my lips. He nodded, pleased he'd got me to at least smile.

"Sorry, I'm just a little distracted is all." I apologized, trying to snap out of the funk I was in.

"Yeah, I noticed that. Did you want to go across with the others? You didn't have to stay with me." He assumed.

"Oh no, it's not that. It's..." I trailed off. I couldn't tell him. I noticed the other three coming back across the road.

"It's not important. Just random thoughts." I assured him, smiling again.

"Did you two stand there the whole time?" Paul asked, now red in the face from the cold biting his cheeks.

"We don't mind." I shrugged.

"You must be freezing." George commented.

"Oh sure, no one asks if I'm cold?" John joked, to which Paul just did an about face and pointedly asked

"Are you cold, Johnny?" At that I just started laughing and my weird mood was gone.

"We should get going though, we do have a big show tonight." Ringo then spoke. And with that, we left the view of the Dakota. I got a chill as I turned away, my recurring nightmare flashing in front of my eyes again.

_"John! Run_!" I heard myself scream in my head. I shook my head of the image of his dead body in front of me to see him being his usual goof off self backwards walking in front of George while talking about God knows what. Shaking off what was left of my mood, I ran up and linked arms with Paul and Ringo.

"Aren't we quite the tourists?" I asked in a delighted tone. And I intended to stay that way.


	33. THIRTY TWO

**THIRTY TWO:**

I was pretty preoccupied after that, once we got back to the hotel and rearranged to go to the venue for the concert, everyone's minds turned to the task at hand which was getting in and out pretty much unscathed by the screaming fans. I knew the routine by then; barrel through the wall of screaming teenagers to the inside where we would all be whisked away to the dressing room and we'd have to hang out there for the next few hours. The lads got to work right away tuning up and just chattering back and forth like a bunch of chipmunks. Me, I had time to do whatever I pleased unless one of them wanted me to do something specific for them. It was the first time in a couple of hours since our walk through Central Park that I had time to think again. I didn't want my mind to wander back to the thoughts I'd had staring at that building. But as I went to sit in the corner on a sofa type thing, took out my journal and flipped to a blank page, I knew the best thing to do was write about it. So that's what I did.

 

_"February 13, 1964_

_Well, I'm still here and I've been very busy still with the boys. Tonight is the second show in New York. Things with Paul have been pretty good, I suppose technically I'm dating him now. What would Sienna say? To be honest, part of me still believes this is all one huge delusion. Regardless, I'm enjoying myself. Things with John are going well too, we're really bonding. A lot has happened in the span of 24 hours. When I last wrote in here, I was waiting for the boys to do an interview, something I was always part of. But apparently their manager had this opinion of me that labelled me as a distraction to the band. Of course they weren't overly pleased to hear that and I really thought things were going to get ugly. Surprisingly enough though, I handled the situation all on my own. All four guys had told me beforehand that I meant the world to them in their individual ways; even John, though he said if I told anyone he's pretty much have to kill me... of course he doesn't mean that. Anyway, what I did last night, sticking up for myself resulted in their manager sort of backing off today and letting go of the reigns on the boys. Paul decided we all go to the New York Met which was absolutely incredible. I could have stayed there for days, but then they wanted to go explore Central Park and wouldn't you know it, we ended up on the other side, exactly where I did not want to be. That place has been the source of my nightmares since I arrived here. I'm sure you already know what I'm talking about. I stayed behind while ¾ of them went over to get a better look. I started feeling really strange just standing there staring at the building in front of me. For the first time, I really wished I was from this time and that I had know foreknowledge of what was to come in the next 5 years or even 20 years. I was angry that I knew what would happen in 1980 at that very location. I suppose deep down, I'm angry that I can't tell the one person who was standing right next to me the whole time..."_

 

I was so absorbed in my writing that I didn't notice Paul creep up on me.

"What are you writing so furiously about?" He wondered, glancing over my shoulder. I snapped the book closed, panicked for a second that he had been reading what I was writing.

"What did you see?" I asked him, quite defensively.

"Nothing, that's why I asked." He replied rather pointedly. I let out a small sight of relief.

"Just a journal of my time here." I told him.

"Well that's an interesting idea. Then you can show you friends and family when you go back to your time." He said, just a hint of sadness in his voice. At the mention of home again, I felt another pang of homesickness, but brushed it off.

"Oh I don't know if I'd ever show anybody. Most probably wouldn't believe me." I shrugged.

"Sienna might." He responded which made me smile a little.

"Maybe. She's always been open minded." I shrugged. Kind of like someone else I knew. Hint: him. I stuffed my book into my bag and just sat with my head back against the wall. I wasn't really thinking about anything specific and I didn't really care if Paul stayed or not.

"Are you bored?" He wondered, after a minute.

"Hmm? No, not really. Just relaxing. Shouldn't you be busy?" I returned.

"No, I'm fine. Besides, I'd rather sit with you than them." He smiled.

"They teasing you again?" I joked lightly as I brought my head forward and looked across the room at the other three who were talking and smoking.

"No, I just like you." He was being cute with me. I smiled a little.

"Well I'm flattered, sir." I joked. He tried to then lean in to kiss me but I pulled back.

"What are you doing?" I asked, kind of caught off guard for a moment. He seemed to remember where we were all of a sudden and sat back.

"They aren't looking." He noted, which he was right, they weren't. Just I don't know, thinking of my best friend beforehand kind of killed any moment he thought we had going. I suddenly felt really sad and didn't specifically know why. Without a word, I got up and left the dressing room. I walked down the hall a few meters before stopping and standing with my back up against the wall. No matter how hard I tried to shake it, I just couldn't get over the emotions I felt back at the park. Coupled with missing my best friend all of a sudden and home and the 21st century, technically dating Paul and my constant mental war over that was just all coming to a head. I just stood there, lost in my own negative thoughts for several minutes until someone brought me back down to earth.

"Hey, Ashley." I looked up to see Ringo. Sweet old Ringo.

"Hey. What's up?" I smiled for my friend.

"I would ask you the same thing. You've seemed a little...lost since we left the park." He remarked. Had I really? I didn't think so, but Ringo was pretty observant.

"Have I? I'm sorry, I'm just distracted." I sighed, looking at my shoes. Right about then, I so badly wanted to spill my guts to someone who would understand. Someone who would understand why I was so attached to John, why I felt conflicted that Paul was in love with me, I wanted someone to listen to why I was always having nightmares about John being shot to death which was his predestined fate. I wanted someone that understood why I was here even though I didn't fully understand myself. Ringo was nice to talk to and he always listened, but he wasn't that person.

"I've noticed. Do you want to go grab a coffee? This place should have some sort of place to get food." He suggested. I nodded silently and just followed him. By the time we found a place that had coffee and found a place to sit down, I still had no idea what to say.

"So tell me, what's got you all upset then?" He just came out with it. I looked away.

"It's nothing, really." I lied.

"You really expect me to believe that? Is it about what happened yesterday? Do you still feel unwanted?" He prodded.

"Oh God no, I haven't given that a second thought. It's over with. Believe me, Ringo nothing huge is wrong, I'm just wrapped up in my own thoughts. I suppose I'm a little homesick." That was partly true.

"Homesick? Well why don't you put in a call to your family? I'll pay for it." He offered. I shook my head.

"No, that wouldn't do any good." I replied.

"Why?" He asked.

"Uhh because I can't call the future?" I thought, sarcastically.

"It just wouldn't. I'm still sort of mad at them." I divulged.

"For getting a divorce? I don't blame you." He inferred. I looked down. Paul knew the truth; well most of the truth. What was holding me back from telling Ringo?

_"I'm from the future._ " I tried to say, but just made it past the word I.

"My parents aren't going through a divorce." I finally said after an awkward pause. I didn't know where I was going with this...

"They're not? But Paul said..." He trailed off.

"To protect my dignity. I actually just had a huge fight with them. They wronged me and so I asked to stay with Paul for a while." I confessed.

"And that's what's upsetting you?" He asked.

"I guess it must be. But don't worry, I'll be alright." I said, deciding to cap it off with that. Ringo looked like he didn't believe me for a minute, but decided to leave it.

"Alright, well if you ever want to make that phone call, the offer will stay on the table." He smiled. I nodded.

"I appreciate that, thank you. I guess we should get back to the others." I suggested. He agreed to that and off we went. When we got back to the dressing room, the other three were changed in their Beatle suits and I knew it must almost be time for the show. Ringo took off to get ready and I just stood in the doorway.

"What happened to you?" John asked me outright.

"I...just needed some air." I shrugged. I felt like I had used that excuse before. John raised an eyebrow at me not believing me and I didn't blame him.

"Are you unwell?" Paul asked, ever the concerned type.

"No, I'm fine. Don't you guys worry about me, just enjoy your show. This is your night." I smiled, trying to not be such a mood killer. Ringo as ready in no time and with that, I wished them luck as they headed out to start the show. As I followed them at a distance but down to the theater to my seat, I was no happier but I had to try. I didn't need the lads worrying about me when none of them could possibly help me. I hoped the show would be an adequate distraction and I would be right.

 

**********

 

The show was magnificent as I knew it would be and my mood did improve. Again, I knew the drill. The second they ran from the stage, so did I and in less than five minutes we were all piled into the car. Of course the boys were charged from their show and their mood was contagious. By the time we got back to the hotel, I was whooping and hollering right along with them which I think they were all glad to see. I followed them to their suite and they all wanted me to play for them.

"You guys want to hear more music? You just played all night." I laughed as Paul removed his tie and John tossed his jacket on the armchair. George fell onto the couch with what looked like a sandwich and I had no idea where he'd gotten it, and Ringo beside him.

"But we were playing it. You don't get to enjoy it if you're playing it." John said pointedly. I had to laugh at that as Paul walked past.

"You sound like you're feeling better." He said to me in a low voice.

"I am, sorry about earlier." I apologized, realizing I had probably upset him, shutting him down and leaving like that. I was still a little unsure of myself, but there was nothing I could do about any of it. I just had to live in the moment. I walked over to the piano with him.

"It's alright. I'm just glad you're okay." He smiled. I returned it and felt special again.

"You gotta quit being so miserable." I silently told myself. Sure this was tough, and I still sort of wished I was oblivious to the future, but I couldn't change that. That was the infuriating thing I think. I was here with them all but I was absolutely powerless.

"Where's the music?" John suddenly called from the other side of the room teasingly and I realized I was standing at the piano still with Paul.

"Hold your horses." I called back with a cheeky smile on my face. Paul left the piano to me and went to sit down.

"Any requests?" I asked. I got different song choices all at once and just started laughing. I had to be careful playing music for them, it had to be from this timeline. I couldn't just burst out with a Lady Gaga song, you know? Somehow though, my fingers just started pressing keys and I realized I was playing Somewhere Over The Rainbow from the film The Wizard of Oz. At least it was a safe song.

" _Somewhere over the rainbow way up high_

_There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby."_

My voice rang out clear with the piano. I didn't dare look behind me to my audience, I just focused on the words.

" _Somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue_

_And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true_

_Someday I'll wish upon a star_

_And wake up where the clouds are far_

_Behind me_

_Where troubles melt like lemon drops_

_Away above the chimney tops_

_That's where you'll find me..._ " I sang. The song was speaking to me on a much deeper level, everyone knew that song no matter how old they were. It was a song about life and no matter how bad it got, there would always be a happy place waiting for you, whether that be in your mind, or in the world. I thought it was a perfect song for that day.

"Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly

_Birds fly over the rainbow._

_Why then, oh, why can't I?_

_If happy little bluebirds fly_

_Beyond the rainbow._

_Why, oh, why can't I?"_

I finished and it was silent as I hit the last chord. For a second I thought they had all left until I turned around and all four of them were speechless.

"What?" I asked, feeling a little sheepish.

"You're an amazing singer, Ashley." Paul was the first to speak.

"I've sung for you guys before." I shrugged, standing up.

"But never with that much passion. What are you doing hanging around with us? You belong on Broadway." George complimented. I laughed lightly.

"Really guys, it was nothing." I assured them. But they were somehow convinced I was the next Marilyn Monroe or something. I suppose I had thrown my heart into the little show tune for the reason I described. Things had been bad back at home. I felt betrayed by my own parents and I didn't know why they had done that to me. Saying it was for my own protection wasn't good enough for me. They knew how much this band meant to me and their music. So did this time with the lads make this my 'happy place'? Somewhere over the rainbow? I was growing to accept that this was real as each day went by, I couldn't be dreaming or hallucinating this long. I figured I was back in the 60's with the Beatles for one reason and one reason only, to form a bond with my grandfather before the world and I lost him forever. But what if it wasn't? What if this was the place I longed to be in my upset after the fight with my parents? Did that mean I was supposed to be here and stay here? It seemed crazy but I had considered it before, though not in the same way. I recalled the dream I had the other night of being with Paul more than a decade later. Was it a vision and not a dream? That scared me slightly, but part of me wondered if it was true. I didn't know how to feel about it overall, if I would ever return to 2015 to my parents and Sienna and my life there as a young woman. But if this was my somewhere over the rainbow, I didn’t want to squander it by worrying. I was seeing things in a whole new light now.

 

 

 


	34. THIRTY THREE

**THIRTY THREE:**

Just from my prior knowledge of all things Beatles, I knew that the next day was yes, Valentine's Day but also the day we were supposed to take off for Miami Florida. Personally, I was looking forward to getting out of the bloody cold that was New York in February. When I woke up that morning then, I woke up fairly early so that I could pack my belongings. I knew it was only a matter of time before Paul came around with morning coffee and probably roses or something like that to mark the day. I had decided to fully accept my relationship with him. I had been skeptical of it and well everything else pretty much the day before, but like I had said to myself the night before, I couldn't do anything. All I could do was enjoy myself and live in the moment. Just as I was zipping up my case, lo and behold, there was the knock at the door. I smiled to myself a little as I went to open it.

"Good morning...what are you doing?" I burst out laughing. Paul was again doing his balancing act with the coffee, but now he had a single rose between his teeth. He handed me the coffees and I set them down on the table by the door before he swiftly removed the rose and handed it to me.

"For you. Happy Valentine's day." He smiled. I took the rose and gave it a sniff just like every girl did in the movies.

"That's very sweet of you, thank you." I replied.

"Well I would have brought you a dozen, but I'm not sure how many roses one can carry onto an airplane." He was dead serious, too and I wasn't the least bit surprised either. I just let out another airy laugh.

"You're cute." I complimented him as I picked up my coffee.

"Yes, I've heard that." He replied in jest. I just shook my head, amused.

"Are you guys all ready to go?" I asked, still hanging onto the rose. I didn't know what else to do with it. If I packed it, I would crush it. Paul nodded.

"Pretty much, we can take your bags down to the lobby to be loaded anytime." He replied.

"Well I'm ready whenever you are. I tell you, I'll be glad to get out of this cold."

"Oh me too, it'll be great to see some sun for a change. And it might help you feel better." Paul caught me off guard with the last bit as I started loading my arms with my carry on bags, still cautious of my rose.

"Me?" I asked, pushing the hair out of my eyes as I stood up.

"Yeah, well I just thought... since the train incident and your mood lately." I then caught him off guard. I smiled a little. I knew I had been a lot of trouble as of late. And of course Paul was always worried about me, even when we weren't 'dating', I suppose. I felt bad.

"I'm sorry I've been such a bother." I said.

"Oh no, no don't apologize, Ashley." Poor guy was getting flustered. I just chuckled.

"Miami will be better. I promise." And I intended to keep that promise.

"Now let's go, we shouldn't keep everybody waiting." I added, and we were off down to the lobby. It took the two of us, but we did it. I still managed to keep the rose intact as well. The other three lads were hanging out in the lobby on chairs all smoking and chatting away.

"Hey guys." I greeted them cheerfully as Paul and I set my bags by the door with the others.

"Ashley, there you are." John said, a little too melodramatically.

"Why must you always be such a drama queen?" I teased, going over to them all.

"Because, it's my true destiny." He replied without missing a beat while striking a pose. I snorted. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Paul standing with a hint of a smile on his face. I realized I was still holding onto the rose and that both George and Ringo were staring at it.

"Why am I not surprised?" I replied to John, trying to hide the flower behind my back. I'm not entirely sure why, just impulse.

"Where'd you get the pretty rose, Ashley?" Ringo then piped up. John turned to face me.

"You've got a rose? Lemme see." He demanded. I brought it around and he let out a low whistle.

"Someone's got a secret admirer." He teased me. I knew I was supposed to come clean about Paul and I, but for some reason, I felt embarrassed.

"It's a flower, what's the big deal?" Once it exited my mouth, I felt bad. Paul had left my peripheral vision and I felt a knot in my gut.

"What is wrong with you?" I thought.

"My dear Ashley, have you forgotten what day this is?" John asked all wide eyed.

"It's the day of love!" Ringo chimed in.

"So who is the lucky chap?" George asked, a smile plastered on his face.

"Just say it." I thought.

"Uh, Paul gave it to me." I revealed, after a moment. The three of them looked behind me and I turned too. He was standing, leaning against the wall chewing on his fingernails.

"Oh of course he did, the hopeless romantic." John teased his friend as Paul decided to join us.

"You guys..." I whined, half serious, half joking.

"So what's this mean? You two goin' steady or what?" George teased.

"Yeah, when's the wedding." Giggled Ringo.

"It's not like that, and I won't have you three teasing." I pointed my finger at them all, still messing around. The knot had unraveled and I was having fun with it.

"It's only teasing, _mother_." John piped up in a funny voice. I felt a twinge in my heart. He'd done it again. It had been a little while and I'd hoped he'd forgotten about calling me that. I swallowed hard and got rid of the twinge.

"So when's the flight?" I asked, being nonchalant and sitting on the arm of John's chair as I twirled the rose between my fingers. Paul stayed standing, and quiet which kind of worried me.

"Noon. Actually we should get going." John replied, getting up.

"But don't think we're done with this rose business." He teased again. I just poked my tongue out at him as he passed by along with George and Ringo. I stood up and approached Paul as he was still standing, looking pensive.

"Earth to Paul. You in there?" I asked, waving my hand in front of his face.

"Huh? Sorry." He snapped out of whatever thought he was deep into.

"You okay?" 

"Sure, fine." He shrugged, starting to walk away. I grabbed his shoulder.

"You're not. I know you. Spill, what's up with you?" I pressed, even though I had an inkling of what was up.

"You don't think I saw what you did with the flower?" He sounded almost angry. Yep, I'd guessed right.

"Idiot." I called myself in my head.

"Paul that... that didn't mean anything. You know how they are. They teased anyway." I explained.

"I don't think that's it. You're embarrassed by me. Just admit it." He muttered, sadly. My heart sank.

"No, no, no, no... Why the hell would you think that? You are an amazing, incredible guy and I'm pretty damn lucky you love me so much." I told him, not breaking eye contact. He smiled slightly.

"Well I do love you." He replied. I returned the smile and gave him a peck on the lips.

"I love you too. I'd never be embarrassed by you. Don't forget that." He needed to know that. Regardless of what drove me to hide the flower, he needed to know that I wasn't playing around. I cared a great deal for him. He brought me into a hug and we stayed there for a few moments.

"We should get going." I spoke after a moment, standing back. He nodded and we headed toward the door and outside into the car.

"Sorry, we're here." I apologized.

"What did you guys do, get lost?" Ringo asked, joking of course.

"Nah, they were probably making out." John added with a devilish glint in his eyes. Well... he wasn't completely wrong. I just laughed and rolled my eyes.

"Oh you goofballs." I smirked.

"Hey Ashley, ready to get out of the snowy weather?" George piped up, not teasing me.

"Oh absolutely. I can't wait for some sunny weather." I replied, happily. I thought so far the day was off to a pretty good start.

 

**Third Person POV**

Paul had lied to Ashley. He was never upset about the rose, even he knew that the lads would jump on her about it. He'd never get upset over something that trivial. It was something different entirely. Even on the ride to the airport and all the way through baggage and onto the plane. The pattern was the same. Ashley and John together laughing it up, ribbing on one another, pushing one another around, flirting back and forth like a couple of high school sweethearts. Paul knew Ashley had some sort of connection to John for a while now. Especially when she didn't want to give up on him at the beginning when he was often horrible to her. At first, Paul didn't think much of it and passed it off as platonic. Until George and Ringo began joking around about the two of them. Ashley denied it, but something had to be there. To Paul, they couldn't be just friends. He thought when Ashley started falling for him and vice versa that it would end, but it didn't. What went on that morning was just another example. Ashley adored John, he could tell. Why then was she with him, he wondered. He couldn't bring it up to Ashley standing in the hotel lobby. So he had bluffed it, made it resolvable in less than ten minutes. Ashley may have thought him an oversensitive fusspot for it, but he couldn't bring himself to talk about it yet. He had to think it through. If he ended it with Ashley, whose to say he could ever recover from it? He was the first to meet her, he knew all her secrets. Needless to say, of all the lads, he was the most quiet that day, deep in his own thoughts.

 

*********

 

**Ashley's POV**

"I can't believe it's raining!" I complained as I flopped myself on the couch of the guys' suite. I was all set to hit the water the second we landed in sunny Miami, only to find that it was anything but. It was a torrential downpour all the way from the plane to the hotel and I was not pleased.

"It won't last forever." Ringo pointed out. He was right, but still...

"Besides, we'll be here for a few days at least. I'm sure you'll catch some good weather." George added. I sat up and smiled at them both. As I did, I mentally searched my repertoire of facts on them and realized Miami was the last stop for them in America. When they said 'American Tour' back in this day in age, I guess they meant like 3 cities and that's all. What did that mean now? Would we be heading back to England? Would they be staying in London again, or would they be leaving to visit their respective families? What would I do? Sitting there, I started to worry again. I had no family to go back to here, would I still tag along with Paul? I mean we were technically an item now...

"Ashley? Hello? You in there?" George snapped me back to attention. He had moved and come to sit next to me on the couch. The other three were nowhere to be seen.

"Hi, sorry, I was just...lost in thought." I shook my head fast, trying to give him my full attention. He smiled and pulled a box onto his lap.

"I just... wanted to give you something. I know we aren't a thing anymore...but its Valentine's, so I hope you like it." George said, kind of in an awkward tone. I felt bad for a moment.

"Oh George, that's so sweet of you." I told him kindly as I took the box and opened it. Inside was a lovely light pink sweater, it looked expensive.

"Oh my gosh...it's lovely." I said, holding it up.

"I hope it fits." Was George's answer.

"Oh I'm sure it will. Thank you so much." I hugged him.

"You're welcome."

"Hey, what are you two up to?" I heard John's teasing tone again as I sat back. The missing three had returned.

"I just gave Ashley my Valentine's gift." George spoke up.

"Oh we're doing that now?" Ringo asked. I looked around.

"What, you all got me something?" I laughed.

"Of course, you're our Ashley." John winked. Ringo ran off to get what I assumed was something for me as Paul and John came to sit. Paul was still quiet and I wondered why. Our chat back at the other hotel had resolved whatever issue there had been. I still had the rose too, it was in a cup of water back in my room. I still knew he wanted to spill the beans about us being together to the others, but so far he hadn't said anything. Was I supposed to bring it up? I didn't know. I thought that he probably didn't like the fact that I'd suddenly turned into everyone's valentine that day, but he could have said something. Ringo came rushing back moments later with what was just a brown paper bag.

"I picked it up at the airport. It's not much but..." He trailed off. I took out a heart shaped box of chocolate. I laughed and gave him a hug.

"It's sweet, thank you." I told him. It was beginning to feel like my birthday or something, it was sort of weird.

"You're up, Johnny." George teased, looking to the only one who still hadn't presented his 'gift'. He had gotten quiet all of a sudden and I noticed.

"Well I'm not doing it with all of you here." He protested.

"Why not?" I piped up, curiously. For a second, he almost looked sheepish! No, it couldn't be. The great John Lennon was shy! He paused a moment before absentmindedly rolling his eyes.

"Oh fine. Here." He said in kind of a gruff tone, as he dug a small black box out of his jacket pocket. I knew that tone all too well, but I let it slide because he was obviously masking the fact that he was anxious about whatever he got me that he really didn't have to. He handed me the box and I opened it. When I did, my breath was taken away. Inside the small box was a gorgeous silver heart locket necklace. The pendant itself had intricate engravings on it and it hung from a delicate chain.

"Oh my God..." I whispered, not knowing what else to say. I was absolutely blown away. Ringo gave a low whistle.

"Well I think we have a winner." He stated, looking up at John who was trying as hard as he could to maintain a stone face.

"It's beautiful, John. Thank you so much." I finally found my voice.

"Yeah well, I saw it and thought you'd really like it." He replied. I could see the slightest hint of crimson in his cheeks and tried not to laugh.

"I do, I really do. I'll cherish it forever." I smiled, trying too to keep a lid on the tears that were threatening to fill my eyes. I was 100% touched by his gift. It was personal, sweet and I knew I'd probably never take it off. I opened the locket; there was no picture in it, but I was sure I could rectify that in time. What would I put in it? Sienna? My parents? Just thinking of them made my heart dip a bit. I'd decide later. I put the necklace on and the little present party started breaking up. John was the first to go and I knew I had to catch him alone and properly thank him for the necklace. I knew it must've not been cheap just by the look of it. Sure, each and every one of these guys was extremely well off, being rock stars and all, but still... Paul was next to leave. I remembered our little misunderstanding from earlier and wondered if he was still upset about it. He had seemed fine initially, once it had been resolved, but for the entire flight, he was unnaturally quiet. I knew I wanted to take my gifts back to my suite first before I could decide which one to go after, so I did that. As I left, I thanked George and Ringo again for their gifts and promised to catch up with them later. Once back in my suite, I put away my new things and glanced again at the rose Paul had given me. A smile flickered across my face and I decided to go find him first and make sure he was okay. Looking out the window, I noticed it was still pouring rain and frowned. I really did hope it cleared up soon. Taking a jacket with me just in case he had gone outside, I left my room and headed for the elevator. To my surprise however, Paul was in the elevator!

"Oh, hi." I smiled at him.

"Hey." He replied absentmindedly, glancing to my new necklace hanging around my neck. I felt nervous all of a sudden. Something was clearly up.

"You...alright?" I asked.

"I'm fine, I was just going for a walk." He answered. He was lying, I knew it. I paused.

"Do you want company?" I ventured.

"No, no I think I'd be better off alone." Was his answer. I felt my heart dip again. Was he mad at me? What had I done? The elevator reached the bottom and the door opened. He left without another word. I wanted to go after him, but something told me to leave him alone. In the lobby, not many were there, but I did catch one familiar face in the corner in an armchair browsing some kind of magazine. Smiling, I walked over and peered over the top of his magazine.

"Hiding?" I asked, amused. John looked up.

"Just bored." He replied.

"You? Bored? I figured you'd be at the nearest bar trying to pick up girls, isn't that your usual way?" I teased. He just looked back down at his magazine.

"Too rainy to go out." Was his answer to that. What was with everyone? First Paul was giving me the cold shoulder and now John was acting all aloof.

"It's because of the necklace." I thought. And then it hit me.

"Does he like me? Oh God, what if the necklace is some sort of romantic gesture?" I thought, sirens instantly going off in my head. I bit my lip as I stood back, trying to choose my next words carefully.

"I uh, wanted to thank you again for the necklace. I really do love it. It must've not been easy to give me something so fine in front of the others." At that, he set the magazine down.

"I was overthinking it. I'm glad you like it." He finally showed a flicker of a smile.

"It must have been expensive, I hope you didn't break the bank just buying it." I offered a small joke. He paused before standing.

"Well, I think you're worth going a little broke over." He winked and I felt my mouth go dry. What was happening?

"This can not happen." I thought.

"Tell him! Say I'm your granddaughter from the future." I had to. Before this got out of hand. I could see it, he cared for me. I knew we already had a bond that was pretty much indescribable, and the others had joked abut us being like an old married couple, I mean Paul had thought that I was in love with John before I clarified I wasn't...

"I..." I started to say. But I couldn't say it!

"Well that's very sweet of you." I said instead, giving him a hug. I knew he wasn't keen on the gesture, but he was warming up to it. Just then, I heard footsteps behind me and stepped back.

"We should get going soon, I think." I heard Paul say over my head. I didn't feel any more at ease as I turned around.

"Yeah, you're right. Let's go grab the others." John answered, sounding slightly flustered. He took off without saying anything else, leaving me with Paul. He wouldn't even look me in the eye. What had started off as a great day with everyone doting on me had quickly turned into 2/4 being completely weird and unlike themselves around me and I didn't like it. I knew we were heading out to the concert venue and also knew my bag was back in my room.

"I uh...I'll be back." I muttered, in a low voice to Paul who didn't seem to be listening, before I then took off back to my room. Once there, I found myself tearing up. through my blurry vision, I saw my bag by the door and grabbed it. My disguise was already on; it was part of my morning routine now.

"Stop crying." I ordered myself as a tear slipped through my lashes. Why was I so unhappy? Paul was just pretending I didn't exist all of a sudden and not speaking to me and John might just have been in love with me... suddenly I just wanted to stay in the room in my pj's and cry. This wasn't how things were supposed to go. Just before I could make up my mind to stay home, there was a knock at my door. I looked through the peep hole and saw it was Ringo. I also realized more than one tear had fallen from my eyes and he would definitely know I was sad.

"It's Ringo, he's your friend." I reasoned as I opened the door. As I predicted, the first words out of his mouth were

"Ashley...why are you crying?" I wiped my eyes and sniffed.

"Don't worry about it..." I fibbed. Ringo wasn't gonna let it go though.

"Ashley..." He gave me a knowing look. I sighed.

"I'm just having a moment, that's all." I really didn't want to spill my relationship problems onto poor Ringo, he wasn't my mother or my girl friend. Plus, the other half of my issue I couldn't even discuss with him, because Ringo didn't know I was from 2015.

"Is it about your family?" He guessed.

"Yeah..." It wasn't exactly a lie.

"Remember I said you could call them anytime you wanted. Do you want to?" He was such a sweetie. I dried my eyes more.

"Sure, maybe later. Right now, you guys have a show to do." I replied, trying to distract him. I still didn't feel better, but I wasn't about to ruin the lads' night with my emotions. I trusted Ringo enough though to not blab about my crying to the others, but I still hoped he was as far as it went.

"Maybe things will work out this evening." I thought, though it didn't seem likely.

"Alright. Yeah, we should get going." Ringo answered with a smile. And we left.

 


	35. THIRTY FOUR

**THIRTY FOUR:**

_Dear John,_

_I really don't know any other way to lead into this than just to say it. I'm your granddaughter. I know you probably think I'm insane for saying so, but the truth is that I'm not from out of town, and I've only know Paul maybe an hour longer than the rest of you. I'm from the future; December 2015 to be exact and I somehow ended up back in this year with all of you..._

It sounded crazy even when I wrote it out! Sighing, I scribbled it out and ripped out the page, crumpling it and stuffing it into my bag. I had no idea how to even begin, but I knew I had to do something. I couldn't have John falling in love with me. As for Paul...well I could only deal with one crisis at a time.

"Why do you have to tell him? Just be straight with him, say that you're happy just staying pals." I thought. It seemed the easiest way out. Whichever way I went though, I risked setting him off which I didn't want to do. We had been so good lately. Sitting there in the corner of the lads' dressing room, no one seemed to notice or care that I wasn't in the group laughing and chatting with them. Paul still seemed quiet just from my observance but he was talking with his band mates a little. It ate at me that I didn't know what was bothering him.

"Deal with both of them after the show." I reasoned. I didn't want to start any drama beforehand that would ruin the show for either of them. Flipping to a new page in my notebook though, I decided to write down my feelings in a journal entry.

 

_February 14, 1964_

_I'm not even going to write about how today is the wrong concert date_ **(It totally was too)** _because I've got too much else on my mind. Today was supposed to be great. I was finally getting out of the cold northern states in winter and heading for sunny Miami Florida, only to find that it was pouring rain once we got here. Today was also Valentine's day and it started off wonderful with Paul bringing me a rose. Only now, he won't speak to me, or look at me. The other lads gave me gifts too and John gave me this beautiful locket necklace which is problem number two. I think he might have feelings for me. So I'm completely freaking out for two reasons..._

 

I didn't get very far in my entry because there was suddenly someone standing over me. I looked up and saw it was Paul.

"Hey." I said, snapping my book closed and standing up.

"Hey. Can we talk?" He asked. Those three words were the most dreaded ones in any relationship, even if it was completely unconventional. I swallowed hard.

"Sure." I answered, following him out of the room.

"I want to apologize for whatever I did to make you upset with me." The words came tumbling out of my mouth. Paul shook his head.

"It's not your fault, Ashley. It's clear that we'll always have feelings for one another, but I... I really don't think this is going to work out." Was I hearing right? I had finally accepted this relationship and wasn't weirded out by it, I actually felt something for him and now it was over?

"O-Oh..." I trailed off, suddenly feeling like someone had sucker punched me right in the gut.

"I'm sorry. I hope we're still friends...I just can't compete with him." He admitted, looking kind of sad. I did a double take.

"Compete with who?" I demanded.

"John of course. It's blatantly obvious." He answered. Well damn...that's what all this had been about?

"Oh my God! We've been over this, I don't love him." I cried, trying to keep it together. As crazy as it sounded, I didn't want this to end.

"You may say that, but your heart is saying something else. Besides, I know he adores you. Who am I to stand in the way of what will make you both happy?"

"Tell him!" I told myself. I could tell Paul, he already knew I was from the future, he was open to the concept. I could tell him I was John's granddaughter.

"So do it." I thought. I took a deep breath.

"I'm not in love with John. I just have a connection to him because..." I looked around.

"We're related." I revealed, in a low voice. Paul's dark eyes widened in surprise.

"You...You're related?" He asked, keeping his voice low as well. I nodded silently.

"Wh-Why didn't you tell me before?" He was definitely dazed.

"I...didn't think you'd believe me, I didn't want him to find out...a whole list really. But I am related to him back in my time." Paul still looked like a deer in the headlights.

"So then you're..." He trailed off.

"Ashley Lennon, granddaughter of John." I stuck out my hand, reintroducing myself. Paul took my hand.

"Wow...so you aren't in love with him...oh my God Ashley, I'm so sorry." He instantly looked embarrassed.

"Hey, don't apologize. You couldn't have known." I shrugged.

"But I could have, you know. You do look a lot like him." He told me.

"Yeah, I know." I nodded.

"So...are you gonna tell him?" I shook my head.

"Not yet. It's too big." I decided.

"Well what's the big deal if he knows? If he's your grandfather in your future, then he already knows you...or will know you." Paul tried to use the correct tense. While that should have been funny, just knowing Paul didn't know what was going to happen to John in 17 years made it sad.

"He um...doesn't..." I trailed off. No, I couldn't say it.

"He doesn't what?"

"I'll tell him. I just need to find the right time." I said instead.

"Well you might wanna do it soon, because I'm pretty sure he's in there right now thinking about how much he loves you." He was right of course. I needed to set the record straight. Maybe it wouldn't wait until after the show but by then, I was on a roll. I'd just told Paul my biggest secret. I nodded.

"Yeah, I'll talk to him." I answered, turning to go but Paul grabbed my hand.

"About us though...are we still okay?" He asked. I breathed a small sight of relief. He wasn't breaking up with me.

"Yes. Of course we're okay." I replied before going back to the dressing room. I walked right over to John and he looked up.

"There she is." He smiled, his old behavior returning.

"Hi, yeah. Can I talk to you...alone?" I asked, getting right to the point. He gave me a funny look, but complied. I ignored George and Ringo just in case they were making faces, I couldn't deal with their silliness right now.

"Am I in trouble, _mother_?" John teased, once we left the room. I bit the inside of my cheek.

"No...I just think we need to clear the air. I think...maybe you might have some misunderstandings about our..." I didn't want to say relationship.

"Friendship..."  John gave me a quizzical look.

"Alright...what is it you think I'm so misunderstood on?" He crossed his arms.

"It's been...theorized that you might have feelings for me...like romantically." I tripped over my words.

"Well who's saying that?" He asked, furrowing his brow.

"That...that's not important... I just want to...um, clarify..." I trailed off.

"Ashley, listen. I did like you, even thought maybe we'd end up together one day when we first met, but now... I really like you and care about you. You've come to mean more to me than I ever thought you would, but not romantically. To be quite honest, you feel an awful lot like a little sister to me." He explained. Two things caught me off guard. The first was how open he suddenly was about how he felt. The second was that I had been wrong! Everyone had been wrong. John wasn't in love with me! I was like family to him. That was probably the most personable thing he'd ever said to me and he didn't even realize why I thought that was so special.

"Well...that's just funny then because I've said to... well Paul at least, that you're like an older brother to me. I just wanted to make sure..." I trailed off again.

"You've been listening to the others a little too closely, Miss Ashley. They'll say anything just to get you goin." He stated. He was right of course. I nodded, feeling a hell of a lot better.

"So...earlier, back at the hotel..."

"I'm not a sentimental guy in public, Ashley. You were right when you said that it was hard for me to give you that necklace with the others around. It was. Ideally, I wanted to give it to you alone and say that I was probably the only one left who hadn't given you anything memorable or left you with anything to remember me by. I don't know how long you're gonna stay with us, but if and when you ever decide to go back home and I...well never see you again, that necklace would remind you that I'll always be thinking about you." He told me and I felt choked up. When he wanted to, he really could say the most wonderful things.

"You really are like my little sister. We argue, we tease, we tear strips off of one another, but at the end of the day I'd kill a man to protect you." I hugged him before he could see my tears. What he said had double meaning, but only I knew that.

"Thank you. That really means a lot to me." I gushed, blinking back my tears before I stood in front of him again.

"Hey John, we're on in ten." Paul poked his head out of the door.

"Yeah...yeah it's show time." He nodded.

"Well go on then." I smiled, waving him off. he went back into the room and Paul came out again.

"How'd that go?" He asked me.

"Good. Very good. But I won't bore you with the details, you have a show to do." I smiled, noting his bass in his hands.

"That I do. See you after?" He asked.

"Of course." I answered, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

 

********

 

I woke up the next morning to loud knocking on my suite door.

"Okay, okay, I'm coming... hold on..." I grumbled, half awake as I stumbled toward the door, absentmindedly tying my bathrobe around my waist. I opened the door to face Paul who looked about as eager as a kid in a candy store.

"Where's the fire?" I mumbled, trying to push my hair out of my face.

"You're still asleep?" He asked, amused.

"Well you guys did have a concert last night, I figured you'd still be comatose yourself..." I pointed out. He just chuckled.

"Open your curtains." He asked. An odd request, but I walked over to the nearest window and yanked the curtains open to reveal a gorgeous sunny morning!

"When did it stop raining?" I demanded, instantly perking up.

"I dunno, does it matter? It's sunny, it's hot, let's hit the beach!" He exclaimed. It was my turn to laugh, but I was game. After the day I'd had yesterday, I deserved some good weather and waves.

"Sure, just let me change. I'll meet you in the lobby. The others coming?" I asked.

"Yeah." Was his reply.

"Okay, I'll see you shortly." I smiled before I closed the door and ran off to my room to change. I had a swimsuit, I'd gotten one before leaving for America. I didn't really like it, but it was the style back then.

"Finally I can relax a little." I thought to myself as I got ready. I was happy things had worked out the day before, but I still had been under a lot of stress lately. I hoped maybe this would be a turning point. Trying not to think too much, lest I disrupted my good mood, I threw sort of a cover up dress on over top of the bathing suit that hugged my body in an odd way, but it'd have to do and headed down. I didn't wear my disguise or anything, besides, I thought the wig would get destroyed in the salt water, so I just tied my dark hair in a thick braid and hoped any passers by wouldn't notice or care. When I reached the lobby, I caught sight of the four of them instantly and had to bite my tongue to keep from bursting into laughter. I had completely forgotten how utterly ridiculous men's swim wear was back in that day.

"Hey guys." I greeted them cheerfully nonetheless. I noticed instantly that both Paul and George were giving me the once over and I realized I'd never been dressed so... lightly before. Instead of getting uncomfortable, I went with it. Whistling through my teeth I said

"Hey, my eyes are up here." George went slightly pink as John dissolved into laughter.

"Good on ya, Ashley. Put them in their place." He commented, still laughing. I just rolled my eyes. Boys.

"C'mon, let's hit the beach before it decides to rain on us again." I remarked, really just wanting to have a good time.

"Great idea. Let's go." Ringo agreed. And we were off.

The beach was the ticket place to be that day, it was morning, but still pretty hot and I was going to eat up every last second of it. On our way to the beach, the lads and I grabbed something quick to eat and then found a roost on the sand for the day. They all had proper beach towels; I just had a bath towel but no one seemed to notice. John, George and Ringo instantly took off for the water and I was going to follow once I took off the silly cover up.

"Do you want any sunblock, Ashley?" Paul made me jump; I thought he had gone as well as my back was to him.

"Um, no I think I'll be okay. Thanks." I smiled at him, shading my eyes from the bright sun.

"You sure? The sun might rip the skin right off you today." He looked up, squinting. I chuckled at the thought.

"Fine, fine. I'll put it on." I decided, taking the bottle from him. He watched me as I lathered up, but I really didn't notice.

"So I was thinking...I promised you that first date and I haven't followed through on it yet." He suddenly said. I looked up.

"Well that's okay. You've been busy." I assured him.

"No, but you deserve at least a dinner out. How about tonight?" I felt all tingly inside. Paul was asking me on a date.

"Sure. Dinner tonight sounds great." I agreed.

"Hey, what's taking you guys so long?" A breathless voice asked behind us. We turned to see a sopping wet George. His hair looked like it had seen a cyclone and his legs were covered in sand.

"We're coming...what happened to you?" I chuckled.

"I'm not great at dodging waves." Was his sheepish response.

"Well I'll show you. My family has been on holiday lots of times to the coast." I offered, suddenly becoming enveloped in the fun. George seemed to like that idea, so I took off with him to the water.

"There you are, took you long enough." John greeted. I just splashed water at him. Of course he returned it but I jumped out of the way, laughing in delight. Paul must have followed George and I because he was suddenly jumping around in the water with the rest of us. I spent some time teaching George how to not get pummeled by the waves and once he had gotten the hang of it, I went to just goofing off with the four of them. It was wonderful just to play in the salt water like a bunch of children and every worry, every care just went right out of my mind. Before long, the four of us had swam out quite a distance. My feet still touched the bottom but the water was up to my chin. While the four of us just bobbed there, I decided to raise kind of a big question.

"Where are we going after this?"

"I'm not entirely sure. Back to London I suppose." Was Paul's response.

"Does that mean you're going home, Ashley?" George then asked me, a hint of sadness in his eyes. I caught my breath.

"I...don't know." Was my honest response. Suddenly all my worries were coming back.

"Well why worry about it then? We're here for another few days, let's make the most of it." John reasoned. That seemed a good enough answer for the lads for now, but my mind started wandering again. Where would I go when I went back to London? I'm sure the lads had a break coming up; they'd go back to Liverpool maybe to see their families.

"Just stay with Paul." I thought. True, we were together now but what did that mean? When would I leave? There were too many unanswered questions and I didn't like it.

 

*********

 

The day was going wonderfully. After my fretting, the boys must have noticed I was unhappy on account of how quiet I had gotten so they started a game with me. Sort of like Marco Polo, but it was entertaining. We spent hours in the water, only breaking once for lunch but we were back in the water in no time. My mind went off everything again and I decided it was just time to have fun and forget about it all for now. I remembered I was supposed to have dinner with Paul that evening, so as the afternoon went on, I grew more excited about my first official date with him. But what I didn't know was I'd never get to.

 

 

 


	36. THIRTY FIVE

**THIRTY FIVE:**

 

It was getting late in the day and I was pretty sure we were going to call it a day shortly. The sun was still high, but moving its way to the west ever so steadily. I was closer to the shore with Paul and Ringo while George and John had gone further out. I didn't notice, I was too busy chatting with the other two about their shows and their favourite parts. It wasn't until I heard John yell that I knew something was wrong. My head whipped around.

"What's wrong?!" I yelled back. But I knew before the words were out of my mouth. I saw John but George... Paul turned around too.

"What's going on? Where'd George go?" He asked, but I took off toward John, half running through the water, half swimming before I could answer.

"Ashley, go back to shore with the others and get help." John ordered as I came within earshot. I felt adrenaline pump through my veins.

"He went under." I realized, trying to keep my voice steady.

"Yeah, he did and if you don't hurry we might never find him." Was his blunt reply as he made ready to dive under the water!

"What are you doing?" I demanded, jumping in front of him.

"The lifeguards might be too late. I have to find him." Fear clutched my heart.

"No...no it's too dangerous..." I trailed off. If George had gone under and was maybe swept out by an undertow or God knows what... I dared not think it. But the same could happen to John. I couldn't let him do it. I was already panicking, picturing tomorrow's headlines if the worst would come to pass

**"GEORGE HARRISON DROWNS IN MIAMI.** " It was too horrible. Much more horrible if both of them became lost...

"Let me go." I decided.

"Ashley, no! You'll drown!"

"So will you!" I protested, trying hard not to cry. I was shaking by then. John laid a hand on my shoulder.

"I'll be fine. Now go." But impulse took over. I didn't go back to shore. I jumped forward and dove beneath the waves, swimming downward as fast as I could possibly go. I expected him to follow me, yank me out of the water and call me crazy, stupid or God knows what else...but he didn't. Immediately, I began searching for anything that even looked like a human underneath the water. The visibility wasn't great, but I was not giving up.

"You're such an idiot, you're gonna drown and then you'll both be dead." A little voice in my head scolded.

"No, no don't dare think it." Deeper I went, scouring the seaweed beds for George. It seemed hopeless and I knew deep down my chances of finding him were slim to none, but I couldn't just let poor George drown! He hadn't been very strong against the water all day anyway and I had taught him how to get around the big waves...

"So if he dies, it's your fault." The voice was back. I was pretty sure I was crying the further I went, as I was finding absolutely nothing.

"Go back. Just go back." I thought. But my stubborn blood drove me forward. My lungs were screaming for air but I didn't care; I wasn't quitting.

"Come on, George! Don't do this." I thought, getting frantic. My chest ached from the lack of oxygen in my system and my vision was getting fuzzy. I knew if I didn't return to the surface soon, I would indeed drown.

"Damn..." I thought. I couldn't even fathom what this would mean if George was...gone.

"It's all your fault." Just as I was about to give in to my dire need for oxygen, something caught my eye. I wasn't certain, but despite being nearly out of time, I dove deeper toward a section of the seaweed bed that looked like...

"George!" I nearly screamed aloud before I realized I was underwater. Without thinking, I grabbed ahold of him by the shoulders and pulled as hard as I could upward. It was then that I lost the breath I had been holding for so long. I tried desperately to lift him over my head toward the surface.

"Come on!" Water filled my mouth and into my lungs as I gave George one last push toward the surface. Everything went dark.

 

*********

 

_I woke up in a hospital bed. Looking around me, all I could see was white walls, a white ceiling and white floor._

_"Where am I?" I thought as I pulled the covers back and stood up. my legs ached like I'd just run a marathon and I was dressed in a grey nightdress; my dark hair down around my shoulders in waves. Confused and dazed, I walked to the door of my room and opened it. On the other side was a corridor where nurses and doctors were milling around._

_"I'm in a hospital?" I thought. One nurse caught sight of me._

_"What are you doing up?" She demanded, coming over and pushing me back to bed._

_"Where am I?" I asked, feeling scared. The last thing I remembered was going after George in the water. He had gone under..._

_"You're at Lennox Hill Hospital in New York City. What's the last thing you remember?" The nurse told me as I got back into bed._

_"New York City? I was in Miami... I was rescuing George from drowning...where is he?" I demanded, looking around. The nurse shushed me and mumbled something about me losing my mind._

_"Miss, you've been in New York City for weeks. You were involved in an attack outside the Dakota two weeks ago. You suffered a severe concussion and you've been in a coma ever since then. You really must rest." She told me._

_"The Dakota...?" I murmured. But then it hit me. Oh no..._

_"Wh-What's the date today?" I demanded._

_"December 22, 1980." She responded._

_"Oh my God..." I said to myself. What had happened? Had I jumped through time? I couldn't remember the night...the attack the nurse mentioned. It had to have been..._

_" **No**!" I heard my own voice scream in my head as I heard the gunshots echo. I'd tried to get there in time but I had fallen and whacked my head off the pavement... I was too late._

_"J-John..." I choked as I sat there in the hospital bed in shock, tears pouring down my face. He was dead. It was two weeks later, he was dead and it was my fault. The nurse pursed her lips and left me. I heard her whisper to someone outside that I needed sedation and transported to the psych ward, due to a mental breakdown. Something took hold of me and I jumped out of bed and toward the window. I had to find Paul. He'd help me, he'd know me. I threw the window open and knew I could make the jump, I was only two floors up. without thinking, I jumped._

_"Hey!" I heard the nurse yell as I flew toward the ground. My head hit the hard, cold pavement and everything went dark._

 

"Ashley... Ashley..." I came around to my name being repeated over and over. My eyes opened to see Paul over me, his face twisted with worry. Gasping, I instantly sat up.

"Oh my God..." I gasped, my heart racing. The damned dream had returned with a vengeance. Paul laid both hands on my shoulders to steady me before I realized I was back in my hotel room. I looked around as it all came back. The beach, George going under, John readying himself to rescue his mate, me going instead, the water, the seaweed...

"Where's George?" I demanded.

"He's fine Ashley. You saved his life. He'll be coughing up seawater for a few days, but he'll live. He owes his life to you." Paul told me. I let out a sigh of relief, trying to push that awful nightmare out of my mind. I had to focus on the now which was that I had succeeded in rescuing George.

"Wh-what happened? Why did I black out?" I asked.

"Because you nearly drowned, yourself. John was supposed to go after George. You stopped him." Paul related, his tone changing slightly. I remembered. I swore under my breath. Well that was a boneheaded move if I ever heard one.

"I did...it was stupid of me." I admitted.

"He was going to go after you, but once you took off the first time, I put two and two together and Ringo and I got help. I didn't know you'd gone after George until they pulled you up, unconscious." He recounted, looking almost scared. I knew I'd put a scare into him.

"I'm sorry." I murmured, softly. He cracked a small smile.

"What matters is you're both okay." He replied, pulling me into a hug. I welcomed it; not only because I was feeling slightly overwhelmed myself from what had just happened, but the dream had frightened the hell out of me again. They were getting more and more elaborate but the outcome was the same all the time. As I was silent for a few moments though, it dawned on me.

"Is John furious with me?" I dared ask. He had to be, I mean I had just nearly killed myself against his orders to go back to shore in a fools attempt to save George. While I was successful... I knew he'd probably still have a thing or two to say about it. Paul sat back and thought a moment.

"I think he was more worried than anything." That wasn't exactly an answer.

"So he is mad." I concluded.

"Only because you mean a lot to him." Paul answered, with a knowing look. I sighed.

"I should probably go see George at least, make sure he's doing alright." I said after a minute or so. I was still in my swim clothes, so I knew I had to change first.

"Of course; he wants to see you too. He's been asking of you."

"Well how long have I been out for?" I wondered, getting off the bed and looking outside. It was dark out.

"A few hours, but that's understandable. You did just go through a lot." Paul replied but I knew I had missed dinner; our planned dinner together and I felt bad.

"Oh...dinner. I'm so sorry." I lamented, covering my mouth with my hands. He shook his head and smiled.

"We can reschedule. It's not a problem." He was so sweet. I let out a breath as I excused myself to go change. I just threw on a blue dress that I had laying around and let my still wet hair out of it's braid before I declared myself ready enough to go. Paul was waiting for me, so the two of us left together. Neither of us spoke during our walk to the lads' suite, there wasn't much to say. I was too busy being grateful to God that George was alive and well, cursing myself over the awful nightmare and dreading John's overall reaction to the whole ordeal.

"We finally got to a great place and now it could all be ruined." I thought sadly as we approached the door. Paul opened it and let me go inside first. The first two I saw were Ringo and George himself looking seemingly unaffected by the incident.

"Ashley, you're up." Ringo remarked, getting to his feet along with George.

"I'm up." I smiled a little.

"Are you okay?" Sweet George asked _me_.

"Am I okay...I should be asking you that!" I exclaimed, grabbing him into a bear hug, just utterly relieved. He hugged me in return.

"I'm alright, Ashley. Thank you...for saving me." He replied, stepping back and giving me a lopsided smile.

"Anytime." I smiled in reply.

"You really have to stop scaring us all half to death, Ashley." Ringo let out a chuckle.

"Oh well, I keep the excitement alive that way." I winked. Just then, John came out of another room and saw me standing there talking with Ringo. I saw him too and froze.

"So you're alive, are you?" John remarked, in an all too familiar sharp tone. It cut me to the heart.

"Yeah...I uh..." I trailed off, but he just blew past me and out the door. I wanted to cry then.

"It's your fault." I thought.

"Don't mind him, he'll get over it." Paul laid a hand on my shoulder, but I wasn't comforted.

"I um... I think I should go. Goodnight everyone." I said softly, turning to go. No one stopped me, not even Paul. I left the room and headed back to my own suite with tears brimming in my eyes. I kept them in until I was behind my closed and locked door. As I slid the bolt into place, the tears came. I leaned my forehead against the closed door just crying. It was everything. Nearly losing George, nearly drowning, the awful dream and then John completely snubbing me after we'd gotten to such a great place. He'd called me family only hours ago...and now this.

"Miami was supposed to be better." I cried to myself. This wasn't better.

 

********

 

Getting to sleep that night was no easy task. As the hours ticked by in my lonely room, my mind was spiraling into despair. At first, I thought I wasn't going to sleep because I had passed out after being rescued from the water. But I was plenty tired, only sleep would not come. I kept feeling the same things I felt that day over and over again. The fear when I knew George had been swept under the water, the guilt; knowing that he wasn't an overly strong swimmer to begin with and yet I had told him he would be fine, the awful nightmare that had felt just so real and the feelings I experienced in the dream. The helplessness, the grief... and finally the relief of seeing George alive and well, but then feeling crushed to the heart when John gave me the complete brush off.

"We're back where we started." I thought miserably. I had cried all I could cry once I had left to go back to my room only hours before and I was left feeling numb inside. I knew I wasn't going to fall asleep anytime soon, so I finally got out of bed and donned the same blue dress I had been in a little while ago. I just dragged a comb through my hair and headed out. I intended to go for a walk in the darkness and try to piece together my thoughts and emotions. The entire hotel was silent and it was somewhat comforting. The lobby was empty, except for a night manager who didn't seem to notice I was there. Taking a deep breath, I left the building. I didn't get very far though. As I began going down the property, someone caught my eye sitting on a large rock underneath a palm tree. I knew the silhouette of the person in the dim light and kept walking, trying to ignore my then pounding heart. Of course he had both cat like hearing and eyes because he spoke to me.

"And where do you think you're going at this hour?" I stopped in my tracks and swore under my breath.

"Why does it matter?" I found myself replying, in a bitter tone. I heard him stand and I forced myself to turn around. The moon was large enough that I could see him quite clearly then, being closer. He paused a moment; I dared not look at his face.

"You're right. What do I care? You wanna go out and get yourself killed, that's not my business." John responded in the same bitter tone. I blinked back hot tears.

"Well alright then." I muttered, turning to go again. As I did, he suddenly said

"Did you even think about what you were doing? Did you even think what would have happened to you?" I spun on my heels feeling angry.

"I thought you said you didn't care." I snapped.

"What you did was stupid, Ashley... I never thought you'd be that way." He ignored my retort. I turned my palms upward, adrenaline and emotion racing through every fiber of my body.

"You're right, John. I am stupid, I'm just a stupid girl who could have gotten herself killed. Got it. Anything else you'd like to make me feel like dirt about?" My voice oozed with sarcasm and anger. I knew I was playing with fire, but in that moment I couldn't have cared less.

"Hey, don't you talk like that to me!" He raised his voice. I didn't even flinch. I let out a sarcastic laugh.

"Oh, and what makes you think you can tell me what to do?" I pushed, pointing a threatening finger at him. He then grabbed my wrist. I pulled to get free, suddenly concerned about what he'd do.

"Stop it, Ashley...just stop it." He barked, fighting against me.

"Let go of me!" I cried, feeling tears burning in my eyes. What happened next, I never saw coming. I was pulled into a tight embrace.

"Promise me you'll never do anything like that again." John said, still not letting me go. By then I didn't mind. My anger was replaced by a strong urge to start crying again.

"I-I promise...I-I'm sorry." I stammered. I was surprised by the fact that John had instigated an embrace. Paul had been right of course, he did care for me. Of course he did, I knew that.

"Anybody would be angry over this if they thought they'd lose someone they cared a lot about." I reasoned as a few tears slid through my lashes. When he finally let me go, I stood there, trying not to let him see my tears.

"Are we good?" I asked, keeping my voice steady. I figured he'd get all flustered and say something silly, but he didn't. He gave me a half smile and nodded.

"We're good. I'm sorry I was so hard on you." I smiled too, feeling better.

"I'm sorry too. For what I said."

"Hey, you've got hot, stubborn blood like I do." He replied with a half shrug. For a moment, my heart froze, thinking somehow he'd said that because he knew we were related.

"Did Paul tell him?" I wondered in a slight panic.

"Guess that makes us alike." I pressed, still wondering. He laughed.

"Ashley, if we got any more alike, I'd have to say you really are my little sister." Okay, I was good. He didn't know.

"Well that's not such a bad thing." I replied.

"No, no it isn't. Speaking of which...you should be in bed." I couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but I was starting to feel really tired.

"Yeah...yeah, I should go. Thank you...for forgiving me I guess." I said, realizing how silly I sounded. John just gave me a look.

"Enough with the small talk, Miss Ashley. I'll be here in the morning." Was his answer. My dream then came back and I really wanted to tell him. I had told Paul and promised I'd tell him in my own time. Again, I didn't really know what brought me here, if it was real or just a wild fantasy my brain had cooked up, so ultimately I had no idea if telling John about who I was or even if I dared; what would happen to him would bring about anything...I didn't know how much time I had left either. the words were on the tip of my tongue as I looked at him, standing tall in the darkness.

"Yeah. Goodnight." I said instead.

"Goodnight, Ashley." Was his gentle reply and I headed back to my room.

 


	37. THIRTY SIX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Miami continued, Ashley accompanies the boys to an interview, and they learn what's next in store for them.

**THIRTY SIX**

 

**A/N: I am so sorry I haven't been updating this. It is done, just I'm slow as anything when it comes to updating. Hopefully I'll put up the rest of this story in short order. It is almost finished. Thank you for sticking around for those who have and I really appreciate your comments.  
**

 

Chapter Thirty Six:

 

I slept late the next day. No one came to wake me up, so I assumed nothing was going on. When I finally got up for the day, it was 11:00 in the morning. I had gotten to sleep the second I got back to my room the night before, I did feel better and no bad dreams plagued me for the rest of the night. It was another lovely sunny day when I looked out of the window, but I didn't feel overly keen on going back to the beach...I'm sure the others weren't too excited by the idea either. I showered that morning, pulling sand out of my hair and trying to get rid of the smell of seawater. When I finally got dressed for the day, it was close to noon, so I decided it was time to track the lads down and see what was what. I was hungry too, so I was hoping they had lunch plans. As I fastened the beautiful necklace from John around my neck, I was grateful I hadn't worn it when I was in the water the day before. After living through nearly drowning, I'm sure I would have lost it. I then left my room with my bag and disguise in it in case we went out, I ran right into Paul.

"Oh! Sorry." I chuckled, actually glad to see him.

"I was just about to come see if you had surfaced yet or not." He replied with a smile.

"Well, I have. I didn't mean to sleep so late..." I trailed off.

"Oh don't worry about it. We did too." Was his lighthearted answer.

"Long day for everyone yesterday, I guess." I lowered my voice.

"Well...yeah. I heard you had a talk with John last night." I blinked a few times. Had John really confided in Paul what took place between us the night before? I knew they were close, but I didn't think John would be the type to disclose anything and everything.

"How much do you know?" I asked, biting my lip. I still felt bad about getting angry, though it had all worked out for the best in the end.

"About a much as you, I assume. John came in pretty late last night and I was still up. He told me everything." So I guess I was wrong...

"Oh... was he okay?" I asked, wondering briefly if John was still mad at me.

"He was fine, just told me what happened and...how stubborn you can be. But I suppose that sort of thing runs in your family." Paul cracked a smile but I shushed him quickly and looked around.

"Don't talk about that out loud..." I warned.

"Why?"

"The walls have ears. I trust you to keep my secret, but you can be the only one who knows right now." I said, feeling bad though that I was putting such a responsibility on Paul.

"When are you going to tell him?" Paul asked after a few moments. I sighed.

"I don't know. I almost did last night after we reconciled... but I froze." I admitted.

"Well I'm not entirely sure what you're so afraid of. If he's your flesh and blood from your future, what would be the harm in telling him? The worst that would happen is when you finally did return to...your time, he'd have a long while to wait until he met you again." Paul must have been thinking about that a lot since I told him. And it all made sense, except for one small technicality that he could not know about. I felt my heart drop to my stomach. I longed to tell Paul what was to come... I knew by 1980, he and John led very separate lives and weren't overly close anymore but maybe if I told him...he'd remember and prevent it.

"But then what would happen?" I thought. I was reminded of my previous thoughts on the matter, that time had a way of making up for what was supposed to happen by causing another accident. John could still die even if that night in 1980 was prevented. He could fall ill, step out in front of traffic, overdose on God knows what... or have some other freak accident. I was nearly getting a panic attack just thinking about it.

"It just is... I don't know what I'll set off if I tell him." I concluded.

"Is this like the thing where if you step on a butterfly, then somehow the entire future is changed?" Paul joked.

"Something like that... I guess." I tried to see the humour in his statement. Paul seemed to drop the subject as the other three suddenly came down the hall toward us.

"Are we leaving or what? I wanna grab something to eat before we have to go to that interview." George piped up. Well he seemed perfectly fine despite what had happened the day before. I mean, I did too but I would have thought maybe George would have been shaken just a little.

"Yeah, we should go." Paul nodded.

"You guys have an interview today?" I asked, recalling the last interview they did, where I wasn't allowed in.

"Oh, we forgot to tell you. Yes, we have an interview today and then a meeting back here with Brian. You're welcome to come to both, we made sure and checked this time." Paul explained. I nodded.

"Sounds good." I agreed. So we headed out. John was quiet for the first time in...a while. I lagged behind the other three and made pace with John down the stairs.

"Hey." I greeted cheerfully.

"Hi." He answered simply.

"You okay?" He turned and gave me a faint smile.

"I'm fine...just slept funny." He admitted to me. I raised an eyebrow.

"So you have a sore neck?" I asked, unclear. He shook his head.

"No, no. I just... had the strangest dream." I loved that he was being so open with me, but I didn't want to push him. Still, I was curious about his dream.

"Do...you wanna tell me about it?" I asked slowly. He paused.

"I'm not sure if it would make a lot of sense. I was in New York City near that old Dakota building we were at a few days ago." He told me, absentmindedly. My heart froze. My step faltered as well, but I tried to keep calm.

"Oh? That's strange."

"Yeah and this man and woman were walking down near the building and I see this man run up to them and pull out a gun. So I'm trying to yell at them to run, while I try and tackle the gunman, but it was like my feet were glued to the ground." He explained, a look of puzzlement sweeping across his face. My heart was pounding in my ears. Why would John be having the same dream I had been having for weeks? He was dreaming about himself in the future and he didn't even know it. How did that happen?!

"D-Did you watch them both die then?" I dared ask.

"Just the man was shot. But he died." Was his answer. My mouth went dry.

"Did you see his face? Any faces?"

"No. They were all faceless like in a horror film." I allowed a little relief for that; at least he wasn't aware that it was his future. But I was still extremely confused as to why he would be having my recurring nightmare.

"Well, hopefully it's not a recurring thing. Dreams can be strange." I let out a lighthearted chuckle.

"Yeah, I'm sure it's nothing. Just kept me awake for a bit..." He trailed off.

"What are you two going on about back there?" Ringo asked as we reached the lobby.

"Oh nothing, just small talk." I fibbed with a smile as we caught up. The car was waiting for us outside, so we all piled in as I fixed my disguise into place.

"Hey, where'd Ashley go?" John joked, returning to his old self as if the conversation we had never happened. I smiled though, at his antics. The chatter picked up again as the car took off and I was active in the conversation, but my mind was elsewhere. One big question loomed large in my head in neon lights. How?

 

********************************

 

Try as I did, I could not get what John had told me out of my head. Most of me was in a panic, while the rest of me was still wracking my brain. It shouldn't have been possible that he would have had the same dream that had been plaguing me since I arrived here.

"Maybe we have some kind of mental link..." I thought. That was crazy! But then again, this entire situation was in essence, crazy. I had no answer even by the time we got to the building where the lads were to be interviewed. I tried to contribute to their conversation, but I was quiet, too busy trying to figure this out!

"Ashley, you've gotten quiet. Everything okay?" Paul was the first to notice, making pace with me into the building.

"I'm okay." I smiled.

"Just thinking." It wasn't exactly a lie.

"You do a lot of that, you know." He teased.

"Well... there's a lot to think about." I replied.

"Thinking about yesterday?" I had nearly forgotten! Funny, because I had nearly you know... died.

"No... no just personal stuff." I wasn't gonna talk about it obviously. While Paul knew the most, even he didn't know about the future... John's future. He paused before continuing.

"Well I was going to ask if you wanted to try our date again tonight, but if you're not up to it..."

"Oh no, no that sounds lovely. Of course I'm up to it." I pasted another smile on my face. He seemed glad to hear that.

"Oh good, it'll be nice to have some alone time." He smiled. I felt a little giddy for a moment before reality returned. It would be nice, maybe it would get my mind off the other.

"Hey slowpokes! We're on a schedule here!" John called from a few feet ahead of us in the lobby. I laughed lightly and broke into a jog with Paul on my heels.

"Relax, we're here." I answered in a lighthearted tone. I couldn't let John know I was in mental turmoil over what he'd told me; he'd never open up again to me. As promised, I was let past the lobby this time and was glad for that. My alias as the assistant Molly Jones was still holding strong, though it had become more of a show than an actual job. I didn't mind though, I really wasn't a fan of paperwork. We were ushered right in and I tried to focus on the moment at hand. Immediately, I saw television cameras armed and ready to go, so I knew I had to keep out of the way. That was just as well, as I said my mind was in a tizzy. The lads got right to work as I took a seat in a nearby chair out of the camera's view. They were chattering on to one another as I took out my journal. The only way I'd have any peace of mind with this was if I wrote it out. As the interview lady entered the room and sat down, John looked over at me and gave me a goofy wave and expression, I think just to let me know that they could see me. I laughed to myself and waved back before turning my attention to my writing.

_ The weirdest thing has come to pass. I wouldn't have thought it remotely possible, but then again this whole experience itself is impossible, so who am I to judge? What happened? Well john confided in me this morning that he had a strange dream last night, in which a man and a woman were outside the Dakota building in New York City and he watched as the man was shot to death. He was dreaming about his own death in the future. The same dream I have been having since I got here. So I'm completely losing my mind right now! Luckily, he has no idea who the man and woman are...he says they had no faces in his dream. What does this mean though? It shouldn't happen! I can't begin to figure this out and it scares me. It also makes me think I should come clean to him about me, about everything. If he's getting subtle hints through a dream... as insane as it sounds, then maybe there's a way to prevent it. I don't know, I'm just grasping at straws here, I really have no idea what to do. I could just forget about it, but who's to say it won't happen again to him and the next time he'll see that it's himself in the dream. I still have no idea how I would go about telling him when and if the right time came. It's not just saying 'I'm actually your granddaughter from the year 2015'. That would be so much easier, but it's the fact that I would have to explain that he isn't alive then because he gets murdered on December 8th, 1980 outside the Dakota building in New York City while returning home from the studio with his wife to see his son; my father. And who is to say that even if I did tell him about his death that it would work? Or he'd believe me? It's just all too much... _

I went on writing for a good forty minutes, about John, about the beach yesterday and how George and I both almost drowned, about my date tonight with Paul. I didn't realize the lads' interview was over until someone tapped me on the shoulder and I snapped my notebook closed. It was sweet George.

"Ready to go?" He asked me. I gave him a gentle smile.

"Sure thing." I replied, standing as the other three came over.

"How were we, Miss Ashley?" John smiled.

"Amazing as ever, you're all superstars." I replied, though I really hadn't been paying attention to the interview. I followed them out and knew our next stop was back to the hotel for a meeting with their manager. I did feel a little bit better having written down my feelings and worries, but I didn't even think about what I had done absentmindedly. I had left my notebook on the chair.

 

Third Person POV

John was the last to leave, but as he was about to, something caught his eye. It was the notebook Ashley was always writing in.

"She must have forgotten it." He thought, scooping it up.

"Hey, Ashley!" He called ahead as they all got outside. Ashley swivelled her head toward him and he handed her the book.

"You left this inside." He said. A look of panic swept over her face and he was puzzled.

"You didn't read it, did you?" She asked. John shook his head no and that seemed to relax her.

  
  


Ashley's POV

I couldn't believe I would be so stupid!

"He totally could have read anything out of that." I thought as I stuffed the book into my bag.

"He said he didn't though, so you're safe." I just wasn't ready.

 

***************************

 

When we got back to the hotel, I followed the lads to their suite where Brian Epstein was waiting.

"How did your interview go?" He asked them as I just entered and removed the dark wig from my head.

"Oh wonderful. I love answering the same handful of questions over and over." John replied, his voice oozing with sarcasm. I tried not to laugh. Mr. Epstein didn't touch that one and changed the subject instead.

"I hear George and Ms. Bunting nearly had an accident yesterday." I looked up. well of course he'd find out.

"It's fine, we're both fine." I piped up, trying to brush it off.

"Yeah, Ashley was trying to rescue me when I went under. But we're both okay." George added.

"So why did you want to meet with us?" Paul then spoke up, changing the subject once again.

"Well I figured you boys should be aware of where you're off to next, though I'm sure you all would love to stay in Miami." Mr. Epstein said.

"I thought we were going back to London." Ringo stated. I perked my ears. I wanted to know this too; it determined what would happen to me next after all.

"Not yet. I've arranged for a little holiday for a few weeks. There'll be a few things you will need to do as a band, but for the majority you'll have the time to yourselves." Was his reply.

"So where are we going?" George asked.

"Paris. France." My jaw nearly hit the floor. Paris?! In all my life, in all my travels with my parents I had never been to Paris; which was kind of funny given that it was so much closer than any of the other places I had been. Paul looked over at me and I must have just been goggle eyed.

"Is Ashley welcome to come?" He asked.

"Well, she's come this far with all of you, So I don't see why not." The lads were ecstatic.

"How's your French, Ashley?" Paul asked me with a wide grin.

_ "Je ne suis pas sûr. Pensez-vous que mon français est bien? _ " I replied, without missing a beat. John gave a low whistle.

"That's impressive, Miss Ashley. Where did you learn French like that?" He asked.

"From school." Was my smug answer. It was hilarious how awe struck the four of them became just by the one foreign sentence.

"Well I hope you got an A. What else can you say?" George asked.

"Depends. What would you like to hear?" I smiled.

"Say something dirty!" John piped up and they all laughed.

"Of course you'd say that." I rolled my eyes. Mr. Epstein stood.

"I'll leave you to your excitement. We leave tomorrow at 1pm sharp." He told us.

"We'll be ready." I assured him. The second he left, the four of them began hounding me again to speak more French.

"Fine, fine." I chuckled, searching my memory.

_ "J'ai voulu ce matin te rapporter des roses; Mais j'en avais tant pris dans mes ceintures closes Que les noeuds trop serrés n'ont pu les contenir. _

_ Les noeuds ont éclaté. Les roses envolées Dans le vent, à la mer s'en sont toutes allées. Elles ont suivi l'eau pour ne plus revenir. _

_ La vague en a paru rouge et comme enflammée. _

_ Ce soir, ma robe encore en est toute embaumée . . . _

_ Respires-en sur moi l'odorant souvenir." _ I recited. It was a poem I learned in school called the Roses of Saadi. It was very pretty, but I was pretty sure they had little to no idea of what I was saying.

"It's got something to do with roses..." Ringo guessed.

"It's a poem. The Roses of Saadi." I replied.

"So what did you say?" John asked. I chuckled.

"how are you guys gonna make it in Paris if you don't understand French?" I asked.

"We know French... well the words that count." George snickered. I knew what that meant.

"Tell us, Ashley. What does the poem say in English?" Paul asked.

"I wanted to bring you roses this morning; but I had closed so many in my sash that the knots were too tight to contain them.

The knots split. The roses blew away. All blew off to the sea, borne by the wind, Carried to the water, never to return.

The waves looked red as if inflamed.

Tonight, my dress is still perfumed.

Breathe in the fragrant memory." I translated

"That's beautiful." Paul mused.

"Yeah, I learned it in school, we had to recite it for a grade." I told truthfully. We all fell silent for a moment before like a chain reaction, the five of us grinned.

"We're going to Paris." I stated, almost in disbelief.

"We're going to Paris!" We all chorused in delight. I seemed to forget all about what happened earlier, it being replaced by genuine excitement. All of us were excited and rightly so. I knew in my heart that Paris would be amazing and I'd make wonderful memories there with the lads. What I didn't know...was that Paris would be my last adventure with them.

 


	38. THIRTY SEVEN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley and Paul finally get to go on their date but it doesn't end the way they hoped. Ashley has another harrowing close call with death and in a panic, the truth comes out. Now everyone knows and all the most special person in her life can key on is... she lied.

**THIRTY SEVEN**

 

**A/N: I feel like I should warn there is mention of drug use in this chapter. If this bothers you, just skip the italics. Thanks for reading.**

I was too busy to care about my worries after that. Almost right away, I took off for my own suite to begin packing for Paris France! I was over the moon ecstatic. I was going to be in the city of love with the four lads who lived off of songs they wrote about love... who could ask for better?

"Plus Paul is probably gonna have the time of his life with me in Paris." I thought fondly as I packed my bags and got organized. Before I knew it, it was well after 6pm and I was beginning to get hungry. Almost out of the blue, there was a knock on my door. I was sort of in a head space over Paris, so forgot who it was and what I was supposed to be doing that night.

"It's open." I sang, not paying too much attention until the voice called out.

"Ashley? Are you ready to go?" It was Paul. Suddenly I remembered.

"I-I'm just getting ready." I fibbed. Shoot! What kind of girlfriend was I supposed to be if I was forgetting our date all the time? Well the first time I was kind of almost drowning, but still... hurrying, I dug around in my bags for one of my nicer dresses, a light pink one I'd only worn a couple of times. Changing quickly, I regarded myself in the mirror before leaving the room and hastily tying my hair into a French braid.

"Is this okay?" I asked him, slightly flustered. I hoped he wouldn't notice I'd completely forgotten. He smiled though, seemingly unaware.

"You look lovely." Such a charmer.

"Thanks." I chuckled, feeling relieved. I went to go pick up my disguise wig, but he stopped me.

"I don't think you need that tonight." I gave him a look.

"But what if people see me with you? They'll want to know who I am." I replied. He shrugged.

"You're an old friend. They don't need to know any more. Everyone else believes that story so why won't strangers?" He made a good point.

"Alright then, let's go." I smiled, leading the way.

"I've already made dinner reservations, I hope you don't mind." Paul said, making pace with me.

"Oh I don't mind at all." I replied, just feeling lucky to be going on a date with Paul at long last.

"So what are you most excited for in Paris?" I asked him out of genuine curiosity.

"The girls." He joked. I pretended to look offended.

"Is that so?" He laughed. I loved his laugh.

"No, no. I guess I'm looking forward to the tourist spots. It's not every day I get to be a regular tourist. I can't remember the last time I ever went anywhere out of my own want without being recognized or chased." He sounded almost sad for a moment, but quickly changed his demeanor back to his happy go lucky self. I tried to keep the evening upbeat, so ignored that last part.

"I'm sure the Eiffel Tower will be magnificent to look at." I agreed.

"And climb." He nodded.

"You want to climb it?" I chuckled.

"Of course! You don't go to Paris and not climb the Eiffel Tower." Was his reply.

"Well you're a brave man." I teased as we reached the lobby. Outside, Paul hailed us a cab and we took off.

"So what is it you're looking forward to?" He then asked me.

"Honestly? Just Paris. Everything." I smiled. I was in a fantastic mood. I was off to Paris, I was going on my first date with Paul finally... it was going to be the perfect evening. Only it had a not so great end to it.

*************************

When we got to the restaurant, I was blown away. Of course I should have figured a Rock star like Paul would choose the classiest most expensive joint in town. I suddenly felt rather under dressed though. Paul was in a suit and tie, but these days he almost always was due to the mop top Beatle image. He must've noticed I felt a little out of place because he gave me a smile and said

"Don't worry, you look wonderful." Once inside, I tried to keep my awe to myself. I had never seen such a fancy restaurant, and I had seen some pretty ritzy ones in my time. We were seated by a waiter who I thought was much too peppy, but I was okay with it. He brought us a bottle of wine, but I just stuck to water after swearing off all alcohol. After looking over the menu for a few moments and nearly having a heart attack over the prices, I lowered the menu to see Paul was gazing intently at me. I tried not to blush.

"What?" I asked.

"You don't know how long I've waited to take you out somewhere, just the two of us." He said.

"Oh I know. And then things kept happening...like I almost drowned." I offered a half chuckle.

"Yes...how are you about all that? Does it keep you up nights?" He was serious.

"No...does it keep you up?" I countered, out of curiosity. He looked away for a moment.

"It only happened yesterday, Ashley. I'm surprised you're okay after what you went through out there." Was his answer. I just shrugged.

"I was saving George. I survived, that's all there is to it." It really didn't bother me, I wasn't sure why. Maybe because a small piece of me still believed this was all somehow a dream and you couldn't die in a dream, you'd just wake up, right?

"I have to say, Ashley. I was scared. I was terrified. I didn't know what would happen to you...if you..." He trailed off. I reached across the table and took his hand.

"I'm fine. You don't need to worry over me. Yes it was scary, but I made it. We both made it. It's best to focus on the good side of that story." I said, feeling bad at how upset this clearly made him. He was silent a moment.

"I guess it just drove home the point to me that you won't be here forever." Ah.

"Yes...but that doesn't mean I'm not here right now. Let's focus on the now. Right now, I'm not going anywhere." At that, he seemed to cheer up.

"You're right. I'm just being silly." He brushed it off.

"No you're not. Your feelings are valid, of course. But there's no reason to worry." Dinner was wonderful. After our little heart to heart, Paul and I just enjoyed a nice evening together. We talked more about Paris, about our travels together... it was really nice. I hadn't felt that relaxed in quite a long time. As we were about to leave though, things drastically changed.

"So if you're John's granddaughter from the future, who is your friend Sienna? Is she one of us too?" My heart froze.

"Um..." I stammered. He'd caught me completely off guard.

"I don't know if I should say..." I trailed off.

"So she is?" Paul asked. I shook my head.

"You know too much already." I decided.

"I guess that makes sense. I wish I could know more though. I feel like there's so much about you I don't know." He answered as we began walking down the street.

"Well what do you want to know?" I asked. He shrugged.

"Basic things. Where you grew up, what your life was like as a child with John as your grandfather. I'm sure you have loads of those stories." My heart sank.

"Um... yeah." I said in a weak, not too convincing voice.

"You do have those kinds of stories, don't you?" He pressed. I looked for a way out of this conversation.

"Just tell him! Warn him!" My mind told me.

"No. Too dangerous." I thought.

"Oh look, there's a cab parked across the street. Let's go." I said in a high tone. A good indicator I was stressing out. I stepped into the street, unaware of the car approaching. Everything happened so fast after that.

**"Ashley, look out!** " Paul's voice rang out a half second too late. I spun around to face the oncoming car slamming on its brakes, but it was too late. I felt the car hit me but felt no pain as my body fell to the ground and everything went black.

_ I woke up to a ringing in my ears. I was on the floor and slowly picked myself up. in front of me was a typical 1970's living room. It was nighttime and children's toys were scattered on the floor. Confused, I tried to walk closer but something stopped me. It was like I was trapped in a glass bubble, only able to watch. _

_ "Where am I?" I thought. Just then, I saw a man enter the room. I knew him. _

_ "John!" I called his name, but he didn't hear me. A cigarette dangling from his mouth as he sat and drew a needle. I caught my breath in the back of my throat. I knew what that was, it was Heroin. _

_ "No! No, stop doing that!" I pleaded, though I knew he couldn't hear me. I felt the hotmk tears in my eyes. I knew he had a heroin addiction, but I guess I never really thought about it. And then I saw a small dark head poke around the corner. Tears spilled through my lashes. It was my father. I knew what he'd just seen. John noticed his son was there almost right away. _

_ "Go back to bed." He barked at his son and my dad took off running. I touched my hand to the glass, feeling heartbroken. If my father had seen his dad shooting up like that... that would stay with you. _

_ "Maybe that's why dad never revealed the truth." I thought. Maybe all dad knew him as was a drug abuser. It didn't matter if John was the best dad in the world to him before that fatal night, all my father would remember is that moment. _

_ "Oh my God..." I whispered tearfully. Suddenly, the floor dropped out from underneath me and I fell. I started screaming until I landed on something hard. Scrambling to my feet, I knew where I was. It was happening again. _

_ "No, no, no! wake up!" I begged myself. I couldn't do this again. I saw the same scene play out and ran. If I couldn't save John by yelling to get out of the way, I'd just take the bullet. I saw the gunman step out of the shadows. _

_ "No!" I yelled, throwing myself in front of the both of them. _

_ "You can't die, it's a dream. You can't die, it's a dream..." I repeated to myself as the gunshots rang out. I fell to the ground as blood pooled in my chest. _

_ "Oh my God!" I heard John yell before he was above me. _

_ "Call an ambulance!" He yelled to his wife. _

_ "You can't die, it's a dream..." _

_ "J-John..." I struggled to get out. _

_ "You know who I am..." He replied, before realizing how silly it sounded. _

_ "I-I tried to warn you..." I stammered, starting to shake. I was dying. _

_ "Shh, don't talk, save your strength." He told me. He had no idea who I was. I started feeling very cold and knew I was going to die. _

_ "You can't, it's not real!" My mind screamed. _

_ "You're going to be okay." I heard him say. _

_ "I did it..." I whispered, realizing just what I'd done. I'd finally beat my nightmare. I had won. _

_ "What did you do?" John asked. _

_ "I saved you..." My eyes slid closed and I accepted death. _

__

***********************

_ "She's beautiful." _

_ "Have you decided on a name for your little one, Mr. Lennon?" _

_ "We should do this now." _

_ "Ashley. Her name is Ashley Julia." _

_ "Ashley Julia Lennon. It has a lovely ring." _

_ "No. No her last name is Bunting... Ashley Julia Bunting. She won't ever have that other name. Ever." _

 

_ "You lied to me. You-you and mother lied to me!" _

_ "What did he tell you?" _

_ "The truth." _

_ "What's going on down here?" _

_ "You both have been lying to my face since I came into the world. What harm would it have done to know the truth?!" _

_ "She found out. HE told her. _

_ "He only knew who I was because you got out of the car." _

_ "We're sorry honey." _

_ "How could you do this to me?" _

_ "We were trying to protect you." _

_ "But why? Sienna knows who she is and she's fine! Why should I be any different?" _

_ "Ashley, there's differences. We didn't want you to be followed around by people just because of your name. We wanted our own life, own path not made for us by predecessors." _

_ "That still doesn't justify it. I don't care if I had millions of people following me around. I still should have known! Haven't you always told me that family is the most important?" _

_ "Yes, but this is different. Your father was angry for many years after his father died. Felt it was his own fault." _

_ "He got shot, point blank by a crazy man. How was that his fault?" _

_ "That doesn't matter Ashley. We have our reasons for not telling you. But now you know. Let's just leave it at that." _

_ "So basically you guys chose to not tell me the biggest secret of my life because dad had his own daddy issues?" _

_ "Well..." _

_ "Well that's selfishness if I ever heard of it." _

_ "Ashley, now that's not..." _

_ "Save it. Nothing you can say can make this better. You lied to me for basically nothing. And I'm never going to forget this. Sienna shouldn't have been the one to introduce me to the music and the era you held back from me. I just can't believe you lied." _

 

_ "...Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?" _

 

_ "You really are like my little sister. We argue, we tease, we tear strips off of one another, but at the end of the day I'd kill a man to protect you." _

 

_...He then grabbed my wrist. I pulled to get free, suddenly concerned about what he'd do. _

_ "Stop it, Ashley...just stop it." He said, fighting against me. _

_ "Let go of me!" I cried, feeling tears burning in my eyes. What happened next, I never saw coming. I was pulled into a tight embrace. _

_ "Promise me you'll never do anything like that again." John said, still not letting me go. _

_ "I-I promise...I-I'm sorry." _

_ "Enough with the small talk, Miss Ashley. I'll be here in the morning." _

 

_ "....I'm here. I'll always be here." _

__

I heard muffled voices talking at speeds that were much too fast. They sounded like they were underwater.

"We have to call her parents..." Someone said.

"No we don't she's fine..."

" **Paul, for Christ's sake, she's just been hit by a car! By all accounts she should be in the hospital right now!"** That was definitely John.

"What happened?" I tried to say, but nothing came out of my mouth.

"I didn't want to cause a scene, she's not bleeding or anything..." Paul was stressed out.

"Paul, be reasonable, just call her parents and let them know what happened."

"I-I can't do that..."

"And why the hell not?"

"She...doesn't have parents. At least not here and now..." Light tickled my eyelids and I knew I had to open my eyes. My body wouldn't respond to the command.

"Wake up!" I ordered myself. The voices continued. I remembered being at the restaurant, having a lovely time with Paul...there was a car...

"Am I dead?" I wondered.

"You can't die, it's a dream." The chant rang through my head again. Finally, after what seemed like eons, my eyes flew open and I sat up quick. I was back in my suite at the hotel. My entire body ached and the first person I saw was John. Suddenly, the entire memory trip I'd gone on while unconscious came back and I wanted to hold him and never let go. He didn't notice I was awake until he turned away from the window and saw me. His eyes widened.

"Ashley, thank God!" He exclaimed, rushing to my side.

"What's the big idea? Miss me that much?" I offered a light joke. He grabbed me in a bear hug though, so I knew he wasn't kidding around. I wanted to cry all of a sudden. I loved that he was hugging me now, but I knew I'd once again scared the living hell out of him. I pressed my lips together hard to keep from crying.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, losing the battle against my tears. And then I recalled something else. The lads had been talking before I came around. It was barely discernible, but I remembered a good chunk of it. My heart skipped a few beats.

"Was that a dream too? Or did Paul just tell everyone my secret?" I thought as John finally let me go. As he did, I quickly brushed my tears away.

"Am-am I okay?" I ventured. John nodded inaudibly.

"Paul refused to take you to the hospital. I was going to myself until George showed up with the hotel doctor. He said you were fine. Just that your head would probably hurt for a few days." He explained. I let out a sigh.

"What is it with me since we got to Miami? First I almost drown, then I get hit by a car..." I said aloud, half to myself.

"Maybe you're just accident prone." John cracked a half smile.

"Which is totally weird, because back home, it's my best friend who's the klutz." I let out a light laugh before I remembered who I was talking to.

"Um...anyway...I'm okay, so that's good I guess." I tacked on, a little awkwardly. John stood, seemingly musing to himself.

"You know we wanted to call your parents too, the three of us figured they should know what happened tonight. Paul told us something strange though. I know it can't be true though because he was probably in shock." John's voice sounded weird and the panic returned.

"Well, what did he say?" I asked innocently, trying to stay calm.

"He said that you don't have parents here. That you arrived in London two months ago out of the blue and claimed to be from the year 2015. Is that crazy, or what?" His strange tone remained and I didn't know if he was angry or not.

"Say something! Say Paul is crazy, that he was mad with worry over me he started making up stories." I thought. But my mouth disobeyed.

"It's...true." I said. John faced me, his face indecipherable.

"You must have hit your head pretty hard, Ashley. It's the only explanation." His voice was bitter and I knew I was on thin ice.

"I-I'm sorry, John. I guess I should have been truthful from the beginning, but it's true...I did arrive here in December from my time. I'm from 2015. I live in London, I'm a student, I'm graduating this year. I don't know how I ended up back here...or why, but it's true." I rambled, trying to get him to at least smile or accept what I was telling him. But with John, I knew he'd get hung up on one thing. I had lied to him.

"And I'm mad at my parents for lying to me for seventeen years. I've been lying to John; not to mention George and Ringo for weeks. Talk about hypocrisy." I thought, standing from my bed. My head hurt a bit, but I couldn't focus on that. John was scarily silent and my heart was racing.

"You lied to me." He finally spoke. My heart dropped.

"I did. I'm sorry." I owned up to it.

"Look on the bright side. At least he doesn't know who you really are..." I thought. That didn't make me feel better.

"So Paul just decided to walk a complete stranger into our lives. Nice. You know, I was right about you from the beginning, Ashley Bunting. I should have trusted my gut instinct when it told me you were no good." He snapped. I caught my breath in the back of my throat. Had he really thought that?

"John wait..." I pleaded as he made ready to stalk out.

"No Ashley. I have nothing to say to you. You can just go back to wherever the devil you came from, for all I care." He replied in an ice cold tone, before pushing past me and leaving the room. Tears welled in my eyes as I heard the suite door slam closed.

"What have I done?" I whispered as the tears fell.


	39. THIRTY EIGHT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley's life is turned upside down once everyone knows most of the truth of who she is. John is furious at her and wants nothing to do with her, Paul is a little mad as well for his own reasons and Ashley is falling to pieces. Her only hope is to tell John everything. She pens a letter and in an anger induced, emotional row, she throws it at him. She has no idea what to do now. Everything she feels, is ruined.

**THIRTY EIGHT**

 

I was angry. I was angry that Paul had told them.

"Would the outcome have been any different though if you told him yourself, in your own time?" I thought. I should have known John would react the way he did. I was just being stupid keeping the truth to myself.

"So what if he knew I was his granddaughter from the future, from the beginning?" I thought, pacing my room, crying.

"I had my reasons." I said aloud. Everything was just so messed up now. It wasn't as if my memory trip had already got me emotionally charged, but now John was angry with me. He wanted nothing to do with me. He said that he initially had thought ill of me... and he should have trusted his judgement.

"We came so far." I wept. Moments later, there was a loud knock at my suite door. Still crying, because I didn't give a damn what I looked like, I threw the door open to reveal Paul.

"I heard you were awake...Ashley, what's the matter?" His relaxed face instantly turned to worry. I pressed my lips together.

"You...you ruined everything." I bitterly accused, leaving the door open and marching over to the couch.

"By telling them." Paul knew what I was talking about right away.

"Now John hates me for lying to him." I cried burying my face in my hands.

"He'll get over." Was Paul's gentle reply. My head shot up.

"No he won't, Paul! I'd be furious if roles were reversed! He has every right to be angry and hate me and say he wants nothing more to do with me..." I trailed off, taking a shaky breath.

"You shouldn't have told them. Especially him." My voice shook. Paul didn't speak for several minutes and for a second, I wondered if he had left.

"Get some sleep. Our flight leaves tomorrow." He finally said before then he left. I started crying once again. Now two of them were angry at me.

"What the hell are you doing, Ashley?" This was suddenly feeling like a _nightmare._

 

**************************************

 

The hype we'd all had about going to Paris had fizzled out completely by the time we all piled into the car the next day, for the airport. No one spoke, or barely looked at one another. I couldn't bring myself to look at either Paul or John, reverting to staring blankly out the window. I wasn't sure if George and/or Ringo were mad at me for lying too, but I didn't want to find out. It was eerily silent the entire way to the airport and even all the way till we got onto the plane. I plunked myself down in a window seat alone with my head bowed so my hair would cover my face. I was miserable and didn't care who knew it. After a while, I felt someone sit next to me.

"Hey." A soft voice greeted me. I looked up with misty eyes to see George.

"Hi." I whispered. Next thing I knew, George was wrapping his arms around me and hugging me tight. I reciprocated as tears spilled through my lashes.

"If it's any consolation, you being from the future doesn't sound that out there to me. I believe you." He told me in a soft voice. I gave him a small smile.

"Thank you, George. You don't know what that means to me." I whispered.

"You're welcome. I don't see any reason to get mad over it, you probably had your reasons for staying hidden. I'm sure things will be back to normal in no time." He assured me. George was such a sweetie, as always, but I didn't think it would be smoothed over that easy. We fell quiet again as the plane made ready to take off. it was going to be a long flight.

 

***********************

 

Well it was that, a long flight. Luckily though, the four lads all dropped off to sleep not long after takeoff. I couldn't help but wonder if they had lost sleep the night before over...me. I was a wreck. My entire purpose for being here; or the reason I at least had thought I was here for was falling through my fingertips. After months of getting on John's warm side, having him open up to me the way he had, it all had been ruined by the truth. I wondered if he'd even believe me if I told him the rest. I didn't even know if he believed what he did know, now.

"What do I even do now?" I thought many a time over the course of that flight.

 _"You lied to me._.." His voice echoed in my head; it's bitter tone. It was parallel to my own experience with mum and dad...

 _"You lied to me...y-you and mother both lied to me!"_ My own voice echoed in my head. I understood his reaction, it was my own.

"Further proof we're related." I thought, only half sarcastic. I understood John's reaction, sure. But it didn't tell me how to resolve the issue because my own issue was still unresolved. If I ended up back home right that moment, I'd be in the same shoes as John. Angry at being lied to by the people/person you loved and cared so deeply about. By the person you trusted. Tears were my companion for most of the flight. Silent, as I didn't wish to wake anyone with my crying, but I was heartbroken. Paul was mad too. He just didn't understand the entire picture. He kept thinking and telling me to tell John the entire story. But he didn't understand why I just...I couldn't. he was justified in his anger towards me too though, because I knew I'd placed such a huge secret on his shoulders from day one. It was my fault, and yet I was pointing and blaming him.

"Ashley, you idiot!" I lamented to myself. I had to fix this. I had to fix everything. The only way to do that was through the truth...no matter how painful. Taking out my notebook and pen finally, I poured my heart out onto the pages.

_"I'm off to Paris, France with the lads now. Initially, we were all over the moon excited. But the excitement was sadly short lived after an accident happened. I was out to dinner with Paul, our first official date and afterward, I stepped out into traffic. Why? I was distracted by what Paul wanted to know about me, about my future. And John. I panicked and stepped off the curb and a car hit me. I'm fine, but Paul in his stress confessed to the other three that I'm from the future. The others were wanting to notify my parents of what happened, and Paul told them the wasn't possible because I'm from the year 2015. John got angry with me. He's furious that I lied to him. Thank God he doesn't know the whole story yet, but I'm going to have to tell. It's the only way this can be resolved...I hope. I mean, there's no guarantee he'll believe the rest... or even if he believes what has already come out. Paul's mad now too because I blamed him for telling the secret I dumped on him the day we met. Everything is just my fault. I don't want to tell the whole truth, about how I'm John's granddaughter and we've never met in my timeline because he dies in seventeen years... I've been through this before. If I tell him about December 8th, who's to say it'll even work? For all I know, I've just effectively ruined my relationship with him for good..."_

I wrote for a good hour. Some spots were slightly smudged from tears dribbling onto the pages, but I kept going. In my emotional turmoil, I turned the page and began writing out a heartfelt letter. The words had never come to me before in the right way and I knew this was probably a mistake, but if all else failed, I'd give John the letter explaining everything and warning him of what was to come. I knew it was a futile attempt, but I had to.

 

**_Dear John,_ **

**_You know most of the truth now, and I understand completely if you never wish to speak to me again. I'm very sorry for keeping the truth from you and George and Ringo since I arrived, but I was scared. What you now know is only a piece of the story. Paul didn't pick up just a complete stranger off the street, I have more of a connection to both of you than you realize. Paul didn't know this at the time I met him, but while I am from the year 2015, the rest of that statement is this. I'm your granddaughter. Now, you can choose to believe it or not, along with the rest I've told you, but there's no way I can prove either. I only wish I could. Ever since coming into your lives, my sole purpose was to get to you. To get to know you and maybe form some sort of lasting relationship with you. Because...in my future, I don't know you. I've never known you personally, only trough your music and legacy. My parents refused to give me your surname and hid the fact I was your granddaughter until just before I arrived here. My father; your son, was bitter at you over something many years ago and it caused him to take drastic measures. But that's why I don't know you in my time. I never met you before...because you're dead. In my time, you've been dead since December 8th, 1980 when a gunman outside of your future home at the Dakota building in New York City decided to open fire on you. You were shot four times and died before anything could've been done to save your life. My father would have been abut 5 years old. I don't know if this helps prove myself to you, or even if you'll heed the warning, but I've got to try. I love you, John. You may not know it, or try to deny it, but I love you with all my soul. I always have, even before I knew the truth about my heritage. And now that I met you in your time and have gotten to know you and see the man behind the smile, I love you even more. I hope, if you ever decide to forgive me, that I can maybe see you one day when I finally return to where I belong in history. It's my only wish._ **

**_Yours always,_ **

**_Ashley Julia Lennon."_ **

 

It was the first time I'd written my real name and I got a chill as I signed the letter. I tore the page out and folded it up before sticking it in my pocket. I'd get an envelope at the hotel, and hopefully then deliver it to him. I took a shaky breath and looked out the window. All I saw was clouds, and it wasn't overly interesting. All of a sudden, I heard movement and turned to see Paul sitting in the chair next to me that George had vacated. I bit my lip and turned away.

"What is it?" I asked in a low voice.

"I want to apologize." Was his gentle reply. I turned back to face him.

"Why are you apologizing? I should be. I blamed you for what was my own fault." I lamented.

"Still, I shouldn't have told. You're right." He said. I blinked back more tears.

"I'm sorry." I whispered. Paul hugged me.

"I'm sorry too. And I'm really glad you're okay." He gave me a smile. My heart felt a little lighter, but one big weight was still hanging around my neck. Paul looked over me toward the window.

"Ashley, look." He told me and I turned my head. Rising into the sky, all lit up in its nighttime glory was the Eiffel Tower. A small smile tugged at my lips.

"We're here."

 

*******************************

 

Sunlight tickled my eyelids and I didn't want to move. We'd gotten into Paris late, and had been shown directly to our hotel. I crashed right away into a dreamless (thank heaven) slumber. It wasn't until I woke up that I remembered, first of all, where I was...and then the crushing reality when I realized what was wrong still. I had slept in my clothes, so immediately, I reached into my pocket for the letter I'd penned to John on the plane. Exiting my bedroom to the rest of my suite, I rummaged around the desk until I found a hotel envelope. Sticking the papers inside, I closed the envelope and wrote John's name on it. As I changed my clothes, I tried to summon enough courage to face him and give him the letter. In the back of my mind, I wondered if he'd just tear it up. My blood ran cold at that. I was second guessing myself all the way down the hall. I knew what room they were, I'd stopped there the night before as Paul took me to my room. Hesitating, I finally knocked on the door. George opened it, so I stuck the letter back into my pocket.

"Hi George." I smiled.

"Morning, Ashley. Come in." He replied, opening the door wider. I did so and Ringo was on the cough drinking coffee.

"Ashley. Good morning." He smiled. So he wasn't mad either.

"Morning, Ringo. Everyone sleep okay?" I asked, relaxing a little.

"Oh I think so. Travel wears us all out." George replied. Ringo looked up at me before standing.

"Listen, Ashley. I just wanna say I'm okay with...well what happened. What Paul told us about you." I nodded silently.

"So you believe me?" I asked.

"I do. I don't know why or how it's possible, but I figure I've gotten to know you so much that anything you say must be true." That relaxed me even more.

"Thanks, Ringo. You too, George. I was afraid you two might take John's point of view... though you'd have every right to..." I trailed off.

"Yeah well, John can overreact sometimes." Ringo shrugged. That made me wonder. Had I overreacted in my own situation? Should I have given mother and dad a chance to explain their reasons before I got upset?

"I suppose." Was my soft answer as I sank into the couch. As I did, Paul came out and saw me.

"Ashley, I was just going to see if you were up." He smiled, coming to give me a kiss. I didn't think anything of it until I remembered we'd never formally told the others about us. George and Ringo didn't seem phased though. Once Paul realized, he got a little flustered.

"We gathered, don't worry about it." Ringo smiled. I let out a light laugh.

"We aren't subtle, is that what you mean?" I joked.

"Not entirely." George replied. For a moment I wondered if he'd be okay with this, given our history, however brief. But he seemed totally fine, so I didn't bother asking. I was starting to loosen up even more as the four of us started talking about what we wanted to do that day when John came into the room. One look told me he hadn't slept a wink though I'm sure he tried on the plane. My heart skipped a beat as I wondered if he had heard me crying. The letter in my pocket suddenly felt like a lead ball. We made eye contact. He looked away first.

"Maybe we should give you two some space..." Paul started to suggest.

"No, don't you guys leave. I have nothing to say to her you all can't hear." John's tone was harsh and I wanted the floor to swallow me up.

"John, don't be hurtful to her. She's been through enough." Paul warned. Silence fell between the five of us and you could cut the tension with a knife, it was so thick.

"Why are you still here?" The question came at me like an arrow to the heart.

"I-I don't follow..." I stammered.

"Why don't you just go back where you came from? You've done enough here." Tears welled in my already sore eyes.

"I-I don't know how..." My lip began to tremble.

"John, stop it. You're upsetting her." Paul stepped in again.

"Good! She should be upset, coming into our lives and lying to us all. Is that all you wanted? To get a free ride with us?" He shot.

"No..." Was my weak answer. I searched my mind for words. I couldn't just stand there like a child getting yelled at.

"Well then why the hell are you here?!" His patience was wearing thin. Jamming my hand into my pocket, I dug out the letter and thrust it at him.

"There. It's all in there." I said in a loud voice. It shook with emotion, but I didn't care. John looked dazed for a few moments as he took the letter. I didn't bother to hang around after that.

"Now if you're done treating me like a _**goddamn** _child, I'll be going!" I yelled, spinning on my heel and marching out of the room. Once I got back to my suite, I nearly collapse. I'd done it. I'd just given him the final piece of the puzzle. It was up to him what he would do next, I just couldn't bear to hang around and find out the outcome. Donning my coat, wig and sunglasses, I made my way down to the lobby and left the hotel all on my own. I knew I was supposed to, but I couldn't have cared less. In my sunglasses, no one could tell I was crying as I let my feet take me anywhere but there.

 


	40. THIRTY NINE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley still struggles with everything and everyone else feels the rift as well.  
> An opportunity comes up for them all to attend a french ball and though her heart isn't in it, Ashley agrees to go. Meanwhile, John reads the letter from Ashley and it all becomes too real.

**THIRTY NINE**

 

I finally stopped shaking as I entered a small French café not far from the hotel. The warmth of the café was inviting after walking in the brisk February weather. I already missed the heat of Miami, even if most of the other things that occurred there weren't great.

" _Bonjour mademoiselle, Qu'est ce que je peux vous server?_ " The man behind the counter asked me. I understood him entirely. I tried not to recall how jazzed John was over the fact that I could speak French only days ago.

" _Juste un café, s'il vous plaît. Noir_." I replied. I sat as I waited for someone to bring it to me and looked out the window. People were milling to and fro as if they had no care in the world. It was hard to stay calm. A million what ifs began swirling through my head. What if John ripped up the letter? What if he read it and thought I was off my head crazy? I started feeling quite panicky again as my coffee was brought to me. I sipped it absentmindedly and took a few deep breaths. The most prominent thing in my mind was the very plausible possibility that John would still never get over the fact that I had lied. It made me re-examine my own situation and how much of a hypocrite I still felt like.

"Cheer up, for God's sake. You're in Paris!" I tried to remind myself. But what good was Paris when you were miserable?

" _There. It's all in there..._ " My voice rang out in my mind as I saw myself handing him my letter.

" **No**!" I heard myself scream just like I did in my nightmares about him. I heard the gunshots echo in my mind and slammed my coffee down on the table, causing it to spill a little. I shut my eyes, trying to ignore the people now staring. Instinctively, I reached to my neck where my locket still hung. I had never taken it off the night before. It seemed like years ago that John had given it to me, as part of their little Valentine's Day thing with me and it was only a few days prior. It still had no photo in it, but that was fine, because its significance held higher value. Only sitting there, it made me feel worse. After John had given it to me, we'd had a really meaningful conversation. He called me his little sister. I left soon after. I didn't want to start crying again in the middle of the café. I didn't want to go back to the hotel at all. I thought about it and all I saw was John's stone like face and how his words cut through me.

"He thinks you're dirt now... like you've just been hanging around out of your own selfishness. He thinks you're a stranger and a terrible person." I thought as I decided to go back anyway. What choice did I have? I'd get lost out here on my own and then God knows what would happen? Besides, I was sure Paul had already gotten the entire police force of Paris looking for me and I'd only been gone for about an hour. I intended to hang out in the lobby for a few more hours to avoid running into anybody, my suite was too easy of a target. In my disguise, even the lads would have to look twice. I was afraid. Afraid of what John would do with my letter, afraid of what would happen between us, afraid if he did read it he'd tell the others and they'd all think I lost my mind. Some of my worries were downright foolish, but oh well. When I got back to the hotel, my heart began to race and my hands felt clammy.

"Don't you dare have a panic attack right now." I ordered myself as I stepped through the doors. As I was trying to keep my nerves at bay, an ache blossomed in the back of my head. I knew it was from getting hit the night before. By all accounts I probably should have stayed in bed that day, but there was too much else going on in my mind. I quickly scanned the lobby and once I was convinced that no mop tops were in sight, I sat in one of the plush chairs against the wall and picked up a magazine to pass some time. It was mostly to hide my face as I tried to calm down, but I did read a few articles. I just needed to keep distracted from the inevitable. I knew I couldn't avoid the boys, namely John, forever. He'd find me one way or the other just to tear a strip off of me. I felt entirely helpless when he was barking at me earlier. Normally, I would have stood my ground like I'd done in the old days, but those were petty arguments. This was different... and I wasn't innocent. Several minutes passed and I was beginning to relax when suddenly I heard familiar voices.

"She couldn't have gone far, Paul. She's careful like that." I heard George.

"But she's just a girl, and she's by herself out in the big city. God knows what kind of trouble she might be in." Paul was worried again.

"I'm sure she can take care of herself..." I heard Ringo add. Carefully peering over top of my magazine, I decided I would reveal myself, just so Paul wouldn't call in the forces. I didn't see John in sight, which wasn't entirely reassuring, but I mustered up as much courage and composure as I could. I lowered the magazine and whistled through my teeth, grabbing their attention right away.

"See? I told you she wouldn't go far." George smiled as the three made their way over to me.

"Ashley, have you been here the entire time?" Paul asked, grabbing me in a hug. He worried way too much about me, but given the circumstances, I guess he was allowed.

"No, I went for a walk." I answered simply.

"We didn't know you'd left until only minutes ago when you didn't answer your door." Ringo said. I bit my lip.

"Yeah...I uh, needed some alone time." I confessed.

"Understandable. It's been a rough morning so far." George smiled, sympathetically.

"Yeah...how about we go out for a while? Take a load off." Ringo suggested.

"Sure, I'm up for it. Paul? Ashley?" George asked. I looked away.

"Will um...John be joining us?" His name hurt for me to say.

"I wouldn't say so, no. He's been locked in his room for the past hour." Paul told me, giving me a sideways glance. I took a deep breath and forced a smile onto my face.

"Well then he's missing out. Let's go." I agreed. George and Ringo ran on ahead as Paul held me back.

"What was in that letter, Ashley?" He asked me right out. I looked him in the eye.

"The truth."

 

***********************************

 

The four of us had a good time, we went out for a bite to eat (I was barely hungry), shopped around a little and even walked past the Eiffel Tower. The three lads kept the atmosphere light and stress free for my sake, but I knew they had questions. Especially George and Ringo. But I was in no mood for that kind of talk. For a brief while, I was distracted from my problems which was a blessing. Before we knew it, it was nearly dinnertime, so the lads decided we should head back. I didn't want to, but I didn't say so. As we got back, I planned on locking myself in my room and ordering room service. I didn't feel up for an awkward evening with the four as ¾ tried to ignore the elephant in the room between John and I. No one even batted an eye or tried to coerce me into joining them for the evening. They merely bid me goodnight and let me go. So I did just what I wanted to do. Ordered room service and sat with my notebook. I had a lot I wanted to write down. I wrote about my fears regarding the letter, my fears regarding my relationship with John and whether he'd ever forgive me or not. I wrote about Paris and all it's glory that I'd seen so far. And then I got onto writing about my life. My parents, my home. Something about the familiarity of those memories was soothing. Even my fight with mum and dad. I saw it in a whole other light now, being on the other end of a similar occurrence. I wished more than anything that I could have hugged my dad right at that moment and told him I was sorry. I wanted to ask if he'd like to talk about what made him so bitter. Flashes of that dream featuring John's future drug addiction flickered in my mind as I wrote. I had no idea if that was the reason behind dad's actions, but if it was, I understood. I only wish he'd dealt with it differently. Drastic actions seemed to be a family trait. Right up there with stubbornness and pride. I didn't realize hours had passed until my hand started cramping up and I'd written several pages. It was getting pretty late and I knew I should probably turn in shortly, though I knew sleep would most likely not come easy. As I got up from my chair and put my notebook away, the pain in my head returned. Thinking quick, I took two Aspirin I had in my bag. The aspirin was probably long overdue. Just as I was about to go into my room, there was a knock at my door. Anxiety levels rose as I walked to the door and looked through the peephole. Relieved, I opened the door to Paul.

"Hey. How are you feeling?" He asked me. I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"Okay I guess. I was just going to turn in." I replied, softly.

"Alright, well I won't keep you then. I just wanted to tell you that we have something fun happening tomorrow night." A smile tugged at his lips.

"Oh really? A show?" I asked. He shook his head.

"Better. A ball." He revealed.

"A ball? Like fancy dresses and tuxedos?" I asked, starting to feel a little excited.

"That would be the one. It's some sort of social function. Anyway, I thought you'd be happy to know that. I'll take you dress shopping tomorrow." He smiled.

"Dress shopping? Paul, you really don't have to..." I trailed off.

"Nonsense. It's the least I can do. You haven't exactly had a good couple of days." His smile faded.

"Tell me about it..." I murmured. Next thing I knew, Paul was hugging me.

"You've got to stop scaring me, Ashley. The incident on the train, the beach, the car... it's like something is purposely trying to take you away from me." His dark eyes were sad. I bit the inside of my cheek, attempting to maintain my composure.

"I know...it's been rough lately, but I'm really, really hoping to turn a new leaf here..." I admitted.

"Good. And I hope things do get better...you know, with you and John. I think you should know he still hasn't come out of his room. For a while, we wondered if he'd maybe gone out the window or something, but it's way too high up. Whatever you said in that letter must've really got to him." Paul told me. I tried not to freak out and just nodded.

"Yeah...I should um...I should get some sleep." I stammered. I couldn't have this conversation right now. He understood and bid me goodnight. As I closed and locked the door, I was overcome by a flurry of emotion. Excitement for the ball, guilt over causing poor Paul so much grief with all my accidents as of late, and heartache over the latter. I was right, sleep would not come easy that night. I tried to distract myself with thoughts of an elegant ball, but something kept nagging me in the back of my mind. All the accidents that had happened with me. The train was merely a fluke, but the other two only happened because I was with Paul. Like dating. Nearly drowning caused me to miss our initial first date, getting hit by the car; however slight, had happened right after our date.

"Is time trying to tell me something?" I wondered. It seemed crazy. But it kind of made sense. Time didn't accommodate for me having any sort of relationship with Paul, because it should never happen. It was the only explanation for the screwy accidents, and maybe even how John had dreamed my nightmare only nights ago.

"Time is warning me I don't belong here." I thought. It was quite the _down the rabbit hole_ thinking, but no matter how absurd it sounded, nothing else made quite as much sense. I didn't know what it meant entirely, but I worried that maybe my days here were beginning to be numbered. That lead to another string of thought. John had been locked in his room for hours after I had given him the letter. Had he read it? Why else would he stay locked up?

"Have I broken him?" I wondered. I was unsure what it would be like if someone walked up and handed me a piece of paper explaining the time, place and reason I was going to die, but I was pretty certain I wouldn't like it.

"I may have just made a worse mistake." I said to myself. Everything just felt so messed up and I was no closer to fixing it.

 

*****************************

 

Morning finally came, and after barely any sleep, I stumbled into the shower. It helped a little, but not much. I tried to put on a brave face for the day, but I was weighed down by so much else, it was hard. I had no idea what to do about Paul. If we kept going with our little relationship, would anything more happen to me? I didn't want to break up with him. I had no idea what to do about the wacky occurrences either and what they meant. I couldn't even begin to fathom something that was...impossible. Not to mention my whole identity and lie mess was still prominent. The ball that evening I should have been excited for, but to be entirely honest, you could have walked up to me, say I'd won a million dollars and a kitten and I still wouldn't have been very happy. After forcing some food down, I knew I was supposed to go dress shopping with Paul. So, I grabbed my things and headed for their suite. I knocked on the door, expecting Paul to answer. I was shocked and stunned to see John open the door. He looked like I felt. His eyes were bleary from lack of sleep, he was unshaven and in yesterday's clothes; his dress shirt was all rumpled and the top two buttons were undone.

"Um... I came for Paul." I said in a mouse's voice as my eyes gravitated toward the floor. The door closed as I looked up again. Tears quickly welled in my eyes and I took a shaky breath. He looked **horrible**! And it was my fault. He'd clearly read the letter, it was the only explanation. When the door opened next, it was Paul, all ready to go. I mopped my eyes dry and pasted another fake smile onto my face.

"Ready to go?" He asked me with a cheerful tone.

"You bet." I replied. So we hit the town. I still felt kind of silly having Paul take me shopping, but he didn't mind one bit. I think part of why he did it was to keep me occupied. I was occupied, but only slightly. I knew I had to be in a good mood for that night, I didn't want to ruin it for everyone else, but I wondered if John would even go. I didn't dare ask though, because I really didn't want to know the answer. After shopping around for quite a while, I found a dress I really liked. It was a light blue long dress with short sleeves and a somewhat poufy skirt. After purchasing it, Paul and I went to lunch and then back to the hotel to rest up before the ball. I wanted to be alone again, but I didn't at the same time. Deciding to just deal with the emotional pain, I went back to the lads' suite with Paul and was greeted by George and Ringo. John once again was nowhere in sight. When I showed them my new gown, the two of them insisted on me putting it on for them to show it off. I agreed, relieved for a moment of child like dress up and headed to the bathroom to change. On my way, I passed what appeared to be John's room. His cap sat on the chair by the door. I have no idea what possessed me to go in there, but I did. The room was smaller than mine, but had a desk by the window. Sitting on top was my letter, unfolded on the table. Trembling, I touched the paper lightly. I noticed there were tear stains on the paper. Some relatively fresh.

"I wasn't crying when I wrote this..." I thought to myself. I had stopped by then on the plane when I wrote it, I remembered. But then it dawned on me and I felt my heart shatter into a dozen pieces. They weren't my tears... they were his. I backed out of the room quicker than anything before I started crying uncontrollably. He'd been crying over the letter. **Crying**! I didn't know what that meant, but I'd never seen him cry. I wasn't sure I wanted to. My heart was pounding in my ears as I closed myself in the bathroom and regarded myself in the mirror. I really did look awful. Pale, thin, tired bags under my eyes. I had to do something about that before the ball. I wondered if I could get a nap in, but in my state - especially from what I'd just learned - that didn't seem like it would happen. I changed into the dress, only half hearted by then. It did look lovely, I just needed the rest of my body to look the part. I left the room and went out to my audience who gave appraising whistles and applause.

"You'll be the belle of the ball." George smiled.

"Is that a Disney joke?" I asked before realizing Beauty and the Beast wouldn't come about until 1991. George didn't get it of course...why would he? So I just brushed it off.

I gave the boys a twirl in my dress, really noticing just how lovely it was, when the suite door opened and John came in. I stopped dead.

"Hey, where've you been?" Paul asked him.

"Out." Was the simple answer as he left right for his room. I heard the door close. I suddenly didn't feel very pretty anymore.

"I should go." I spoke quickly.

"Oh Ashley, no. You don't have to go. Just ignore him." George said. I smoothed my skirt and picked up my other dress I had sitting on the couch.

"No, no I want to get some rest before tonight. I didn't sleep well last night." I confessed.

"Oh. Well alright then. We'll see you later?" Ringo seemed just as disappointed.

"You bet." I gave him a smile as I left. Paul followed me out and closed the door.

"You don't have to walk me back. I'm literally just down the hall." My voice sounded as tired as I felt.

"I'm not going to, I just want to talk to you." He replied.

"What about?" I asked, tucking hair behind my ear.

"I know you're still upset about what's happened. And it must be worse for you given your ties to John in the first place. He just needs time to process everything. Especially what I gather you told him in the letter... about how you two are related." Paul said, lowering his voice. I nodded slowly.

"I know he needs time. And I'm willing to give him that, but I just... I wish things were back to normal." I sighed. Paul touched my shoulder.

"I know. They will be." I wasn't so sure. I knew he was only trying to make me feel better, but really it wasn't his problem to try and fix, it was my own. When I got back to my room, I changed into my pajamas and planned on sleeping for the next few hours. I couldn't get the letter out of my mind. As I hung up my gown for later, all I saw in my mind's eye was the tear-stained paper on that desk and John answering the door that morning looking horrible. As I crawled into my bed, I felt a hole in my heart that had been aching for days. Still, amidst all of that, I did drop off to sleep.

 

**********************

 

Third Person POV

"John, are you coming or what?" Paul knocked on his mate's door. He'd closed himself up in there again for hours. Paul wondered if he'd not go to the event that night and worried that the rift between him and Ashley would keep going. He hated to see such tension between the two of them, after the way they'd been together. They were inseparable and now Paul knew why, but he still wished things were back to the way they were before he spilled the secret. There was no answer and Paul was going to give up, when suddenly the door swung open, revealing John dressed in a nice tuxedo. Paul tried not to look surprised.

"Ready to go?" He simply asked.

"Yeah, I'm ready. Where's everyone else?" John asked, his tone mostly passive.

"In the lobby waiting." Paul answered. Without another word, the two of them left. John knew Ashley would be going to the ball that night, he'd seen her dress. She really did look lovely. He didn't know if he could tell her that though. He wasn't sure what to do with her. As the two of them made it to the lobby, John was blown away by Ashley. He'd seen her all dolled up before, but this was different. The dress made her blue eyes pop, she had done her hair in curls and pinned it up, she was wearing glittery makeup. She looked like a regular Cinderella. For a moment, he was a little emotional, though he'd rather die than show it. He wasn't sure if he believed Ashley. He still felt angry at her, but the letter... _damn_ that letter. For the first time, he understood. He understood why Ashley and he were so smitten, why she adored him. Why they were so alike. He was still at odds with himself whether he believed it or not. Not to mention the clear warning in the letter. That scared him! It was the dream he'd told Ashley about, only it was real and in his future... it was probably some kind of proof that Ashley really was who she claimed to be but it was just a lot for him to process. He didn't want it to ruin his relationship with Ashley forever, but he didn't entirely know what to do next. For him, it was easier to have Ashley think he was still angry at her until he could sort out his feelings. It seemed cruel, but he could think of no other way.

"Ashley, you do look beautiful." Paul smiled at her.

"You've said that already, but thank you." She smiled, looking down at her gown. She looked better than she had that morning. She looked up and saw John standing alongside Paul.

"You all look lovely too." She simply stated, refusing to make eye contact.

"Shall we go then? The car is waiting for us outside." George asked, breaking the silence.

"Good, yes. Let's go have some fun." Paul replied. The three took off, leaving Ashley and John. She still wouldn't look at him and was just fighting with the knots in her stomach. She reached up and touched her locket that he'd gifted her with only days ago. John wanted to say something to her, but he didn't know what. For the first time in his life, he was completely tongue tied.

"Hi." His mouth finally said. Ashley looked up, her blue eyes glistening with tears. John felt awful. He was initially very angry with her upon finding out she'd lied and he thought she was insane. The letter had shed some light and now he felt terrible for blowing things up. even if he didn't want to believe it, Ashley did have her reasons. That, or she really was crazy, but either way...he couldn't get angry with her for trying to figure herself out and figure him out, for whatever reason. She didn't say anything back to him, just spun on her heel and went out to the car.

 


	41. CHAPTER FORTY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next few chapters deal heavily with a sexual assault incident, I realize this is a very serious topic and if this makes you uncomfortable, I apologize.  
> In this chapter, the boys and Ashley attend the ball and everything starts out wonderfully. It doesn't stay that way, but John finally reconciles with Ashley.  
> In advance, I apologize for my novice level french in this chapter.

**CHAPTER FORTY**

 

****

The car ride was silent, no one really dared to speak. Needless to say, it wasn't an exciting atmosphere, and it should have been.

"Why didn't you say hi back? That was the most civil thing he said to you in the past couple days." I thought, staring out the window.

"Just let it go, Ashley. Try and have a good night." I wasn't sure if I could.

"Is there gonna be alcohol at this thing?" Ringo suddenly asked.

"I hope so." Paul answered. He sounded tired too. I knew this situation was stressful on him, and George and Ringo too. They were all caught in the middle of this. So that was another thing I could feel bad about. I started tracking my fingernail over the design on my locket and noticed John was watching me. I stopped, looking down into my lap. I had a bad feeling it would be a long night.

"Why can't you just talk to him? I thought. Well for starters, I could probably get my head torn off. I knew he read the letter, what difference would it make? It would still be up to him whether he believed it or not, or thought I was a shoo in for the psych ward. As we pulled up to the building, I was the first to get out, Paul followed and took me by the hand. I didn't care who saw. I wasn't even in my disguise. That night, I was Paul's date and the broken princess all rolled into one. The tabloids could write me up however they wanted, it didn't make any difference to me. Nothing mattered to me anymore. The ballroom was very fine, elegant string music was playing.

"Would you like to dance, Ashley?" Paul asked me with a sweet smile. He seemed happy, but his hazel eyes spoke volumes. I didn't want to be miserable around him any more than I had been, so I smiled back and agreed. We headed to the dance floor, just as a slow song queued up.

"Your eyes look so sad." He noticed.

"I could say the same about you." I replied, without missing a beat.

"I just feel for you, Ashley." I sighed and tried to focus on the music.

"Let's not think about it right now. Let's just forget it and have a nice time." I said. I intended to perk up as much as I possibly could. As the song concluded, we all clapped politely.

"Do you want champagne or anything?" Paul asked me. I wanted to say yes, but I'd sworn off alcohol.

"One won't kill you, it might take your edge off." I thought.

"Sure." I smiled. So we headed toward the drinks. As we did, Ringo and George came over.

"There you are. Ashley, we did something." Ringo smiled, his eyes twinkling with excitement. I gave them both a funny look as Paul handed me a glass of the bubbly liquid.

"What did you guys do?" My tone was cautious.

"You're gonna sing!" George announced. I almost dropped my champagne flute.

"What?" I asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, it's all arranged. The singer they got for tonight can't make it, and we overheard the conversation and said our good friend Ashley Bunting could sing. So you've got the job! Do you know Moon River?" Ringo explained. My heart was racing. They got me to sing? In front of all these strangers?

"Sure, everyone knows Moon River." I replied, utterly flabbergasted.

"And it's gonna be English, the band is from England and never asked if you could sing in French or anything so, yeah. This is your moment." George smiled.

"Well how about that, Ashley?" Paul asked, clearly excited for me. I didn't know what to think. I could sing in front of people, that was okay I guess. But wouldn't people take my picture?

_"I thought you didn't care."_ The voice in my head said to me. I didn't really, but... I just really felt nervous.

"I...I don't know what to say." I said, honestly as I took a long sip of champagne.

"But you'll do it?" Ringo asked. I took a deep breath.

"I'll do it." I agreed. The three of them cheered and Paul hugged me.

"It'll be perfect, I know it will." He told me, pecking my cheek lightly. I had to smile, it really was exciting to think about. With a twist of nerves. I knew Moon River was from the Audrey Hepburn film that would have been released only a couple years ago; Breakfast at Tiffany's. I had to do her justice.

"Thanks, Paul. So when do they want me to do this?" I asked, looking down at myself to make sure my dress still looked amazing. It did.

"Anytime you're ready." Ringo replied. I looked at Paul with this wildly giddy smile that I had no idea I had hiding.

"Go knock em dead." He smiled, clearly glad to see me genuinely happy for once.

"Okay... here I go." I said, kind of nervously as I followed Ringo and George. I took a few deep breaths, trying to get in my right mind to do this. As if like magic, I seemed to forget about John for the next five minutes. I approached the stage as George and Ringo introduced me. I shook the hands of the instrument players as one of them announced in French that the 'lovely Miss Ashley Bunting would be singing Moon River.' I didn't give my fake name a second thought as I took the stage. The piano began the tune and I took one last deep breath for courage and began.

Third Person POV

John had basically been milling around by himself since he arrived at the ball. This wasn't his usual evening plans, he wasn't a fan of the fancy attire and snobby high class people. None of the lads really were, but he hadn't seen any of his band-mates in quite a while. It didn't bother him thought, because he'd rather be alone, spending a lot of time just in the front area. He was still in the throes of what had been revealed to him through Ashley's letter. He kept trying to rehearse things to say to her, but they all sounded stupid. He just really wanted to leave and go back to the hotel. And he almost did, until he heard the music stop and someone announce a name. Ashley Bunting. Not her real name, according to everything, but it was still her. It grabbed John's attention and he went back to the ballroom, pushing past people to see the stage. He saw Ashley get up there and music start to play.

_ "Moon river, wider than a mile _

_ I'm crossing you in style, someday... _

_ Oh dream maker, you heart breaker, _

_ Wherever you're going, I'm going your way... " John made his way pretty close and locked eyes with Ashley. She saw him, but kept going. _

_ "Two drifters, off to see the world _

_ There's such a lot of world to see... _

_ We're after the same rainbow's end..." Her gaze didn't move from his. She was entirely too captivated by the moment. _

_ "Waiting round the bend... _

_ My Huckleberry friend... _

_Moon river...and me."_

She finished, taking a little curtsy. Leaving the stage, Ashley needed a moment to collect herself. John was going to go after her, he needed to talk to her. He might come off sounding like an idiot, but seeing her up there made him need to find her. Only he couldn't. After leaving the stage, she'd virtually disappeared.

Ashley's POV

"I did it." I said to my reflection in the bathroom mirror. It felt amazing to perform for someone either than the four lads. It was nerve wracking all at the same time too. Especially when John showed up. He looked right at me, as if looking directly into my soul. I wondered if he wanted to speak to me. Would I be able to handle it?

"No Ashley. Just enjoy tonight." I told myself. So I would avoid him. As I left the bathroom, Paul was in the area, scouring the place for me. When he saw me, he ran over and literally picked me up and spun me around!

"You were amazing up there!" He exclaimed, finally putting me down. I laughed with genuine delight. I didn't think he could pick me up, he always looked like such a delicate fellow.

"I know! It was so surreal, I felt like I was in a movie or something." I laughed. My eyes must've just been dancing.

"Well you're definitely a star." He smiled. I saw John behind Paul quite a ways back and he was clearly looking for somebody. I knew it was me.

"Come on, let's go find George and Ringo. I'm in a dancing mood." I beamed, ignoring my racing heart. Paul was glad to see me so light hearted, and agreed. I took him by the hand as we went back to the party.

*********************************

I truly did feel like the star of the night, the way the three went on about how well I did. I never saw John after that, I wondered if he knew I was avoiding him, but I didn't care. I'd deal with it after that night. I had an amazing night though. I spread myself evenly dancing with all 3 of them. My feet were terribly sore by the end of it all, but it was worth it. I made a mistake though. One that could have ended horribly if a certain person hadn't been secretly watching me all night. While I never saw John, he saw me and ended up saving my life. The night was drawing to a close, it was well after midnight and several people were taking their leaves. We were all still there, but I decided to go outside for some fresh air and maybe take my shoes off for a little bit. So I did, I stood outside the now quite front of the building, just enjoying the cool, crisp night air. I was still floating on a cloud from the night and I really didn't want it to end. Seemingly out of the blue, a man in a white tuxedo and horrible mustache approached me.

_"Pardonnez-moi, madame, mais je voulais simplement vous dire que vous avez une belle voix."_ He said. I saw no danger then and just smiled.

_"Je vous remercie. Je suis heureux que vous l'ayez apprécié."_ I replied.

_"Ah bien, vous parlez français."_ He smiled.

_"Oui monsieur. Y a-t-il quelque chose que je peux faire pour vous?_ " I asked. Then it got weird.

_"Par où je commence? Tu es très belle._ " He purred, reaching up to caress the side of my face. I backed up.

" _Merci pour le compliment, mais je ne suis pas intéressé..._ " I spoke firmly. What was this guy's deal? His breath smelled like alcohol and cigarettes. Gross. I tried to duck past him and go back inside, but he grabbed me, quite forcefully by the arm.

"No, no, you will stay with me. I cannot let such a beautiful woman escape." He spoke in heavily accented English. I wrenched my arm free. I wasn't taking this crap from him.

"I don't think so. Now get away from me, you pig." I spat. He grabbed me again.

" _Vous êtes sauvage. Peu importe, j'aime mes filles sauvages..._ " He growled. I was disgusted, and quite scared by him.

"Let me go!" I yelled, trying to pull free again, but he held on tight and pushed me back into the alleyway on the side of the building. He started babbling on in French and I was terrified. He wanted to have his way with me and God, he was strong! I writhed, punched, kicked, screamed to no avail. The man threw me down onto a trash heap and pinned me down before I could scramble away.

"Get off of me! What the hell do you think you're doing?!" I yelled, still kicking and punching at him. It was dark, I couldn't see very well and I was missing him. I started to cry.

"No one knows I went outside..." I thought, starting to panic.

"No! Help! Somebody help!" I screamed at the top of my voice as the man's hands began wandering. Just as I thought I was going to be ravaged by this animal, I suddenly heard somebody yell

" **Hey! You get your filthy ass hands off of her, right now!!"** I was too much in shock to realize who it was, but the person yanked my would be offender to his feet by the collar and clocked him good and hard in the jaw with their fist. The Frenchman fell to the ground, immediately unconscious. By that point, I was in hysterics.

"Who's there?!" I gulped, shaking like a leaf in that trash heap. I was certain my dress had been effectively ruined. The figure turned and knelt across from me. It was John.

"J-John..." I cried, falling into his arms, sobbing like a child.

"Did he hurt you? Ashley, did he hurt you?" John demanded to know, taking me by the shoulders and staring me in the face. His voice sounded weird, I don't think I'd ever heard that tone. I shook my head.

"N-no... no he didn't hurt me..." I stammered. He pulled me back into his arms and I was still shaking. He most definitely would have though, had John not stepped in.

"Shhh...you're okay now. I've got you." John said in a soft voice. I kept crying though; I'd been rattled to the core. I couldn't force my arms to pry themselves from John. In that moment, he felt safe. He smelled like cigarettes and aftershave. I never wanted to let go of him for fear I'd be hurt. I was clearly in shock and in no shape to stand on my own, so he carried me. I ended up in a car, but passed out shortly afterward.

********************************

I heard conversation faintly in the background. I opened my eyes, and it was still dark. I was in my bed in a nightdress I didn't remember changing into. I heard John say the man who had tried to force himself on me had been arrested, and John said that I had been rattled like fine china, and probably in shock. I heard Paul lamenting, blaming himself for letting her go off by herself. John then said it was nobody's fault, just unforeseen occurrence. He said I was damn lucky he stepped in when he did. I heard footsteps after that and a door close. I thought I was alone, until my bedroom door opened. I shut my eyes quick and peered through my lashes. It was John who came in. I heard him sigh.

"Oh Ashley..." He whispered. I heard him come to me and felt a blanket cover me. I then felt him brush the hair away from my face. It was still in curls, I knew it would be a mess by morning, but oh well.

"I will always protect you." He whispered, before he left. As I heard the door close, a few tears spilled through my lashes.

**  
**


	42. FORTY ONE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of the last chapter, bridges are also mended.

**CHAPTER FORTY ONE**

 

When I woke up the next day, I felt well rested. Coming off of an adrenaline high certainly was the perfect sleep medication. Even if the cause was absolutely horrible. As the memories of the night before came flooding back to me, I both wanted to laugh and cry. Laugh because I had sung Moon River in front of a bunch of French socialites and killed it, and cry because of what nearly happened to me in the alleyway. Not to mention what had happened after. John rescued me. He was there for me. He took care of me and made sure I got back to the hotel in one piece. I was beside myself and too emotional to realize. That made me want to cry too, knowing how we stood. Part of me wanted to curl up and go back to bed and maybe cry a little, but the other part of me won over as I forced myself into the shower. My hair was as I assumed it would be, a frizzy mess. That and I was washing glitter off of my face for about five minutes. I tried to push out of my mind what that awful man wanted to do to me. Had he succeeded, I don't know how I would have lived with myself. It made me sick just thinking about it.

"Why do these things keep on happening to me?" I thought, dismally. I knew it was just one of those wrong place, wrong time situations, but still...

"Don't let it ruin how good of a night it was though. The important part is you're safe and sound now." I tried to look on the bright side, but I still knew that moment wouldn't be too easily forgotten. I dressed in a plain grey dress and braided my wet hair into two thick braids before leaving the bedroom. I didn't exactly know where I wanted to go, but I thought coffee would be a good start. Paul hadn't been bringing it around lately and I missed it. To my utter surprise, laying passed out on the couch, still in his dress shirt and pants was John. I was taken aback. I hadn't expected him to stay the night... I was timid of him, now in my semi right mind. Would things go back to how frosty and awkward they were before the incident the night before? I didn't want to wake him up, but decided to throw a blanket over top of him. As I did, wouldn't you know it, he woke up.

"What's going on..." He mumbled, half awake.

"Shh, sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." I said in a soft voice. He looked at me funny.

"Ashley...?" He asked, but then his brain woke up and he sat straight up.

"Ashley! You're awake." He announced.

"Uh, yeah. Last I checked." I wasn't sure if I was joking or not.

"How are you? Are you okay?" He demanded, going into 100% full protective mode. I remembered what he'd said to me when he thought I was asleep only hours ago.

" _I will always protect you..."_

"I-I'm fine." I couldn't stop my bottom lip from trembling, so turned away. He laid a hand on my shoulder and I just wanted to cry, scream, throw things and have a downright fit over everything. Before I could even speak though, a brisk knock came at my door. Without a word, I went to open it and Paul stood on the other side. Upon seeing me, his eyes widened and he hugged me tight.

"Ashley, thank God." He said, and my eyes welled with tears.

"I'm fine." I repeated my fib. Paul looked past me to John who still stood standing near the couch.

"Did he sleep over?" Paul asked me. I looked back at him.

"Uh, yeah. I guess he did." I replied, letting Paul come in.

"I stayed near her in case she had nightmares." John spoke up.

"I didn't...slept like a baby." I must've looked ready to have a breakdown, but I tried to put on a relaxed expression.

"Well that's good. Um...the police are downstairs. They want a to take Ashley to the station to get a statement from her, over...what happened." Paul spoke to John, though it involved me. I felt anxiety rise inside of me. I didn't want to do that. I'd sooner just forget about it. John glanced over at me.

"Ashley? Do you feel up to that?" What was going on? It was like invasion of the body snatchers. No one was behaving like themselves. I was a hot mess, John was suddenly being all father like, protective and deep, Cheeky Paul was a regular basket case of nerves... I chewed on my thumbnail, folding my other arm across my chest.

"Well they need it, so I suppose I'll have to." I concluded. I didn't feel up to it, but I didn't care.

"Right. I'll go with her to the police station." Paul offered, but John shook his head.

"No. I'll go." Why? I didn't say anything though as John left to change and instructed me to wait for him. I did as I was told, but I was completely overwhelmed. What had happened to the old days in their London flat, playing practical jokes, playing piano and singing, slow dancing to old records, listening to them play in the studio... I longed for those simple moments again. Suddenly, everything was a mess. Paul and John were both so unfamiliar to me in the last few minutes that I started freaking out. George had almost drowned in Miami for God's sake. I sat forward on the couch and leaned my head into my hands. I felt defeated. And in that moment, I really wished all of this was just one big dream and none of it was even real. It still could have been, I didn't know. When John returned, he was dressed in slacks, a dark turtleneck and a jacket. It was the most casually dressed I had ever seen him, but I said nothing on the matter. I wordlessly grabbed my jacket and bag before following him down to the lobby. I felt anxious upon seeing the police officer waiting for me, but just followed him out to his car. I tried as hard as I possibly could to keep it together as we approached the police station. John walked alongside me, almost as if he was being my bodyguard. I could say nothing to him, I wouldn't even know where to begin. My eyes were sore from keeping tears in, but I kept going. We went into the police station, and I knew I'd most likely have to give my statement in French. That was no problem, just another technicality I never thought of. The officer lead me into a private room and was going to stop John from coming in.

" _Je vais lui parler seul, si ça ne te dérange pas._ " (I will speak with her alone, if you don't mind.) The officer said to me. John gave a look of puzzlement, not knowing what the man was saying.

"Wha...I don't..." He tried to communicate.

"He um...he says he wants to speak to me alone." I filled in, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Oh, I'm not leaving her alone." John was pretty clear on that.

"John, it's fine, really..." I tried to protest, but he wouldn't hear it. The poor officer looked completely bewildered. I sighed.

" _Il sent qu'il a besoin de me protéger. Il ne vous dérangera pas."_ (He feels he needs to protect me. He won't trouble you.) I roughly translated for the poor officer who relented and let both of us in the room. He closed the door and asked me to have a seat. John stood by the door, very much then like a bodyguard. I tried to ignore him as best I could.

 

" _Pourriez-vous me dire ce qui s'est passé la nuit dernière?"_ (Would you please tell me what happened last night?) The officer got right to it with a notepad and pen. I took a deep breath and tried to collect myself.

" _J'étais debout à l'extérieur de la salle de bal, recevant de l'air frais et cet homme s'approchait de moi et me dit que j'avais chanté magnifiquement plus tôt cette nuit-là. Il a rapidement commencé à faire des progrès vers moi et j'ai essayé de le combattre. Il était trop fort._ " I began. (I was standing outside the ballroom, getting some fresh air and this man approached me and told me I had sung beautifully earlier that night. He quickly started to make advances toward me and I tried to fight him off. He was too strong.) The officer urged me to go on.

" _Il m'a poussé dans l'allée sombre à côté du bâtiment et m'a fixé au sol. Je ne pouvais pas très bien voir, je pensais essayer de me défendre."_ (He pushed me into the dark alleyway beside the building and pinned me to the ground. I couldn't see very well, thought I tried to defend myself.) I recounted, starting to feel cold. I tried to not relive it in my head, but it wasn't easy, in no matter which language. I took another breath, that time a tad shaky.

" _Uh... Je ne pouvais pas bouger, et l'homme a tenté de retirer ma robe ... à ..._ "(I couldn't move and the man attempted to remove my gown...to...) I trailed off. I couldn't say it. It was to horrible a word, and yet had John not stepped in, that's exactly what would have happened.

" _Pour profiter de vous?_ " The officer filled in. Not exactly the term I was going for, but it got my point across. I nodded silently, feeling the burning behind my eyes intensifying. I was shaking again. I was still terrified, and by all accounts that was completely understandable. I tried to liken it to the man kissing me at the after-party I'd gone to back in New York, but that wasn't anywhere near what this felt like.

"Okay, I think she's done here." John stepped in, his voice firm. I didn't even look at him, lest I started bawling.

" _Quoi qu'il en soit, c'est ma declaration._ " I told the officer with the last ounce of self control I had. The officer seemed content with what I had told him and allowed me to go, promising the man responsible would be up on charges. Somehow, I doubted that, it being the 60s and all. Women weren't still as respected. But it didn't matter to me. It happened and all I could do was thank the good Lord that John had been there when he was. It almost seemed impossible that he would have been though, no one knew I had gone outside. I couldn't dwell on that though, as I left the station with john following closely. Neither of us said a word still. I didn't particularly know where to go then, I knew I had to get back to the hotel, but I didn't want to, so I just took off walking, not particularly caring if John followed or not.

"Hey, where are you going?" He asked, trying to catch up with me.

"I dunno." I muttered, jamming my hands in my pockets. He reached out and grabbed my arm to stop me.

"We should go back." He told me. I shrugged.

"Do whatever you want. I'll make it back there sometime." I couldn't look him in the eye.

"Come on, Ashley, don't be foolish." He sounded just like my dad in that moment whenever I was getting chastised over something. I bit my lip and looked away.

"Just stop..." I whispered, tears finally spilling down the bridge of my nose.

"Stop what?" Was his question and I faced him.

"This, all of this, just stop! It's like you're a different person... I-I don't deserve any special treatment...I don't...I don't deserve you... not after what I did..." I cried. His eyes softened.

"You didn't do anything wrong, Ashley. You were just...afraid." He could have been referring to any number of things that had happened in the last few days. But my heart told me he meant all of them. I then locked eyes with him and felt my entire foundation just crumble. All the pent up emotion over the last couple of days just came bursting out of me and I didn't give a damn who saw it. I fell into his arms and just let him hold me as I cried. I didn't even feel bad, because it's what I needed to do.

"I love you, Ashley." He murmured. That made me only cry harder.

 

************************************

 

I ended up back at the hotel, though I don't quite recall how. I was left alone for the majority of the afternoon which I didn't mind. I'd stopped crying, but I didn't feel completely better. I was hung up on what John had said to me. He loved me. Where had that come from? Was it purely because of how distressed I was? Or did it have deeper meaning? He wasn't mad anymore but we didn't talk about that. I wasn't sure still how I would talk about it, or when. Needless to say, I still felt very weird. I spent a good portion of the afternoon just writing. I cried a little more as I did so, but it was cleansing. Finally, around four, a gently knock came at my door. I opened it and it was Paul.

"Hey." I smiled.

"How are you doing?" He asked, right off. I shrugged.

"Okay." I responded truthfully. He looked uncomfortable and I wanted to know why.

"Are you okay?" I asked him.

"Me? Oh I'm fine." He was lying. I gave him a knowing look.

"I just feel for you. You keep having these awful things happen to you. I keep beating myself up because I wasn't with you last night. None of it would've happened had I not been with you and I feel guilty, because I still feel like it's my job to protect you." He explained. I nodded slowly.

"Well I won't have you blaming yourself for something that wasn't your fault. Life is just difficult sometimes. But I'm still here, I'm still okay." I assured him.

"Yeah, thank God for that...but as crazy as it sounds, I can't help feeling like these things keep happening to you...for a reason." He gave me a strange look.

"Because...I don't belong here?" I voiced my own assumption.

"Something like that, maybe. Yeah. I mean , I don't even understand really how you can be from 2015 anyway, but whatever the reason, maybe these are signs telling you to go back." I never thought I'd hear Paul say such words. They sounded just as crazy coming out of my mouth.

"I-I've thought about that...to some extent." I said softly. Paul frowned.

"Well, does it mean you have to leave?" He asked sadly.

"I don't know. I don't know anything about how I got here or when and if I'll be leaving... it just cramps my brain." I tried to put a small joke to it. Paul hugged me.

"You know I'd love for you to stay forever." He told me.

"I'll stay for as long as I can." I promised. It was all I could do. Besides, freak accidents/incidents or not, I wasn't finished here yet. Paul seemed satisfied by our little chat and let me go.

"So uh, the lads and I are gonna go out to dinner and maybe a film. You wanna come?" He asked me. I smiled.

"Sure. Sounds like fun." I needed to do something to move forward. At least it wouldn't be as awkward this time, John and I seemed fine, but that was a whole other bag of snakes I'd have to face soon.

 


	43. FORTY TWO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Ashley finally have an honest heart to heart.  
> I am not gonna lie I bawled writing this part and got emotional again editing it.

**FORTY TWO**

 

I should have been tired that night, I'd had a full evening with the lads. We'd gone to dinner and an old film, for me. For them, it was brand new but I had a nice time just the same. For the next week and a half, the five of us played tourist. It was fun, it kept me distracted from everything else, though I don't think it was a good idea to bottle it inside. There was still the major issue of the letter. After our moment in the police station parking lot, John and I had seemingly returned to the way we'd been before this entire mess began. Only, it wasn't the same. We didn't tease one another as much and that felt weird. I think Paul was still a little at odds too, I just wanted to fix it all. I slowly recovered from my fright at the ball, it took a while for me to process it all and analyze just how lucky I had been. It still scared me on occasion, especially at night, but I was getting better. No one spoke of it, which was probably for the best. But the one other thing no one spoke of was the letter. Paul knew the gist of what was in it to some extent, John obviously knew the full extent of what was in it, George and Ringo merely knew that I'd given it to him. John seemed like he'd pretty much forgotten about it in those ten days, which was highly unlikely, given his reaction to it. I knew the moment would come soon when I would have to address it. I didn't know still if he believed me, I hoped he did, but I had given the man such a heavy load to carry and he was only 23. I'd given him the exact time and location of his murder... I'd been over it in my head a hundred times, regretting I'd done that. But he seemed to be his usual self to some degree. But I knew John better than that. Beneath the smile, the jokes and those dark eyes, there was a storm just waiting to burst out.

 

**************************************

 

One night, I was having a hard time falling asleep. It had been another full day in Paris. I had purchased a beret and wore it all day. The lads kept referring to me as ' _mademoiselle_ ' and I thought it was cute. I was okay, I should have dropped off to sleep without a problem, but I was just completely wide awake. I wasn't even thinking about things that would stress me out. After a few hours of laying there, wide awake, I gave up on trying and got up. I changed into a plain black dress and shawl. I planned on maybe going on the balcony for a while and maybe the cool night air would make me sleepy. So I did, I stood on the balcony for quite a few minutes, just looking out over the skyline. Suddenly though, I heard harmonica music floating down. It was a slow, sad sounding tune and I wondered where it was coming from. I craned my neck upward. It seemed to be coming from higher up in the hotel. Eyeing the fire escape to my left, I decided to climb and see if I could find the player. I don't know what came over me, but I climbed up the fire escape, keeping my eyes peeled. As I reached the rooftop of the hotel, I caught sight of someone sitting on the edge of the building overlooking the city and playing such a sorrowful song. It took a moment for my eyes to adjust to the dark, but once they did, I saw it was John. Somehow I figured. I didn't want to scare him so I just stood there until he stopped playing. He must've known he wasn't alone though, because he turned around to see me standing there.

"Ashley, what are you doing up?" He asked me.

"I-I heard music. I was curious." I found myself tongue tied.

"I didn't wake you, did I?" Was his next question. I shook my head.

"Couldn't sleep." I said honestly. He shrugged.

"Me either. It's a nice night out." He turned back to the city-scape.

"Yeah." I said softly, going over to join him. I felt the butterflies in my stomach wake up and I knew this was probably a good time as any to...talk. The two of us were silent for a long time. I knew I had to say something, but it was so hard. Every time I thought about it, I saw my nightmares. I looked up at the sky and the full moon was glowing brightly. The stars twinkled in sequence and it was very breathtaking. Out of the silence, John started playing his harmonica again. He played a familiar song, the one I'd sang only days ago. I didn't know if he expected me to sing or not, but I did, not taking my eyes off the bright moon.

" _Moon river, wider than a mile... I'm crossing you in style, someday_

_ Oh dream maker, you heart breaker, wherever you're going...I'm going your way... _

_ Two drifters, off to see the world, there's such a lot of world to see _

_ We're after the same rainbow's end, waiting round the bend _

_ My Huckleberry friend _

_Moon river, and me."_

I sang softly, getting chills just from the tune. Slice fell between us again and I was just gonna chicken out and leave, when he spoke.

"I think we should talk." There it was again, the words almost nobody wants to hear, but I knew we couldn't keep dancing around the topic, it was too big.

"O-okay." I stammered, walking over to him and sitting down on the cold surface. He faced forward still and I wondered if he could even look at me. Flashes of my nightmares flickered through my mind again and I clenched my fists at my sides, trying to take control. After what felt like eons of silence, he finally spoke.

"It all makes sense, you know." It was my turn to pause.

"What does?" Stupid question, I know. He finally faced me and his expression was indiscernible.

"You. You make sense. Why you never gave up on me, even when I was making your life miserable, why you're just as stubborn as I am, maybe even more... why you look so familiar... its because you are...wh-who you say you are." It was like he couldn't say the word _granddaughter_. I just left it though. Nodding slowly, I chose my next words carefully.

"I know it's probably...insane and impossible, but I swear to you, I'm not lying. And I am...so sorry I never told you. I-I just..." Well, I didn't tell him because I was afraid. He took a breath.

"I believe you, Ashley. I didn't want to at first, but who else would... say something like that if it wasn't true." I sensed he was referencing his future death.

_"No!!" Gunshots rang out and echoed through my body._ I nodded, pushing that picture out of my head. I didn't know what to say next. I mean, this was by no means an easy topic. I looked down again, trying to scramble for something to say. What could I say? Everything that needed saying had already been revealed in that letter. But then again...

"I've wished, so many times that I could meet you. Even before I found out how we were related...back where I'm from. I always had this connection with you, through the music, the old interviews, just something inside of me knew that we had some kind of connection." It was weird speaking to him in the present/past tense like that, but it felt good to tell him that. It was true, John had always been my favourite. Sienna had of course always looked up to her grandfather as her favourite Beatle, and I guess I couldn't blame her. And I guess all that time, I had been looking up to my own as well.

"But you haven't. We don't know one another in your future." He restated the fact that both of us now knew, but I knew he was still processing it. I was dying to beg him to look out on that night, seventeen years from where I was then, sitting on the hotel rooftop with him in Paris.

"That's right." I said in a small voice.

"Because..." He trailed off and I thought of how broken he looked, days ago when I knew he'd read the letter. I'd done that. Why couldn't I have just left it alone?

"He needed to know..." I thought. But I wondered how much of that was selfishness. I'd reflected on that before, but now I actually considered it a real possibility. Was I warning him of his death out of my own gain? I began to feel really guilty again as silence fell between us.

"I'm sorry." I finally spoke again. John looked over at me just as tears welled in my eyes. I shouldn't have told him. Maybe I should have just let him hate me for lying to him. I could've done that, right? John being mad at me for one lie was scores better than pretty much ripping him apart over the whole truth of the matter. Maybe I was selfish. Maybe I was only seeing my future without him in it. But sitting there in the silence, I truly thought about that terrible night. I'd thought about it a hundred times before, most of them while back in a time period I didn't even belong in. That night wasn't about me at all. Sure it'd affect me about 30 years later, but the night it happened, I wasn't affected in the least. That night, my father lost his dad, my grandmother lost her husband – right in front of her, I might add – Paul lost his best friend, George and Ringo lost one of their best friends, his sister, cousins all lost a relative. But most importantly, millions of fans the world over lost John Lennon. They lost him in the most tragic way possible. He had so much left to give the world. In music, in philosophy, in just being who he was. Taking a breath, I opened my mouth again.

"I shouldn't have told you. It wasn't my place." He paused before replying.

"I understand why you did. I was giving you a pretty hard time about where you're really from. You just felt you had to justify why you're here." His voice sounded stronger than he looked. I knew he was aching to ask me all kinds of questions, some I wasn't even sure I wanted to answer. But I was too far down this hole to crawl back out.

"I still shouldn't have done it. I-I mean... look what knowing has done to you...and it's my fault." I tripped over my words, tearfully. Another pause.

"Is it quick?" He asked me. Tears spilled through my lashes. I didn't dare inquire what he meant. I knew.

"Um...fairly quick...I-I think. They um...try to revive you...the paramedics, but uh..." I tried to explain. I'd seen documentaries and old news reports on the event. As painful and horrible as it was, I knew my stuff. John nodded slowly.

"Well...I guess if I had to pick, I'd choose the quick way out." Was he seriously trying to make a joke? I choked back a sob. No. He could not be so accepting of this. I saw images flicker in my minds eye of the vigils held after his death. Hundreds, thousands of people crying, holding signs, hugging one another in mourning of him. I wouldn't let myself be the forefront of why I wanted to save him now. I couldn't stomach that anymore. No. This had to be for his fans. For my father. For music lovers the world over.

"John you can't...you can't just accept this." I wiped my tears on my sleeve.

"Well it's already my future, so why not?" I sensed a little hostility in his voice.

"You can change your future." I didn't know if that was true, the reminder of time accommodating for what should happen, entered my mind, but I couldn't get hung up on that. Besides, that was straight out of Doctor Who. I also didn't 100% know if this was all real or not. But I had to try. We had to try. He gave me a funny look, but I pressed on.

"Your future can be however you want it to be. You know the time and place now. You know it will happen if you don't do something about it. You could choose to stay home that night, be out later, call the police about a lurker, anything. I-I can't let you just accept your fate. Screw fate. Take a chance and fight it." More tears burned in my eyes, but that time with passion. After a moment, he smiled a little. I was thrown by that, expecting him to retort.

"And all this time I wondered where your stubbornness and passion came from." It was odd to hear him say something so sentimental, but I found myself smiling too.

"I told you once I take after my father's side of the family. It was true." I said.

"Oh I don't doubt it." He replied. He faced forward again briefly before he said

"Alright."

"What?" He faced me again.

"Alright. I've never been much for the passive, ready to accept whatever happens to me attitude. I'll fight. I really have no plans to die young. Besides, I gotta make sure I'm around to annoy you all growing up." He winked. I let out a half laugh.

"It'll be pretty weird, huh?" I asked. He nodded in reply. Thinking about it made me teary again. I couldn't imagine having him in my childhood life.

"Just...don't do it for me." I stated, after a moment.

"What? Why?" I took a breath.

"I was wrong. When I came here, I thought my mission was to form a relationship with you, to get to know you, before I never would. I thought I was supposed to get close to you so that when I returned home, knowing you're not a part of my life wouldn't be so bad. But I was wrong. I don't think I'm here for my own gain. I can't be here for my own gain. This isn't about me. You have to fight, you have to survive and live a long, full life, for them." I explained, gesturing outwardly.

"The air?" He teased lightly.

"No, no. Them. The fans, the music lovers, the people world over who love you and will love you for years to come. Do it for them." He gave me another small smile and shook his head.

"You know, you're really something else, Ashley Julia Lennon." He told me. Tears instantly fell from my eyes and he noticed.

"Why are you crying, now?" I smiled and brushed them away.

"I'm fine. It's just... that's the first time I've been called that." Next thing I knew, he was hugging me. He was new to that, initiating it, but I didn't say anything, just accepted it. In my heart, I felt a peace and calm I hadn't felt since arriving in 1964. When he finally let go of me, he gave me another look.

"Are we going to tell the others? About..." I thought a moment before deciding.

"No. Is that okay? I mean Paul knows...sort of. He knows I'm related to you and that I'm from the future, but he doesn't know...the rest. But I think it might be best if we just left it like that. I mean I've screwed up things already, as it is." I said, chuckling lightly and dragging my hand through my long hair.

"Yes, you probably have, but that's okay. We won't hang you for it." His sense of humour was returning. My heart soared to see him in good spirits once again, I only hoped his promise held true over the years. Everything hung on those words. We fell quiet again.

"Ashley Julia." He mused, half to myself.

"Yeah. I've always thought it was pretty. Actually I think, deep down that Julia is after..."

"My mother." He interjected and I nodded.

"My great grandmother." I added with a half smile.

"Yeah, I guess that's right." I watched as he looked up at the stars.

"You know she was more of a sister to me than a mother." I knew that of course, but I said.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I was brought up by an aunt. My mother was more of a friend I saw occasionally and we always had a good time together." He told me. Like I said, I knew all of this, but I didn't say so. It was nice to hear him being so open and talking about his past.

"Sounds like fun." I commented.

"Yeah, it was. When I was young, she gave me a star." I gave him a quizzical look. A star? He shrugged.

"Not literally of course, but she said that this star," He pointed above his head and to the left a little bit.

"Was mine. It sounds silly and I'm not even entirely sure it's the same star I've been looking at for years, but anyway...I thought maybe now it could be yours too." John tripped over his words slightly, probably a little embarrassed, but I was touched.

"Really?" I tried to curb my emotions.

"Well yeah. You are family." Was his response. I beamed at him.

"Thank you." It wasn't much, really. It was more of a gesture than anything, but that was the entire point. It showed me he accepted it. He accepted me, his future and despite the huge weight now hanging over his head, he chose to acknowledge me as part of his family. We must have sat out there for hours after that, looking at the stars. We didn't say much. I was okay with that. When I finally left and returned to bed, sleep came quickly and undisturbed.

  
  



	44. FORTY THREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley realizes her time with the Beatles is coming to a close.

**FORTY THREE**

 

I slept straight through until morning. No dreams plagued me, I was content for the first time in a while. It seemed odd, given what I'd been through lately. Given John's track record, his response to the night before and our conversation was very tame. I had half expected him to get angry with me again. Of course, he'd be completely justified, but he didn't. And I'd had my own revelation. It couldn't all be about me anymore. I had to remove myself from the equation. If I was going to save John, it had to be for everyone but me. And as it sounded, he was going to try and save himself, I was relieved to hear it. I think maybe knowing was a blessing in disguise because then he would be waiting for it. I was in a great mood when I woke up that morning, something else also pretty much a stranger to me. I showered and donned a pretty purple dress for the day. I even spent a little more time on my makeup than usual. When there was a knock at my door, I pretty much flew to answer it. On the other side was Paul and I gave him a cheerful smile. A genuine one.

"Good morning." I sang happily and he gave me a funny look.

"Who are you and what have you done with Ashley?" I knew he was joking, but it did have a ring of truth to it. I felt bad that I had put him through so much lately.

"It is me, silly. I'm just happy." I stepped back into the suite and he followed, closing the door.

"What changed?" He asked.

"We finally talked, John and I." I divulged. Paul looked pleased to hear that.

"And? Is everything alright between you two?" I nodded.

"We're fine." I assured him. Paul looked a few inches taller all of a sudden, as if he'd been slumped over by my problems with John as of late. Again, I felt a pang of guilt. I was correct when I said to John that I had screwed things up majorly.

"And how is he with the whole...letter thing? What was in that anyway? I mean I've never seen him like he was." More guilt. I remembered our agreement from the rooftop.

"He's alright. We talked through some stuff. It um...contained a lot of family stuff. I won't bore you with the details." I explained. He nodded, looking slightly disappointed I wasn't going to share. But then I had an idea. I could tell Paul about Sienna. For so long I was afraid to, because I felt he shouldn't know too much about his future, but John knew basically a huge part of his...so why not?

"Hey, you remember back in Miami, you asked me if Sienna was one of you guy's descendants?" I asked him. Paul nodded.

"Yes, of course I remember. You had your accident right after that." I bit my tongue, trying to keep the cheerful vibe.

"Well...I can tell you now. Sienna is...yours. She's your granddaughter and my best friend." I divulged. Paul's eyes widened, as he tried to regain his composure.

"She's my..." He trailed off, processing it.

"Do you know me in your future?" I didn't dodge that one anymore either and nodded my head. He had to sit down at that.

"Am I ugly?" I laughed out loud.

"Seriously, only you would ask that." I giggled.

"Well? Am I?" He tried to hide his own laughter.

"No, you're not ugly." I touched his shoulder, still laughing.

"That's so weird though. We know one another in 50 or so years. I'm old, but you're not. How is that fair?" I shrugged.

"Don't ask me. I still don't even know how it's possible I'm here, right now."

"I can just see it now. All of us four guys, older than dirt and still playing music together. It's gonna be great." Paul's hazel eyes were dancing and I kept smiling, even though my heart was aching. I longed to fill Paul in on the entirety of what John and I talked about the night before, but I couldn't. I'd burdened him with too much already and I couldn't bear it to see him have to carry the same weight as John now had to for almost two decades.

"Yeah. It will be." I merely replied. We fell silent for a moment, before Paul stood.

"Well, I'm not ready to be old just yet. I thought today would be a perfect day to climb the Eiffel Tower." He announced. I chuckled.

"You got the others on board with that, did you?" I asked.

"Well...I was hoping you could help convince them." He confessed, with a sheepish look. I rolled my eyes, amused and kissed his cheek.

"You're lucky you're cute." I teased.

"I knew you'd agree. C'mon." He took that as a compliment, goofball.

"Sure, I'll be right out." I agreed, heading to the door where my stuff was. Paul nodded and left the suite. I regarded myself in the mirror by the door and fitted my wig upon my head. As I did though, I realized I didn't want it on. Who cares if people saw me? I was done hiding. Ashley Bunting, the disguise of an executive assistant, they didn't matter. I was going to be me from now on. Ashley Julia Lennon. Instead, I donned my jacket and fixed my locket so it hung straight. I traced the design again, smiling to myself.

_You know, you're really something else, Ashley Julia Lennon..._ His voice echoed in my head. One last smile in the mirror and I headed out to join Paul.

"No wig today?" He noticed. I shook my head.

"It itches, it's been driving me nuts." I fibbed. It sounded more normal that way. Paul seemed to accept it, and we headed to their suite. As we did, I pondered over what I'd told him.

"Hey, just keep what I told you a secret, alright?" I asked.

"You mean the Sienna thing?" He clarified. I nodded.

"It's just..." I trailed off, looking for the right word.

"Weird?" He suggested. I chuckled.

"That's one word for it, yeah."

"Don't worry. I won't tell a soul." He promised. I knew I could rely on him. But then again, I'd sort of given him his own burden to bear. Though it wasn't the same as John. Regardless, I was kind of fighting with myself by the time we went to grab the others. They were up, of course, milling around.

"Hey guys." I smiled, entering the room.

"Hey Ashley. You look chipper." George replied.

"Well I am. Who's up for sightseeing? Paul wants to try climbing the Eiffel Tower. I thought it might be fun." I said, remembering what I'd promised. John came in from the other room.

"You wanna climb the entire thing?" He asked, as if that was the craziest thing he'd ever heard.

"Well, as far as we can go, anyway." He shrugged.

"It might be fun, imagine the photos we'd get up there." George said to Ringo.

"Yeah, I'm up for it." He agreed. I looked back to John and raised an eyebrow.

"How about you?" I asked, a smile tugging at my lips. He paused, looking from Paul and I to George and Ringo, then back again.

"Alright." He agreed.

"Awesome, let's go." I clapped my hands quickly.

"Yes, yes, we're coming, Miss Ashley." John said in a funny voice. I liked that we were back to normal; things felt alright again. But one thing I knew for sure was, those carefree days back in London where things were simpler and quieter, the pranks the piano playing, the late night dances were all a thing of the past. As we headed out, John and I lagged behind.

"Did you get back to sleep last night?" He asked me.

"Yeah. Did you?" I countered.

"I did. It was weird, I hadn't slept that well in days." I nodded, understanding.

"Same here." We shared a look before I broke away to join the rest of the group. I still had lingering worries about us, about him. I kind of wondered if he just accepted what I had told him about his future just to pretend. I knew it was unlikely, but I had a few what ifs floating around my head. As we made it to the lobby, he joined the rest of us, in a cheerful mood. Of course I could ask him if he truly believed me or if he intended to forget down the road when drugs came into his life. But I didn't. it wasn't my place, and he already knew too much about his own future already. Ultimately, he had to make his own choices in life, but I just prayed he'd heed my warning. As we walked down the sidewalk outside, I began musing to myself, just how John would be in my future. Would he still make music? It was hard to say. He had began making music again just before his death, he might still put out an album once and a while. How would he be with modern technology? Would he have a Facebook? Twitter? I tried not to laugh to myself at that thought. Would he still be a peace advocate? Would he participate in rallies? All I was left with was a bunch of unanswered scenarios, because the reality was that as it stood, my future had still lost him way too soon.

"You're quiet." George made stride with me after a bit. I gave him a smile.

"Just thinking." I told him.

"You do that a lot, you know." He smirked. I just chuckled, relaxing in his presence. In all of the madness around me, George never failed to make me feel calm. I couldn't believe I'd almost lost him back in Miami. As freaky as that was, I'm glad it turned out the way it did. It was what got the ball rolling for everything else to fall apart and somehow I felt it needed to. Because now, it was all falling back together, but in a new way.

"I know. Just have a lot to think about, these days." I admitted.

"I noticed. You've been under a lot of pressure lately. To tell you the truth, I was surprised to see you in good spirits this morning. What changed?" He was the second person to ask me that, but I didn't mind.

"I just finally let everything out. John and I had a long talk last night and we cleared the air. And everything just felt better afterward." I told him and he smiled.

"Never known him to be much of a 'sit down and talk things out' guy." He mused.

"Well maybe he's changed." I replied, half to myself, as I glanced ahead.

 

***********************************

 

By the time we actually got to the massive tower, I craned my neck upward.

"Funny, it doesn't look so big in photos." I said, half joking.

"Well it is one of the biggest towers out there, it wouldn't be so famous if it were the size of a house." John remarked with a smirk. I just rolled my eyes and chuckled.

"I know that." I wanted to say something different and kinda mess with him, but something stopped me. Like it almost didn't feel appropriate anymore. I didn't like the feeling.

"I'm so going to make it to the top of this thing." Paul said, his eyes dancing. I knew he was stoked to do this and of course, I wanted to make it a little more fun.

"Wanna race?" I asked him.

"Race up a tower?"

"Why not? Whoever makes it to the top last has to buy lunch for everyone." I challenged. Everyone seemed to like that idea and so we took off. Paul led the pack, but I was hot on his heels. We all started out pretty fast, but as we got higher, we all started slowing down. My knees were starting to burn, but I didn't care. I was gonna win.

"Whose idea was this?" Ringo panted about halfway up.

"C'mon you slowpokes, this is easy." I called over my shoulder, even though I knew it wasn't. Paul was still long ahead though and I had begun to wonder if he was part gazelle. Toward the top, I began slowing more and Ringo blew past me, laughing delightedly.

"Oh hey!" I cried, trying to step it up. By the time I made it, I was faced with Paul and Ringo both doing a victory dance. I laughed, breathlessly and clapped.

"Bravo, you too." I smiled as George and John joined us.

"Look who's last." Paul laughed. I turned and saw it was John who was dead last.

"Well, well, look who's buying lunch?" I teased.

"Excuse me for taking in the scenery." He tried to pass it off.

"Uh, uh. No excuses." I teased, waving a finger at him. We smiled at one another and the moment was over.

"Damn it..." I thought. What had happened? We used to rib on each other all the time. I liked it, he enjoyed teasing me.

"Last night changed everything. You changed everything." I was reminded. I felt my heart dip a little. All I wished for in that moment was something like when we'd run from fans back in the states and I was on his back, wearing a silly top hat. It was juvenile, but completely fun. I hated this. It was as if John had gotten older overnight. Regular him wouldn't have been dead last in a race for anything. He was too competitive for it.

"Wow, look at the view." George marveled, touching my shoulder and breaking me out of my thoughts. I followed him over to the railing and gasped. It was beautiful. From up there, you could see the entire skyline. I imagined it looked much better at night with all the lights dotting the horizon.

"It's beautiful." I whispered, feeling the cool breeze gently blow my hair back. I looked over and John was standing with Paul. Ringo was snapping pictures like crazy.

"Is it everything you hoped, Paul?" I asked. He smiled over at me.

"It's amazing, Ashley." He replied.

"Hey, why don't we all get a picture? You couldn't ask for a better backdrop." Ringo suggested, running up.

"Well sure, but are you gonna take it? You should be in the shot." I answered, walking over to him. He shrugged.

"I don't mind." He said, kindly. But I wouldn't have any of it. Scanning the platform, I saw a middle aged man looking at the view. Approaching him, I asked him in French if he'd take a photo of me with my friends and he obliged. As he took Ringo's camera and we lined up along the rail, I noticed the man didn't seem to realize who I was with, or care. It was nice not running from fans so far. Could you imagine running from them on the Eiffel Tower? When he snapped the photo, I thanked him and handed the camera back to Ringo. As I did, I was overcome by a wave of dizziness.

"Woah..." I said aloud, trying to gain my bearings. I grabbed on to the railing, I was afraid I'd collapse.

"Ashley, are you alright?" Paul of course, was at my side. It passed and I stood up straight.

"Uh...yeah. Must just be how high up we are." I smiled, brushing it off. A look of worry flickered across his dark eyes, but he nodded.

"Okay." We started making the trek down, after that. Luckily Paul was the only one who noticed my dizzy spell, I didn't want the other three worrying about me. I passed it off as nothing, but to tell the truth, as I descended the stairs, I remembered feeling similar once before. On the train back in America, heading to Washington. That time I had passed out and wondered if that was a message that I didn't belong in that timeline. I'd been fine since then, so it was weird having it again for no rhyme or reason. Of course, I thought it could be from getting whacked by a car there not too long ago, but I was otherwise fine.

"What happened when I had the dizzy spell the first time?" I thought as I kept going down the many steps. It was the first time John really opened up to me about his feelings. Was this a parallel? Because only hours prior, we'd had a major heart to heart. It wasn't like we hadn't had more in the time gap there, but it made a bit of sense. I'd had a couple small dizzy spells in that time gap too, but I was overwhelmed. The two that coincided with John were different. I began to fret. Did this mean my mission was coming to a close? I didn't want to leave. I was still technically dating Paul, George and Ringo both adored me, John was acting strange... I still had work to do. Didn't I?

"What would happen if suddenly I just vanished?" I thought as we reached the bottom of the stairs. They all knew I was from the future now and my stay with them was permanent, but how could I leave when I had so much left unsaid, so much left undone?

"You're quiet again." George commented, walking alongside me again.

"Sorry." I snapped out of my daze.

"Are you sure you're alright?" His calm, dark gaze searched my face. I smiled.

"I am, I promise." I replied as a wave of emotion came over me. George. Dear sweet George. I knew what would happen. I'd been over it lots of times. Cancer would take him at such a young age. John's death was preventable but was George's? I knew it was most likely caused by him being such a heavy smoker, but they all were. What were the odds that he'd get it and not the other three? I had pondered the thought before of asking him to stop smoking, maybe helping him quit altogether, but who's to say the cancer cells weren't already in his body? Who's to say second-hand smoke from his bandmates wouldn't be just as bad? There were too many variables and I hated it. George didn't deserve to have his life cut short either. But what could I do that would secure his survival? John's was still a big maybe. What was I supposed to do? Cure cancer before 2001? I blinked back tears as I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk.

"Ashley?" George asked. I threw my arms around him and hugged him tight. He reciprocated, though I assume he was confused by the sudden gesture. When I let him go, he looked at me funny.

"What was that for?" He asked.

"I just needed a hug." I replied, with a small smile. He returned the smile.

"You're something else, Ashley." He chuckled. Didn't I know it.

 

****************************

 

We had a lovely lunch, courtesy of John, owning up to his end of the bet. We talked and laughed, just like old times and for a while, I forgot everything weighing on my mind. When we returned to the hotel though, I was reminded of it all and I felt this tightness in my chest.

"What do you guys want to do, now?" I asked though, keen on keeping the positive vibe going.

"Well we're going to rest up a bit, we have a small show to do tonight." Paul replied.

"You guys have a show?" I had no idea.

"Not a big one like in America, but yeah. Did we forget to tell her?" George said, half to me, half to his mates. I raised my hands.

"Don't worry about it, things have been crazy lately. A show will be fun though, I always love seeing you guys perform." I smiled.

"Of course you do, you're our number one fan." John smiled and the tightness returned.

"Don't you forget it, either." I replied though, smiling back.

"So are you gonna come hang out with us?" Ringo asked as we headed for the elevator.

"Um..." I thought. But I had an idea.

"No. I think I'll go back to my room and get a little organized. Make sure I have something nice to wear tonight." I decided.

"Alright." Ringo answered.

"But I'll be by later." I promised all of them. Taking my leave, I headed for the stairs instead. That dizzy spell was a wake up call. Yes, I had a lot left I wanted to say and do, but who knew how much longer I was gonna be here? While I knew I didn't want to leave, I didn't know if it was up to me any longer. I knew home was waiting for me where I had to apologize big time to my mum and dad, tell Sienna all about my adventures, graduate, have my own life...so I'd leave each of the lads a letter. A personal letter of things I never got to say and tell each of them. Time, I felt, was running out, so it was now or never. When I got to my room, I locked myself inside and sat at the desk with some hotel stationary. I truly thought I would be at a loss for words, but it was quite the opposite. Words came to my pen quickly, and I began writing.


	45. CHAPTER FORTY FOUR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley pens parting letters to her boys, and quickly becomes very emotional. She wants to stay with them for as long as she can, but knows in her heart that her time to go is almost here.

**FORTY FOUR**

 

_ Dear Ringo: _

_ If you're reading this letter, then that means I'm no longer with you guys. It means I've gone back home to 2015. I just wanted you to know that I adore you and no matter what anyone says, you're the best drummer I've ever known. You have such a sweet disposition and I will never forget your kindness to me the entire time I was with you all. _

_ I wanted also to tell you to not stop taking photos. Its wonderful to see your journeys in life documented by pictures. You know what they say, one picture says a thousand words and I'm sure all of the ones I've seen you take of us on this adventure together fit into that category. I'd love to see those photos one day. I'd love to see you again one day...when you're all old and grey. _

_ Life is going to present you with a bunch of ups and downs, that's only natural. It's your choice how you deal with them. I have no doubt in my mind that you're going to live a full and vibrant life over the next few decades. Stay smiling, Ringo and be happy. That's my wish for you. _

_ Until I see you again, _

_ Ashley. _

 

Ringo was probably by far the easiest letter to write, I knew it would only get harder. I chose to do George's next, saving to do the hardest one of all, last. Folding up Ringo's and putting in an envelope, I got a fresh sheet and had to blink back tears. I tried hard not to get tear-stains on the paper, but I didn't know how long I could keep them at bay.

 

_ Dear George: _

_ So much has happened in the last three months with you guys and I wouldn't trade any of those moments for all the money in the world. If you're reading this, it means I've gone back home to 2015 and I want you to know that I'm really going to miss you. You've been this sweet, calming safe house that I could always rely on and I'll never forget your patience, your kindness and your up-building chats. I know we had a little bit of a relationship when I first arrived, I just wanted to assure you that I harbor absolutely no hard feelings towards you. You'll still always be my first kiss and that's something I'll remember forever. I want you to remember that no matter how rough things get, keep your head high and remember that the peacekeeper is the best way to go. It's your nature, it's who you are and I think that's lovely. Embrace it. Enjoy life, be who you are and never give up. Those are my words of wisdom for you. You may not think so right now, but you might end up influencing so many other people the world over with your gentle manner and your music. Don't stop playing guitar, don't ever think your song ideas are stupid either. You can contribute just as much as John and Paul. And if they argue you on it, tell them Ashley said so. 😊 I guess that's about all except I want to say I love you. I don't say that lightly, but I do. I love the man you are, the man you will become. I won't give you too many spoilers, but let's just say you'll become one of the most beautiful people I've ever heard of. You have a kind and warm heart, George and the world is in dire need of a heart like yours. Maybe I can see you again one day. I'd love that. I live in London, I'm in the phone book. _

My pen hesitated as I wiped away a few tears. It would be so easy just to tell him that he's going to die of cancer. But I didn't.

_ Keep smiling, George and remember that I'll be thinking about you. _

_ Yours, _

_ Ashley. _

 

Next was Paul and I prepared myself. I didn't think it'd be so bad, but I had a lot of apologies to make in his letter.

 

_ Dear Paul: _

_ I know you feared this day would come, but if you're reading this, than I'm no longer with you. Don't be sad though, I've gone back to where I belong. First and foremost, I want to tell you I'm sorry. I'm so very sorry for everything. Burdening you with my problems, getting mad with you when nothing was your fault, worrying you...I'm sorry. But it all hasn't been bad, has it? We've had some wonderful times together. I will never forget our morning coffee rituals, our chats, our kisses, everything. You've made my time here memorable and without you, I don't think I would have had as much fun. You're a wonderful guy and an amazing singer and bassist. Don't ever stop playing music, it suits who you are. I'm certain you'll go on to create many more amazing songs and influence lots of people. I said I know you in the future, so I know all of this is true. I can't wait to tell Sienna about my adventures with you, I'm sure she'll be downright jealous. She adores you so much, Paul. You're more than a grandfather to her. You're her favourite person in the entire world, her role model. She kind of looks like you too, I'm sure you'll find that out in your own in due time. Life is going to throw you all kinds of curve balls, as life tends to do, but I know in my heart that you'll be happy. You'll meet a lovely girl and fall in love with her. You're more than entitled to have that in your life and you will, I promise. I love you, Paul. And I know when we meet again, you'll be old and grey, but it won't matter to me. You'll always be young in my eyes. Stay strong, keep your head held high and remember that I believe in you. _

_ All my love, _

_ Ashley. _

I shed a few tears through that one, and I had the strong urge to write about December 8th, 1980 to him, but I couldn't. what I'd left him with was enough, it was what I wanted. As I looked at the three folded and enveloped letters stacked neatly on top of one another, I knew I was down to my last one. I took a deep breath. I knew this would be the longest and probably the most emotional. But I pressed my pen to the paper.

 

_ Dear John: _

_ Well, it's been one hell of a ride, hasn't it? You know what this means. You reading this means that I'm gone. Not in a bad way, I've just returned to 2015 with my mum and dad. I'm not sure just how much of history I've changed, but I'm assuming home will be pretty much the same, overall. Except you may or may not be there. I know we haven't had the steadiest relationship, our beginning was quite rocky, but I bet we can both look back on those times and laugh now. I told you that I thought my mission was to get close to you before I never would, and I think a part of that still rings true. Part of me is still afraid I'll wake up at home in 2015 and you'll still be gone. I know it's your choice and time isn't up to me at all, but I hope and pray that the world isn't stripped of you too soon. I'm sorry for putting you through that turmoil though, and lying to you. I know I've apologized already, but it can't hurt to say it again. I'll always remember our jokes back and forth, those special moments with you like slow dancing to Elvis Presley, your hugs, even though I know you've never been a huge fan of them. I'll never forget your fierce protectiveness, even when I thought I didn't deserve it. You've been there for me when I needed someone the most and I thank you for that. You're very special to me, more than you realize. I told you that you'd always been my favourite, even before I knew of our connection. Your songs always struck a chord with me and even more-so in later years. I understood your behavior in certain situations, and you just always felt familiar. Now, I guess I know why, but you have to know that I'm not the only person you've and will have a lasting affect on. I don't want you to feel dread though. I get the sense that maybe you feel this impending doom hanging over your head because of what you now know and it's not going to help if you just accept it and live the next several years as if you're already an old man. I'm asking you to do this for me. Live your life. Be you, smile, enjoy life, enjoy love, music, everything. Don't trudge through the next couple decades just waiting for that one day. Lots can happen in seventeen years, if you want it to. Find a girl, fall in love, get married, have a family, keep up your music. You say the best things in your song lyrics, sometimes I think without realizing how profound a statement you're making. And in the future, when my dad comes along, be good to him. In regular history, he lost you so young that it hardened him, I think. Be a good dad, I know you will be. Teach him about music, teach him things only a father can teach his son. And most of all, please just stay safe on December 8, 1980. I swear to you that there will be a man hanging around the Dakota building in New York City that night, wanting to kill you. Be cautious all that day. Anybody that so much as raises a hair on your neck, please call it in. I don't want you taking any chances, okay? My father deserves to have his dad watch him grow up and get married. You deserve to live and give the world so much more in your music, your movements, your glowing and kind heart. I have so much more I want to say to you, I love you and always will, you'll always have a special place in my heart. I hope to God I can tell you that one day soon. But for now, go. Live your life the way you should. Happy, full of memories and laughter. I'll be waiting for you. I'd wait forever for you. _

_ Until I see you again, _

_ Love, _

_ Ashley Julia Lennon. _

 

That was the only one I signed with my full, true name and as I did, tears spilled down my cheeks. I folded it up and enveloped it as well as I picked up my locket and rolled it gently between my fingers. I knew I had to cheer up soon, or when I went to join the guys, they'd ask what was up. they couldn't know yet. I wasn't even sure if I was truly being sent back to the future yet. This was all just in case. I didn't know how I'd know when I was leaving, it was too emotional to think about. I left the letters sitting there on the desk for the time being, I knew I had to get myself ready. Going to my bedroom, I decided to go through all my clothes and pick out something nice but not too fancy to wear to the lads' show later that evening. As I did, I was bombarded by memories. When George had gone out and gotten me a lovely red gown to wear to their first fancy party since I arrived, and he not only had gotten a dress, but makeup as well. It was quite the touching gesture from the guy who would be my first kiss that very night of the gala. I touched the fabric and smoothed my hands over it, smiling to myself.

_George was a lovely dancer. I felt like I was floating on air. As the song ended, I felt on top of the world. And then the most shockingly amazing thing happened. I got my first kiss. Not from Paul but George Harrison._

I kind of wish it had lasted, but all in all it had worked out for the best. Among the rest of my clothes were dresses Paul had gotten me. Some when I first arrived, others before we took off for America. I remembered how happy he'd been back then, completely doting on me for everything.

" _C'mon and get your coat." He said sweetly._

 

_ "I'm sorry?" I inquired. I was still a tad timid about our little 'moment' there a while back. _

_ "I'm not letting you go to America without having some new things to wear." He said with a small smirk. I froze. _

_ "Paul...you've done so much for me already. I'm fine with what I have." I chuckled. These guys really had to stop buying me clothes! _

_ "Nonsense, you're going to America! You need to look your finest...not that you don't look you're finest all the time...it's just..." Paul started getting a little bit tongue tied. Deciding to agree to his plans before he burst on me, I laughed and stood up. _

_"I'll come then." I said, patting his shoulder lightly as I walked past._

Back then he'd been kinda shy about us. It was kind of funny to see how far he'd come. How far we all had. In amongst all of that was a pink sweater I recognized instantly. It was from George on Valentine's Day. Smiling again, I held it up to myself in the mirror. I hadn't worn it because we ended up in Miami, Florida. I would've baked in the thing. I could wear it now though. It was simple enough and showed George I hadn't forgotten about his gift.

" _I just... wanted to give you something. I know we aren't a thing anymore...but its Valentine's, so I hope you like it." George said, kind of in an awkward tone. I felt bad for a moment._

_ "Oh George, that's so sweet of you." I told him kindly as I took the box and opened it. Inside was a lovely light pink sweater, it looked expensive. _

_ "Oh my gosh...it's lovely." I said, holding it up. _

_ "I hope it fits." Was George's answer. _

_ "Oh I'm sure it will. Thank you so much." I hugged him. _

" _You're welcome."_

It was decided. Packing the rest of my clothes away, I changed into a nice grey dress and put the sweater over top. I looked presentable, kind of like a high class girl would look, minus the high heels which I was so wary of now. Recalling that memory, I flexed my ankle, absentmindedly. That was right. I had sprained my ankle not long after arriving. I'd nearly forgotten. As I sank onto the edge of my bed and pulled a comb through my windblown hair, I sort of went on a trip down memory lane. So much had happened in a short amount of time, it was hard to remember everything. A lot of it was documented in my journal, but even then I forgot little tidbits. How John's hurtful words at first had really cut me to the heart, but slowly he'd seen that I wasn't an enemy, how George was sweet on me from the beginning and though we had our falling out, I still adored him, Ringo and his unfailing calmness in any situation, coffee dates with Ringo and Paul, playing piano in their flat, singing for the lads on occasion, making them food, looking after them...

"I don't want to go." I whispered aloud. And I really didn't, but I was torn. While I knew I didn't belong here, I wanted to stay and be with the lads as long as I possibly could. But I also knew mum and dad were at home, maybe I was missing in the future. Maybe mum and dad woke up the next day to find me gone without a trace. I'd considered that possibility before. What if it was true? Sienna would be broken. And would they ever find me? No, because I was in the past. 50 years in the past. I knew it wasn't my decision whether I stayed or left though, that much was obvious, because it wasn't my plan to get thrown back in time in the first place.

"But I'm glad I did." I thought as I stood and did my hair in the mirror. Nothing fancy, just a French braid. I knew I missed my parents and Sienna, I knew I did want to go back home, but I wished I could have both.

"But who says this is even real?" That inkling thought was still there. Sure it was possible and it seemed like the most logical explanation to all of this, but it couldn't be. Everything had been too real. The emotion, the physical pain, emotional pain, the nightmares I dealt with for weeks on end. It had to be real. I was giving myself a headache again, so I pushed it aside. What mattered was here and now. I had to embrace the time I had left, however long that was. As I got ready to meet the boys in their suite, I thought about what I'd wrote in John's letter and back to the Eiffel Tower. He was behaving like he was much older than he was. He was acting strange and I knew why. I needed to talk to him now. I couldn't watch him like this. He was happy and outwardly seemed like his normal self, but I saw past that. I glanced to the desk where all four letters sat waiting and went over to them. It wasn't time yet. I opened the middle drawer of the desk and set them inside, shutting the drawer on them.

"Embrace what you've got left." I reminded myself as I left my suite. When I got to the lads' I gave a hearty knock and the door was swung open by Ringo.

"Hey, Ashley. Ready?" He asked me with a smile. I nodded.

"You bet." I answered, stepping inside. George and Paul were lounging around, and the familiarity made me relax.

"Hi Ashley. Get all organized?" George asked, perking at the sight of me. I joined him on the couch, feeling a pull at my heartstrings.

"Yeah, wasn't much to organize, but it kept me busy for a while." I replied with a nod. I noticed him looking at my sweater.

"You're wearing it." He noted. I smiled again.

"I figured tonight would make a good debut of it. I haven't forgotten about it, don't worry." I assured him. Well he looked pleased as punch.

"It looks lovely on you." He told me. I fought off a blush and thanked him. I never really thought pink was my colour. I almost never wore it back home, yet here I'd worn the colour more than once.

"So when are we leaving?" I asked, changing the subject.

"Soon, we can take a walk if you're bored..." Paul trailed off.

"No, no. I'm alright." I replied, waving my hands. Ringo came and sat across from George and I, I hadn't noticed he left, and he had his camera.

"I can't wait to see how our photo turned out." I told him and he nodded.

"I've been meaning to get these photos developed. Do you want to come with me tomorrow?" He asked. That sounded like fun.

"Sure!" I agreed, happily.

"It's a date." He smiled. I chuckled.

"No, no Ringo. Ashley is Paul's, remember?" George teased, nudging my shoulder.

"I can still go out with Ringo, right Paul?" I replied in a teasing tone. Paul was trying not to laugh.

"Oh I guess so." He pretended like it was such a burden. But I got thinking. Was this weird now? I mean we'd been on like one date and only been doing like grade school relationship stuff. Besides, he knew most of the picture now. I was his best mate's granddaughter and his granddaughter was my best friend. I hadn't been fully on board with our relationship to begin with and though I had eventually come to accept it, I knew it wouldn't last. He knew that too.

"Should I end things?" I thought as I watched him laughing at something George said that I didn't quite catch. I didn't want to hurt Paul. Besides, I'd put him through enough already.

"But if he knows it can't last, then it won't be so bad, right?" I asked myself. I remembered earlier, my dizzy spell. It was my warning, my indicator. It had to be. I didn't want Paul to wake up one day while we were technically still together and realize I left without so much as a goodbye. I watched him, chatting with George and Ringo. He was happy, animated.

"Wait." I told myself. I couldn't do it now. As I snapped out of my thoughts, I realized someone was missing. I couldn't believe I hadn't noticed sooner.

"Where's John?" I asked, remembering my promise to myself. We needed to talk. Paul looked around.

"Probably the balcony. He's liking the view from there." He answered. I remembered our night on the rooftop. I stood, straightening my sweater.

"Just gonna go see what he's up to." I announced, before heading toward the balcony on the other side of the suite. The door was closed when I got there, but I saw him on the other side, leaning over the railing. I opened the door slowly and leaned around it.

"Hey. Want some company?" I asked. He turned his head.

"Sure." Was his answer. I couldn't gauge his mood, but I knew he wouldn't lash out at me now. I stepped onto the balcony and closed the door behind me. It really was a lovely view, I'm pretty sure Paris was made to be spectacular.

"Are we leaving?" John asked.

"Uh, no. Not yet. I just wanted...to talk to you." I felt nervous all of a sudden. He faced me then, his dark eyes softening.

"So talk." Straight to the point, alright. Of course, my brain decided to scramble every word in my head I wanted to say to him. I took a breath, trying to piece my sentences back together.

"I want you to have a life." I blurted out, before I realized how it sounded. Sure enough, he gave me an odd look. I raised my hand.

"That came out wrong. I um... I can't help but wonder if you're just waiting around for the next seventeen years, not having a good time, not living the way you can live..."

"Okay now it sounds like you're chastising him..." I thought, mentally facepalming.

"What do you mean?" He asked, still looking at me like I'd grown another head.

"You just haven't been yourself today...you're normally the spark that gets this group going and it's faded. I-I can't help but think that's because of what I've burdened you with. It's kind of like you've been just going through the motions all day and not really having fun. I-I don't want you to just wait for that day to happen, like so many years in the future...I want you to live. Laugh, have fun, don't worry and just be you. I don't know how much longer I'm gonna be here now and I really don't want to leave you this way..." I explained, slightly tripping over my words. John paused and for a moment, I thought he might get annoyed with me.

"Well I guess I have been still mulling it over. It's a lot to think through, you know." He finally admitted. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"I know... I just want you to be happy. You deserve to have an amazing life, regardless." I rested my arms on the railing. He gave me a small smile.

"I will, Ashley. I promise. If anything, I'll do that for you, if you let me." He winked. I chuckled, holding back threatening tears.

"I think I can allow that." I replied. We fell silent for a few moments before I fully realized what I'd said. I said something no one else knew. He realized too of course.

"What do you mean by you don't know how much longer you'll be here?" There was the question. I froze. Well I supposed it wasn't going to stay a secret forever. Paul knew about my spell on the tower, I'd attributed it to the height, but no...

"I um...well you remember back on the train to Washington, I had that dizzy spell and passed out?" I asked. He nodded.

"Well I sort of had another incident. Earlier today." I told him.

"What's that gotta do with you staying here?"

"I'm here for a reason, John. Both those times were after good steps forward in our relationship. I know it sounds stupid, but that's the only explanation I've got. I think my mission, I guess, is wrapping up here. I think I'm trying to find my way back to my own time." Man, it sounded stupid even when I said it.

"How has Paul believed this nonsense all along?" I thought. I expected John to pass it off as nothing, but he didn't.

"So you're leaving?" He asked, sounding actually sad! I bit my lip.

"Well, eventually. I don't know when. I mean...that's been common knowledge now for a little while. You know I am from the future."

"Yeah, but I guess I never really thought about it that much."

"It won't be forever. I will see you again." I said, though I knew that was still a 50/50.

"I suppose that's true." We fell silent again and I didn't like how I felt.

"But hey. That's not now. Now is I'm still here and I don't plan on leaving." I smiled. I knew it wasn't up to me, but I had to cheer both of us up. John straightened up too.

"Yeah, you better not." He smiled.

 


	46. CHAPTER FORTY FIVE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This story is approaching its end. Please enjoy.

**FORTY FIVE**

By the time we left, I was in a little better spirits. Of course, it was always exciting to watch the lads play their iconic music. I wondered though, as we piled into the car to take us to the venue, if this would be my last show with them.

"Stop thinking like that. You could still be here months yet." I thought. It didn't seem likely though, no matter how much I wanted to. I longed for my peppy mood I'd woken up with.

"Maybe the concert will perk you up again." I told myself as I watched the lads talking and laughing among themselves, like they normally did.

"So Ashley, how are you liking Paris?" Ringo leaned over and asked me, quietly. I smiled.

"It's wonderful. I almost don't want to leave." Boy, did that have double meaning or what? He nodded.

"I know it hasn't been as smooth as I'm sure you'd hoped, but I hope you are having a good time." He was referring to any number of things. The truth coming out in Miami, the horrid ending to a lovely night at a fancy party, my friction with John...

"Despite the bumps, yes I am having a nice time." I replied, choosing to look on the positive.

"Maybe tomorrow we can go to a real French café. With your grasp on the language, I won't look so foolish." Ringo smirked. I chuckled.

"Sure. That sounds lovely." Somehow, a simple outing with Ringo tomorrow was what I was most looking forward to. Maybe I needed a break and Ringo had been there in the past to provide that kind of break. I had no history with him, present or future, and he was a lot like a good friend to me. Someone I could rely on to listen to me talk. And that made him just as important as the rest of them. I knew he got ridiculed a lot in later years and even earlier in their career when he joined the group. He didn't deserve it either. In my eyes, he was a kind, calm person and I adored him.

"What are you two gabbing about?" John asked, noticing our private conversation.

"Our date tomorrow." Ringo answered, without missing a beat, but joking entirely. John's eyes widened.

"Date? Does Paul know about the competition?" He asked me, a smirk tugging at his lips. I smiled at Paul.

"You know, right?" I asked him.

"I know, and it's breaking my heart." He sighed, over dramatically.

"Oh grow up." I giggled, reaching across and punching his arm lightly. I felt my spirits rising again as we all laughed at just plain silliness. Maybe that day would turn out alright still.

 

***************************

 

Well Paris was a lot less crazy than America was. There were crowds lined up already, hours before the actual show, but they seemed a little tamer. That or I had adapted to the craziness, I wasn't sure which it was. We were ushered into the building immediately and the vibe was infectious. To my surprise, once we got to the dressing room Brian Epstein was there! Funny, I'd kind of forgotten about him as of late.

"Finally caught up with us eh?" John asked him as he came in with the others in tow.

"Yeah, I haven't seen you around lately." I added, with a friendly smile. We'd had our issues, him and I, over whether I was good enough for the guys or not. But overall I had no hard feelings against him. I briefly wished though that I could forewarn the lads about their manager's death in 3 years time, but didn't.

"Well this was supposed to be a little bit of a holiday. I'm here for the show. How did the ball go?" He said, asking the boys. I let out a breath. That felt like ages ago, when it really hadn't been. John looked at me, but I shook my head. I didn't need to trouble their manager with more stories of my unfailing bad luck.

"It went fine. Ashley actually sang." John answered, grabbing Paul's arm to stop him from starting to talk because, I knew we were both thinking the same thing. Paul would tell the whole story. Mr. Epstein looked at me.

"Did she? I didn't know she could sing." He remarked. I still wasn't a fan of being talked about like I wasn't in the room, but I left it.

"Oh yes, she's quite talented." Paul finally said as John let go of him.

"Ashley, why don't you play a song?" George asked.

"Oh no...you guys have to get ready for your show." I protested lightly. I didn't mind, but I didn't really feel in the right mindset.

"C'mon Ashley. Here, use this." John urged, handing me his guitar. The very same one I'd used three months prior when I first arrived. I remembered the encounter like it was yesterday. He'd gotten so huffy over it and mean that I cried. I think he remembered too, because as he handed it to me, we shared a look. I sat down with the guitar, but it dawned on me that I had no idea what to play. I looked at the 5 faces watching me and somehow just started picking a tune.

_ "Edelweiss... _

_ Edelweiss... _

_ Every morning you greet me _

_ Small and white, clean and bright _

_ You look happy to meet me _

_ Blossom of snow _

_ May you bloom and grow _

_Bloom and grow forever..."_

My voice was soft, but clear.

_ "Edelweiss... _

_ Edelweiss... _

_ Bless my homeland forever... _

_ Small and white, clean and bright _

_ You look happy to meet me _

_ Blossom of snow _

_ May you bloom and grow _

_ Bloom and grow forever... _

_ Edelweiss... _

_ Edelweiss... _

_Bless my homeland forever..._ " 

I finished. It was then I realized that nobody else in that room had ever heard that song before... it wasn't out yet. The Sound of Music would be released the following year. Before I launched into a panic though, I remembered.

"They know I'm from the future." But their manager didn't. As they applauded, he looked puzzled.

"I've...never heard that song before. Where's it from? He asked me. I saw the lads share a look from the corner of my eye.

"Um..." I started.

"It's your song, isn't it Ashley?" Ringo suddenly piped up. Bless him.

"Uh, yeah. Just a little tune I came up with off the top of my head." I fibbed, shrugging. Mr. Epstein looked impressed.

"Well it was lovely." He answered. I smiled and thanked him. I needed a moment after that, so I got up and took John's guitar back to it's stand. I looked at it in my hands and I remembered the first time I held it. It had felt so familiar, looked familiar. I likened it to the one I had at home. Dad had given it to me years ago, mine was old and worn with time but it still sounded incredible. I loved the thing and when I was learning guitar, I played that thing until my fingers bled. But then I made the connection.

"Oh my God..." I whispered in awe. It was the same one! As I got a closer look, I could confirm it. The stamp on the inside was the same, the designs on the tuning keys were the same...

"It's the same guitar. I've been playing his guitar for years!" I wanted to scream. I suddenly wanted to cry again, because even though dad had shut out that entire part of his life and heritage, he'd still entrusted his daughter with probably the most beloved instrument his father had owned.

"You alright?" I heard John behind me and I almost dropped the guitar. I spun around and my eyes must've been the size of softballs, because he looked concerned.

"I-I'm fine. I just..." I trailed off before I realized I could tell him.

"I uh...have this guitar. Back home." I told him.

"Really? How's it look?" He replied with a relaxed smile.

"Old." I chuckled.

"But playable. I love it. It's what I learned to play on." I informed him. He nodded.

"Well maybe if everything works out in the future, we can play together." He suggested, with a wink. My heart swelled with emotion.

"I'd love nothing better."

"Hey Ashley, where was that song from, anyway?" I heard Paul say across the room. I turned around and saw Mr. Epstein had left the room.

"Who's saying it wasn't her song?" George added, only half serious. Laughing to myself, I walked back over.

"It's not mine Ringo just said that to help me out. Thanks by the way." I said, nodding to Ringo.

"It's actually from a musical that hasn't been released yet." I admitted.

"So...we all just got a sneak preview of the future? I like this advantage." George laughed.

"A very small one. I can't tell you guys too much about your own lives. Where's the surprise in that?" I said, seriously. Paul shrugged.

"It might be helpful, like if one of us were to die, you could tell us how and we could, you know, make sure it didn't happen." My heart froze, mid beat. I felt this huge lump in my throat as I tried to find the right thing to say. I couldn't look at John, I'd lose it.

"I-I don't think that's up to me. Ultimately you guys own choices result in the outcomes." Okay that sounded stupid. I had to sit down, lest I have another panic attack. Again, I thought of George.

"Well you can tell us if we're all still alive in your future, right?" Ringo asked, his blue eyes full of innocence. Well crap. How did I get out of this one?

"No, actually John is a murder victim and George dies of cancer." I thought. Was I cruel? It was bad enough John knew his own fate. I needed a way out of this conversation and fast.

"Sorry, I need some air." I finally gasped, practically running from the room. When I got outside the dressing room and down the hallway quite a ways, I caught my breath in gasps. And then the dizziness hit me again. I threw my hand out to the wall so I wouldn't topple over as hot tears burned behind my eyes.

"No, no I don't want to go yet. I can't." I cried to myself. I hated that all of this was up to me either to fix or just leave it as is.

"Just tell them all." I thought. But that would be wrong. I knew it would be. I was still having an issue with the burden's I'd put on Paul and John already. The dizziness wouldn't go away and I was afraid. Afraid I'd be thrown back into the future in that moment.

"No..." I whispered, now practically hugging the wall. My vision was distorted and in front of me I saw my dad.

"Ashley?" He was saying my name.

"Dad..." I called out softly.

"Ashley...are you okay?" He asked. My dad's face blurred away and I was facing John. I let out a breath and fell back against the wall.

"Are you okay?" He repeated his question.

"I-I just had another episode. I'm okay." I told him, trying to calm my racing heart.

"Do you want to find someplace to rest?" Great, now I'd gotten him worried. I shook my head and straightened up.

"N-No, I'm good." I decided. John didn't look convinced, but he left it.

"Did the questions freak you out?" He asked. I nodded.

"You couldn't tell them our secret." Again, I nodded.

"It-it's not fair to them. It's not fair to you that you already know." I re-stated, hoping he didn't ask me the same question Ringo had.

"Life isn't fair, Ashley. You should know that by now." He smirked. I let out a small laugh.

"Tell me about it."

"Are you sure you're gonna be okay?" He asked again, his brows furrowing.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." Though I wasn't too sure. That one was pretty bad and figures, it happened after John and I were talking about his guitar. It couldn't be a coincidence. We'd had a moment. A profound one.

"Well stop having those moments and you'll stay." I thought as I followed him back to the room. Of course that was silly. But still, I didn't want to go. I was getting scared. That was the second one in a day. Maybe I'd have to give my letters sooner than I thought. I wasn't remotely prepared to say goodbye, even though I'd see Paul in 50 years time and hopefully Ringo as well. John was still a maybe and George... I couldn't bear to think it.

"But what if it is all just a weird dream and everything is exactly the same as you left it." I thought. The possibility had never left, but I knew in my heart that couldn't be the case. As I got back to the dressing room, the other three were standing anxiously, waiting for my return.

"Found her." John announced.

"Ashley, we're so sorry." Paul was the first to speak, giving me a hug.

"Wh-What for?" I asked.

"We shouldn't have bombarded you with all those questions about the future. It wasn't fair." George answered that one as Paul let me go.

"It's okay guys." I smiled, relaxing a little.

"Are you going to be alright?" Ringo asked me. I looked over at John and swallowed hard.

"Yeah."


	47. FORTY SIX

**FORTY SIX**

****

_ "Wait, oh yes wait a minute mister postman _

_ Wait, wait mister postman _

_ Mister postman look and see _

_ Is there a letter in your bag for me _

_ I been waiting a long, long time _

_ Since I heard from that girl of mine _

_ There must be some word today _

_ From my girlfriend so far away _

_ Please Mister postman look and see _

_ If there's a letter, a letter for me _

_ I been standing here waiting Mister postman _

_ So patiently _

_ For just a card or just a letter _

_ Saying she's returning home to me _

_ Mister postman look and see _

_ Is there a letter in your bag for me _

_ I been waiting a long, long time _

_ Since I heard from that girl of mine _

_ So many days you passed me by _

_ See the tear standing in my eye _

_ You didn't stop to make me feel better _

_ By leaving me a card or a letter _

_ So Mister postman look and see _

_ Is there a letter in your bag for me _

_ I been waiting a long, long time _

_ Since I heard from that girlfriend of mine _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ You gotta check it and see, one more time for me _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ Deliver the letter, the sooner the better _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_ You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute _

_You gotta wait a minute, wait a minute..."_

I danced and clapped along to their song from With The Beatles, which had been released back in November of 1963. I felt better, just being swept up in the music. It was a lovely show, I was front row center as I had been in America. They did old songs and new ones, it was a great distraction. That being said, all I could think of through the entire show was Paul. Like I said, I was getting scared and I didn't know when I would be leaving or what would be waiting for me upon returning to 2015. But it also meant whatever I had going with Paul had to end. It just had to, it was kinder. I didn't want to do it earlier because of the show, but I knew it had to be sooner than later. The spell I'd had back there in the hallway was the worst one yet. If John hadn't shown up, I'm pretty sure I would've ended up home in that moment. After the concert, as per the norm, we all ran to the waiting car and took off.

"Hey, that was pretty great." I smiled at them all.

"Well of course, it's us." George teased.

"Well how modest." I chuckled back.

"So what do you want to do for the rest of the night? I thought we could go to a bar or something." Paul suggested.

"That sounds fun, but keep an eye on Ashley, she doesn't exactly have a good track record with those kinds of places." John teased, bringing up the memory of the time I got drunk.

"That was one time." I protested with a laugh. As I did, the inside of the car started spinning again and I wanted to cry. Paul was beside me and I grabbed onto his hand until the spell passed. That one wasn't as bad but it was now the third one in the same day.

"What's wrong?" He asked me, I must've had a death grip on his poor hand.

"I'm fine." I whispered. He let it go, but I knew it wasn't the end of it. I had to tell him. John knew, and it seemed only right that the person who knew the most from the beginning should know too. When we got back to the hotel, the other three piled out and headed back inside but Paul held me back.

"Ashley, what was that back there?" He asked me. I looked around and led him to the side of the building where a light on the building illuminated us both, but we were out of the way of pedestrians.

"I have to tell you something." I started. His dark eyes searched mine.

"Okay..." He trailed off.

"I had that spell up on the tower earlier today...I said it was from the height but it wasn't. I've had 2 more since then. One when I ran out of the room earlier and one just now in the car." I admitted.

"Are you sick?" His eyes immediately widened. I shook my head no and blinked back tears.

"You know I don't belong here. Each of the spells coincides with John. The first time was back on the train to Washington. Remember that? It was after he and I had made good progress and actually had an honest conversation. On the Eiffel Tower, that was after I had talked things through with him and smoothed things over. At the venue, it was because we'd had a chat about his guitar I'd played because it's actually the exact same one I have at home...and the one just now was just from teasing with him... I have no other explanation but that and I think...I think time is trying to send me home." I explained. It was relatively the same explanation I'd given John, but like I said, Paul needed to know. He looked sad and it was killing me.

"So you're leaving?" He asked.

"Well...yeah. But I don't know when... I mean you knew this would happen sooner or later." I told him, tears now welling in my eyes.

"Oh I know, I know but...I don't want you to go." A tear spilled over and down the bridge of my nose.

"Believe me Paul, neither do I. I've had so many...wonderful times here with you and the others... I wish I could stay here forever, but you know I can't do that." I sniffed. He nodded slowly.

"And when I see you again, I'll be old and wrinkled." He said, attempting a half laugh.

"Yeah." I whispered.

"What's going to happen to us?" He asked. I took a shaky breath.

"I think you know the answer, Paul. As much as I'm hating myself for doing it..." I trailed off. He nodded though, understanding.

"I don't want to but... you deserve to find someone who isn't you know... from a whole different era in history." I stammered, tearfully. He pulled me into a hug and I held on tight.

"I understand, Ashley. But... I want you to know that I'll always love you." More tears. I pulled away and wiped my tears on my sweater sleeve.

"Me too. A-And if things were different, if I was actually from here..." He nodded.

"I know." I leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"I should go. It's been a long day." My voice was barely above a whisper.

"Yes, you should get some rest. Come on, I'll walk you to your room." Ever a gentleman. I obliged and we walked in silence up to my room. When we got to my door, I faced him.

"I'm sorry it had to end like this." I apologized, feeling completely drained. He pulled me into his arms again and I went willingly.

"Don't be sorry, Ashley. I'll be alright. And so will you." He gave me a smile. I returned it.

"I'll see you in the morning, okay?" I said, stepping away.

"I hope." I added in my head.

"You will. Goodnight, Ashley."

"Goodnight Paul." As he left, I went into my room and closed myself inside. I wanted to cry, but I didn't. instead, I just went to my bedroom and got into pajamas. I took my hair out, but left my locket on. It felt comforting to have it on my person. I crawled into bed and sleep came instantly.

**********************************

" _Ashley!" My eyes snapped open and Sienna was above me._

_ "Sienna?" I asked, confused. Where was I?" I sat up and I was in my bedroom back at home. _

_ "You've been gone for so long!" She cried, throwing her arms around me. I hugged her back, but I was still confused. _

_ "Where have I been?" I asked her as she let go of me. _

_ "N-No one knows... they just found you last night, half frozen to death about an hour from here." Sienna was crying. _

_ "Did I run away?" I asked her. She shook her head. _

_ "I don't know... just you've been gone for weeks. You don't remember anything?" I did. I remembered things but... I reached for my locket but it wasn't there. _

_ "No..." I whispered to myself. Where was my locket? _

_ "I was in 1964, Sienna. I was with Paul and the other three. I- I had a life there. John and I were best friends... he gave me a locket. Where is my locket?" I asked, beginning to panic. _

_ "Ashley, you're delusional..." Sienna murmured. Her words started echoing in my head as my door opened and mum and dad ran in. _

_ "Ashley, you're awake, thank God." Dad said, holding me close. I began to cry. _

_ "Where's John? Where's my locket?" I wept. Dad looked me over. _

_ "You're still out of it, honey. There's nobody named John, there's no locket." He told me as mum stroked my hair. _

_ "No...no, no, no I'm not ready!" I cried. _

I woke up with a start to the sun peeking through the blinds. I let out a breath and realized I was trembling. I didn't miss those awful nightmares I had for weeks on end but this was no better. My loved ones thinking I'd run away, that I was off my head crazy babbling about John and a locket... I didn't even want to think about if it meant anything.

_There's nobody named John, there's no locket..._ It almost sounded like mum had been saying he never existed. I felt sick, so I got out of bed and into the shower to clear my head.

"Today has to be better." I firmly told myself. I didn't know if I could promise that, but I'd sure try. I remembered I had made Ringo a promise the day before and I planned on seeing it through. As I got out of the shower, I dressed in a blue and yellow dress and left my hair down. I looked okay and felt okay for the time being but who knows how long that would last.

"Maybe yesterday was just a bad day." I thought. But it couldn't be that simple. As I prepared to leave and meet Ringo, I turned to the desk. I didn't know when it was going to happen, or how, but I had to be prepared. Going over to the desk, I pulled out the drawer and grabbed the four letters, and tucked them in my notebook. I opened it to the last page I'd written and realized my journal was everything. It was a full documentation of my time with the lads and it even had detailed descriptions of my nightmares involving John, the night of his death and more.

"I should give this to him." I told myself, making a mental note to add one last entry later on. Regaining my composure, I left the room putting my notebook with the letters back into my bag. When I got to the lads room, I knocked again and Ringo opened it.

"Morning." I smiled at him.

"Morning, Ashley. Why don't you come in? I'm almost ready." He replied, so I did. The others were having breakfast and perusing different newspapers. I wondered where they'd gotten English ones.

"Hi guys." I greeted them. They all chorused their greetings.

"Ready for your date?" George smirked. It should've been funny, but I didn't laugh.

"Yeah, yeah." I replied with a half hearted eye roll. Despite breaking up with Paul only hours ago, he looked in good spirits.

"He gets it." I thought. Of course if this was all real after all and we caught up in my future, we'd have one hell of a story. Ringo came back from what I assumed was his room with a jacket and hat on and his camera hanging around his neck.

"Okay, well I'll see you guys later." I then said as they were all engrossed in their reading. It was quite funny.

"Okay, bye." They all murmured back. I laughed to myself as I left with Ringo.

"They're quite boring like this." I noted, closing the door behind us.

"Well you can't blame them. It's the first British newspapers they've seen in weeks. Brian brought them. If I hadn't someplace to be, I'd be pretty much the same." He said with a light laugh. I did also, marveling at how primitive their entertainment was. Though I guess I couldn't really laugh, I'd survived 3 months without my smartphone and I was okay.

"So where are we headed?" I asked, putting a bounce into my step as we got to the lobby and outside

"Well to the camera shop first, I called around last night and found one who could help me in English." He explained with a smile.

"Well you could've asked me for help." I reminded him.

"Yeah, I didn't think of that. But that's okay. Then after, we can grab something to eat and see how the photos turned out. Sound good?" I nodded, eagerly.

"It does." And so we took off.

**  
**


	48. FORTY SEVEN

**FORTY SEVEN**

****

Ringo and I took a cab to the camera shop where the shop owner was very helpful. He did speak English, like Ringo had said, but I had to help the poor man out a couple times because he had a very thick accent and Ringo was sometimes hard to understand, especially to a Frenchman. We had to wait for the photos to be developed, so we perused some shops nearby. We chatted back and forth, but nothing stressful. Ringo knew how to keep it light and I appreciated it. I browsed through some cheap jewellery, Ringo was quite captivated by all the postcards. It was really nice. When we went back to get the photos, I was actually quite excited to see how they turned out.

"Let's wait until we get to the café, makes it more suspenseful." He suggested, wiggling his eyebrows as the camera shop owner gave him the package of pictures, and we left. I tried to remember all the times I'd had my picture taken by him. At first, I wasn't overly keen on the idea, given the fact that I wasn't even supposed to be in this timeline, but I'd lightened up. Maybe those photos would one day give conclusive proof that I wasn't off my block crazy. I recalled my dream again as we walked and it gave me shivers.

"Are you chilly?" Ringo asked me.

"Um, no. No, I was just thinking." I admitted.

"You have a lot on your mind lately, huh?" I nodded.

"Yeah, you have no idea."

"Well that's what right now is for. To take your mind off everything." He was so sweet.

"Thanks, Ringo." I smiled at him as we approached a café.

"Is this the one?" I asked and he nodded. Walking inside, I was hit with a waft of coffee and fresh baked goods mixed together. It was quite calming.

"Smells amazing in here." I voiced my thought.

"I'll say. Should we sit down?" He suggested. So we did, at a cute little table for two. As I removed my jacket, a waiter came over with a rather funny looking mustache and began asking us in French if we'd like to start off with some drinks. Poor Ringo looked baffled for a moment until I leaned close to him and asked him what he wanted to drink. I ordered both of us coffees in French and thanked the waiter, before he left.

"It's still so weird that you can talk like that." Ringo noted. I smiled and picked up the menu.

"You're telling me they never taught French to you in school?" Ask a stupid question...

"You kidding? It was Liverpool, we basically learned how to spell and add. That was it." I couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but I laughed anyway. When our coffees were brought over, I ordered our lunch and we were left alone again.

"Should we see the pictures now?" I asked him eagerly.

"Oh right. Yeah, let's have a look." He replied, taking the package out of his jacket pocket. He opened the flap and took the stack out, setting it in the middle of the table. The first ones were the most recent, from the Eiffel Tower only the day before. I liked them, they turned out great. They were black and white, but I didn't care. Back in 2015, black and white was a sought after feature for a lot of pictures.

"Hey, look at us. They turned out good." I smiled, going through few more pictures. They went backwards because there were some from America I'd nearly forgotten about. Some were of all of us, some only had me, some only a few of the lads or one of them at a time, some were of me with one of them. Some I didn't even know my picture was being taken, sort of a candid shot. There was one of me laughing at something George had said and I felt a pang in my heart again. He was so happy.

"Don't. It can't work." I reminded myself. A few more photos, were of John and I. I remembered what was taking place in those ones. We'd just begun opening up to one another and I was so pleased.

"I'll let you browse through them. I'm just gonna go wash up." Ringo suddenly spoke.

"Oh, sure." I smiled, breaking my focus away from the pictures. When he left, my eyes rested on the one of George and I again. I felt tears threatening and pushed them away.

"Stop it. It's history, it's just how things play out for him." I thought. But it wasn't fair! I'd given John a chance. George deserved one too.

"But I can't pinpoint his. It was cancer." I'd gone over that so many times already. But it wasn't any more satisfying. Before I started crying in the middle of the café, I dug out my notebook from my bag and just started writing.

_I'm so at war with myself. My time here, I fear is drawing to a close and yet there's so much left I want to do. I know I belong back in 2015 with my family, but it's just going to be really, really hard to say goodbye. Especially to John and George. Though John now has a chance, through a series of unfortunate circumstances provided in part by me, but I still blame myself for placing the burden on him. I feel like I should give George a chance too, but it's much harder to prevent. Cancer is a cruel mistress if I ever saw one and sweet, loving George shouldn't have to succumb to it. November 29, 2001 should not be his last day on this earth, he died much too young. He had so much left to grace the world with. His love of peace, his kind hearted ways, his mindful lyrics. But what can I do? His cancer developed in the late 90s. First in his throat, then it gradually moved to his lungs and finally his brain. It's not like I can cure cancer. I mean, I could try... but really. So that's why I'm at war with myself. I could tell George, but that'd only be warning him of his death and telling him there's nothing anybody can do about it. I'm sure he fought hard when he was undergoing the cancer treatment, but sadly, the disease would win..._

I stopped writing as Ringo came back.

"What are you writing?" He asked, in a laid back tone. I slapped the book closed and set it on my lap.

"Just my travels." I replied.

"So you can show everyone you know back...you know." He said in a low voice. I nodded.

"Something like that." I replied, remembering my promise to myself to give it to John in parting. I realized then that I couldn't have that entry in it... it explicitly told of George's death.

"I'm gonna have to go through this and make sure it's safe." I thought, slowly reaching and ripping out the last entry I'd just written and folding it in my lap. As our food was brought to us, I let Ringo look over all his pictures and we chatted about what we remembered about each photo. I began to relax again and meant to just stuff my notebook and the piece of paper into my bag, the paper to throw out, but then the room began spinning again.

"Not this again!" I thought, gripping the table, lest I fall off the chair.

"Ashley?" Ringo's voice echoed.

"Ashley, are you okay?" When it stopped, I stood up, setting the notebook and the now crumples piece of paper on the table. My heart was racing, my mouth dry and my palms were clammy. Ringo didn't know about my spells. I wasn't ready to tell him either.

"I-I'll be right back." I said, practically running to the restrooms. When I got there, I leaned over the sink and tried to catch my breath.

"What caused that one?" I thought, wracking my brain. I'd been with Ringo and had just been writing about George. John hadn't even come into the picture. Sure I'd seen a few photos...

"Does this mean I'm leaving sooner?" I worried, regarding myself in the mirror. I looked pale.

Third Person POV:

Ringo was at a loss as to why Ashley had suddenly run off.

"Did the food make her sick?" He wondered. It seemed unlikely, they'd had the same thing and he felt fine. He noticed that she'd been writing in her notebook again. What had upset her? He saw the folded up, slightly crumpled piece of paper on top of the book. Out of curiosity, he picked it up and skimmed what Ashley had written.

Ashley's POV

About five minutes later, I felt okay enough to leave the bathroom. I tried to take a few calming deep breaths and enjoy the rest of the 'date' as everyone else kept calling it. Ringo was still sitting at the table and in my dazed state, I just picked up my notebook and stuffed it in the bag without even realizing the paper on top was missing.

"Are you okay?" I got asked that a lot, but I nodded.

"Yeah, sorry. Um...is there anywhere else you wanted to go?" I asked, trying to be casual.

"Well, I know we have another interview this afternoon, so I guess we should head back, if that's okay with you." Ringo replied. I nodded.

"Sure." So we paid and left. I was still in a little bit of a daze as we walked back down the street and passed the camera shop again. I knew we needed a cab to get back to the hotel too. We walked in silence, which was okay because I was slowly getting a headache, when suddenly behind us we heard.

"Ringo!!" In a high pitched, screaming voice. We both whirled around and about five teenage girls were running towards us.

"Uh... Run?" I suggested.

"Will you be okay to run?" He asked me.

"Yes! Go!" I cried, breaking into a flat out run and dragging Ringo along with me. We ran down the sidewalk, dodging people as we went. It felt good to run, actually, despite how I'd been feeling only minutes prior. I kept looking over my shoulder, but those girls weren't giving up!

"Are they gone?" Ringo panted.

"No. Not yet." I replied, getting breathless as well. We came upon a large alleyway.

"Quick, in here." I told him and we ducked into the alley. I pressed against the wall and he followed suit. I heard the sound of running footsteps pass us and poked my head out.

"Okay, I think we're good." I said after a few minutes.

"Well that was fun." Ringo chuckled as we stepped back onto the street.

"Yeah, well I always have fun with you." I told him. He looked a little taken aback at the comment, but pleased at the same time.

"I have fun with you too. You're definitely one of a kind."

***************************

When we returned to the hotel, I felt better and was a little excited to head out again for another interview. The lads may have hated it, but I had watched all these interviews online. It was awesome to see them in person.

"I'll meet you at you guys suite, I just have to freshen up." I told Ringo, as I headed for the staircase. I wanted to do something with my hair if we were going out. When I got to my room though, it happened again. It was another bad one, like the one I'd had the night before at the venue.

"Oh no..." I said aloud. I felt my knees buckle and everything went black.

 

_"I was dreaming of the past... and my heart was beating fast..."_

_ I knew that song. Where was it coming from? I couldn't see, all around me was pitch black. _

_ "Hello?" I called, trying to sit up. my voice echoed, but no one answered. _

_ "I didn't mean to hurt you... I'm sorry that I made you cry... I didn't want to hurt you... I'm just a jealous guy..." It was John's song. I knew it well, it was from his first solo album. _

_ "Hello!?" I called again, this time louder. Again, no reply. _

_ "Where am I?" I cried. _

_ "You're dreaming. Wake up." I thought. I tried, but nothing was happening. _

_ "Help!" I cried as the song kept playing. I found the floor underneath me and pounded on it with my fists. _

_ "Help me!!" _

"Help!" I cried, sitting up straight, like I'd been electrocuted.

"Ashley! Ashley, calm down, it's okay." John was in front of me. I let out a breath.

"Wh-what happened?" I asked, catching my breath. He stood and helped me up as well.

"I came to see how you were. When I got here, your door was open and you were passed out on the floor." He explained, looking worried. I hated having everyone look at me that way, but I guess he was right to worry.

"It uh...happened again. Twice today now." I admitted, looking at my shoes.

"You haven't been with me today." He pointed out. I looked at him and tears stung my eyes.

"I know...I think they're just happening whenever now. I-I think I might be leaving really soon." I stammered, trying not to cry again. He pulled me into a hug and I went willingly.

"I think the others should know." He spoke after a moment. I looked up at him and nodded.

"I think you're right."


	49. FORTY EIGHT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley's last day in the 1960s. What will happen back in her own timeline?  
> (Cried writing this too NGL)

** FORTY EIGHT **

****

I stood in front of the four of them in their suite. I didn't think it would be as difficult as it was, both Paul and John already knew and George and Ringo knew I had to go home at some point, right? But when I told them, the entire room fell silent.

"So when are you leaving?" George asked, his voice sad. I shrugged.

"I don't know. Could be tomorrow, could be a week, a month... I don't really know how this works. Only that it is and... at some point I am going to have to leave you all." I blinked back tears.

"Will you know when you have to go? Like...it seems wrong just for you to leave without a proper goodbye." Ringo asked, his blue eyes fixated on me.

"I-I really don't know. I don't know much. Just that these spells keep happening and twice now I've either dreamed of home or ...some empty place somewhere in between. Time is telling me a don't belong here and it's time for things to go back to the way they were." I explained, though my voice was thick with emotion.

"We're really going to miss you, Ashley. I mean, you've made these last few months just...some of the best." Paul spoke up. The others agreed.

"I know. And I've had some of the best times with all of you, as well. You all know how much I adore each and every one of you. But you'll all be okay without me." Silence fell again as I looked at each of their faces. I realized then just how much I meant to them. John looked at the time then and said

"We should go, we have that interview in half an hour." The mood was definitely anything but positive.

"Do we have to?" George asked.

"Guys, don't get hung up on me. Go about the rest of your day." I told them, though I didn't sound entirely convincing.

"Ashley's right. She's still here, right now. That's the good thing." Paul added, getting up. The others followed suit.

"You're coming with us, right?" Ringo asked. I smiled at him.

"Of course I am." As we headed out, I fought off another spell. Tears threatened again, but I kept a smile on my face. I wouldn't leave. Not yet. I'd get as unwell as I possibly could before giving in because I truly didn't know what was waiting for me back home. I was afraid to know what was waiting for me back in 2015. I couldn't dare get hopeful, the possibility was still there that I'd just wake up to the same old same in my bedroom, only 9 hours later than when I fell asleep. I'd be positively crushed. I thought of my letters, I needed to give them out soon. I reached up and touched my locket, feeling the comfort it brought me. I really wasn't ready to say goodbye to this life, but it had been an amazing ride.

 

*********************************

 

The interview went well. To anybody watching, the lads all seemed their peppy, jovial selves, but I knew better. Deep down, they were all saddened by my news, even the two who knew longer. I tried to stay positive, but it wasn't easy. After the interview, we walked around a bit and saw some cool shops. I felt fine while we did that, but I knew it wouldn't last. No one would touch the subject as the afternoon went on, we ended up at a nice restaurant for dinner and just chatted about London. Where our story together began. I remembered how completely confused I was, waking up on that bench in late 1963. I was in yoga pants and a t shirt for goodness sake. Even by homeless standards, I looked odd. But then Paul had found me, dazed as I was. He believed me from the beginning and took me to get clothes. Me, this girl he'd just barely met and accepted a story that sounded like pure science fiction. I remembered their lovely flat, how I was introduced to the other three and how John at first wasn't a fan of me. I remembered the times I played piano, accompanying them to the studio, hearing them play, the lovely gala I attended on George's arm, spraining my ankle, Paul being hurt, John going after his attackers only to come home late, all bruised and bloodied. We'd had our first honest conversation that night and slow danced to Elvis Presley. So much had happened in such a short amount of time. Some things good, some things not so good. But I wouldn't trade any of those memories and experiences for anything. When we finally returned to the hotel, I planned on turning in, but the others insisted I stay up for a while. So I went back to their suite. As I did, I had another spell. Not a bad one, but they were getting more and more consistent. I openly told them all and the sadness returned. I hated this. I knew I'd see Paul for sure in due time and possibly Ringo... maybe one day if our paths ever crossed. But that was only 2/4. What good was my point of coming here if my future still only had the two left.

"Your letter will save John. It will." I thought. But would it? A warning was just that. A warning. It was up to him ultimately, if he heeded it. And what about George? My dear George. I was still fighting myself with that one. I remembered what I'd written earlier that day and how I'd torn it out. But... I didn't remember throwing it out.

"I must've. In the bathroom when I was freaking out." I told myself as we reached the suite. I couldn't exactly remember, but it was the only thing that made sense to my tired mind. I was very tired. These spells were taking a lot of energy out of me. Another telltale sign, I guess.

"Here, sit down, Ashley." George himself offered as we all got inside. I smiled and thanked him.

"You should have kept that paper, thrown it in with his letter." I told myself. Time was running out.

"I can't..." I thought, upsetting as that was. We all sat in the living room then, the lads continued talking about our travels. They were trying to keep my mind off of what was to come, I'm sure their minds too. I longed to speak with them all one on one, maybe I would tomorrow.

"If I'm here." I worried. I listened to them and shared my own experiences about America, how I liked it, the crazy fans, the shows, but I was getting more and more tired. Finally, I stood.

"I'd love to sit and talk with you guys all night, but I really should sleep." I told them. They all got up.

"A-Are you sure?" George asked, reaching for my arm. I bit my lip and forced a smile.

"I'll be here in the morning. I promise." Could I promise that anymore?

"Okay...goodnight, Ashley." George relented, not letting me go without a hug. Same with Ringo and Paul.

"You guys! It'll be okay. I'll see you in the morning." I laughed, to mask tears.

"Here, I'll walk you back to your room." John offered. I knew better than to argue. Something told me he wanted to talk in private. With one last goodnight, he and I left, walking back down the hall to my room. When we stopped at my closed door, he faced me.

"Just in case this is goodbye..." He started.

"John..." I interjected, but he held up a hand to stop me.

"Just...listen. I've never met anyone like you before in my life, Ashley. When I first met you, I thought you were just this girl who was following Paul around. Even recently, I told you that I had been right about you all along, that you were no good and all of that... I was wrong Ashley. I was so wrong. Even before I knew the truth, you had come to mean so much to me that I never wanted you to leave." He explained. Tears welled in my eyes.

"Oh John..." I whispered.

"But, seeing as you do have to and now I know what's coming, I've made a vow to myself that I'm going to see you again. I have to, because Ashley... you've changed me. I'm a different man because of you and I don't want to lose you forever. I want to be there with you in your future. I want...I want to be your grandfather." A small smile tugged at his lips. Tears were spilling over by then.

"Y-You can't do it for me... I've been so selfish." I protested, tearfully.

"You have to let me do it for you, Ashley. It's going to rip me apart when you leave and knowing I can have that hope of seeing you again, watching you turn into the amazing, strong and talented young woman I've gotten to know here, these last few months is what's gonna get me through. I'll live my life, I'll be happy, I'll do all of that, just so I can see you again." I nodded, wiping the tears away.

"Okay...okay." I finally said. He pulled me into his arms again and I threw my arms around him.

"I'll see you in the morning." I murmured, though I really wasn't sure. He nodded as I stepped away.

"Right. Goodnight, Ashley."

"Goodnight." As I closed myself in my suite, another attack came, but I pushed through it. John had basically said goodbye to me, but I hadn't said goodbye to him yet. Any of them.

"Please, just let me have one more day." I said to myself as I crawled into bed. Despite my emotional state, I fell asleep pretty quickly, my locket still around my neck.

 

**********************************

 

The next morning, I awoke, still in Paris, still in 1964, but I felt awful. I woke up dizzy and just very tired.

"This is it." My mind told me. It had to be. The strain on my body was growing by the hour and I knew today would be my last. Somehow, I managed to get ready for the day. My heart was heavy as I made sure I had my notebook and all four letters with me. I headed straight for the lads suite and knocked. Paul opened the door and I must've looked like I felt.

"How do you feel?" He asked, without a good morning. I sighed.

"Not good. I-I think today's my last day." I said in a small voice. His hazel eyes looked sad.

"Come inside. No one really slept last night." He informed me. I felt bad.

"I'm sorry." I apologized.

"No, don't be sorry, Ashley. We've just all gotten rather attached to you." He put on a strained smile. The others were up, but kind of all bleary eyed.

"Hey guys." I greeted them gently.

"You're still here." George leapt to his feet. I felt my heart dip.

"Yeah. Of course. I said I would be." My voice sounded weak, even to me. I had to sit down.

All four pairs of eyes were on me.

"I um... I'm not feeling so hot though. I think...today might be it." I stammered.

"Oh." Ringo said, sadly.

"I really wish I could stay forever, you all know that." I added.

"No, we know. Listen guys, it's not going to do us any good to stay around here all day moping. Ashley deserves a better send off." John suggested, surprisingly the strongest out of the group, even Paul.

"What do you suggest?" Paul asked.

"Why don't we just hit the town? Maybe go back to the Eiffel Tower, see some other neat spots, Ashley can show off her French skills more to us." Ringo piped up, putting on a strong face. God bless him.

"Alright, that sounds good. Ashley? You up for another day of sightseeing? It's not great but..." Paul trailed off.

"No, it's a good idea. Let me just go grab some things from my room and I'll meet you downstairs." I replied, getting up, only to feel dizzy again. I swallowed hard and left the room. When I got back to mine, I regarded myself in the mirror by the door. I was still pale, but I looked good. I was wearing a dark blue dress with capped sleeves, my hair was in a neat braid and my locket hung from my neck. I touched it gently, the metal was cool against my fingertips. I just grabbed my light jacket, before going to join the lads downstairs. I didn't feel my best at all, but I sure looked my best. When I got to the lobby, George gave me a nice smile.

"Have I said that you look lovely, today?" He asked. I smiled back.

"Thank you. I figured if I'm gonna go, I'll go out with a bang." I joked lightly.

"All ready?" Paul asked. I buttoned my coat.

"Yep. Let's go have some fun." Ringo had his camera, I had my smile, we were all set.

 

***********************************

 

The day went much too quickly. We took a cab to the shops surrounding the Eiffel tower and Ringo just snapped away at his camera. From John wearing a beret to Paul getting creme Brule on his nose, to me staring off into the distance at the landmark rising into the sky. I was feeling plenty unwell, but I hid it as best I could. I could not ruin such a special day. Fans spotted the foursome of course and we had to run a few times, but it was all in the spirit of adventure. Finally, at sunset, we had our very last photo together. Ringo got this mustached man to photograph all of us standing with the Eiffel Tower behind us. I was in the middle with two on either side of me and all of us had our arms around one another grinning into the camera.

"That one's a keeper." Ringo commented. I hoped I got to see it one day. Something told me out of all the photos I'd seen of our travels, that one would be my favorite. After that, we all headed back to the hotel for the evening. All chattering about the day's events but all of us with heavy hearts. None of us knew whether I'd be there to greet them the next morning. I could still wake up there the next morning, but something told me that wasn't going to happen. I watched all four of them in the cab ride home. Could they carry on without me? I remembered what John said the night before. They'd have to keep going, no matter how much they missed me. Once we got back to the hotel, the lobby started spinning and I felt sick.

"Whoa..." I moaned, grabbing my head. Another bad one. I'd had a few little ones throughout the day, but I guess the big one was just another warning.

"Hey... You'll be okay." John reached out to steady me. Now more than ever I knew that this was probably it. Upstairs, I just stayed with the four of them. We were trying to get the most out of that day and played music and just laughed and talked until late at night. Around 11:30, I got this sinking feeling in my gut. I had to do this now.

"Listen guys. Um...there's something I need to give you all." I spoke up, grabbing my bag from my feet and taking out the notebook. I took out all four of the letters and blinked back tears.

"What are those?" Paul asked. I stood, steadying myself.

"They're letters. Each individually from me to you. They um...they kind of say my last goodbyes I guess." I explained, tripping over my words as I handed them out.

"Ashley, you don't have to say goodbye yet. You could stay here tonight." George said as I gave him his letter. When they were all handed out, I sat back down, next to him.

"I'm sorry...I need to sleep." I said, my voice wavering. Next thing I knew; George was hugging me tight.

"I don't want you to go." He muttered. Tears spilled over.

"I don't want to go either. But I have no choice." I said as he let me go. All four of them looked rather forlorn at me.

"You'll all be fine without me. You'll all have amazing lives just on your own, trust me." I spoke to the group.

"But you're special Ashley, to all of us." Ringo said.

"Yes, but I have a family back where I am. But you'll always all be in my heart. And I'll always be with you." I said tearfully. The goodbyes were painful. Of course if I woke up the next day still in Paris, this would all look pretty silly, but something in my heart told me that would not be.

"Have a safe trip, Ashley. We'll miss you." Paul nearly squeezed the life out of me.

"I'll miss you too." I whispered.

"I'll see you soon, huh?" He added, with a whisper. I nodded giving him a small smile.

"Don't you forget us." Ringo said. I hugged him tight.

"Of course not. I never could."

"Maybe I'll see you one day. You know when I'm an old man." George cracked a smile. It made me want to cry harder, but he couldn't know. I'd made up my mind.

"Oh I'm sure you will. I'll definitely look you up." I replied simply, hugging him tight again as well. I held on a little longer with George, just because I knew I'd never see him again. John remained silent. I knew he'd said most of what he wanted to say last night, but I needed to speak with him. Alone was preferable. Paul must've noticed, because he suddenly said

"Why don't we leave you two alone." So with parting goodbyes and hugs, the three of them left. I stood in front of him and we shared a smile.

"So...I guess this is it." I told him, looking at the letter in his hands.

"I guess so. I kind of said my goodbye, last night." He reminded me. I nodded and turned to the notebook sitting on the coffee table. I picked it up.

"I know you said your goodbye, but I haven't said mine. I-I want you to have this. It's my entire story. It'll make you feel like maybe I'm still here... It's got lots about the future in there, your future... maybe it'll help you." I stammered, tearfully. He took it and nodded.

"I'll read it every day, Ashley. I promise. You know, I'm really going to miss you." His voice got low. My lower lip trembled.

"I'm gonna miss you too...so much. But we will see each other again, right?" I asked, remembering his promise. He gave me a firm nod.

"I will. I swear to you, Ashley. Come hell or high water, I will see you again." Tears spilled down my cheeks as I reached up and took off my locket.

"Then take this." I told him, setting the necklace in the palm of his hand.

"Why?" He asked.

"As a reminder. I'll get it back from you one day. Just...be there." I wept. He closed it in his hand as I threw my arms around him one last time.

"I'll be there. So I won't say goodbye. I'll just say...until then." I looked up at him. I knew he promised, I knew he had everything to help him avoid that horrible night, but I knew anything was still possible. I wanted to remember every last detail about him, before I returned home to...whatever would be. I gave him a tearful smile though and repeated his words.

"Until then." We embraced one last time and he kissed my forehead. That made me want to cry harder, but I held it together as I made myself break away from him. I left the room and didn't look back. The walk back to my room felt like an eternity. I wanted to run back and say I was never leaving but that was not possible. I got myself ready for bed, packing my things into my bag like I was literally leaving. At the bottom was the clothes I had arrived in. the yoga pants and shirt. Something felt right about them, so I changed into them. They felt weird on my body, like they didn't belong. Curling up in bed with tears still in my eyes, I slowly hummed a tune to myself before my eyes slid closed..

  
  



	50. FORTY NINE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashley's last day in the 1960s. What will happen back in her own timeline?  
> (Cried writing this too NGL)

** FORTY EIGHT **

****

I stood in front of the four of them in their suite. I didn't think it would be as difficult as it was, both Paul and John already knew and George and Ringo knew I had to go home at some point, right? But when I told them, the entire room fell silent.

"So when are you leaving?" George asked, his voice sad. I shrugged.

"I don't know. Could be tomorrow, could be a week, a month... I don't really know how this works. Only that it is and... at some point I am going to have to leave you all." I blinked back tears.

"Will you know when you have to go? Like...it seems wrong just for you to leave without a proper goodbye." Ringo asked, his blue eyes fixated on me.

"I-I really don't know. I don't know much. Just that these spells keep happening and twice now I've either dreamed of home or ...some empty place somewhere in between. Time is telling me a don't belong here and it's time for things to go back to the way they were." I explained, though my voice was thick with emotion.

"We're really going to miss you, Ashley. I mean, you've made these last few months just...some of the best." Paul spoke up. The others agreed.

"I know. And I've had some of the best times with all of you, as well. You all know how much I adore each and every one of you. But you'll all be okay without me." Silence fell again as I looked at each of their faces. I realized then just how much I meant to them. John looked at the time then and said

"We should go, we have that interview in half an hour." The mood was definitely anything but positive.

"Do we have to?" George asked.

"Guys, don't get hung up on me. Go about the rest of your day." I told them, though I didn't sound entirely convincing.

"Ashley's right. She's still here, right now. That's the good thing." Paul added, getting up. The others followed suit.

"You're coming with us, right?" Ringo asked. I smiled at him.

"Of course I am." As we headed out, I fought off another spell. Tears threatened again, but I kept a smile on my face. I wouldn't leave. Not yet. I'd get as unwell as I possibly could before giving in because I truly didn't know what was waiting for me back home. I was afraid to know what was waiting for me back in 2015. I couldn't dare get hopeful, the possibility was still there that I'd just wake up to the same old same in my bedroom, only 9 hours later than when I fell asleep. I'd be positively crushed. I thought of my letters, I needed to give them out soon. I reached up and touched my locket, feeling the comfort it brought me. I really wasn't ready to say goodbye to this life, but it had been an amazing ride.

 

*********************************

 

The interview went well. To anybody watching, the lads all seemed their peppy, jovial selves, but I knew better. Deep down, they were all saddened by my news, even the two who knew longer. I tried to stay positive, but it wasn't easy. After the interview, we walked around a bit and saw some cool shops. I felt fine while we did that, but I knew it wouldn't last. No one would touch the subject as the afternoon went on, we ended up at a nice restaurant for dinner and just chatted about London. Where our story together began. I remembered how completely confused I was, waking up on that bench in late 1963. I was in yoga pants and a t shirt for goodness sake. Even by homeless standards, I looked odd. But then Paul had found me, dazed as I was. He believed me from the beginning and took me to get clothes. Me, this girl he'd just barely met and accepted a story that sounded like pure science fiction. I remembered their lovely flat, how I was introduced to the other three and how John at first wasn't a fan of me. I remembered the times I played piano, accompanying them to the studio, hearing them play, the lovely gala I attended on George's arm, spraining my ankle, Paul being hurt, John going after his attackers only to come home late, all bruised and bloodied. We'd had our first honest conversation that night and slow danced to Elvis Presley. So much had happened in such a short amount of time. Some things good, some things not so good. But I wouldn't trade any of those memories and experiences for anything. When we finally returned to the hotel, I planned on turning in, but the others insisted I stay up for a while. So I went back to their suite. As I did, I had another spell. Not a bad one, but they were getting more and more consistent. I openly told them all and the sadness returned. I hated this. I knew I'd see Paul for sure in due time and possibly Ringo... maybe one day if our paths ever crossed. But that was only 2/4. What good was my point of coming here if my future still only had the two left.

"Your letter will save John. It will." I thought. But would it? A warning was just that. A warning. It was up to him ultimately, if he heeded it. And what about George? My dear George. I was still fighting myself with that one. I remembered what I'd written earlier that day and how I'd torn it out. But... I didn't remember throwing it out.

"I must've. In the bathroom when I was freaking out." I told myself as we reached the suite. I couldn't exactly remember, but it was the only thing that made sense to my tired mind. I was very tired. These spells were taking a lot of energy out of me. Another telltale sign, I guess.

"Here, sit down, Ashley." George himself offered as we all got inside. I smiled and thanked him.

"You should have kept that paper, thrown it in with his letter." I told myself. Time was running out.

"I can't..." I thought, upsetting as that was. We all sat in the living room then, the lads continued talking about our travels. They were trying to keep my mind off of what was to come, I'm sure their minds too. I longed to speak with them all one on one, maybe I would tomorrow.

"If I'm here." I worried. I listened to them and shared my own experiences about America, how I liked it, the crazy fans, the shows, but I was getting more and more tired. Finally, I stood.

"I'd love to sit and talk with you guys all night, but I really should sleep." I told them. They all got up.

"A-Are you sure?" George asked, reaching for my arm. I bit my lip and forced a smile.

"I'll be here in the morning. I promise." Could I promise that anymore?

"Okay...goodnight, Ashley." George relented, not letting me go without a hug. Same with Ringo and Paul.

"You guys! It'll be okay. I'll see you in the morning." I laughed, to mask tears.

"Here, I'll walk you back to your room." John offered. I knew better than to argue. Something told me he wanted to talk in private. With one last goodnight, he and I left, walking back down the hall to my room. When we stopped at my closed door, he faced me.

"Just in case this is goodbye..." He started.

"John..." I interjected, but he held up a hand to stop me.

"Just...listen. I've never met anyone like you before in my life, Ashley. When I first met you, I thought you were just this girl who was following Paul around. Even recently, I told you that I had been right about you all along, that you were no good and all of that... I was wrong Ashley. I was so wrong. Even before I knew the truth, you had come to mean so much to me that I never wanted you to leave." He explained. Tears welled in my eyes.

"Oh John..." I whispered.

"But, seeing as you do have to and now I know what's coming, I've made a vow to myself that I'm going to see you again. I have to, because Ashley... you've changed me. I'm a different man because of you and I don't want to lose you forever. I want to be there with you in your future. I want...I want to be your grandfather." A small smile tugged at his lips. Tears were spilling over by then.

"Y-You can't do it for me... I've been so selfish." I protested, tearfully.

"You have to let me do it for you, Ashley. It's going to rip me apart when you leave and knowing I can have that hope of seeing you again, watching you turn into the amazing, strong and talented young woman I've gotten to know here, these last few months is what's gonna get me through. I'll live my life, I'll be happy, I'll do all of that, just so I can see you again." I nodded, wiping the tears away.

"Okay...okay." I finally said. He pulled me into his arms again and I threw my arms around him.

"I'll see you in the morning." I murmured, though I really wasn't sure. He nodded as I stepped away.

"Right. Goodnight, Ashley."

"Goodnight." As I closed myself in my suite, another attack came, but I pushed through it. John had basically said goodbye to me, but I hadn't said goodbye to him yet. Any of them.

"Please, just let me have one more day." I said to myself as I crawled into bed. Despite my emotional state, I fell asleep pretty quickly, my locket still around my neck.

 

**********************************

 

The next morning, I awoke, still in Paris, still in 1964, but I felt awful. I woke up dizzy and just very tired.

"This is it." My mind told me. It had to be. The strain on my body was growing by the hour and I knew today would be my last. Somehow, I managed to get ready for the day. My heart was heavy as I made sure I had my notebook and all four letters with me. I headed straight for the lads suite and knocked. Paul opened the door and I must've looked like I felt.

"How do you feel?" He asked, without a good morning. I sighed.

"Not good. I-I think today's my last day." I said in a small voice. His hazel eyes looked sad.

"Come inside. No one really slept last night." He informed me. I felt bad.

"I'm sorry." I apologized.

"No, don't be sorry, Ashley. We've just all gotten rather attached to you." He put on a strained smile. The others were up, but kind of all bleary eyed.

"Hey guys." I greeted them gently.

"You're still here." George leapt to his feet. I felt my heart dip.

"Yeah. Of course. I said I would be." My voice sounded weak, even to me. I had to sit down.

All four pairs of eyes were on me.

"I um... I'm not feeling so hot though. I think...today might be it." I stammered.

"Oh." Ringo said, sadly.

"I really wish I could stay forever, you all know that." I added.

"No, we know. Listen guys, it's not going to do us any good to stay around here all day moping. Ashley deserves a better send off." John suggested, surprisingly the strongest out of the group, even Paul.

"What do you suggest?" Paul asked.

"Why don't we just hit the town? Maybe go back to the Eiffel Tower, see some other neat spots, Ashley can show off her French skills more to us." Ringo piped up, putting on a strong face. God bless him.

"Alright, that sounds good. Ashley? You up for another day of sightseeing? It's not great but..." Paul trailed off.

"No, it's a good idea. Let me just go grab some things from my room and I'll meet you downstairs." I replied, getting up, only to feel dizzy again. I swallowed hard and left the room. When I got back to mine, I regarded myself in the mirror by the door. I was still pale, but I looked good. I was wearing a dark blue dress with capped sleeves, my hair was in a neat braid and my locket hung from my neck. I touched it gently, the metal was cool against my fingertips. I just grabbed my light jacket, before going to join the lads downstairs. I didn't feel my best at all, but I sure looked my best. When I got to the lobby, George gave me a nice smile.

"Have I said that you look lovely, today?" He asked. I smiled back.

"Thank you. I figured if I'm gonna go, I'll go out with a bang." I joked lightly.

"All ready?" Paul asked. I buttoned my coat.

"Yep. Let's go have some fun." Ringo had his camera, I had my smile, we were all set.

 

***********************************

 

The day went much too quickly. We took a cab to the shops surrounding the Eiffel tower and Ringo just snapped away at his camera. From John wearing a beret to Paul getting creme Brule on his nose, to me staring off into the distance at the landmark rising into the sky. I was feeling plenty unwell, but I hid it as best I could. I could not ruin such a special day. Fans spotted the foursome of course and we had to run a few times, but it was all in the spirit of adventure. Finally, at sunset, we had our very last photo together. Ringo got this mustached man to photograph all of us standing with the Eiffel Tower behind us. I was in the middle with two on either side of me and all of us had our arms around one another grinning into the camera.

"That one's a keeper." Ringo commented. I hoped I got to see it one day. Something told me out of all the photos I'd seen of our travels, that one would be my favorite. After that, we all headed back to the hotel for the evening. All chattering about the day's events but all of us with heavy hearts. None of us knew whether I'd be there to greet them the next morning. I could still wake up there the next morning, but something told me that wasn't going to happen. I watched all four of them in the cab ride home. Could they carry on without me? I remembered what John said the night before. They'd have to keep going, no matter how much they missed me. Once we got back to the hotel, the lobby started spinning and I felt sick.

"Whoa..." I moaned, grabbing my head. Another bad one. I'd had a few little ones throughout the day, but I guess the big one was just another warning.

"Hey... You'll be okay." John reached out to steady me. Now more than ever I knew that this was probably it. Upstairs, I just stayed with the four of them. We were trying to get the most out of that day and played music and just laughed and talked until late at night. Around 11:30, I got this sinking feeling in my gut. I had to do this now.

"Listen guys. Um...there's something I need to give you all." I spoke up, grabbing my bag from my feet and taking out the notebook. I took out all four of the letters and blinked back tears.

"What are those?" Paul asked. I stood, steadying myself.

"They're letters. Each individually from me to you. They um...they kind of say my last goodbyes I guess." I explained, tripping over my words as I handed them out.

"Ashley, you don't have to say goodbye yet. You could stay here tonight." George said as I gave him his letter. When they were all handed out, I sat back down, next to him.

"I'm sorry...I need to sleep." I said, my voice wavering. Next thing I knew; George was hugging me tight.

"I don't want you to go." He muttered. Tears spilled over.

"I don't want to go either. But I have no choice." I said as he let me go. All four of them looked rather forlorn at me.

"You'll all be fine without me. You'll all have amazing lives just on your own, trust me." I spoke to the group.

"But you're special Ashley, to all of us." Ringo said.

"Yes, but I have a family back where I am. But you'll always all be in my heart. And I'll always be with you." I said tearfully. The goodbyes were painful. Of course if I woke up the next day still in Paris, this would all look pretty silly, but something in my heart told me that would not be.

"Have a safe trip, Ashley. We'll miss you." Paul nearly squeezed the life out of me.

"I'll miss you too." I whispered.

"I'll see you soon, huh?" He added, with a whisper. I nodded giving him a small smile.

"Don't you forget us." Ringo said. I hugged him tight.

"Of course not. I never could."

"Maybe I'll see you one day. You know when I'm an old man." George cracked a smile. It made me want to cry harder, but he couldn't know. I'd made up my mind.

"Oh I'm sure you will. I'll definitely look you up." I replied simply, hugging him tight again as well. I held on a little longer with George, just because I knew I'd never see him again. John remained silent. I knew he'd said most of what he wanted to say last night, but I needed to speak with him. Alone was preferable. Paul must've noticed, because he suddenly said

"Why don't we leave you two alone." So with parting goodbyes and hugs, the three of them left. I stood in front of him and we shared a smile.

"So...I guess this is it." I told him, looking at the letter in his hands.

"I guess so. I kind of said my goodbye, last night." He reminded me. I nodded and turned to the notebook sitting on the coffee table. I picked it up.

"I know you said your goodbye, but I haven't said mine. I-I want you to have this. It's my entire story. It'll make you feel like maybe I'm still here... It's got lots about the future in there, your future... maybe it'll help you." I stammered, tearfully. He took it and nodded.

"I'll read it every day, Ashley. I promise. You know, I'm really going to miss you." His voice got low. My lower lip trembled.

"I'm gonna miss you too...so much. But we will see each other again, right?" I asked, remembering his promise. He gave me a firm nod.

"I will. I swear to you, Ashley. Come hell or high water, I will see you again." Tears spilled down my cheeks as I reached up and took off my locket.

"Then take this." I told him, setting the necklace in the palm of his hand.

"Why?" He asked.

"As a reminder. I'll get it back from you one day. Just...be there." I wept. He closed it in his hand as I threw my arms around him one last time.

"I'll be there. So I won't say goodbye. I'll just say...until then." I looked up at him. I knew he promised, I knew he had everything to help him avoid that horrible night, but I knew anything was still possible. I wanted to remember every last detail about him, before I returned home to...whatever would be. I gave him a tearful smile though and repeated his words.

"Until then." We embraced one last time and he kissed my forehead. That made me want to cry harder, but I held it together as I made myself break away from him. I left the room and didn't look back. The walk back to my room felt like an eternity. I wanted to run back and say I was never leaving but that was not possible. I got myself ready for bed, packing my things into my bag like I was literally leaving. At the bottom was the clothes I had arrived in. the yoga pants and shirt. Something felt right about them, so I changed into them. They felt weird on my body, like they didn't belong. Curling up in bed with tears still in my eyes, I slowly hummed a tune to myself before my eyes slid closed..

  
  



	51. FIFTY

**FORTY NINE**

****

I woke up to the wind whistling through the trees outside of my window. One of my earbuds was still in from when I'd fallen asleep and a familiar lilting tune greeted me.

" _I will be there, and everywhere...here, there and everywhere..._ "

Remembering immediately, and quite dazed, I sat upright in a flash, causing the earbud to fall out. I looked around my room in a stunned state. I was back...nothing had changed, my posters were intact, my computer was blinking to show I never shut the system down before I fell asleep... it was almost like...

"I didn't leave at all." I said aloud to myself in realization. I started trembling as realization hit me, it had all been a dream. Well as you can well imagine, I felt pretty upset. The possibility had been there, sure, but I never...

"It can't be!" I whisper yelled to myself, feeling tears sting my eyes. It had all been so real. I couldn't believe it. I looked at my one large poster and my eyes fell on John; my grandfather, smiling innocently into the camera.

" _Come hell or high water, I will see you again..."_

" _Until then..."_ His last words to me echoed in my head and tears spilled through my lashes. Instinctively, I reached up for my locket, only to remember I didn't have it. I'd given it to John in parting, which only proved the dream thing further. I had nothing. No proof I was anywhere but my bedroom. The very thing I'd feared had come to pass and I was right. I was heartbroken. I looked over at my window, through tear blurred vision and saw the sky was dark and ominous, almost like it matched my mood. I picked up my phone and unplugged the headphones. Going over to the window, I saw that it had snowed a good deal overnight. I knew I had to get ready for school, but I didn't want to. It was still early, so I just donned a hoodie over top of my shirt and went downstairs. The fact still stood then, that my parents and I had fought the night before, they'd lied to me for my entire life and nothing at all had changed. And now I had to face them. More tears burned as I got to the living room. Mum and dad were still asleep, as the house was dark and quiet. I planned to wallow in self misery on the couch, so I hit the lights. When I did, my hands flew to my mouth in utter and complete shock, as I saw my once very basic living room now adorned with many photographs! And not just ones of myself and my parents; that was nothing new, but there were photos of my family. My real family. Dad with his mother; my grandmother and his father...John! My mouth hung open in shock as I walked past the ones on the wall, some on the side tables... There were even some photos of dad with Paul, George and Ringo that actually looked like they could have been taken in my life time...

"What is going on?" I whispered. There was no way dad would have put these all up overnight, he was much too stubborn to have a change of heart just because I threw a fit.

"Was it real?" I thought, skimming the other photos. It seemed absolutely insane...and yet... A small seed of hope started to swell in my heart, but I was interrupted by a knock at the door. Dazed still, I went and opened it to see Larry our mailman.

"Oh, good morning, Larry...they don't give you the day off when it's ugly outside?" I tried to find my conversation skills lodged somewhere behind the shock I'd just experienced. Larry smiled at me and handed me the mail.

"The only way I get the day off, is if I have a heart attack, Miss Lennon." He joked. But I almost dropped the mail all over the front step. Did he just say....

"I-I'm sorry?" I stammered. Larry merely repeated what he'd just said, thinking he'd offended me in some way. I offered a laugh and wished him a good morning before closing the door and leaning back against it.

"He called me Miss Lennon..." I thought. This was super weird. I scanned the mail and the surname was the same. Bunting had seemingly vanished...

"Almost like it never was..." I whispered.

"It actually happened..." I realized. It was the only explanation, as crazy as it sounded. The proof was now here. There was no way on God's green earth anything changed from what I remembered about the night before. Now expunging my dream theory, I was charged with a whole other type of emotion. I needed answers. Like...what's happened in the last 17 years, did Sienna know about this, was my version of my life story wrong now, and most importantly, Was John alive!? I somehow made it to the kitchen with the mail just as my parents came into the kitchen as well.

"Good morning, love." Mother said, kissing my forehead as she walked past.

"What's up, Ashley? You look like you've seen a ghost." Dad asked me, looking concerned. I swallowed hard and handed the mail to him.

"Um... I'm alright. Just had a rough night." I stammered to them. I must've had such a wild look in my eye.

"You don't look too well, honey. Do you have a fever?" Mum came and felt my forehead. I knew I must have been white as a sheet.

"It was real. Oh my God, it was real!" That thought kept spiraling through my mind.

"No, mum. I just didn't sleep well." I fibbed, trying to find the right thing to say. I had to steady myself against the counter.

"Um... crazy question, did we have a fight last night?" I finally asked. I really didn't know where to begin, I just needed my parents to stop staring at me like I was just revived from the dead.

"A fight? No, of course not. You were out at Sienna's pretty late, remember? You were all excited to see your Uncle Paul, because he was back in town. You came in, told us about your evening and went to bed. Don't you remember? Are you sure you're feeling alright?" Mother was still concerned. I tried to wrack my brain but I couldn't remember! All I was remembering was finding out the truth and the fight...

"Uncle? I haven't even known him a day yet!" I thought, still hopelessly confused.

"O-Okay... what about our last name? Last night my last name was Bunting...and now it's Lennon?" I must have sounded completely bonkers.

"Sweetie, your last name has never been Bunting. Did you hit your head or something? You aren't making much sense?" Dad asked. I waved my hand.

"Um, I just had a bad night." I kept going back to that. My mother chuckled a little at my scatterbrained moment and dad just dropped a kiss on top of my head.

"Well, you've got a couple of hours to find your brain before we have to go." He smiled, coming over to me.

"Go? Where...where are we going?" I asked, still totally dazed.

"Wow, Ashley you must really be out of it." Dad chuckled.

"We're going to the train station. Your grandfather's coming in this afternoon for the holidays. He's been in Liverpool for the past two weeks visiting friends and family. Honey, you've been going on and on about it for weeks. Surely you remember that." He smiled, touching my shoulder. I almost fell over. MY GRANDFATHER?!

"Oh...oh yes of course, huh silly me. I'm...I'm gonna go get myself pulled together." I stammered, trying not to trip over my own two feet as I ran back upstairs. I locked myself in the bathroom and faced the mirror. My eyes were the size of softballs.

"Why can't I remember? They all know a different history than me... this is crazy!" I said aloud. And then suddenly it came to me. Every memory that would have been in this Ashley's mind. I was born in London as Ashley Julia Lennon. I knew Sienna from when we were just barely walking, I spent every Christmas with her and our families would always get together. We went to school together, I'd been to the states with my mother and father many times...but to visit family. My grandparents lived in New York... I remembered my grandfather chasing me around their home when I was maybe six or seven... my grandmother passed away when I was ten years old of cancer... When I was a child, I didn't care who my family and friends were, but it was obvious to me now as these memories came rushing in. I led a whole different life now. Sienna and I were childhood friends, I hadn't only just met Paul 24 hours ago, and my grandfather, John Lennon was alive! That meant he hadn't died in 1980... It all hit me full force and I staggered backward against the wall, holding my hand to my heart. It was racing.

"I traveled back in time... I spent three months with the biggest band in history... I changed the future..." I said to myself, just processing it. I rushed back to my room to start getting ready. This was craziness. No one would dare believe me if I told them that I knew two histories, one where it sucked and this one where it didn't. No one would believe me if I said I traveled back in time...except the people who saw me. As I donned black jeans, a blue t shirt and a grey hoodie, I checked my clock. I still had time before I had to leave with my parents to meet my grandfather, John, who I you know saved...apparently. I was completely freaking out over that, though new Ashley knew him well and adored him, but she hadn't realized that she was with him 50 years ago yet. It was all very confusing. But I knew needed to spill my guts to someone right now who would understand. The only one I knew who wouldn't think I had gone off my rocker... Paul. And he was just a few houses away. I yanked on a pair of boots before I grabbed my phone, coat and hat. I barrelled down the stairs, shouting something about going to see Sienna for a minute.

"Ashley! It's icy, be careful!" I heard mother cry before I slammed the front door. I didn't care. It was bitter cold and windy but I braced myself against it until I made it to Sienna's front stoop. Still shaking, both from shock and the cold, I banged on the door. Who opened it? Paul himself.

"Ashley! What in God's name are you doing out in this weather? Come in before you catch your death in this cold." He lightly scolded. It was just like young him, always fretting over me, scolding me... I wanted to sob and throw my arms around him I was so emotional, but I just stepped inside and closed the door.

"I-I gotta talk to you... somethings happened that I don't think anybody else will understand." I said breathlessly, blowing on my hands, to warm them up. He stared at me quizzically and I wondered briefly if I was wrong and if he also thought I had lost my mind.

"I...I think I may have...traveled through...time." I said, realizing how stupid that sounded as it came out of my mouth. What if I was really nuts? Paul didn't do anything at first but then suddenly I was engulfed in a bear hug.

"Welcome back." He said softly, and I 100% knew. Tears pricked my eyes.

"H-How?" I stammered.

"You don't know how many years I've waited for it to catch up with you...how long we've waited for that matter." He smiled. I stepped back.

"I...changed history." I said. I couldn't believe it.

"I suppose that you did. You know, I never doubted you were from the future. The others all didn't want to believe it, but once Sienna came along, the pieces started the click into place and then when you were born, we all knew. It was just a matter of time." He explained. Wow, this was a lot to process.

"So...does anyone else know? Like anyone aside from you guys? I think my mother and father are about ready to have me committed." I laughed lightly. He chuckled.

"Well, no. But now it's happened, I don't see why not." He said. I just felt this rush of emotion again. I was actually living in the early 60's with those four goofballs.

"So um... when I left...?" I asked.

"We were sad. But I knew you were where you needed to be and I knew I'd see you again one day. And I have to say, watching you grow up after seeing you as you are now, was quite the Benjamin Button experience." He joked. I smiled. I guess it would have been. One thing was on the tip of my tongue.

"George..." I was afraid to know the answer. But to my surprise, Paul smiled.

"Yes, he lives in America." Was his reply and shock grabbed hold of me again.

"Wh-what?" I demanded. How? I'd never given George anything that secured his future, that secured him living past 2001...It was impossible. Right?

"I'm sure Ringo could tell the story better, but I think you'll find the answer relied on a slip of paper you left sitting out at a certain French café with him." My jaw dropped. The journal entry! I hadn't thrown it out, Ringo had taken it!

"Oh my God..." I kept saying that, but I had no other words.

"He-he was supposed to die of cancer in 2001." I said, half to myself.

"I know. I know about John too and what you did for him."

"What? How?" I was baffled, but Paul merely chuckled.

"You really think they could keep such big secrets to themselves for long?" I felt guilty again.

"So I did end up burdening all of you." I muttered.

"No, Ashley. It was a good thing. We banded together because of it. Even when we broke up in 1970, we all knew this wasn't the last time we'd see one another. Even through the rough times when we all fought. One common thing stayed the same and that was our memory of you. And waiting for you." He explained. I'd need to go over the new history, but for now, I just nodded in awe.

"Wow I-I don't know what to say." I stuttered.

"How about 'sorry I took so long.' He teased, we both laughed. Just then, Sienna appeared.

"Ash? Hey what are you doing here?" She asked, approaching.

"I uh...I just came to see how my favourite friend was." I came up with something. I realized how much I'd missed her.

"Oh aren't you sweet." She hugged me. I smiled at her and caught Paul's knowing eye.

"Aren't you going to be heading out soon? His train gets in at 11:30 right?" She asked. I recalled the new memory, John's train did get in at 11:30. I suddenly felt really anxious.

"Um yeah, but it's only 8:00..." I chuckled.

"Well knowing you, you wanna be there five hours in advance, right?" Sienna looked to her grandfather.

"Yes, you do love him." He simply replied. That means something more to me than it seemed. I didn't hang around long, just to say hi to Sienna's parents before I headed back home. The wind had calmed down by then. Before I left, Paul caught me alone again.

"So this is gonna be a bigger day for you that originally planned." He said. He was right, new Ashley would be greeting her grandfather who had always been around. Old Ashley would be greeting her grandfather, her friend and thanking God that he was alive.

"Yeah...I'm nervous and I really shouldn't be." I wrung my hands together.

"Just...speak from the heart. He'll know. He's been waiting just as long for this moment." Paul advised. I nodded.

"I will. Thank you so much...it's nice to know I didn't lose my mind." I said, half laughing. And with that, I was off.

*********************

My parents seemed to forget about my odd little spell when I woke up, which was good. Paul had told me that we'd tell everyone my story one day soon, but for now it was alright with being my secret. Of course I'd probably tell Sienna first. We left for the train station around 10:30 and I was an emotional wreck inside. Of course, New Ashley's memories were chocked full of my grandfather, he still lived in New York and was happy there, but loved to visit. But this would be Old Ashley's first time seeing him...and it was all the more paramount because in the old timeline, he wouldn't even be alive! Every emotion in the book was rampaging inside of me and I had no idea what I was even going to say when I saw him! I knew what he looked like from my new memories, but I don't think it fully clicked with my old ones just yet. By the time we got to the train station and were waiting at his gate, I took to pacing the floor which my parents took to be from excitement but it was excitement, nervousness, fear...

"Hey there, remember when you had a companion for three months in 1964? Yeah that was me. I remember that now." I thought I could say.

"No, that's stupid." I muttered to myself as the announcement came that his train had just arrived. An hour had passed of me pacing and I didn't feel any calmer. I felt the butterflies in my stomach morph into giant moths.

"I remember traveling with you guys..." No matter what I thought up it all sounded ludicrous.

"Just start with hello." I thought as people started coming into the building off the train. I skimmed the crowd nervously, until I caught sight of him. I wanted to cry. He was still tall and stoic looking as he always had been, just 50 years older, a little thinner and his hair was grey. An image of his younger self smiling at me flashed before my eyes briefly, before I realized he was already in front of me, greeting my parents. I stood there like a deer in the headlights. He was here, alive, well...old. Paul's words echoed in my head.

"Just...speak from the heart. He'll know. He's been waiting just as long for this moment." I realized that he had probably figured it all out too once his son and wife had a daughter in 1998 named Ashley Julia. He had watched me grow up and grow in my love of music. He had been waiting 17 years for me to realize I knew him in another time. I knew him when he was a hotheaded jerk, I knew him when I stitched up his face and slow danced with him to Elvis Presley, I knew him when we joked around and teased each other to no end, I knew him when in Paris we sat on the rooftop of the hotel and talked about the stars. I knew him when he said his last goodbye to me. When he promised that he would one day see me again. And that was now.

"Ashley Julia, why so quiet today?" He was suddenly talking to me as my parents had gone on ahead to get the car. I looked at him and had this whole big monologue to say, but all I did was throw my arms around him and start crying.

"You're here, you're alive... thank God you're alive." I wept. I felt him hug me back and I realized I had just made a damn fool of myself. When I finally got it in me to let go of the man, he smiled tearfully at me.

"Well it's about damn time." He said and in that instant I knew. Everything clicked, it was really all true. I let out a laugh as he hugged me again.

"I thought maybe you'd think I'd lost my mind." I confessed.

"There was a time when maybe I would have but...not anymore." He replied, smiling at me. Old Ashley kicked in then as I just chuckled and asked.

"God, what happened to you?" He laughed in response and said

"You took a bloody long time to show up." Without missing a beat. It was like our old selves, bantering back and forth all the time. I just smiled, realizing I had accomplished the impossible. I had changed the future.

"Yeah, sorry about that, fashionably late and all." I joked with him as we made our way out toward the door.

"Speaking of that...something told me to bring this for you. I figured you might want it back." He said, pulling something out of his pocket. I stared in shock as he brought out the necklace. The very one he had gifted to me over 50 years ago.

"Oh my God... you've had it all this time?" I asked, taking it from him. It was old for sure, but still beautiful.

"It's been waiting for you a long time too." He smiled. It was a day I would not soon forget. I opened the locket, remembering I'd never put a photo in it. To my surprise, one was in there a miniaturized version of our last photo together. I brought it close to my face and smiled tearfully at the five of us grinning into the camera. I felt John, my grandfather, wrap an arm around my shoulders.

"That one was always my favourite." He told me. I looked at him.

"Me too."

**  
**


	52. EPILOGUE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all SO MUCH for reading!  
> This story is kind of my baby. Enjoy the last part.

**EPILOGUE: New Year's Day**

 

"Ashley, slow down!" Sienna laughed as I barrelled down her staircase.

"Well excuse me for going to greet friends I haven't seen in over fifty years." Was my answer.

"Right, I know, I know. You're still sorting out your memories." She said as we reached the bottom. That's right, Sienna knew now. Everyone did. No one wanted to believe it at first, but I had the photo in my locket, Paul had some photos, both he and Jo...I mean Granddad had stories and stories to tell, so everyone saw that it was indeed, true. It was impossible, but hey... it was true. I went to the big front door and threw it open. The first person I saw was George. He and Ringo both knew too, Paul and granddad had no doubt shared the news. George beamed at me as I threw my arms around him.

"I've missed you so much." I cried.

"I missed you too Ashley. I've wanted to tell you this for years now. Thank you." He smiled.

"Thank me? Why?" I didn't deserve thanks by any means.

"I know you wanted to tell me, back then. Everything was in that little note that Ringo had. Your journal too, we all must've read it hundreds of times. And it's because of you that I'm here right now." I blinked back more tears.

"Did you...have cancer at all?" I asked. Like Sienna said, I was still sorting my memories out. He shook his head.

"I cleaned up my life, Ashley. The second I read that note, how at war you were with yourself, I changed everything. Even quit smoking. I wanted to thank you in person one day and, I got to." I hugged dear, sweet George again.

"Well then, you're welcome. Just remind me to give Ringo a good scolding when he gets here." I laughed.

"Why? What'd I do now?" A familiar voice made me look up. as George came inside, Ringo was behind him, coming up the steps. A grin spread across my face and I threw my arms around him as well.

"Ashley, as I live and breathe. You don't look any different." He teased.

"As if I would. You on the other hand..." I trailed off.

"I know, I got old." He chuckled.

"Well, that doesn't matter, I still love you. Both of you." I said, happier than I could possibly be. Sienna was still off to the side, just watching me.

"Oh! Where are my manners? Guys, this is my best friend, Sienna McCartney. I used to talk about her a lot." I introduced as she stepped forward.

"It's wonderful to meet you both. I never thought I'd say this, but Ashley has told me so much about you guys way back when." Just then, as I closed the door, I heard another familiar voice.

"What's going on out here?" I spun around to face granddad. I couldn't stop smiling.

"They're here." I announced. I dove off to the side with Sienna as the three greeted one another, and then Paul showed up. I was smiling so big, but tears were running down my cheeks as well. This was how things were supposed to be, and I alone had made it so. They were some of the greatest minds in music, all four so talented. They were older than dirt, as Paul once said, but they were still making music, on their own, collaborating, having happy and full lives as they all deserved. Paul started showing his old friends into the living room and Sienna happily followed. I held back with granddad and hugged him.

"You're happy." He noted.

"Happy doesn't even begin to describe it." I replied, looking down at my locket.

"You should be proud of yourself, you know. None of this would happen without you." I nodded.

"Well it was part me, part all of you guys. I'm just glad you all decided I was worth seeing again." I joked.

"How else did you think we carried on for so long?" Was his reply as we headed for the living room as well. I chuckled to myself as he went on ahead. They had, hadn't they? They all made their marks on history, on music, even after I left. They moved forward from my departure, had their lives and own memories and learned to carry on.

 


	53. AFTERWORD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please read...

**AFTERWORD**

 

Ten years ago, I was a thirteen year old, incredibly shy eighth grader. I struggled with social problems all of my school years and often hated school because of it. Enter my grade 8 teacher. I'd had him for 7th grade too and I adored him. In my elementary school, we had all our classes with this one teacher and while I was positively awful at anything to do with math or gym, I excelled in English and most importantly, Music.

That year, my teacher wanted us all to do a song report on a Beatles song. Now, I had heard of the Beatles, sure. But I never really had listened to them before. At first, I was at a loss, because I had no idea who this band really was and how I was supposed to write a report on a song I didn't even know. That night, I went home and asked my dad who The Beatles were. He recommended I YouTube the song Yesterday by them and maybe that song would be good for my report. So I did and that's when the love began. Watching that black and white, grainy video of Paul McCartney onstage, singing Yesterday was an entirely eye opening moment for me. I did my report on Yesterday and got 100% on it, believe it or not.

Paul was my favourite Beatle at first, but it slowly changed to John as I got older. Now of course, I love them all, but that's a side point. My teacher and I began this rapport after that, based solely off the Beatles. I was a bookworm and often showed up to school with yet another biography book on them. I downloaded all their music onto my little iPod Nano 2nd Generation (I know, right?) and I found myself through them.

It was then that this story began, the one you just finished reading. I'd never written a real story before, but I poured my heart and soul into a little story about a girl named Ashley who was the granddaughter of John Lennon. It was a lot different from this version, in the very first copy of it was maybe 12 chapters long and in it, Ashley knew who she was all along and wished her grandfather was alive like her best friend Sienna's. Then, it took a turn and I wrote about Sienna's cousin and Ashley's friend Amber, who lived in the States and was quite close to a mysterious old man who ran a guitar shop. (See where I'm going?) Through a series of events, Amber discovers her friend is really the supposedly dead John Lennon and he'd been hiding out and living a low profile for years. The ending involved a reunion with his family and that was about it. But, I didn't stop there, as I'm sure you're aware. Over the next few years, that little story turned into this full length fan-fiction. (I say few years because there was a period of time I lost the original, but that's another story).

The one I'd love to thank in person would be my 8th grade teacher for introducing me to the band that has helped me through so much and made me who I am. I don't know if I'll ever see him again, but if it hadn't been for him introducing me to the Beatles and helping me learn more about them, then I wouldn't be here, writing this little afterword, after completing this story that's been almost a decade in the making. I want to thank YouTube too, for giving me endless playlists of writing music that helped me jump into Ashley's shoes as a character. And last, but certainly not least, I want to thank you readers for your continued support and patience while I was uploading to this site. I honestly never thought this would get that big of a reception. Silly me figured I was maybe just one of a handful of people in my generation who loved these guys. Clearly I was wrong, and I'm so glad that I was. Anyway, that's it from me. I hope you all enjoyed Carry On.

****  
  
  



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